On Friday my 10 year old daughter stays at school one hour later for extra help with her education, however this past Friday the teacher suddenly decided she wanted another child to stay instead. My daughter was then sent home from school and no-one bothered to tell me. My mom will normally pick up my daughter from school but on a Friday she goes to my aunts first then goes to pick my daughter up. Luckily my mom was on the bus going past my house & saw my daughter walking along the road, otherwise my daughter would have gone home to a locked up house & since she has no friends living near by would have been stood outside our home for over a hour. When I got home at 9pm i found a message on my answermachine informing me to pick her up earlier, and to ring school to let them know I had received the message. My point is - since the school had to leave a message, wouldnt it have been obvious that no-one was at home? they know i work & they also have my mobile number so upon not getting an answer at home wouldnt it have been better to contact me on my mobile, and they shouldnt have let her come home without an aknowledging phone call.

It was just by pure luck that my moms bus was running late or she would never have seen her, this could have had tragic consequences, my mom turning up at school at 4 only to be told my daughter had left at 3. Ensuring my mother would then panic & try to rush home, which since she suffers from angina, this could have triggered an angina or worse, heart attack. My daughter would have then been sat outside my house, alone in the dark, cold & terrified until I returned home at 9pm.

I also mention that I live in S5 so not a very safe place for a young girl to be alone at night at the moment.

I will be visiting school in the morning with my complaint, but I wonder if anyone has any advice on who I could take my complaint to if the school decide to close ranks & defend the guilty parties?

which school was that

On Friday my 10 year old daughter stays at school one hour later for extra help with her education, however this past Friday the teacher suddenly decided she wanted another child to stay instead. My daughter was then sent home from school and no-one bothered to tell me. My mom will normally pick up my daughter from school but on a Friday she goes to my aunts first then goes to pick my daughter up. Luckily my mom was on the bus going past my house & saw my daughter walking along the road, otherwise my daughter would have gone home to a locked up house & since she has no friends living near by would have been stood outside our home for over a hour. When I got home at 9pm i found a message on my answermachine informing me to pick her up earlier, and to ring school to let them know I had received the message. My point is - since the school had to leave a message, wouldnt it have been obvious that no-one was at home? they know i work & they also have my mobile number so upon not getting an answer at home wouldnt it have been better to contact me on my mobile, and they shouldnt have let her come home without an aknowledging phone call.

It was just by pure luck that my moms bus was running late or she would never have seen her, this could have had tragic consequences, my mom turning up at school at 4 only to be told my daughter had left at 3. Ensuring my mother would then panic & try to rush home, which since she suffers from angina, this could have triggered an angina or worse, heart attack. My daughter would have then been sat outside my house, alone in the dark, cold & terrified until I returned home at 9pm.

I also mention that I live in S5 so not a very safe place for a young girl to be alone at night at the moment.

I will be visiting school in the morning with my complaint, but I wonder if anyone has any advice on who I could take my complaint to if the school decide to close ranks & defend the guilty parties?

Get a grip. Sure they could have phoned your mobile, bare in mind the call charges though.

This does not appear to be acceptable. I think the head teacher needs to know about this really. I'd probably, take a deep breath (;)), then phone and ask to speak to the headteacher, and ask him/her to investigate what happened and then to speak to you later that day.

I'm guessing that your main motivation for calling, besides the fact that you're not happy with what happened, is to make sure that policy is reviewed and strictly adhered to, so that there is no chance of this happening again, either to your daughter, or anyone else.

Get a grip. Sure they could have phoned your mobile, bare in mind the call charges though.

You get a grip.

Call charges? Are you serious? So it's best to avoid what, like 30p max when a 10 year old girl is going to be sent home than informing the parents, it's a young girl! They shouldn't have let her leave school until they had been in contact with parents, that's rules and it wouldn't have hurt to keep her in school until they could contact them, since the child is schools responsibility and in their care until that time.

Get a grip. Sure they could have phoned your mobile, bare in mind the call charges though. :loopy: :loopy:

what a stupid comment to say!!!this is a 10 year old that has been sent home with the parents not knowing!!! s5 is not a place for any young person to be walking around at the minute.
id be having words with the school.:rant:

That's a horrible comment. Why should the Parent get a grip. All parents in the same situation would be angry too especially with all the events happening in the area lately. I would certainly go to the head regarding this

I don't understand why they didn't call you on your mobile. My school when it has a message for me phones me on both home line and mobile line. They always do that. I would definitely contact school and make sure they don't do such a thing again. They are also supposed to not change anything with less than 24 hours notice.

I don't get why they didn't ring your mobile or work place? But I have to admit if this is not a formal childcare arrangment, then maybe more guidlines should be made so both you and the school are aware of whats happening, and if changes occur you are given more of a warning.

Get a grip. Sure they could have phoned your mobile, bare in mind the call charges though.

Call charges
Vs
Childs saftey.
=
no contest.
The school was out of order and should be held to account.

Yosser is obviously not a parent.

Get a grip. Sure they could have phoned your mobile, bare in mind the call charges though.

Im sorry but what planet are u on?, so you saying the cost of a mobile phone call is more important then sending a 10 year old girl home early without notifying her parents, especially when there is a sex attacker on the lose in that area, you saying the cost of a mobile phone call is more important then a childs safety?

The school are quite happy to phone my mobile on any other occassion.

But lets say the cost of a phone call is more important then a childs safety - then why couldnt they think well we havent been able to contact anyone on the one time we have called, lets call later but meanwhile keep the child in school until contact has been made?

Summa, you mention if this was not a formal childcare arrangement. Well as far as I understand when the teacher in question informed me the previous week that my daughter would be continuing her 1 to 1 lessons with her on a Friday for the next 10 weeks, I would think that was a formal arrangement. So as far as I was aware, the school was responsible for my daughters welfare until 4pm on Fridays.

I would like to thank everyone for your comments, its good to know that unlike the school you agree this was a serious mistake to make (I went to the school today to ask them to explain what had happened, only to be told, well dont know why ur so upset, no harm was done, unfortunately at that point my normal calm facade vanished & I erupted).

It wasn't clear from your post if this was a formal arrangment like the 'after school club' at my son's school, never the less they should have informed you and not let her go untill you was made aware of the situation.
My point was that if it was a agreed arrangment, you should set up some guidlines with school so you all know where you stand. It should go without saying that a school should have childrens saftey as a priority.

