As someone that, in the past, has been very hasty in dishing it out, I've always found that I only succeed in receiving it back, with no positive results. Do you not think that criticism is like a homing pigeon, and always comes back to you?

Of late, instead of criticising someone for whatever reason, I've tried to sit back and think.. Why are they doing it? Did they mean to do it.. Did they intend to cause frustration, or was it just a slip of the tongue.. a mistake?

People are always so quick to judge, but frown upon being judged.

If someone annoys you for doing something.. why not put yourself in their shoes, and try to understand what has pushed them into committing such actions? They're perhaps having a hard time at home or maybe just letting things get on top of them, maybe they struggled to sleep because of things on their minds, and its resulted in them behaving in a different manner?

People that just seem to nag and nag and nag.. Maybe they can't help it? Maybe one or both of their parents bickered and whined at them for every little thing when they were young, and it had a knock on effect to their outlook on life, their beliefs.. their intentions?

At work as a boss.. Do you not think that, instead of having a go and putting down someone for doing something wrong, you should try to understand why they did it.. and not coming across negatively may prevent it happening again?

I was reading a book.. and one of the examples was a high-ranked RAF pilot had to crash land his plane, because the engines ceased up mid-air. This was due to a junior engineer putting in the wrong fuel. What did the pilot do? They engineer was nearly in tears as the pilot approached the base.. but instead of shouting his mouth off, putting down the engineer, he put his arm around him and said "To show that I'm confident you won't make this mistake again, you're refuelling my jet tomorrow".

Sometimes you just have to take a breath when someone has frustrated you, relax.. Try to understand their actions, and react in a positive manner.. Only then will you get positive results.

GazB

Cant believe you're post is so long.....couldn't you have kept it shorter and more to the point? :hihi: :heyhey:

I guess the shortest way it can be summarised is.. "Don't worry, be happy" :D

Spot on Gaz. Some seem to take pleasure in whinging. I've just been bollocked by some pseudo-intellectual babe for daring to reply to a lighthearted thread about the Sheffield Council without forensically scrutinising the previous (admittedly few) posts for the answer.

Some people should try sniffing the fragrance of the weeds before they yank them up.

I was waiting on an 82 bus home from work the other night outside Virgin when I saw an elderly man stumble and fall in the street. Despite it being rush hour on a Friday a crowd of people hurried to help him so many infact people walked away because so many had got to him first, some people immediately picked him up while others collected his split belongings for him.

As the Bus pulled away their were still people helping this guy taking time to check his eyes for concussion.

To much of this forum is taking up with people moaning about the bad stuff they see in Sheffield I think we need to even it up with some good.

Originally posted by spartacus

Some people should try sniffing the fragrance of the weeds before they yank them up.

That, my man, is a very good saying.. Like it :thumbsup:

Originally posted by Disco_Cat

To much of this forum is taking up with people moaning about the bad stuff they see in Sheffield I think we need to even it up with some good.

My sentiments exactly.. But then I think, what is it that's making people be so negative? Are they insecure, have they been bullied in the past, have they had bad experiences of confronting people.. And now only feel up to criticising people over a public forum where there is no physical confrontation?

I try to understand what possesses people to act the way they do.. Sometimes it's easy to see, they simply can't help it or don't realise they're doing it.

So to all the people that have a negative outlook on life, that have had a hard time or are going through a rough patch.. To those that need their eyes opening to the true beauty of life..

Here's a big hug:

[Insert vacant hug smiley].

:)

true beauty of life?

you won the lottery or got a new girlfriend ? :suspect: :)

Neither. I'm not saying I have a perfect life, just one that I am generally happy and satisfied with :)

If I'm having a bad day, I try and not let it show, partly pride, but I don't like to take it out on anyone else, especially if you know them as it can escalate

As someone that, in the past, has been very hasty in dishing it out, I've always found that I only succeed in receiving it back, with no positive results. Do you not think that criticism is like a homing pigeon, and always comes back to you?

