This is mainly a question for the older members.

If someone a lot younger than you tries to chat you up are you flattered or do you think they have an ulterior motive ?

It happened to me recently and I was very suspicious but my mate said I should just take it as a compliment.

Awww bless! You think it's surpising that someone younger might find you attractive?

(How much younger?)

Originally posted by nick2
This is mainly a question for the older members.

If someone a lot younger than you tries to chat you up are you flattered or do you think they have an ulterior motive ?

It happened to me recently and I was very suspicious but my mate said I should just take it as a compliment. your mate could be right, what do you think the ulterior motive may have been?

Originally posted by depoix
your mate could be right, what do you think the ulterior motive may have been?

well, when I was younger a lot of people tried to get off with older blokes to get their drinks bought all night.

(I suppose young women might try this too, I don't know)

Deavon - 16 years younger than me.

I've just checked you profile... judging by your date of birth it all seems perfectly legal:hihi:

If the man in question is attractive, I would say 'Go for it!'

Enjoy it. (And if it costs you a few drinks, so what? Young people tend to have less money on them, so it might just be a question of means.)

Originally posted by Deavon
If the man in question is attractive, I would say 'Go for it!'


I can't, I'm in a relationship (not that I'm complaining), but even if I wasn't I've always gone for people my own age, I think you have more in common that way.

Take it as a compliment - I'm only 28 but I still get that pleased feeling of "Oh, yeah! still got it baby!" when I get flirted with by the 18 - 25 set. I go home and tell the missus and she usually says something along the lines of "And did she have a golden retriever and a stick?".

Cheering for Nick removed after I saw the post above - Edited :D

I'd be flattered, but then I do do a lot of harmless flirting myself.

If it was a man chatting me up I'd tw@ him. :? :heyhey:

Originally posted by Don_Kiddick
If it was a man chatting me up I'd tw@ him. :? :heyhey:

He might be bigger than you :)

Originally posted by Don_Kiddick
I'd be flattered, but then I do do a lot of harmless flirting myself.

If it was a man chatting me up I'd tw@ him. :? :heyhey:

if a man were to chat you up you would tw@ him????
just shows mr Don_kiddick you are not entirley comfortable with your own sexuality :hihi: :hihi: :hihi:

Oooer matron :hihi:

Don rushes out to Virgin Vie shop,,,

I'd take it as a compliment......if it ever happened. :(

Awwwwww Mate!

I'm gutted for ya! :(

Interesting question this, can't say I've ever been that confident and have questioned motives. Linked to this (I think): did anyone see that programme on C4 last week about the 'Studs of Suburbia'? Apparently 'pulling' is all down to confidence. ;)

Originally posted by Cardinal
Apparently 'pulling' is all down to confidence. ;)

Most of it is, looks help, but confidence is more powerfull.

Okay then. Note to self: 'be more confident'!! ;)

Originally posted by Cardinal
Okay then. Note to self: 'be more confident'!! ;)

Storm into the pub, pick a woman you like and bellow (in style of Yul Bryner in "The King And I")

"YOU, WOMAN, JOIN ME FOR A DRINK."

And see what happens.

I wish I could claim not to be old enough to have seen/ remember the 'King and I' but alas not. I'll let you know how I get on with that strategy - unless you read about 'man punched by woman in pub chat up row'!! ;)

I've always looked quite a bit younger than I am, so if I do get flirted with, it's always by someone younger than me, usually a good few years younger.

It's very flattering, of course, and I do take it as a compliment, but if there's obviously a big age difference, it can feel a bit uncomfortable. I'm left thinking 'Why are you talking to me?'. It's a bit awkward, because I don't like to be rude and not reply to people.

StarSparkle

Originally posted by nick2
bellow (in style of Yul Bryner in "The King And I")

Remember that Mrs Anna expected the King to provide her with a house of her very own, and they'd only just met. Could be a pretty expensive round. :(

i once went out with a guy twelve years older than me. he did a lot of chasing me as i was in another relationship at the time. we did have quite a lot in common despite the age gap (i think this was my maturity balanced against his immaturity). although it was never a problem at first - his biggest issue was that i would find someone my own age, who i would have more in common with, who wouldn't have any baggage (he had a ten year old). we were together for four years and would have been nearly married by now if he hadn't have cheated - apparently because he thought i was ?!?!?!

i think relationships with an age gap can really work as long as you are both comfortable with it.

getting chatted up by someone younger when i'm out doesn't bother me and i feel flattered ! i lie about my age anyway because i look younger than i actually am !

Originally posted by the_rudeboy
I'd take it as a compliment......if it ever happened. :(

i'd just take it, owts better than nowt.

I'd take it as a compliment if it ever happened, but i dont think it ever would happen to me, as ive been told that i look older than i am, from the age of 12 i looked old enough to get in to pubs which was a bonus.... but now im 35 im not too chuffed as i once was...:rolleyes: as for the age factor i cant see why age should be a barrier if two people like each other..... as long as its legal :D

Originally posted by nick2
Storm into the pub, pick a woman you like and bellow (in style of Yul Bryner in "The King And I")

"YOU, WOMAN, JOIN ME FOR A DRINK."

And see what happens.

I've got the shaved head :hihi:

I should take it as a compliment, it takes all types Nick.

I personally have a thing for older women.

no personal experience of this but I can't see what is wrong with it. I think some people have a hang up about age in relationships. It's who you fancy that matters not what it says on their birth certificate. hope this helps.:|

Being 'chatted up' is an ego boost for most people, doesn't matter whether the person doing the chatting up is older or younger, just enjoy it as a bit of harmless fun.

