I lost a very dear friend to leukaemia back in 2003 - Kim Goodridge (http://www.hartlepooltoday.co.uk/ViewArticle2.aspx?SectionID=1109&ArticleID=673769) died after a battle against leukaemia aged 37!

Because her death wasn't sudden and became expected in the closing weeks her family knew exactly what she wanted and everything was in place!

Today, a colleague of mine lost her father, tragic, but again expected even after a short illness...everything is in place regarding his wishes!!

When my grandparents started to get old and frail, they talked openly and confidently about what their wishes were 'when the day came'!!

When those days did come as upsetting as they were my parents knew what their wishes were and their funerals were organised and wills were present etc !

But in the case of sudden/unexpected death are you ready?? I most certainly am not!! :confused:

I just assume if anything happens to me my hubby will get the life insurance etc etc

I carry a donor card so he knows what my wishes are regarding body tissue but not if I want

cremating/buried
music/hymns
hearse/horse and carriage
flowers/donations
etc

I also don't have a will ?? Nor does Hubby!!

Nobody wants to think about the possiblity of an untimely death and assumes these things will be 'sorted & put in place' when you are older!

What are your thoughts/wishes on the subject??

Please also vote in the poll - I would like to see if younger people do actually think about the possibility or whether like me you have put things like this on the 'back burner' so to speak!


;) for the record I would like to be cremated and ashes scattered on Roseberry Topping, music of Dead Can Dance - Host of the Seraphim, horse and carriage, and flowers and can Kristian sing Pie Jesu (whatever)

:hihi:

My family not only knows what I want when I die, but also what I want if I become terminally ill and have no quality of life.

My family know what to do when I fall off the perch.

Just get rid as cheaply as possible without lining some greedy undertaker's pockets.

Landfill would suffice.:thumbsup:

I have everything arranged so that it all goes smoothly.

With a bit of luck I will die in my sleep like my Grandfather, and not like the passengers in his coach screaming in terror.:P

i told my parents i dont want anything religious

i want faith no mores digging a grave and suprise your dead playing. i want party sized sausage rolls and everyone to get drunk :thumbsup:

and i may even pre-plan some practical jokes ;)


i love the idea of a tape recorder in a caskit with my voice saying `ermmm you made a mistake...im still alive in here...help'


why bring people down!!!!! :) party!!!!

I've got a letter attached to my will and certainly my younger sister knows what it says, my big brother did know but as he rarely if ever listens it's probably passed in one earhole and out the other.
Basically my body and all it's bits and pieces [organs etc] are donated to the university hospitals, I assume it'll give the students something to play with.
I'd also rreally like it that if my quality of life diminishes drastically that the pro life mob have all been shot and I'm allowed to die with dignity, I haven't got much to leave so I wouldn't think the three main beneficiaries of my will are going to bump me off before my time.
I know people though that are scattered all over the country and in some cases the world and so have a list of contact names and numbers which i update periodically so my sister who would probably be in charge knows who to contact.
Oh and just in case I'm not seen for a few days and there is a nasty smell coming from my house one of the neighbours has a key, after all doors are expensive to repair or replace.

I think it can be a great comfort to bereaved families that they have got not only the funeral arrangements right but the financial arrangements too!

:)

My family know i want--

Everything in black.no flowers all money to a charity or to my child or both.if i had to have one set of flowers it has to be black.

Black coffin with gold handles-were black clothes-have a black car or bike to take my coffin-with a biker mates to be in front of it all.

music has to be something not to morbid something rock type that all can head bang too so not bored.

I dont ither want nothing religous as dont belive in it.

If want me burried then want black head stone with gold writing on it.or if im cremated then leave my kid to were she wants the ashes scatterd.

dont ask for much :rolleyes:

Similar ti spinny really, apart from the music. I want everything to be black down from the clothing all the way to the flowers if any.

I also dont want anything relegious as I am not religious. I think I would want to be buried, I dont think Id go for a cremation.

As for people knowing. none of my family know what I want if I die. Im hoping there is a good few innings left in my yet, although I have cheated death at least twice in my life now, so I guess I should start planning as I may not be so lucky next time :(

Funny, me and my daughter were talking about this the other night. Hubby refuses to discuss such things but I want to make sure everything is in place.

We both have a will, but it needs updating .... must get it sorted !

No-one in black. Bright colours, fun happy music, lots of flowers and I will pre-pay the champers so that it's flowing non-stop.

Perhaps I could pre-book a comedian too, to do the service LOL
I want it to be a good laugh, a celebration and everyone to have a damn good time :thumbsup:

Bob Hope when asked where he wanted to be buried replied "surprise me!"