From what you have put it would appear that there is a problem.

The school asked you to confirm that you had recieved the message on the answer machine , you did not confirm that message therefore (presuming no else confirmed it on your behalf) the school by asking you to confirm is aware that you may not have had the message , so therefore they should have systems in place to stop the child going home if they have not had a "message received" call.

The incident needs to be investigated including checking that the school have your phone numbers correct and no phone calls were sent to your mobile . Mobile phones can some times be rung but the call doesnt get through, however , even if a call was made to your mobile as you didnt answer the child should have been kept behind to the time they usually go home on that day.

If a headmaster or a member of staff said they didnt ring you on your mobile due to the cost then that is discusting and I would argue that the school should review its policy indeed , if that is the case then should be this school be looking after children with a attitude like that ?

From what you have put it would appear that there is a problem.

The school asked you to confirm that you had recieved the message on the answer machine , you did not confirm that message therefore (presuming no else confirmed it on your behalf) the school by asking you to confirm is aware that you may not have had the message , so therefore they should have systems in place to stop the child going home if they have not had a "message received" call.

The incident needs to be investigated including checking that the school have your phone numbers correct and no phone calls were sent to your mobile . Mobile phones can some times be rung but the call doesnt get through, however , even if a call was made to your mobile as you didnt answer the child should have been kept behind to the time they usually go home on that day.

If a headmaster or a member of staff said they didnt ring you on your mobile due to the cost then that is discusting and I would argue that the school should review its policy indeed , if that is the case then should be this school be looking after children with a attitude like that ?

What he said. It's not acceptable to send a 10 year old home without your confirmation, particularly in light of the incidents of the past few weeks in the very area.

You should certainly complain to the school and ask them to investigate - this is a safeguarding issue that the school has to take seriously. Try and keep your cool, which can be difficult in cirumstances like this. The school should have a complaints policy which you can ask for. If you make a written complaint the school will have to investigate and the matter should be brought to the attention of the schools governing body.

If you make a written complaint the school will have to investigate and the matter should be brought to the attention of the schools governing body.

Its already been brought to the attention of the schools governing body - I am a school governor.

and you're 100% correct about needing to keep my cool, normally I do, I rarely shout & times I have had to complain & ive always done it rationally without shouting, and I admit I am dissapointed in myself for losing my temper (although I think the fact that it was the first time they have ever known me to lose it must have shocked them, but in my defence I guess having a childs safety put at risk would test the patience of a saint)

Busman, I completely agree with what you say, the school does have my numbers correct as it was only last week they phoned me on my mobile regarding a governors matter, this also have my daughters dads contact numbers, & numbers of both sets of grandparents, so really they had no excuse not to speak to someone.

I hope they sort it out quickly before putting a childs safety at risk again. I'd also be tempted to raise it as a safeguarding issue at a future GB meeting as well - give the school a bit of grief that way too!

Yosser is obviously not a parent.

Or is a t*ssp*t.

What school was it? Someone else already asked you but i cant see a response. Thanks

Yosser is a strange man.

Get a grip. Sure they could have phoned your mobile, bare in mind the call charges though.

Idiot. :loopy::loopy::loopy:

From the sound of things it wasnt a formal ongoing agreement every week for your child to stay 1 hour later than normal? based on the fact that the teacher wanted someone else to stay that week instead.

Therefore, what actually happened is that it couldnt happen that week and your daughter finished at the 'normal' school finishing time (not an hour early). finishing an hour early would only be completely true if there was an official formal amendment to your childs hours which was guaranteed to happen every week.

No?

Agreed that the communication seems a bit awry, but these kinds of posts always seem to be very 1 sided and you get the feeling that people sometimes miss out small bits of relevant info to back up thier position and paint the school as the usual 'bad guy' stereotype

From the sound of things it wasnt a formal ongoing agreement every week for your child to stay 1 hour later than normal? based on the fact that the teacher wanted someone else to stay that week instead.

Therefore, what actually happened is that it couldnt happen that week and your daughter finished at the 'normal' school finishing time (not an hour early). finishing an hour early would only be completely true if there was an official formal amendment to your childs hours which was guaranteed to happen every week.

No?

Agreed that the communication seems a bit awry, but these kinds of posts always seem to be very 1 sided and you get the feeling that people sometimes miss out small bits of relevant info to back up thier position and paint the school as the usual 'bad guy' stereotype

It wasnt a formal agreement? so my discussion with the teacher the previous week when she informed me that my daughter would be having 1 to 1 tuition with her every Friday from 3 til 4pm for the next 10 weeks isnt formal? So basically you are implying that its my fault the teacher broke her agreement with me which resulted in my daughter finishing a hour earlier - since I was expecting her to finish at 4pm (as per my agreement with the teacher the previous week & thus until informed otherwise was expecting her to finish at 4pm every Friday for the next 9 weeks) and not at 3pm - which basically makes her finishing 1 hour earlier then expected. So it is my fault that i work for a living which means I was at work for the 1 phone call the school made to my home number, and let me guess if anything had happened that night it would have been my fault for not ensuring someone was there to meet her for 3pm since i foolishly thought that when I was informed by the teacher she would be teaching her on 1 to 1 basis every Friday for 1 hour after school for 10 weeks.

I am aware that I have repeated myself several times but how else can I make it clear that this was an arrangement made for 10 weeks by the teacher her-self and at no point during that arrangement did she say, well unless i change my mind at the last minute and decide to take another child instead.

As for being one-sided and not laying out the facts what else do you want? I have never ever said anything but praise in the past for my daughters school, hence why i became a school governor, because I believed in the school, and I doubt you have noticed but I have not actually named the school, this was done deliberately as the main point is that a school altered the leaving time of a child without ensuring the parents were aware & not to invite a public flogging of the school, so that kind of throws your conspiracy theory out of the window.

But im curious as to whether you do work for a school as you seem to employ the same principals most schools do when they have done something wrong, and that is to try and put the blame with everyone else except the school

I can well understand your frustration towards this, and it was me my first post that asked wheather or not it was a formal agreement, just because at my son's school written parental consent is required for any out of school activity, in or out of the school grounds.
The after school club also adopt this 'wriiten agreement' policy, which makes things alot simpler than a verbal agreement which can be changed.
As a mum I can understand how angry you feel that your daughter was unattended and was alone, if I were you I would want something more solid than the teachers word in future.

