Im in a foul mood right now! :rant:

Ive just come off the phone after speaking to a 'family member' is all i'll call it right now! Bleeting on about her great life, how its all so frigging good, like I really care? And anyone reading this will care! So I said yeah well life isnt looking too good for me at the moment because of X, X and X. The reply wasnt something like 'Yeah well, anyway....' erm fuming at this point, calls me to go on about their oh so perfect life but doesnt listen to anything ive got to say until I mention I might be fostering a dog for a rescue. This stupid, ignorant cow starts asking about 'said dog' well tbh with you all, I dont know what dog I might be fostering hence going to RR kennels this weekend to meet some of the dogs there, and also seeing some more at a later date. I said the chances are i'll be fostering a staff because theres so many around so probably 9/10 chances it'll be a staff. Oh well, you'd never guessed it - if I DARE to bring a staff into my household (what with 2, soon to be 3, cats and a toddler) i'll be reported to social services by her for neglecting my child and putting him in danger! Im fuming! How the frick am I putting my son in danger? Im fostering a dog, to help it out, and helping a charity out, and also help myself out (Really down atm and I know a dog would give me 'get up and go', as I cant rescue a dog on a perm basis fostering looks like a really good thing for us all) But she just cut into me when I said 'Theres a few that might suit us, but going to look at a rescue kennels to see some, chances are it'll be a staff' she didnt give me chance to say anything before informing me she'd be as spiteful to report me. Im in shock, and im fuming.

Firstly, when telling her about my doctors appts and medication im on. How ive been feeling. Whats happening with my life, she doesnt give a crap. Then suddenly gives a s**t about me, my son, my lifestyle choices when I say this. Needless to say I put the phone down and text her this..

'Do a google search, or Yahoo if youre not common enough to use google! See that staffs are NOT dangerous. Its NOT the breed you fricking fool, its how a dog is handled, brought up. If I want to bring a dog into my house then I will. It has nothing to do with you, my friends or the world to be honest. Go ahead, ill text you when I foster so you can report me. I can assure you, i'll go to great lengths to get you done for wasting SS's time and money and resources. Goodbye, and dont bother getting in touch'

And as im typing this, someone else has called me and told me I must say sorry to her. Well like hell I will! If im grown up enough to care for my child, working at great lengths to save my relationship from going tits up, keeping my house running, starting college to get myself a decent career, aswell as battling depression and stress related panic attacks then im pretty damn sure im grown up enough to bring a dog into my household and nuture it to become a sweet dog that will be used to a toddler and not be frightened. Be used to cats and not go into attack mode or even scared mode. Be used to a house where there is people in and out. Be crate trained. Lead trained. Toilet trained. And have a healthy weight and be a superb dog for anyone looking for a forever for it!

Seriously, im sorry this goes on I just needed it to get off my chest. And rant :( :( :(

You did right to rant hun - just rise above her - i think its a family thing with the holier than thou attitude lol honestly let her report you and then when the social services warn her (thats if they take it seriously "oh im reporting her cause she has a staffy")

Dont let her get to you honestly - your better :) (hugs)

ignore her, let her report you, they won`t even take her seriously, evn if they did call on you, you know your agood mum and your kids are healthy and cared for x

I know that they wouldnt take her seriously, but because of ongoing work with the doctors/health visitors and I have been reported before (Lived at my mums, some eejit reported me for not having suitable sleeping conditions at my mums but was given 'the all clear' on that!) it does scare me a little. I know they wouldnt be able to do much but its just the thought of having SS yet again on me. I had them when I was preg too for my age, got questioned in the hosp by them.. So its the fact that shes using that against me aswell as the same old 'Staffs are dangerous' line. I just dont understand some people - why would she not want me to help a dog out? That might also help me out! Shes apparantly an 'animal lover' but makes me think if she really is. I want to take all my anger out on her right now!!!

you would only do more trouble taking your anger out on her, she'll use it against you in the long run. As mad as you are YOU know your not doing anything wrong and if she did decide to call SS nothing would come by it cause it has been done out of spite, not a genuine concern.

Couldnt you just call SS yourself and say my sisters probably going to contact you in the next week or so, i'm fostering a dog for a while and for whatever reason she sees it fit to report me. I dont know how SS work as the last time i knew of them was when i was 4. maybe that way you can bypass any crap from her end and she'd be reallly embarrassed when they give her a stern word.

Typical of a family member, isnt it?