Of late, instead of criticising someone for whatever reason, I've tried to sit back and think.. Why are they doing it? Did they mean to do it.. Did they intend to cause frustration, or was it just a slip of the tongue.. a mistake?

People are always so quick to judge, but frown upon being judged.

If someone annoys you for doing something.. why not put yourself in their shoes, and try to understand what has pushed them into committing such actions? They're perhaps having a hard time at home or maybe just letting things get on top of them, maybe they struggled to sleep because of things on their minds, and its resulted in them behaving in a different manner?

People that just seem to nag and nag and nag.. Maybe they can't help it? Maybe one or both of their parents bickered and whined at them for every little thing when they were young, and it had a knock on effect to their outlook on life, their beliefs.. their intentions?

At work as a boss.. Do you not think that, instead of having a go and putting down someone for doing something wrong, you should try to understand why they did it.. and not coming across negatively may prevent it happening again?

I was reading a book.. and one of the examples was a high-ranked RAF pilot had to crash land his plane, because the engines ceased up mid-air. This was due to a junior engineer putting in the wrong fuel. What did the pilot do? They engineer was nearly in tears as the pilot approached the base.. but instead of shouting his mouth off, putting down the engineer, he put his arm around him and said "To show that I'm confident you won't make this mistake again, you're refuelling my jet tomorrow".

Sometimes you just have to take a breath when someone has frustrated you, relax.. Try to understand their actions, and react in a positive manner.. Only then will you get positive results.

GazB

Great post, GazB.

I think we should all try to be more like this.

StarSparkle

Edit: Oops, old post, but the sentiments still stand

I was thinking that the other day GazB - that too many people can only be negative. But oddly enough it makes them happier to be like that.... They probably only like to hear bad news happening to others.

Criticism often says more about the critic than it does about the criticized.

:)

Sometimes you just have to take a breath when someone has frustrated you, relax.. Try to understand their actions, and react in a positive manner.. Only then will you get positive results.
GazB

lovin your work guru gaz :D

Criticism often says more about the critic than it does about the criticized.

:)

This is spot on. Someone who constantly criticizes has something wrong with their personality in my opinion.They get into the habit of doing it ,at every opportunity, and their life is full of negativity.If you constantly criticise someone, you take away their confidence. Praise someone and you have a friend for life.

I am very critical of such people.

Ooh my post got resurrected :)

Considering I made this thread a week after my 20th birthday I reckon it was quite constructive! I sometimes slip into a negative frame of mind which can lead to being a bit of a critic but, wherever possible, I try to remain positive and treat people how I like to be treated myself.

An excellent post GazB showing much maturity, well done.

They are a pain in the patou

... are old fuddy duddies! :hihi:

Sometimes I do not understand the "constant-moaning-and-critising-anything-relating-to-our-tax" kind of culture. :rolleyes:

What if you struggle to act positively because your previous positive efforts haven't shown success and something recent has upset you. I hate to point out catch 22's but I don't think solutions like this are always available.

I criticise because invariably I hate most things and most people. Both of which frequently fail to live up to my expectations.

Everyone seems to think that the mundane is praiseworthy, it's not, the mundane is the bare minimum - That's the stuff which you're expected to do without seeking affirmation. If you were to excell and achieve a high standard then I'd be impressed. Just a spark of inspiration led genius will be enough to make you persona gratia.

You've gotta be pretty special to get under my radar. Innovate and bedazzle, be amazing.

I criticise because invariably I hate most things and most people. Both of which frequently fail to live up to my expectations.

Everyone seems to think that the mundane is praiseworthy, it's not, the mundane is the bare minimum - That's the stuff which you're expected to do without seeking affirmation. If you were to excell and achieve a high standard then I'd be impressed. Just a spark of inspiration led genius will be enough to make you persona gratia.

You've gotta be pretty special to get under my radar. Innovate and bedazzle, be amazing.


How about this for a post:

The astrological alignments are a little challenging at the moment, but wait for even more fireworks next year with Uranus doing his edge of chaos orbits

I don't care if I get criticised or carped at; just as well as a Mod. on here. :)

Take a look at this:

http://www.paradoxicalcommandments.com/

Scroll down to see the 'Commandments' themselves.