This sounds terrible! I would have been furious. Just thinking though try And drill into your daughter to stay at school until somebody she knows collects her. She will have only done what she thought was best but I would prefer my child to be stood in an empty playground then a empty house with whats happening in s5. Hopefully teachers might take common sense from her And let her stay inside till someone comes.
i really hope You get this sorted.

Well the update to the situation its more positive, I have seen the head teacher today and appropriate & satisfactory apologies made & action has been taken.

Although this doesnt change what happened, there isnt anything really that could change it now, Im just satisfied to know that to those who count, what happen was taken on the same level of seriousness as I had taken it and appropriate steps have been taken to try and ensure this kind of mistake does not happen again

Yh Yh heard it all before that school is a sham i find it hard to find anything positive about it!

Well the update to the situation its more positive, I have seen the head teacher today and appropriate & satisfactory apologies made & action has been taken.

Although this doesnt change what happened, there isnt anything really that could change it now, Im just satisfied to know that to those who count, what happen was taken on the same level of seriousness as I had taken it and appropriate steps have been taken to try and ensure this kind of mistake does not happen again

Good to hear you handled the situation in a sensible manner and got a positive result for the future.

On Friday my 10 year old daughter stays at school one hour later for extra help with her education, however this past Friday the teacher suddenly decided she wanted another child to stay instead. My daughter was then sent home from school and no-one bothered to tell me. My mom will normally pick up my daughter from school but on a Friday she goes to my aunts first then goes to pick my daughter up. Luckily my mom was on the bus going past my house & saw my daughter walking along the road, otherwise my daughter would have gone home to a locked up house & since she has no friends living near by would have been stood outside our home for over a hour. When I got home at 9pm i found a message on my answermachine informing me to pick her up earlier, and to ring school to let them know I had received the message. My point is - since the school had to leave a message, wouldnt it have been obvious that no-one was at home? they know i work & they also have my mobile number so upon not getting an answer at home wouldnt it have been better to contact me on my mobile, and they shouldnt have let her come home without an aknowledging phone call.

It was just by pure luck that my moms bus was running late or she would never have seen her, this could have had tragic consequences, my mom turning up at school at 4 only to be told my daughter had left at 3. Ensuring my mother would then panic & try to rush home, which since she suffers from angina, this could have triggered an angina or worse, heart attack. My daughter would have then been sat outside my house, alone in the dark, cold & terrified until I returned home at 9pm.

I also mention that I live in S5 so not a very safe place for a young girl to be alone at night at the moment.

I will be visiting school in the morning with my complaint, but I wonder if anyone has any advice on who I could take my complaint to if the school decide to close ranks & defend the guilty parties?

A similar thing happened to me recently my daughter is 7 and I had taken her to school on the morning in question and left her there at registration time which is 8:55. At 12:10 I recieved a text message saying my daughter wasnt at school and could inform them why!
Any parent can imagine the terror i felt I had been home all morning but never recieved a phone call or anthing. I phoned school and demanded the go and find my daughter and make sure shes definately there, she was just as I had left her.
The schools excuse was that there was a supply rteacher in that day which I have noticed quite often since the new school year and also that they find it easier to text parents rather than ring, we all know texting isnt a reliable source of communication.

I will be visiting school in the morning with my complaint, but I wonder if anyone has any advice on who I could take my complaint to if the school decide to close ranks & defend the guilty parties?

Surely, now that you've stated you're a governor of the school, you'd know how the complaint procedure works...

:huh:

A similar thing happened to me recently my daughter is 7 and I had taken her to school on the morning in question and left her there at registration time which is 8:55. At 12:10 I recieved a text message saying my daughter wasnt at school and could inform them why!
Any parent can imagine the terror i felt I had been home all morning but never recieved a phone call or anthing. I phoned school and demanded the go and find my daughter and make sure shes definately there, she was just as I had left her.
The schools excuse was that there was a supply rteacher in that day which I have noticed quite often since the new school year and also that they find it easier to text parents rather than ring, we all know texting isnt a reliable source of communication.

This happened to me last year, except my son was 4 and in reception class! I got a text message saying he wasn't in schoool and could I phone to say why not , my heart was in my mouth! The office staff had pulled the wrong records up (child with same first name and slightly different surname) They did say sorry and all that, but it really was a frightening few minutes!

This happened to me last year, except my son was 4 and in reception class! I got a text message saying he wasn't in schoool and could I phone to say why not , my heart was in my mouth! The office staff had pulled the wrong records up (child with same first name and slightly different surname) They did say sorry and all that, but it really was a frightening few minutes!

Its scary when simple things cant be done right my point to them was if she had gone off or been took in the 3hrs from when register was took to them contacting me she could have been anywhere!

Its scary when simple things cant be done right my point to them was if she had gone off or been took in the 3hrs from when register was took to them contacting me she could have been anywhere!

That is so true, it is a horrible feeling, and only natural to think what could've happened. Thankfully in both our cases it was an error.:)

It wasnt a formal agreement? so my discussion with the teacher the previous week when she informed me that my daughter would be having 1 to 1 tuition with her every Friday from 3 til 4pm for the next 10 weeks isnt formal? So basically you are implying that its my fault the teacher broke her agreement with me which resulted in my daughter finishing a hour earlier - since I was expecting her to finish at 4pm (as per my agreement with the teacher the previous week & thus until informed otherwise was expecting her to finish at 4pm every Friday for the next 9 weeks) and not at 3pm - which basically makes her finishing 1 hour earlier then expected. So it is my fault that i work for a living which means I was at work for the 1 phone call the school made to my home number, and let me guess if anything had happened that night it would have been my fault for not ensuring someone was there to meet her for 3pm since i foolishly thought that when I was informed by the teacher she would be teaching her on 1 to 1 basis every Friday for 1 hour after school for 10 weeks.

I am aware that I have repeated myself several times but how else can I make it clear that this was an arrangement made for 10 weeks by the teacher her-self and at no point during that arrangement did she say, well unless i change my mind at the last minute and decide to take another child instead.

As for being one-sided and not laying out the facts what else do you want? I have never ever said anything but praise in the past for my daughters school, hence why i became a school governor, because I believed in the school, and I doubt you have noticed but I have not actually named the school, this was done deliberately as the main point is that a school altered the leaving time of a child without ensuring the parents were aware & not to invite a public flogging of the school, so that kind of throws your conspiracy theory out of the window.