When I said we were getting a puppy my mum said "What with 4 kids? You must be mad?". You'd have thought we were getting a pit bull not a Yorkie.

Take no notice. If you are battling depression a dog is the best thing for it.

Staffs are dangerous... but by that logic so is everydog from a great dane down to a chiuaha (however the hell you spell it).

I know its not funny to you and i fully understand you getting annoyed because i would have gone mad at a comment like that. But what i do find funny is that people are so quick to blame the dog but the dog isn't born dangerous...it is made dangerous by the way it is brought up. How people can say you are neglecting your kids by owning a staff is beyond me.

If staffs=neglected kids then countless thousands of honest decent people (you among them) should be up on a charge! Its absolutely ridiculous that anyone can be so narrow minded. Staffs are dogs like any other, they are a victim of their reputation which has been earned by people disrespecting and neglecting the breed and what its about.

Ignore her, get your staffie and enjoy it! :D Hell get two!

Im in a foul mood right now! :rant:

Ive just come off the phone after speaking to a 'family member' is all i'll call it right now! Bleeting on about her great life, how its all so frigging good, like I really care? And anyone reading this will care! So I said yeah well life isnt looking too good for me at the moment because of X, X and X. The reply wasnt something like 'Yeah well, anyway....' erm fuming at this point, calls me to go on about their oh so perfect life but doesnt listen to anything ive got to say until I mention I might be fostering a dog for a rescue. This stupid, ignorant cow starts asking about 'said dog' well tbh with you all, I dont know what dog I might be fostering hence going to RR kennels this weekend to meet some of the dogs there, and also seeing some more at a later date. I said the chances are i'll be fostering a staff because theres so many around so probably 9/10 chances it'll be a staff. Oh well, you'd never guessed it - if I DARE to bring a staff into my household (what with 2, soon to be 3, cats and a toddler) i'll be reported to social services by her for neglecting my child and putting him in danger! Im fuming! How the frick am I putting my son in danger? Im fostering a dog, to help it out, and helping a charity out, and also help myself out (Really down atm and I know a dog would give me 'get up and go', as I cant rescue a dog on a perm basis fostering looks like a really good thing for us all) But she just cut into me when I said 'Theres a few that might suit us, but going to look at a rescue kennels to see some, chances are it'll be a staff' she didnt give me chance to say anything before informing me she'd be as spiteful to report me. Im in shock, and im fuming.

Firstly, when telling her about my doctors appts and medication im on. How ive been feeling. Whats happening with my life, she doesnt give a crap. Then suddenly gives a s**t about me, my son, my lifestyle choices when I say this. Needless to say I put the phone down and text her this..

'Do a google search, or Yahoo if youre not common enough to use google! See that staffs are NOT dangerous. Its NOT the breed you fricking fool, its how a dog is handled, brought up. If I want to bring a dog into my house then I will. It has nothing to do with you, my friends or the world to be honest. Go ahead, ill text you when I foster so you can report me. I can assure you, i'll go to great lengths to get you done for wasting SS's time and money and resources. Goodbye, and dont bother getting in touch'

And as im typing this, someone else has called me and told me I must say sorry to her. Well like hell I will! If im grown up enough to care for my child, working at great lengths to save my relationship from going tits up, keeping my house running, starting college to get myself a decent career, aswell as battling depression and stress related panic attacks then im pretty damn sure im grown up enough to bring a dog into my household and nuture it to become a sweet dog that will be used to a toddler and not be frightened. Be used to cats and not go into attack mode or even scared mode. Be used to a house where there is people in and out. Be crate trained. Lead trained. Toilet trained. And have a healthy weight and be a superb dog for anyone looking for a forever for it!

Seriously, im sorry this goes on I just needed it to get off my chest. And rant :( :( :(

cats and kids are nice to have, but reading between the lines here i feel that by adding in a dog to the equation you seem to be creating a smokescreen to avoid dealing with some problems in your life.
friends we can choose, family we are born into and often family members feel they have a right to bully you.
as someone who has occasional spells of anxiety and depression i know how hard it is not to develop tunnel vision as a way of avoiding dealing with things.
your first responsibility is to yourself and your child, pets last but a few years, children will last the rest of your lifetime so they are a lasting investment and will (hopefully) support you in later years.
firstly, put the dog on hold because the less baggage you have to lug around, the better and, importantly, its hard to get suitable accommodation when you have pets.
secondly, a relationship is a sharing experience, you have to be equal partners and take it in turns to wear the trousers. that way you both get what you want without upsetting the other person.
if it is a one sided relationship it is as good as over, and will be when the other person decides to move on - they are making sure that your self esteem is kept so low that you are too frightened to end it yourself and move on. you have to rise above this and end it when you decide you are ready to move on, then do it positively. kids need bringing up in a non confrontational environment, not the jeremy kyle studios.
money worries can bring down the most loving relationships -deal with them- get help to do so. carve out unnecessary expenses like extra mouths to feed.