:D

I was chatting to the missus about this the other night and I decided to have a cremation (I can't do with having to have my relative tend my grave etc) Ashes to be scattered over a field called Middle Warren in Bedfordshire, Always look on the bright side of life - Monty Python to be done as a reading at the beginning of the service, Disco inferno playing as they lower the cheapest coffin the undertakers have into the bit at the back. No-one dressed in black (in fact I may make Hawiian shirts mandatory) and generally a celebration of life rather than mouning my passing followed by a massive session at the nearest hostelry.

The idea of hiring 3 buxom 20ish wenches to rush out at the end weeping and wailing "Oh me, oh lord - how will we carry on with life without the mighty woodsman SV?!!?" was frowned upon! :hihi:

My family know exactly what I want, wether or not they will do what I want or will be allowed to is another matter.

I want the Looney Tunes ththththththaaaaaat's all folks, played just as the curtains close at the Crematorium, no black anywhere on show, and a game of last man standing in the pub afterwards, just to see if they can beat 05:30 :D

Originally posted by WallBuilder
.
Basically my body and all it's bits and pieces [organs etc] are donated to the university hospitals, I assume it'll give the students something to play with.


:banana: :lol: :lol:

sorry, just being rude! :blush:

I would like people to wear colours too...I don't think it is disrespectful not to wear black!!

:)

Originally posted by Shiesh


;) for the record I would like to be cremated and ashes scattered on Roseberry Topping, music of Dead Can Dance - Host of the Seraphim, horse and carriage, and flowers and can Kristian sing Pie Jesu (whatever)

:hihi:

Roseberry Topping for the last resting place of Shiesh. What a lovely place. When I lived in Norton-on-Tees, this was the view from our garden gate, and I remember it with affection (apart from the drenching thunderstorm we encountered on the top when we finally got round to catching the train to Great Ayton to climb it!).

Like you, I want my ashes scattered in a place I remember with affection. Surprisingly, this will not be in my much-loved Derbyshire countryside, despite being a Derbyshire born lad. Nor will it be on a favourite mountain peak in Snowdonia, despite my hill walking holidays there year after year. Instead, I want my ashes returning to my father's native County Durham, where they can be scattered over the grave of my grandparents. I spent so many happy school holidays with them as a kid, and they are buried together in Tow Law church cemetery in a grave that overlooks the beautiful fells above Weardale.

So thanks for the nudge Sheish; time I wrote this down for whoever gets the job. But methinks I'll skip Kristian singing Pie Jesu! I'll have some music - need to think about that a bit more seriously now, and definitely some poems - and e e cummings is a must!

Right! No time like the present......where's a pen and pad?

Sorry this is completely off topic but I can't believe it people know about Roseberry Topping., I thought it was just me!
Okay so it is a fairly big and distinctive landmark but so many people have given me puzzled looks when I've mentioned it.
I had a friend who lived on the farm just at the top of the single track road that goes two thirds of the way to the summit.
A beautiful place and very atmospheric and quite desolate when there's four feet of snow on the ground as I know from past experience.
If anyone ever gets to Great Ayton have a look for the metal over sized pillar box that is in fact an early example of a victorian outside public loo.

Oooooh the thought of being buried alive, its my biggest fear. I'm to be put in a cardboard box (I usually have a few big boxes around) and cremated, preferably someone will stab me through the heart first just as a precaution, then scattered somewhere in Scotland. They can put on any 'do' they like, it won't matter to me. Hope they just have a nice time remembering me. :)

I have never discussed my funeral with my family. Hopefully, it will not be for a very long time. When the day comes, as it certainly will, I would like them to realise how much I loved them. That is the most important thing. Then, let me return to the silence from which I came. I do not want them to try to contact me via 'psychics', self-appointed 'mediums', ouija boards, tape recorders or even white noise. Leave me in f***ing peace. I say this because one of the beggars is 'into' that kind of thing, and I envisage being disturbed on a regular basis. Are you taking note, Wendy?!

Another unexpected death amongst friends...a male aged 34!! Sudden illness and very unexpected sudden death!! Who knows what tomorrow could bring...morbid subject...but yet again..are you prepared???

:(

My family know to burn me and spread my ashes wherever they want as it really won't matter to me ( sept the River Dee..lol. ).... just sing "Jerusalem" at my funeral.... not religious but if I was it is a song I would choose.... rather them just burn and dump me.... I love my kin, left a will for all my estate to go to cats society.... :D :D :D I have!

Yep. bieng tight fisted and all, i'd rather have my family chuck me in the bin.

Saxon has the right idea :thumbsup:

I doubt I will die before any of my friends or family (the selfish sods).

If there is anyone left who knew me well enough to make the effort, I will insist that they sit through a Radiohead song before I'm put in my grave.