But im curious as to whether you do work for a school as you seem to employ the same principals most schools do when they have done something wrong, and that is to try and put the blame with everyone else except the school

I never stated that it wasnt a formal agreement, at several stages in my post there were question marks, denoting questions, or the fact i was unsure. i was just putting it out there and asking

I think you got a bit carried away in your reasoning too

And no, I do not work for a school

Thanks to everyones support & unfortunately they don't give new governors a hand out on what to do in this situation, unfortunately parent governors don't really know much more then parents.

I am disheartened as a parent & a governor to learn this isn't an isolated incident but seems many others have had similar experiences. Maybe I should try & do something constructive about my experience & use the knowledge I have & maybe pull a few favours from "expert" friends & work with schools to form a more reliable, efficient system that maybe has less room for human error

Quite right to complain,i would too!

Thanks to everyones support & unfortunately they don't give new governors a hand out on what to do in this situation, unfortunately parent governors don't really know much more then parents.

I am disheartened as a parent & a governor to learn this isn't an isolated incident but seems many others have had similar experiences. Maybe I should try & do something constructive about my experience & use the knowledge I have & maybe pull a few favours from "expert" friends & work with schools to form a more reliable, efficient system that maybe has less room for human error

Hi Nexusdee

Sorry to hear about your Daughter being sent home. I think this is unforgivable by the school.

I have 3 children aged 12, 10 and 9. and my childrens school (which is in Wath) would never do this.

I did have an occasion where my son said he was involved in an after school club so I took my other two home. When I got to school at 4pm it turned out the after school club had been cancelled due to some circumstances so he stayed with the teachers until I came to pick him up.

I would have gone nuts if they had sent him home without informing me. But like I said they just wouldn't have done that.

Glad your getting things sorted though.

Whilst legally Im sure they have to notify you and I think you are right to complain, why didn't the 10 year old phone to ask for a key or a lift? Why don't you give her a key? I had one at 9 it would be better that she had one for emergencies.

Whilst legally Im sure they have to notify you and I think you are right to complain, why didn't the 10 year old phone to ask for a key or a lift? Why don't you give her a key? I had one at 9 it would be better that she had one for emergencies.

That really isnt the issue though is it. Its the schools responsibility to sort out getting her home safely when they change arrangements, not the childs.

That really isnt the issue though is it. Its the schools responsibility to sort out getting her home safely when they change arrangements, not the childs.

legally yes it is but surely a 10 year old needs to know what to do when things go wrong. We had to learn the relevant phone numbers and were given a key each at 9 so that if anything happened we could cope. That was before mobile phones, surely all she needs to know is a mobile number and to carry or ask for a 20p.

Whilst legally Im sure they have to notify you and I think you are right to complain, why didn't the 10 year old phone to ask for a key or a lift? Why don't you give her a key? I had one at 9 it would be better that she had one for emergencies.

Thanks for trying to give some advice but there are a couple of reasons why that wouldnt really work

My daughter was told by staff that I actually had been contacted and was aware of the situation. Also after several break-ins last year my house resembles Fort Knox, with the locks and complicated alarm system, but on saying that If my daughter was to have her own key, can you imagine how quickly the school would phone the Social Services on me if they found out she was had been left in the house alone? which could then quite possibly be not that she was in the house alone because of the schools fault, but that I abandon her

Since this happened though I have put measures in place, Im quite friendly with a salon owner accross the road and have made arrangements for my daughter to go there if ever anything happens like that, Im not saying that the school will do it again, but there could be other reasons why no-one would be in to pick her up

i feel for you as this sort of thing should never happen. i guess the only good thing to come out of it is that your daughter now knows of a safe place to go where she can be with familiar people and you have peace of mind. here's hoping that the school never ever puts anyone in that situation again.

i also think its discusting that schools send out maessages in the form of texts, how do they know that they are being recieved and if they are that the correct person has recieved them?? if i worked in this situation i would not be happy unless i spoke to the childs carer in person.

Hatfield primary same thing happened to me today!!!
Nexusdee
I understand that your daughter does the after school club which my daughter also attends at hatfiled primary.
I would just like to tell you that nothing has changed after what happened last week.
I was collecting my daughter at 4pm after i had taken my parents out.
On arrival at the school i was told that she had not done it today but had helped out with some few bits around school.
I thought this was on every week and said can you please let me know what is happening as last week she was kept behind and i didnt even know i was worried so much.
I need to know whats what!
I think your mum was there and she said the same thing happened last week to you.
But if they had told me it wasnt on why was your daughter there?
So off we went home i was fuming but glad she was in school.
So on the way home in the car we spoke about what the teacher said regarding this and she told me that they said it was not on and she had walked after school to her nans who wasnt in (As they was with me) And then back up bellhouse into school!!!
School never told me this i am fuming what can i doo?
Something will happen soon this is to slack.

I thought .....

It sounds like the school have made all the arrangements and that it is the families that are misunderstanding what they are saying. I thought or I know - which is it?

It sounds like the school have made all the arrangements and that it is the families that are misunderstanding what they are saying. I thought or I know - which is it?

Ok my bad it on everyweek ok :confused:

Well the update to the situation its more positive, I have seen the head teacher today and appropriate & satisfactory apologies made & action has been taken.

Although this doesnt change what happened, there isnt anything really that could change it now, Im just satisfied to know that to those who count, what happen was taken on the same level of seriousness as I had taken it and appropriate steps have been taken to try and ensure this kind of mistake does not happen again

The school really does need to take a serious look at their safeguarding policies as it seems they don't seem to have a clue! You should speak to the chair of governors too if you think this is an ongoing problem.

As a Governor you could also contact these for a chat about your concerns,
Your Safeguarding Children Advisors are:

Bea Kay: tel 2735655, mobile 07772348514, or email Bea.Kay@sheffield.gov.uk
Flora Bandele:
tel 2053714, mobile 07734743258, or email Flora.Bandele@sheffield.gov.uk

or have a chat with the Governor support people at Bannerdale to see what their advice would be Email: enquiries: ed-governorsupport@sheffield.gov.uk. Your comment about knowing as much as the parents at school about what goes on are a little worrying too seeing as you're a governor, so there might be bigger problems there than just this?