some breeds and cross breeds can be unpredictable. the pictures of injuries sustained by people and children by "friendly" pets are horrendous, and those are just the survivors. be careful when choosing, you may forgive the dog if it attacks your child, but your child and the authorities will not.
before you rescue a dog - rescue yourself!
good luck.

Good for you!!!! *hugs* this person is so ill informed its untrue every dog i have had have been staffie crosses and they make fantastic dogs! my little nanny dogs :)

Spare us the armchair psychology Muckymurphy.

cats and kids are nice to have, but reading between the lines here i feel that by adding in a dog to the equation you seem to be creating a smokescreen to avoid dealing with some problems in your life.
friends we can choose, family we are born into and often family members feel they have a right to bully you.
as someone who has occasional spells of anxiety and depression i know how hard it is not to develop tunnel vision as a way of avoiding dealing with things.
your first responsibility is to yourself and your child, pets last but a few years, children will last the rest of your lifetime so they are a lasting investment and will (hopefully) support you in later years.
firstly, put the dog on hold because the less baggage you have to lug around, the better and, importantly, its hard to get suitable accommodation when you have pets.
secondly, a relationship is a sharing experience, you have to be equal partners and take it in turns to wear the trousers. that way you both get what you want without upsetting the other person.
if it is a one sided relationship it is as good as over, and will be when the other person decides to move on - they are making sure that your self esteem is kept so low that you are too frightened to end it yourself and move on. you have to rise above this and end it when you decide you are ready to move on, then do it positively. kids need bringing up in a non confrontational environment, not the jeremy kyle studios.
money worries can bring down the most loving relationships -deal with them- get help to do so. carve out unnecessary expenses like extra mouths to feed.

some breeds and cross breeds can be unpredictable. the pictures of injuries sustained by people and children by "friendly" pets are horrendous, and those are just the survivors. be careful when choosing, you may forgive the dog if it attacks your child, but your child and the authorities will not.
before you rescue a dog - rescue yourself!
good luck.

Ever heard of PAT??? Dogs can provide alot of reassurance and love, they can calm you down and show you they care when you are upset, you can talk to them without back chat or fear ofback stabbing. They are loyal and can help a person - especially with anxietys - in so many ways.

So instead of paying a shrink £500 for a couple of sessions of feel good talk...some people prefer to kmake a friend for life...

Best treatment I ever had for my problems was my dogs, made me feel far better and gave me more purpose than any doctor. Dont listen to you "family". The saying is true you cant pick em!

Ever heard of PAT??? Dogs can provide alot of reassurance and love, they can calm you down and show you they care when you are upset, you can talk to them without back chat or fear ofback stabbing. They are loyal and can help a person - especially with anxietys - in so many ways.

So instead of paying a shrink £500 for a couple of sessions of feel good talk...some people prefer to kmake a friend for life...

er...no. what is PAT ? i didnt mention paying a shrink. and, how many animals should gina own before she finds inner peace? she already has two cats.

I've known people have lots of animals!!! I know you didnt but its what people expect. PAT is Pets and Therapy.
http://www.petsastherapy.org/
ALOT of people find comfort in pets, why is wrong if the animals are getting what they need and she is happy?

er...no. what is PAT ? i didnt mention paying a shrink. and, how many animals should gina own before she finds inner peace? she already has two cats.