I doubt I will die before any of my friends or family (the selfish sods).

If there is anyone left who knew me well enough to make the effort, I will insist that they sit through a Radiohead song before I'm put in my grave.

Why would you insist on taking them with you?.... sounds pretty selfish to me. :D :D :D

As I've always been an atheist, I've told my mum that I don't want any kind of religious ceremony.

I'd prefer to be cremated as then I wouldn't be taking up space in a cemetery for those who were religious, and it'd save money on the headstone.

:)

Not really discussed options with gf or family. I have made it clear and filled the relevant forms in to indicate that I want to donate my organs and give someone a second bite of the cherry.

Erm, I think I would prefer a non religious service in a non religious building i.e. pub with lots of 'tallica playing instead of any hymns. Then I would be buried in a green burial plot. Wicker casket, a bottle of jd by my side and a tree for a headstone, preferably Oak.

Since I can no longer donate my organs (which would have been my first choice) I have instead opted to have no ceremony or gathering of any sort- and please, no eulogy- a cardboard coffin, cremation and scattering of my ashes off the top of Mam Tor, hopefully leaving no trace of my existence on the earth except a little bit of good fertiliser.

This is quite the opposite of my mother- who wants a New Orleans style jazz funeral with a full parade and band.

when I depart from this wonderful world, my kids know exactly what I want, from the coffin to the music I want played!

The cheapest coffin, lined with a purple silky fabric. I want "Karma" fragrance from "Lush" sprayed on the fabric, a bar of "Karma" soap to go with and "Smooth" by Santana played as I roll into the oven - "Man, its a hot one............"!!!!

NO BLACK to be worn - just lots of happy, vibrant colours.
NO CRYING just lots of laughter.
NO FLOWERS maybe a tree planted in my memory.

Where I'm going (hopefully!) wont be cause for sadness! :)

I'm with saxon51 and yearaknow... I'd like the Economy Package, please.

*Pine (or, even better, cardboard) box
*Cremation
*Ashes, stored in a coffee can, sprinkled on the lake from my red canoe
*Cookout at the lake cottage afterward

Too bad I won't be there. Sounds fun!:mad:

Being buried alive or cremated alive terrifies me. I think donating to the medical school might be better, but it doesnt seem terribly dignified to have a load of students mess about with you.

Like a lot of you I say you can feed my body to the sea gulls as long as it costs nowt,however the kids have the last say they didn;t listen to me alive ,I don't think they're going listen to me dead.

Radiohead song


Exit Music - For A Film ?

Pardon the pun.

Well, I'm only 17 but as I don't really know how much longer I'll last out anyway I've made it clear that if they still have my body I want to be cremated. I'm not having worms eating away at me.

Basically, I want any organs worth having (which probably doesn't leave much!) donating, and if there is some active research going for Klippel Trenaunay syndrome then donate my body to that for research but if there's not then they're not having it because it'll be a waste of time as my body doesn't work how it's supposed to anyway!

I've written numerous letters every time I change my mind as to what I want. I trust my family enough to do the best they can without having to write a will out (especially not at 17 years of age).
Most of it is pretty obvious really, I don't yet have a favourite spot where i'd like to remain for ever so if I were to drop dead tomorrow they can decide where my ashes go.

I don't want people to be miserable at my funeral, but I don't want people to be celebrating the fact I'm dead. I want them to celebrate the life I had and be a teeny bit upset...
No morbid clothes or songs because that just isn't me. I'll have 'we wanna see Jesus lifted high' sung and an old favourite of mine 'I the Lord of Sea and Sky'. As well as as much soul and jazz they can fit in to one funeral.

They know that they have to keep the dog, and the little money I have either goes towards paying off bills or into my sister's savings - whatever is most needed at the time.
No bumping me off Gothic Charm!

At least one of them knows what sort of things I will not want throwing out and the rest can be sold for charity.

Really, I'll be dead, so as long as they don't give my body to the worms, I don't care what they do - it's all very well saying 'donate my body to science' but i'd rather my family be happy knowing that they have something of me left (ie. ashes) if that's what they want.
If they want to be miserable and sing sad songs, then that's what they want, but they know it's not me.

Being buried alive or cremated alive terrifies me. I think donating to the medical school might be better, but it doesnt seem terribly dignified to have a load of students mess about with you.

That's part of the reason I won't be buried, coffins have been lifted before with scratches on the inside of the lid.

But at least cremation's a bit quicker!

Me and my partner made a will a few years ago. The woman at the solicitors asked us about being buried or cremated. I suggested that as we were madly in love we should be buried together. My other half's response was something like "OMG that means you can still nag me even when we've kippered it!" I was cut to the quick! I never nag. :D