You might also want to make sure safeguarding issues are on the next appropriate committee meeting as a priority - they should be a statutory item anyway.

Your little girl is ok this time, but there are an awful lot of 'what if's' in this story which could have been so different. We should be able to trust the schools with the safety of all our children. Good luck.

Sex attackers on the loose ...What planet are some of these scaremongers on. A young woman is very sadly sexually assaulted by another young man in Shirecliffe and now we have sex attackers on the loose. Ten year old. If she was at a special school or if she was dysfunctional I could see this complaint being serious. Does she have a mobile like most kids. Or why did she not tell the teacher nobody was at home. Mind I guess families differ today. My mother made sure she was at home long before school came out. But that was when families were real families and we did not pass each other on the way in or out of the house.

Sex attackers on the loose ...What planet are some of these scaremongers on. A young woman is very sadly sexually assaulted by another young man in Shirecliffe and now we have sex attackers on the loose. Ten year old. If she was at a special school or if she was dysfunctional I could see this complaint being serious. Does she have a mobile like most kids. Or why did she not tell the teacher nobody was at home. Mind I guess families differ today. My mother made sure she was at home long before school came out. But that was when families were real families and we did not pass each other on the way in or out of the house.


The child did not know noone was at home
I want to know where my daughter is. If she was ten, I probably would be happy for her to walk home, but only if I knew that she was being sent home.
Its completely not on that children are being sent home without parents being informed, and I mean spoken to not a message on an ansaphone
I would be putting in a huge complaint with OFSTED, school governors and the council

Sex attackers on the loose ...What planet are some of these scaremongers on. A young woman is very sadly sexually assaulted by another young man in Shirecliffe and now we have sex attackers on the loose. Ten year old. If she was at a special school or if she was dysfunctional I could see this complaint being serious. Does she have a mobile like most kids. Or why did she not tell the teacher nobody was at home. Mind I guess families differ today. My mother made sure she was at home long before school came out. But that was when families were real families and we did not pass each other on the way in or out of the house.

Have you actually even read the OP's first post in this thread?

Sex attackers on the loose ...What planet are some of these scaremongers on. A young woman is very sadly sexually assaulted by another young man in Shirecliffe and now we have sex attackers on the loose. Ten year old. If she was at a special school or if she was dysfunctional I could see this complaint being serious. Does she have a mobile like most kids. Or why did she not tell the teacher nobody was at home. Mind I guess families differ today. My mother made sure she was at home long before school came out. But that was when families were real families and we did not pass each other on the way in or out of the house.

I beg to differ, but there was also a 14year old attacked on foxhill as well, which was in the papers.. so no i dont think its scaremongering at all, we need to know our children are safe, end of..
I also think maybe the headteacher has taken on more than she can cope with, i have heard of incidents also happening at the other school she has taken on..
something definitely needs doing..

Well..don't want to end up writing an essay ere??..BUT..my son quite regularly too is either sent home?, given sign out slip?, when it suits school and cannot even give me correct info of whether he is in school or not?..i have wrote to headteacher and OFSTED AND my son as special needs?even tho school tends not to accept!!! i av now decided to keep him at home for worry to his safety. There most recent reply was "they agree"? do i want to pic up some work 4 him to do at home? Eeeer..hello! dont fink so luv!!!!! just getting my work together and in the correct order, they can then pic that LOT up n WORK on it!!!!!!!

Sex attackers on the loose ...What planet are some of these scaremongers on. A young woman is very sadly sexually assaulted by another young man in Shirecliffe and now we have sex attackers on the loose. Ten year old. If she was at a special school or if she was dysfunctional I could see this complaint being serious. Does she have a mobile like most kids. Or why did she not tell the teacher nobody was at home. Mind I guess families differ today. My mother made sure she was at home long before school came out. But that was when families were real families and we did not pass each other on the way in or out of the house.

I agree did you actually read my original post? - My daughter did not know there was no-one at home since she had been told that I had been informed she would be home early. The school knew no-one was at home otherwise someone would have picked up the phone and they wouldnt have had to leave a message on the answer machine, Also my working hours mean I take my daughter to school and her nan always picks her up from school - but at a time the school informs us she is finishing, we are not mind readers and dont know the school cancels an after school activity unless they inform us.

Well lucky you that 40 or so years ago your mother was at home for you, children were safer to play out alone & only the rich would have to pay mortgages, and women would stay married to abusive husbands because it was considered bad to be a single mother, but thankfully times have changed, but it means some of us have to go out to work these days in order to support our own children, but some of us also dont give our young children mobile phones (they cant take them to her primary school anyway) and some of us when we get home from work will then spend a few quality hours with our children, So what gives you the right to try and judge me for working. If being your so called real family means sitting in the house all day oops sorry im female my husband should lock me in the kitchen and beat me if the house isnt spotless, oops but also in your perfect real family day - didnt the men go to work?

As for sex attackers, well obviously education may have changed since you went to school but since there have been 2 seperate attacks of a sexual nature by 2 different people then the plural of 1 sex attacker is sex attacker's

I suggest you stop living in the all so perfect world that your childhood seemed to exist in and move in to this world where both parents work to be able to afford to live but that doesnt mean that they neglect their children

nexusdee, no one said anything about women who stay home and get beaten?
surely your remarks would offend those who want to be a housewife/househusband. but no you are one of those people who are farrrr too important and egotistical to think people are happier than you. trolling you would be so easy i dont think its worth it, it would probably make your head explode.

also, back on subject, do you not know ANY neighbours that your daughter could go to? or are you too busy for that too.

nexusdee dont let them wind you up. they're not worth the time, think it may be a touch of jealousy seeing as wodger guy has stated occupation unemployed.. you are well within your rights to complain about the said school, if ever my children are at school and they cant get hold of me for any reason, then they do call my mobile, i do not understand why they did not do this..

I agree did you actually read my original post? - My daughter did not know there was no-one at home since she had been told that I had been informed she would be home early. The school knew no-one was at home otherwise someone would have picked up the phone and they wouldnt have had to leave a message on the answer machine, Also my working hours mean I take my daughter to school and her nan always picks her up from school - but at a time the school informs us she is finishing, we are not mind readers and dont know the school cancels an after school activity unless they inform us.