wow thats TONNES of pets :rolleyes:

cats and kids are nice to have, but reading between the lines here i feel that by adding in a dog to the equation you seem to be creating a smokescreen to avoid dealing with some problems in your life.
friends we can choose, family we are born into and often family members feel they have a right to bully you.
as someone who has occasional spells of anxiety and depression i know how hard it is not to develop tunnel vision as a way of avoiding dealing with things.
your first responsibility is to yourself and your child, pets last but a few years, children will last the rest of your lifetime so they are a lasting investment and will (hopefully) support you in later years.
firstly, put the dog on hold because the less baggage you have to lug around, the better and, importantly, its hard to get suitable accommodation when you have pets.
secondly, a relationship is a sharing experience, you have to be equal partners and take it in turns to wear the trousers. that way you both get what you want without upsetting the other person.
if it is a one sided relationship it is as good as over, and will be when the other person decides to move on - they are making sure that your self esteem is kept so low that you are too frightened to end it yourself and move on. you have to rise above this and end it when you decide you are ready to move on, then do it positively. kids need bringing up in a non confrontational environment, not the jeremy kyle studios.
money worries can bring down the most loving relationships -deal with them- get help to do so. carve out unnecessary expenses like extra mouths to feed.

some breeds and cross breeds can be unpredictable. the pictures of injuries sustained by people and children by "friendly" pets are horrendous, and those are just the survivors. be careful when choosing, you may forgive the dog if it attacks your child, but your child and the authorities will not.
before you rescue a dog - rescue yourself!
good luck.

who is this person? seriously! Gina, I'm sure you know yourself better than anyone and if you know that a dog is the right move then who is anyone to question it! Plus, its a foster dog so its not a permanent fixture anyway and if my understanding is correct, any unforseen vets bills are covered by the rescue so Muckymurphy can stop whittling about expenses. And who said anything about accommodation or equal partnerships or Jeremy Kyle????

Chin up Gina.....your friends on here are behind you all the way! :)

I think you should just ignore your family member. What right have they to pass judgement on you?. They need to 'get a life'.

*Completly bypasses Muckymurphys reply as proper confusing*

Thank you guys, I know a dog will help me with the depression and stuff. Even the doctor recommended dogsitting and fostering is the next best thing, right? I wont struggle with the costs, the rescue will meet all vet treatment (but if I can afford the treatment, ill get it done) and whats some dog food each day if it speeds up my process to 'getting better'? If it helps out a rescue by giving it kennel space, and socializing one of their dogs? Personally 2 cats isnt alot. They are barely 'seen' anyway, they eat they sleep they go out. Even 3, which its going to be soon, it wont be exactly having 10+. Im absolutly, gutted that majority of my family seem to think I should say sorry for the text, but im not sorry, I dont think myself that I should be sorry. She is completely misinformed about the breed of dog, about me and my life and alot of other things to be fair. She was the one, who didnt speak to me until my son was a few months old. I dont know where her bloody so called morals have come from though!

Im going to sit back, get on with my life, helping others out and if she reports me, ill gladly let any authority into my home and they can see its clean (Ok not immaculate but whos house is with pets and a toddler?) and they can see my son, and my animals, are very well cared for. I still am seething over this, I want to explode into a fit of ranting but I know it'll get me nowhere. All it'll do is give her, immature cow, what she wanted.

:)

Who does she think she is to be able to stand in judgement of you?? I'd be seething too!

You're taking a very positive step towards helping an abandoned dog, yourself and, as a result of a happier you, your family.

I don't think you should apologise either. In fact I'd be the one expecting an apology.

*Completly bypasses Muckymurphys reply as proper confusing*

Thank you guys, I know a dog will help me with the depression and stuff. Even the doctor recommended dogsitting and fostering is the next best thing, right? I wont struggle with the costs, the rescue will meet all vet treatment (but if I can afford the treatment, ill get it done) and whats some dog food each day if it speeds up my process to 'getting better'? If it helps out a rescue by giving it kennel space, and socializing one of their dogs? Personally 2 cats isnt alot. They are barely 'seen' anyway, they eat they sleep they go out. Even 3, which its going to be soon, it wont be exactly having 10+. Im absolutly, gutted that majority of my family seem to think I should say sorry for the text, but im not sorry, I dont think myself that I should be sorry. She is completely misinformed about the breed of dog, about me and my life and alot of other things to be fair. She was the one, who didnt speak to me until my son was a few months old. I dont know where her bloody so called morals have come from though!

Im going to sit back, get on with my life, helping others out and if she reports me, ill gladly let any authority into my home and they can see its clean (Ok not immaculate but whos house is with pets and a toddler?) and they can see my son, and my animals, are very well cared for. I still am seething over this, I want to explode into a fit of ranting but I know it'll get me nowhere. All it'll do is give her, immature cow, what she wanted.

:)

Well done for ignoring madmurphy's post, s/he obviously hasn't even bothered to read your post properly, or they would have realised you were talking about fostering and not having a permanent dog!!