Would you be flattered if it was by a person of the same sex?.....obviously i'm only asking the straight forummers.

Originally posted by the_rudeboy
Would you be flattered if it was by a person of the same sex?.....obviously i'm only asking the straight forummers.

A similar question, Why don't blokes ever compliment each other ?

You hear woman all the time saying "I like your hair", "you look nice in that dress", etc, but blokes just don't do anything like that.

Originally posted by the_rudeboy
Would you be flattered if it was by a person of the same sex?.....obviously i'm only asking the straight forummers.

Erm, Been approached a few times and I took it as a compliment.

I'm confident in my own sexuality not to get freaked out by it - I look at it that it's just someone who fancied me and it's nice to know I'm not a complete troglodyte :thumbsup: .

Originally posted by nick2
A similar question, Why don't blokes ever compliment each other ?

You hear woman all the time saying "I like your hair", "you look nice in that dress", etc, but blokes just don't do anything like that.

Because the way most hetrosexual male brains work is "Arrrgh! He said I look good in these jeans....... He must be a rampant gay intent on forcing himself on me!". It's not the case of course, but that's they way it behaves.

well. I look at it this way. young ladies are more than welcome to come my way whenether they like:)

I'm more than happy to go out with an 18 year old girl
:D

In all seriousness I work with a lot of 17-22 year olds and go out with them a bit and there doesn't seekm to be a great deal of real difference caused by the age gap.

Originally posted by Swan_Vesta
Erm, Been approached a few times and I took it as a compliment.

I'm confident in my own sexuality not to get freaked out by it - I look at it that it's just someone who fancied me and it's nice to know I'm not a complete troglodyte :thumbsup: .

Never experienced it.........but think i'd be ok & take it as a compliment.

Originally posted by nick2
A similar question, Why don't blokes ever compliment each other ?

You hear woman all the time saying "I like your hair", "you look nice in that dress", etc, but blokes just don't do anything like that.

Me and my mates do sometimes if we think it.

Girls tend to respond well to compliments so they seem to boost one another sometimes IMO.

Are you having an identity crisis nick2 ?

Originally posted by venger
Me and my mates do sometimes if we think it.

Girls tend to respond well to compliments so they seem to boost one another sometimes IMO.

Are you having an identity crisis nick2 ?
We too Venger.

Just because we do doesn't mean we want a night out up Brown Street. :hihi:
Trouble is other folk have this thing where they have to presume that you do.
OR if you don't you have a crisis with your sexuality..

Can't win really. {shrugs}

However, to add my thought's to the rudeboy when he asked
Would you be flattered if it was by a person of the same sex?.....obviously i'm only asking the straight forummers. I know I said I'd tw@ them previously - that was actually Don-comedy... I probably wouldn't.

I suppose on one count it could be flattering but, persistant coming-onto would result in a situation.

It's not that I have 'problems' it's just that I am normal.

It's not a crime, denial or a disability - it's there to be celebrated!

I call myself diverse these days: I'm white, male, heterosexual, married (kid born more than 9 months after wedding), no previous marriages, no previous kids, in full time legal employment, non-illicit drug taking, reasonably healthy, Professional career despite a Comprehensive education in Dinnington.

Not many of us left in England these days.
I'm a minority. :thumbsup:

Originally posted by venger
Are you having an identity crisis nick2 ?

I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.

Originally posted by nick2
I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.

Well, unless you are trying to attract the younger crowd by wearing hawaiian shirts and growing a pony tail, I wouldn't be too concerned.

Originally posted by liencam
Well, unless you are trying to attract the younger crowd by wearing hawaiian shirts and growing a pony tail, I wouldn't be too concerned.

I have got a Hawaiian shirt, but I would NEVER have a pony-tail.

Originally posted by nick2
I have got a Hawaiian shirt, but I would NEVER have a pony-tail.

Cheap convertable car?

Originally posted by liencam
Cheap convertable car?

I would prefer an Audi A8

Originally posted by Lee1979
getting chatted up by someone younger when i'm out doesn't bother me and i feel flattered ! i lie about my age anyway because i look younger than i actually am !

It bothers me!!!!!!!! ;)

anyway -im the toyboy in this relationship arn't i :D :D

Originally posted by nick2
I would prefer an Audi A8

As long as you don't have one I wouldn't say you are having a mid-life crisis.

Originally posted by liencam
As long as you don't have one I wouldn't say you are having a mid-life crisis.

Phew !

Thanks doc.

Originally posted by StarSparkle
I've always looked quite a bit younger than I am, so if I do get flirted with, it's always by someone younger than me, usually a good few years younger.

My girlfriend looks a bit younger than she is, she's constantly getting chatted up by 13 year olds, and everybody always asks me if going out with her is legal! :loopy:

12....pmsl

Originally posted by Deavon
Awww bless! You think it's surpising that someone younger might find you attractive?

(How much younger?)

Originally posted by nick2
Phew !

Thanks doc.

You're welcome, but I feel I should tell you I'm not qualified.

Originally posted by liencam
You're welcome, but I feel I should tell you I'm not qualified.

Really!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? ;)

I am 37 later this year and recently got chatted up by a 21 year old and a 20 year old .(not at the same time I may add!!) I was extremely flattered I can tell you!

The 21 year old is very immature for his age and looks and acts more like a 14 year old.

The 20 year old is a damn good looking young man but that's where the problem lies, he is too young. I have never been interested in younger men, much prefering men my own age or older.

These lads are more my daughter ages than mine and she has a huge crush on one of them so it's a definate no no.

Having said all that, it was a big boost to my flagging almost middle aged ego!!