Well lucky you that 40 or so years ago your mother was at home for you, children were safer to play out alone & only the rich would have to pay mortgages, and women would stay married to abusive husbands because it was considered bad to be a single mother, but thankfully times have changed, but it means some of us have to go out to work these days in order to support our own children, but some of us also dont give our young children mobile phones (they cant take them to her primary school anyway) and some of us when we get home from work will then spend a few quality hours with our children, So what gives you the right to try and judge me for working. If being your so called real family means sitting in the house all day oops sorry im female my husband should lock me in the kitchen and beat me if the house isnt spotless, oops but also in your perfect real family day - didnt the men go to work?

As for sex attackers, well obviously education may have changed since you went to school but since there have been 2 seperate attacks of a sexual nature by 2 different people then the plural of 1 sex attacker is sex attacker's

I suggest you stop living in the all so perfect world that your childhood seemed to exist in and move in to this world where both parents work to be able to afford to live but that doesnt mean that they neglect their children

You have put your point over very well.

nexusdee, no one said anything about women who stay home and get beaten?
surely your remarks would offend those who want to be a housewife/househusband. but no you are one of those people who are farrrr too important and egotistical to think people are happier than you. trolling you would be so easy i dont think its worth it, it would probably make your head explode.

also, back on subject, do you not know ANY neighbours that your daughter could go to? or are you too busy for that too.

Why are you putting words into my mouth that i havent used? or are you the one that is full of their own importance that you are special enough to read between the lines and decide what you believe people are really writing?

While your so full of your own importance does it mean you dont have to read a post correctly? My mention of beaten wives was stating that back 40 plus years that women would HAVE to put up with an abusive husband because a single mother was frowned upon, and nothing to do with women or marriage today

Your right since im so full of my own importance i should go round to my neighbour and demand he finishes work earlier incase the school inconvenience my highly busy life by not informing me they are sending my daughter home early, after all its not their fault they neglected to tell me, or perhaps my own self importance should make me go knocking on the pensioners flats on the other side of me and tell them they should take care of my daughter instead - which do you suggest?

But why be afraid of trolling me, surely if im as full of my own importance as you claim, it wouldnt offend me, or are you so full of your own importance as to think it would?

You are just so typical of some of these forum users today, I am angry because my daughter was placed in danger by the school but thats irrelevant to people like you and you try to lay the blame on me because either I work or my neighbour works so she cant go there.

You have put your point over very well.

Thank you! & to the others who have given support and constructive advice.

I believe in America they run a safe house scheme for such as happened to you and your daughter .These houses are owned by parents of children belonging to the same school, if a child for whatever reason is locked out of their home or the parent does not arrive to collect them the child knows they can go to any one of the safe houses and be given safe refuge. Obviously SServices are involved in vetting the people who volunteer to do this but it does work .

I believe in America they run a safe house scheme for such as happened to you and your daughter .These houses are owned by parents of children belonging to the same school, if a child for whatever reason is locked out of their home or the parent does not arrive to collect them the child knows they can go to any one of the safe houses and be given safe refuge. Obviously SServices are involved in vetting the people who volunteer to do this but it does work .

Well I think thats an excellent idea, worth looking into that. Thank you!

"perhaps my own self importance should make me go knocking on the pensioners flats on the other side of me and tell them they should take care of my daughter instead"

if your daughter gets sent home for whatever reason maybe they should be able to let her come in and wait? but no, no your right communities arent there to support each other good heavens!

Another namby pamby story what happened to the latch key kids when this was common practice ……………. Oops I forgot there was common sense in those days.

Just because it was common practice in certain families doesn't make it sense. I know of a boy who was a latch key child and decided to make himself some chips and burnt the house down, a girl who was attacked when she answered the door. There are rules for reasons and the parent has real cause for concern as would I if it had happened to my child.

When I was a child families did not have telephones never mind mobiles and relatives generally lived closer to each other.
Nowadays due to people being used to easy communications they expect to be informed in such circumstances.
Times have changed and young mothers nowadays see things differently to the 1950/60s.

Just because it was common practice in certain families doesn't make it sense. I know of a boy who was a latch key child and decided to make himself some chips and burnt the house down, a girl who was attacked when she answered the door. There are rules for reasons and the parent has real cause for concern as would I if it had happened to my child.

Its gone on for decades. a couple of horror stories aren’t going to stop it happening now.

"if your daughter gets sent home for whatever reason maybe they should be able to let her come in and wait? but no, no your right communities arent there to support each other good heavens!

Or maybe if my daughter is to be sent home for whatever reason the school could try phoning my mobile or work number, or any of the other 4 numbers the school requested I give them as contact numbers? But failing that the pensioners next to me are not what you call neighbours as the flats are away from my house, most of them are disabled or ill & since I dont know them that well (what with the tenants regularly changing) Would you agree that allowing my daughter alone in a flat with a virtual stranger would be compromising her safety?

Malky you believe that my story is namby pamby, so does that mean you believe I have no right to be annoyed about what happened? you also mention latch key kids, well as you can see in my case there is no need to make my daughter a latch key kid as her after school care is quite well taken care off, a family member picks her up from school & also rather then do that i would rather give up work as personally wouldnt think it right to allow my daughter to come home to an empty house, but also considering my daughter is only 10 years old I would risk prosecution although the law does not state a minimum age for leaving children alone it is considered an offence to leave a child alone if it puts that child at risk, and any child under 12 yr old would be considered too immature to be left alone and therefore would be considered at risk - That is stated on the NSPCC & government website.

But doesnt all these comments move away from the fact that the reason this situation occured is down to the lack of care of the school? Surely when you leave a child at school you place your trust in that school to take care of that child and to assume some responsibility for that childs welfare until the agreed finishing time? I could understand if the school had no way of contacting me, but then wouldnt it have been more appropriate to keep her at school until the expected time? Or would you suggest that a school can send a child home whenever it wants without informing any adult & assume no responsibility whatsoever for the childs welfare while he/she is there?

while anyone can argue about what type of home a child comes from and what you could do 50 years ago this mother has a valid reason to be annoyed/shocked/worried about the system her childs school has in place for the childrens safety.
i would be putting in a huge complaint. as nexusdee has already stated is that the shcool had many ways of contacting her, how is it then ok to just leave an empty message on an answer-machine? the stories that the schools can also leave texts scares me.
i would love to still live in niebourhoods where we know children can go and knock on various doors and know they will be welcome to stay but sadly we dont live like that.
nexusdee - i hope you manage to get to the bottom of the problem and can ensure this doesnt happen again.