It's easy to see who got the brains in your family - it certainly wasn't your sister, who sounds a right cow.

Dogs do help with depression - there are time when I could spend the whole day just slumped on the sofa, but the damn dog's there with the big, brown eyes and dejected look, so I have to get up and take him out. Sometimes I think, well, I'll take him out for 20 minutes, that'll do, but once I'm out in the fresh(ish) air, I usually find that we end up having a decent walk and I feel so much better for it.

I had Staffies for years, they're lovely dogs, great temperament, especially with children. And I had cats - guess who ruled the house?? It certainly wasn't the dogs.:hihi:

do you know what i would tell them to shove their apology ware the sun doesnt shine
& well done you for taking on a foster dog staffy or no staffy
me of all people hated staffies & pit bulls due to a horrible attack
on my guide dog witch was provoked
but i have come to realise its not the dog its the owners
you sound like a very responsible dog owner you go for it
im sure what you decide will be for the best
& its true you can chose your friends but your family im afraid
that's a different story
that's why i don't talk to mine
keep us updated with what you decide to do
don't let ignorant people make your mind up for you :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

I'm with you 100% on the animal fostering being a helpful thing emotionally- why else would my house be a permanent trip hazard created by kittens by the dozen? The toughest thing with fostering is letting them go though, so do be careful.

Dogs are definitely great for social issues- taking a dog out in a popular spot guarantees you some exercise, fresh air, a sense of purpose and other people doing similar with whom to share a quick exchange of pleasantries.

As long as you take the precautions to make sure that Charlie is safe and that he's never left alone with a dog then everyone else can just take their unwanted opinions elsewhere.

My partner got alot of strength from his Whippet Tessa. He suffers anxiety and also had depression and she helped him through it, he was so sad to let her go but she had given him a new lease of life.

He's been suffering again recently, think its due the amount of change the stress from in-laws and general wearing down i think the new member to the family is going to help us both when we get stressed and upset.

Yours doing a wonderful thing Gina and if ever you want to blow off steam i have said it to people before i am nearly always free for a chat and a cuppa (athough as i've warned others i have a tendency of chatting the hours away lol) Dont let your family pull you down , know you have friends to support you and people on the forum to reassure you.

I hope fostering goes well and you never know the dog you foster may be absolutely perfect for you and your family.

really really don't mean to be a grump with this one but I really feel that adding a dog may add to your problems!!!!! sorry chic. stress can be a huge trigger/influence to any mental health problem. trust me I know. I am mental health nurse and have suffered quite bad depression. trick is..keep it simple!!! keep your life simple so you don't have too much to worry about..I totally agree that animals help with such conditions however I do feel that the responsibility of looking after them and involving them in your family can add more stress....why don't you offer to be a dog walker at a rescue centre so you can spend time with animals and not have to deal with the rehabilitation and the responsibility...sorry if spelling pants, I am dyclecsic...bleedin el can't even spell that right!!!LOL

Ermmm not sure if that was aimed at me or gina lol.

I have no mental health problems (although i am a bit mental) i do think it'd do my partner good to spend some time going out for walks and just clearing his mind cause thatshis main problem...(thats in case it was aimed at me lol)

As for Gina - i think you really need to write down the pros and cons and then you can really say well i did think about it and i know that its going to benefit me, then people will see you've really really thought about it (im not saying you havent)

sorry if I have offended when I say "mental Health" problems!!! really didn't mean to. I have had "mental health" problems because I suffered severe depression so it's a term I use and feel very comfortable with..sorry to offend....point is I agree than animals can really really help..lots of research supports this..however the resp of caring for them and meeting their needs can be stressful...thus me suggesting being a vol dog walker...

lol i dont think anyones going to take offence with it hun, i honestly just didnt know if it was aimed at me or not.

My only problem is my anxiety when left on my own. With my partner looking for work i know im going to be on my own with my daughter alot. I was burgled several times when i was younger and since then have developed a kind of fear of being left alone. My dads and his then partner had a border collie and when i was left on my own or babysitting he made me feel so safe. Im alot better with it these days for my daughters sake but the company of a canine friend would be very appreciated...

Not only that but i NEEEED to lose a few pounds and i know i'll have the get up and go to take her to the park every day, i've got a few to chose from and it'd do my daughter great...with summer coming up it'll be perfect.