I try and adopt this approach. :)

I don't acre if I get criticised or carped at; just as well as a Mod. on here. :)

Take a look at this:

http://www.paradoxicalcommandments.com/

Scroll down to see the 'Commandments' themselves.

I try and adopt this approach. :)

The "commandments ring true for me also at the moment, as the old saying goes "you can't please all of the people all of the time" so just please yourself i reckon :D

I criticise because invariably I hate most things and most people. Both of which frequently fail to live up to my expectations.

Everyone seems to think that the mundane is praiseworthy, it's not, the mundane is the bare minimum - That's the stuff which you're expected to do without seeking affirmation. If you were to excell and achieve a high standard then I'd be impressed. Just a spark of inspiration led genius will be enough to make you persona gratia.

You've gotta be pretty special to get under my radar. Innovate and bedazzle, be amazing.

And you are?... :cool:

StarSparkle

I criticise because invariably I hate most things and most people. Both of which frequently fail to live up to my expectations.

Everyone seems to think that the mundane is praiseworthy, it's not, the mundane is the bare minimum - That's the stuff which you're expected to do without seeking affirmation. If you were to excell and achieve a high standard then I'd be impressed. Just a spark of inspiration led genius will be enough to make you persona gratia.

You've gotta be pretty special to get under my radar. Innovate and bedazzle, be amazing.
I rarely do this, but I've got to say that's an excellent post Swan_Vesta; I agree absolutely. Revel in your misanthropy. I know I do :D .

I stopped giving a crap what people think of me a long time ago.

If the Daily Mail readers think I'm a burden on teh State for being out of work and on benefits, that's their problem.

If them on sheff_chat hate me for whatever reason, then that too is their problem.

Anyone who doesn't like me can go and *ahem* perform adult acts on wool bearing farm animals.

Daily Mail>
Daily Mail>
Daily Mail>
Daily Mail>
Daily Mail>
Daily Mail>
Daily Mail>

Damn Rich - That record seems to be stuck again.

Hecate, Thank you. Misanthropy is the best course and certainly the truest as mankind ultimately disappoints.

StarSparkle: I'm a realistic misanthropist and a horrible cynic :)

I stopped giving a crap what people think of me a long time ago.

If the Daily Mail readers think I'm a burden on teh State for being out of work and on benefits, that's their problem.

If them on sheff_chat hate me for whatever reason, then that too is their problem.

Anyone who doesn't like me can go and *ahem* perform adult acts on wool bearing farm animals.

i think it bothers some people that those out of work can seemingly still enjoy the trappings of 'disposable income', buying/playing the latest computer games, going out to the pub, etc etc - there doesnt seem to be much to motivate people to work if they can do all these things without clocking in. 'Cake' and 'eat it' spring all too readily to mind, unfortunately.

i'd love to be able to spend money so freely. Unfortunately, after all my bills, council tax, and the rest, i just about have enough to get a cider or two at the weekends and thats it...mind you, working 40+ hours each week is pretty knackering, so i tend to turn in early these days:)

no offense, rich, but can you see where these people are coming from? I can...although if i could get away with the same, i would do it in a minute!

p.s i have never read the mail - its a vile publication.

Yesterday, i bumped into an aunty who i had'nt seen in ages. I used to spend all my school holidays at her house, and treat her sons ( my cousins ) as my brothers. She only said negative things, and was scathing about where i've just moved to. I love my new flat, the area, and my new neighbours. She really upset me for the rest of the afternoon, but i refused to be miserable, and just put it down to the fact that she may be having a bad time of late. After getting off the bus and walking home, i was more than pleasantly surprised by the potty, lovely old man upstairs, who was waiting for me to return, to give me an old saucepan stand, that i love to bits and have turned into a plant stand, and my boss at work sending me a beautiful bouquet of flowers for helping her do her job, which she said she couldnt do without me. If someone tries to make you miserable, dont pass it on. Every cloud has a silver lining.x