But doesnt all these comments move away from the fact that the reason this situation occured is down to the lack of care of the school? Surely when you leave a child at school you place your trust in that school to take care of that child and to assume some responsibility for that childs welfare until the agreed finishing time?

Reading through your posts lets put this into context.

I don't know what time the bell goes at the school - lets call it 3pm. That is when school finishes.

Your child finished school at 3pm. It sounds like because your child has been identified as falling behind in Maths or English they are getting the Government funded tuition. The Government is paying a teacher extra to tutor your child, with the school being used as a base. This is technically not school - the teacher is now acting as a private tutor, but gets paid by the school still.

Now if your child is over 8 then they will be able to leave school by themselves, it is up to the Parents to make arrangements for them to get home. As with any activity it can be cancelled for various reasons - the child needs to make sure that they wait until they are picked up but the school cannot do anything if they decide to leave (because they were in their right to leave at 3pm).

I can understand your frustration but you cannot blame the school until you know the full reasons why the activity was cancelled.

Oh i know but comon our Girls are 10yrs old

I think the point of the OP is that the school had the necessary information to inform the mother of the situation but did not use it.

Reading through your posts lets put this into context.

I don't know what time the bell goes at the school - lets call it 3pm. That is when school finishes.

Your child finished school at 3pm. It sounds like because your child has been identified as falling behind in Maths or English they are getting the Government funded tuition. The Government is paying a teacher extra to tutor your child, with the school being used as a base. This is technically not school - the teacher is now acting as a private tutor, but gets paid by the school still.

Now if your child is over 8 then they will be able to leave school by themselves, it is up to the Parents to make arrangements for them to get home. As with any activity it can be cancelled for various reasons - the child needs to make sure that they wait until they are picked up but the school cannot do anything if they decide to leave (because they were in their right to leave at 3pm).

I can understand your frustration but you cannot blame the school until you know the full reasons why the activity was cancelled.

First of thanks for putting your post accross sensibly & without insult, but may i just answer some of the points you raised?

Firstly let me explain that my daughter is not falling behind in any subject and this is not the sole purpose of these one to one lessons as also some of the highly intelligent children also receive them and also these arent carried out by a normal teacher as such that would have a class that she teaches lessons too on a daily basis, but by someone who works part-time to support the school (Sorry I am not 100% clear on her actual role, but do know she is the sole person to provide these 1 to 1 lessons.

I did not request my daughter to have this after school hours private tuition lessons funded by the government, but the person in question asked my permission for my daughter to have them with her (also her working hours are until 4pm)

My child would have waited for someone to pick her up, however she was told by the school that I had been informed and would be waiting at home for her? so are you saying that she is at some fault for following their instructions?

I do make adequate arrangements to get my child home, however I am not sure if you are suggesting that the school are not responsible for a child if it is at the schools request the child stays later then 3pm? So in that case would that also apply to the residential trip that the school have organised? does ths mean that the teachers wont be responsible for the childrens welfare after 3pm?

My frustration is not that the arrangements had been cancelled so the reason why is hardly important (although I do know the reason) but my frustration is because the school neglected to ensure that I was aware of the change of plans.

I hope that this answers some of the questions in your post

May I add that I have refused to allow my daughter to go on this trip which has resulted with a teacher from the school coming to my house demanding to know why I am not letting her go, and trying to persuade me to change my mind. Its not even an educational trip

I think the point of the OP is that the school had the necessary information to inform the mother of the situation but did not use it.

Thank you, I think people seem to be missing this point, I dont care if after school activities are changed or cancelled as long as I have been informed.

Here we go again, The Blame Game. There was a time when parents were there for their kids at any time of the day. Not wait till 9 pm to see mummy when they are supposed to be in bed. That is the problem with society today. The school is not to blame. The child is ten years old. Are you trying to tell me that this is a child that is kept indoors all day never goes out to play, Has no friends in the area. That she was alone at school. That she did not have the sense to tell the teacher mum will not be home. This is just lack of communication and no precautions taken by the parent in case of an emergency. This blame game gets worse. The teachers have far more to do than be baby sitters.

By The way. We are only hearing one side of the story here and bit by bit. Teachers should have the right to reply when they are being accused of serious neglect. Hence this should not be a forum discussion till all the facts are known from both sides

Having read your earlier posts and your last ones, you said the school just sent your daughter home at 3pm, but you have then gone on to say that the school actually told your daughter you would be in. Which is just bare faced lying if they hadn't had any communications with you.
My point is, I know your daughter is only 10, but if she is usually collected from school, surly if she is just sent home, she may have noticed things being a bit odd.

Just to take this slightly off topic: make sure that school have at least two contact numbers for you. Most now use an automated texting system, and no doubt it will be used if the weather deteriorates and schools are closed.

Here we go again, The Blame Game. There was a time when parents were there for their kids at any time of the day. Not wait till 9 pm to see mummy when they are supposed to be in bed. That is the problem with society today. The school is not to blame. The child is ten years old. Are you trying to tell me that this is a child that is kept indoors all day never goes out to play, Has no friends in the area. That she was alone at school. That she did not have the sense to tell the teacher mum will not be home. This is just lack of communication and no precautions taken by the parent in case of an emergency. This blame game gets worse. The teachers have far more to do than be baby sitters.

What??? so your parents were there for you all hours of the day, does that mean none of your parents worked?, are you now suggesting that I should also stop workin, live on dole handouts, bring my daughter up to believe she should never work, all just to ensure I am home 1 hour earlier? My daughter does not wait until 9pm to see Mummy, my daughter see's mummy at 4:40 and then spends time with mummy until she goes to bed. I apologise to any parents this next comment may offend but i spend far more quality time with my child then some none working parents who pass their childrens care onto a video game or television

You are suggesting my child should have more sense & told the teachers Mummy wasnt home, well what about the teachers sense who know i work? or are you saying that a 10 year old should have more sense then a so called well educated adult?, how do i say this any clearer - THE SCHOOL told my daughter I WAS AT HOME as for the school baby sitting my daughter - She wasnt at school later because I couldnt be bothered to finish work or get someone to pick her up, or to be at home for her, she was at school later because the SCHOOL requested she stay later.