We've written up a pros and cons list and the pros FAR outweight the cons...

I have 10 cats and a Staffie i must need reporting to then !! i have asthma bronciectosis and copd . and have been on itc . you live how u wanna live Gina coz its sod all to do with anyone else !! tc hun xx

there is always going to be someone who isn't happy with what you are doing
its up to you whether you let it bother you or not :suspect:

i wouldnt appologise either..some people are manipulative especially family members..trick is not to tell them too much.not only that if you have depression and anxiety some people dont understand and are insensitive to it,she sounds like shes trying to pull you down.i suffer myself from mental health problems and have 3 dogs a staffy is included in there.there the most loving dog and not at all nasty i know hes my second staffy ive owned.its people that handle them and how their treated thats the prob, not the dog.ignore your family member and stand up for yourself. good luck to you.

its the same with all dogs isnt it teenyweeny, they all can have the ability to be nasty horrible dogs. But with the right love, training and affection they can be excellent dogs. My cousin-in-law has staffies and they were fantastic with her children, her kids are now older think ones 16 others 18 but might have got that wrong, and they've never bit her kids.
i personallly wouldnt have a staffy but its cause i wouldnt know hot to handle the breed.

If you want a dog whatever breed it may be, do it, dont listen to what your family said,.

I know where people are coming from when saying it could make it worse but, im willing to give it a shot because if it does make it worse - ive arranged that if I need to the dog can go back into kennels. Obviously, I dont want a dog to go back to kennels but if it makes my health worse then I need to do whats right for me, and a dog.

Theres no need for anyone to worry about Charlie been left alone with any dog, I just wouldnt do it, too many horror stories around about children that have been attacked. I wouldnt leave him around any breed of dog, regardless of if the dogs a staffy, or a lab or a king charles. Just wouldnt do it. Afterall, my son is my life and I think, personally, adding a dog to our house would help us both out, it'd give me that 'get up and go' and it'd get Charlie more fresh air than hes currently getting. Might also help with his walking, he's struggling slightly with walking for long distances without a break in his buggy. But he is only 2, just.

Just to say though, this 'family member' isnt my sister dont know if ive accidently said it is but its not lol my sister uses this forum and I wouldnt be ranting about her on here if it was her :lol: Its just a female member, whos close but not that close. Shes never agreed to anything ive done. I had my son - she didnt like it. I got my own place - she didnt like it. I found out I was pregnant again - she didnt like it. I had a MC - she never said a word to me other than muttered 'Thank god'. But i'll prove her wrong, even if I just have the one foster dog from now until September, its still one dog that would have been in kennels. With regards to been a dog walker - well im going this weekend, and aiming at making it a weekly thing. Hopefully, my 'foster' if he/she comes from kennels can go back and see his/her 'mates' each week :) I know that the rescue has got a dog, currently in foster, lined up for me so maybe that dog will suit my house better than a different dog? Who knows yet, because I dont.

one thing my guide dog trainer said to me
you only hear about staffies , rotties , g s d ,etc
biting or attacking a child
you never hear about the other dogs like a golden retrever
or a Labrador etc attacking or biting a child
because people give the staffies , rotties , g s d ,etc
respect on the chance that they can bite or attack
but never give the same back for golden retriever or a Labrador etc
because they expect them to be good with kids
but when push comes to shove ANY dog can bite or attack
& i have never forgot that what she has said ;) :)

Nothing says that you have to spend time talking to family members. I get the impression that she's not a direct relation anyway. So just don't talk to her, let her get on with her perfect life and you get on with yours. I hope you find a dog that's right for you, even if it's just fostering for a short while.

Thank you guys, I know a dog will help me with the depression and stuff.


You're almost certainly wrong. If two cats are not improving your depression by being wonderful pets, I don't see how a dog is going to do the trick either.

That said, by far the best pet to have around if you want some loving attention, is a ferret.

You're almost certainly wrong. If two cats are not improving your depression by being wonderful pets, I don't see how a dog is going to do the trick either.

That said, by far the best pet to have around if you want some loving attention, is a ferret.

Theyre not wonderful pets! I never said they were - they eat, drink, go to sleep and go out. Theyre not wonderful pets - okay theyre loyal and *sometimes* come for a cuddle. But, they dont need regular walking, I dont have to get out of bed for them. Well, I do, but I dont have to get dressed for them, or go out and face the world for them each day do I? Dont get me wrong, I love them to bits, theyre my babies but I dont exactly have to motivate myself for them.



And thank you cyclone :)

You're almost certainly wrong. If two cats are not improving your depression by being wonderful pets, I don't see how a dog is going to do the trick either.

That said, by far the best pet to have around if you want some loving attention, is a ferret. My bold

Well, dogs have done the trick for me (http://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/showpost.php?p=6034737&postcount=20)!

Dogs and cats are completely different beasts when it comes to how much care they need. Owning a cat isn't a big deal, you feed it, get a cat flap, let it an and out, but it's largely independent. A dog on the other hand is completely reliant on you.

My dogs drive me insane at times, but it's oh so worth it when you come home and they're ALWAYS pleased to see you, you can cuddle them when you feel down, and they do give you a reason to get out n about. Chin up chick :) xx

Theyre not wonderful pets! I never said they were - they eat, drink, go to sleep and go out. Theyre not wonderful pets - okay theyre loyal and *sometimes* come for a cuddle. But, they dont need regular walking, I dont have to get out of bed for them. Well, I do, but I dont have to get dressed for them, or go out and face the world for them each day do I? Dont get me wrong, I love them to bits, theyre my babies but I dont exactly have to motivate myself for them.


I'm afriad that in most cases of depression, the same still applies. People who are too depressed to motivate themselves for their own sake most often end up not walking their newly-acquired dog, precisely because they are too depressed.

Of course this is a minor point if you're fostering, because whether it does you any good or not, at least you're doing something that is good for the dog. For that you should be praised.

My dogs drive me insane at times, but it's oh so worth it when you come home and they're ALWAYS pleased to see you, you can cuddle them when you feel down, and they do give you a reason to get out n about. Chin up chick :) xx

Yes I feel just the same, mine can be a proper pain in the ass but I love em to bits, they make me laugh, they really are good company and interact loads more than other animals, they have real personality (oh boy they really do :hihi: ) and I love the way they cuddle up beside me...I couldn't be without my dogs :)

I'm afriad that in most cases of depression, the same still applies. People who are too depressed to motivate themselves for their own sake most often end up not walking their newly-acquired dog, precisely because they are too depressed.

Of course this is a minor point if you're fostering, because whether it does you any good or not, at least you're doing something that is good for the dog. For that you should be praised.

I look at it this way.
Yes im down and depessed. But that doesnt mean I dont feed my son. I do get up and feed him but then stay laying around all day, doing nothing, letting him run about playing etc. Just because im depressed, it doesnt mean I will neglect anyone or animal. So, when my son comes and gets me out of bed in the morning and I take him down for his breakfast, and theres a dog crossing its legs cause it needs to pee, im not going to just say 'pee on the floor' and get on the sofa am I? Just like I dont say to my son, get some crisps, or get a biscuit. So I will go and throw some clothes on, and my son, and go out with the dog. Which then, ive woken myself up, got some fresh air, aswell as my son has too, so im more motivated to do stuff.

I totally understand where youre coming from, but look at it ^ that way. And as Dozy has said too.

Thanks for the other replies too :) I know it'll do me good, regardless of if people think it wont. Only I can prove people wrong.

Gina your completely right in the proving people wrong, its what i've had to do with Roxys Little wonders since i started it.

I think fostering is the best thing to do cause your helping yourself and the dog...and its not permanent :) you just gotta make up your mind which one you want to foster now :P

Gina I can honestly say that a dog will definitely motivate you. This morning I was up at 6.30 and had a great walk before going back home, quick shower and off to work.

It made me feel great and I don't suffer from depression. I'd say go for it and try your hardest to motivate yourself. You will enjoy it.

And apart from that, I only have to cry at a film and my dog snogs my face off because she's worried about me. Straight away I smile :)

There's nothing finer that having that loving little creature to come home to at the end of the day - I know when I get home she'll jump all over me, grab at my ankles because she knows its walky time. There's no feeling like it.

As for the family member - sod em! :hihi:

I'm afriad that in most cases of depression, the same still applies. People who are too depressed to motivate themselves for their own sake most often end up not walking their newly-acquired dog, precisely because they are too depressed.

Of course this is a minor point if you're fostering, because whether it does you any good or not, at least you're doing something that is good for the dog. For that you should be praised. My bold

Don't want to sound stroppy, but do you have any evidence, eg: survey results, to back up that assertion?