The lack of communication was the school who lacked to communicate with me about a change of plans. I had contacted the school in the morning to ask if my daughter would be staying late and was told YES she would be finishing at 4pm and to pick her up then

As for being it all being my fault why then did the school leadership sincerely apologise for THEIR neglect??????????????? and believe me if you ever met the head teacher you would know she does not apologise just for the sake of it. You can say whatever you like but at the end of the day the school accepted responsibility for their mistake, and I have accepted their apology.

But i get that you are just one of those people who doesnt care what facts are presented to you, nor do you care about what this thread is about, you are just one of those individuals who has to make themself feel better by tryin to put others down, well sorry to ruin your illusion of importance but i know im a good mother and I know who was at fault on that day!!!!!

Oh and No i dont allow my 10 year old daughter to go outside and play after dark

Just to take this slightly off topic: make sure that school have at least two contact numbers for you. Most now use an automated texting system, and no doubt it will be used if the weather deteriorates and schools are closed.

Hi thanks, but the school have my home, office & mobile number, my mothers home & mobile number and her fathers home & mobile number, and normally on any other occasion they have contacted my mobile number first as they know I am not always at home during the day

Off topic too but the schools system for informing you of school closure during the day is by facebook

Having read your earlier posts and your last ones, you said the school just sent your daughter home at 3pm, but you have then gone on to say that the school actually told your daughter you would be in. Which is just bare faced lying if they hadn't had any communications with you.
My point is, I know your daughter is only 10, but if she is usually collected from school, surly if she is just sent home, she may have noticed things being a bit odd.

Hi, well yes she did, but was told I would be at home waiting for her, and then told off for questioning the teacher (or being insolent in their words). Also the teacher did confirm to me that my daughter had told her this and was told off for arguing back. Some kids are picked up, some go home alone and obviously in a full school the teacher didnt know my daughter was usually picked up since she wasnt my daughters class teacher

Like I have said, the school and one of the people who's mistake it was has admitted full responsibility - The mix up was a new receptionist who actually left a message told the teacher that i had been given the message, then the misunderstanding took place, the teacher thought they had actually spoken to me and didnt realise it was just a message on the answermachine. but she did admit that she said i would be at home

This issue seems to have a esculated, with messages between school staff getting mixed up, I can understand your frustration that your daughter actually questioned this and was told off for it.
As a mother I can well understand the awful feeling of 'what if', if she had made it to your house and then no-one in.
I hope it has all being cleared up and situations like this don't happen again!

presumably this is the school who has a headteacher that runs not 1 but 2 schools, the other not being far away. my friend went to a parents meeting with others, she questioned the fact that parents are made to take children into school in infants rather than line up, that being no-one knows who are actually parents and therefore anybody could walk in., she was told to sit down and be quiet, as to which she refused and put to the head, god forbid but what if 1 of those adults was a sex offender, the children go to the toilet alone, and there's the sex offender lying in wait..to which the head replied . then on my head be it.. i found this disgusting, and couldn't believe someone carrying that responsibility could answer in this way.. and therefore I Salute you Nexusdee for persuing your complaint..

presumably this is the school who has a headteacher that runs not 1 but 2 schools, the other not being far away. my friend went to a parents meeting with others, she questioned the fact that parents are made to take children into school in infants rather than line up, that being no-one knows who are actually parents and therefore anybody could walk in., she was told to sit down and be quiet, as to which she refused and put to the head, god forbid but what if 1 of those adults was a sex offender, the children go to the toilet alone, and there's the sex offender lying in wait..to which the head replied . then on my head be it.. i found this disgusting, and couldn't believe someone carrying that responsibility could answer in this way.. and therefore I Salute you Nexusdee for persuing your complaint..

I must admit I am shocked at this and especially at the heads response as I have always been fully supportive of the head teacher & despite other found her extremely efficient and good at her job, but i can fully understand the dangers of the present arrangements and your friends rightful complaints.

One thing my own personal experience has done is to highligh the problems at both schools (unfortunately mine not been the only case and even worse not dealt with as serious mine was). Ask your friend to attend the parent/governor meetings (usually held once a month with a sign up - the head doesnt attend these as they are purely run by the parent governors to give parents the chance to have a voice) as the parent governors are no longer willing to just be numbers in votes now and will probably provide a better voice and hopefully start getting these much needed changed implemented

May I add that I have refused to allow my daughter to go on this trip which has resulted with a teacher from the school coming to my house demanding to know why I am not letting her go, and trying to persuade me to change my mind. Its not even an educational trip

Please please do not deny your daughter the opportunity to go on a residential trip. Educational or not these trips are vital to build self-esteem and confidence, and primarily to have fun.

On trips the staff are responsible 24/7. Please don't think they will up sticks at 3pm.

It sounds like the tuition had to be cancelled for one reason or another. My guess (and a guess) is that there are many child on the tuition list and not enough staff to cover them all in one week. Maybe another parent rang up and demanded their child has their session that week, forcing a teacher to cancel your child's session?

Not saying this is in your case, I am sure it's not, but alot of parents don't update there mobile phone numbers with schools. Sometimes its worth checking the correct details are at school, judging from your childs age I have no doubt they are correct, it's normally when older some parents don't bother.

Here we go again, The Blame Game. There was a time when parents were there for their kids at any time of the day. Not wait till 9 pm to see mummy when they are supposed to be in bed. That is the problem with society today. The school is not to blame. The child is ten years old. Are you trying to tell me that this is a child that is kept indoors all day never goes out to play, Has no friends in the area. That she was alone at school. That she did not have the sense to tell the teacher mum will not be home. This is just lack of communication and no precautions taken by the parent in case of an emergency. This blame game gets worse. The teachers have far more to do than be baby sitters.

Are you being deliberatly obtuse?

The OP has said several times that she has a system in place.

Her daughter was told by school to go home as her Mum would be at home, though they had no evidence to support this, and her daughter objected, but was told off for doing so.

The school are clearly at fault here and the OP is right to complain formally as a route to getting them to address what went wrong here and change procedures to ensure it doesn't happen again.

Personally I think teachers sign up to "looking after kids and doing their best to look after them" when they become teachers (mostly in primary though!)

In my primary school Ashdell, they were really careful about children going home alone without parents permission (ESPECIALLY because at the time, news of abductions in a white van had gone round)