My partner suffered from depression, anxiety attacks and agoraphobia, and the dog we got when she took early retirement was excellent therapy for her, got her out of the house and lifted her mood no end. But we'd been dog owners before and only put off getting another one because we were both working full-time.

I would imagine that whether a dog can motivate you or not must depend partly on your level of commitment to your pets. If you're of the "well, they're just animals" contingent, then I can see how you may not be motivated enough to take them out. But, judging from her posts, I doubt very much if the OP comes into that category.


Edit: in the last paragraph, I mean "you" as in people in general, not "you" personally! If only using "one" didn't make one appear a bit of pillocky pedant!

Yes I feel just the same, mine can be a proper pain in the ass but I love em to bits, they make me laugh, they really are good company and interact loads more than other animals, they have real personality (oh boy they really do :hihi: ) and I love the way they cuddle up beside me...I couldn't be without my dogs :) My bold

Well, I couldn't possibly love Zeb if he wasn't absolutely perfect, in every way!! :hihi:

Now, you'll have to excuse me while I go and mop up another "anxiety" pee from the kitchen floor, because I "abandoned" him to pop out for all of 15 minutes.

I agree with In Uppers I was up at 6:30 this morning running round the park with my dog enjoying the first really spring like morning and it felt great. Plus you will get to meet loads of other mad dog walkers and making friends is always good.

I even enjoy walking my dog in unpleasent weather as then only other dog owners are about and that amuses me (I know small things and small minds!).

You won't know till you try and as you are fostering you don't have to make a long term commitment straight away. If more people took this sensible approach maybe there would be less abandoned dogs. I dog sat for family and friends before deciding that a dog could fit into my life, I needed to be sure I could get up at 6:30 every morning no matter what the weather.

When I lost my dad when I was 21 it was my dogs that got me through it, Knowing I had to get up and take them out kept me going. Also being out in the fresh air and you get talking to people and looking back they were my saviours bless em! xx

My dogs drive me insane at times, but it's oh so worth it when you come home and they're ALWAYS pleased to see you, you can cuddle them when you feel down, and they do give you a reason to get out n about. Chin up chick :) xx

i feel the same way myself...i truly adore my dogs..:)

Why not ask hanna45321 if you could help her out with her dog's?

its the same with all dogs isnt it teenyweeny, they all can have the ability to be nasty horrible dogs. But with the right love, training and affection they can be excellent dogs. My cousin-in-law has staffies and they were fantastic with her children, her kids are now older think ones 16 others 18 but might have got that wrong, and they've never bit her kids.
i personallly wouldnt have a staffy but its cause i wouldnt know hot to handle the breed.

If you want a dog whatever breed it may be, do it, dont listen to what your family said,.

i agree staffy dogs are excellent with kids..beautiful temperament a bit stubborn and bull headed and can be very reserved in manner,but very loving and loyal i love the staffy dog.it is the owners who do not treat this breed right who are to blame for their bad reputation.you give any dog lots of loving attention they will pay you back ten fold.:)

so what did you decide to do ??

How horrid. If I had a sister I'd be wondering if you were her because she sounds just like my Mum!

If you are adopting for a rescue they will not give you a dog which would be dangerous or unsuitable for your family. Believe me I've been through the process and they are STRICT.

Some people will never be happy and always like to stick the boot in. I've had fertility problems and my mother's response was that it was a blessing in disguise because I would make a terrible mother and would probably have my child taken off me if I had one! If I was a drunk, a drug addict, violent or insane she might have had a point but I'm honestly not.

Gina, I have 4 kids, and lots of pets, 1 puppy, 2 cats, 3 hens, 2 tortoises, they all get along ok, all resuced, except the puppy, my oldest, 21, was out at Netherlands today walking dogs, so I dont think I`m doing too badly..... the point I`m makin here is you can have pets/kids and bring them all up ok, your house may not be perfect, but then who want a perfect lovely pristine livin room with no kids an pets in it!!!! keep strong love. x

Gina, I have 4 kids, and lots of pets, 1 puppy, 2 cats, 3 hens, 2 tortoises, they all get along ok, all resuced, except the puppy, my oldest, 21, was out at Netherlands today walking dogs, so I dont think I`m doing too badly..... the point I`m makin here is you can have pets/kids and bring them all up ok, your house may not be perfect, but then who want a perfect lovely pristine livin room with no kids an pets in it!!!! keep strong love. x

Have a look at another thread in the pet section she owns a lovely staffy called Zeus now.