I was watching the Football Show earlier and I had to laugh at the Tranmere fans song "Who needs Mourinho, we've got our Physio"

One of my favourites at Hillsborough has been "You can stick your ******* dragon up your ****" at Cardiff fans.

Anyone think of any that have made them smile!

Neil Warnock's illegitimate........ was my fav for a while

"If you dont bounce" is a belter

There's only one graham rix.... lol!

cant think of many from other teams but Liverpool always seem to come up with some great original ones

A bow legged chicken and a knocked kneed hen,
I aint had a .................................................. ...................................and so on.

If you don't bounce is by far the worst chant I have ever herd, and it looks absolutly humiliating, and I'm not saying that just 'cos I'm a Blade regardless of what you may think, it's awful! I've also herd your lot singing ''Hark now hear'' aswell, why fight forevermore becuase of Boxing day, if you won? Lol, there isn't anything to fight for lol.

When we played Liverpool, the Kop sung

''And you'll never get a job, you'll never get a job, sign on, sign on'' Nothing new but it always makes me chuckle.

I think it was Bradford City, I'm no 100% on this who sung

''Let's pretend we've scored a goal, let's pretend we've scored a goal'' and then went mad and celebrated as if they had.

Charlton were good last year when they missed a chance "That's why we're going down"

this one was a good un

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbegkV5GIhc

even the qpr fans were chuckling to this one!

Charlton about Nicky Hunt - striker in the late 90's;

Oh Nicky Hunt,
Oh Nicky Hunt,
Oh Nicky Hunt he plays up front,
He's got a name like a fanny,
Oh Nicky Hunt he plays up front

Cruel, but funny nonetheless, was the chant of "Two Andy Gorams, There's only two Andy Gorams" after the poor lad had been diagnosed with schizophrenia.

Cruel, but funny nonetheless, was the chant of "Two Andy Gorams, There's only two Andy Gorams" after the poor lad had been diagnosed with schitzophrenia.

That's shocking!

I always remember Celtic fans taunting Rangers with Red Stars after a Euro exit and apparently sales of red beach balls are doing well in Manchester!

Man u have a good one for Park Ji Sung

Park Park wherever you may be,
You eat Dogs in your own country,
It could be worse you could be Scouse
eating rats in your
Council House.

Man utd fans to liverpool fans.
Feed the scousers let them know its christmas time.
To that world aid song.

If you don't bounce is by far the worst chant I have ever herd, and it looks absolutly humiliating, and I'm not saying that just 'cos I'm a Blade regardless of what you may think, it's awful! I've also herd your lot singing ''Hark now hear'' aswell, why fight forevermore becuase of Boxing day, if you won? Lol, there isn't anything to fight for lol.

When we played Liverpool, the Kop sung

''And you'll never get a job, you'll never get a job, sign on, sign on'' Nothing new but it always makes me chuckle.

I think it was Bradford City, I'm no 100% on this who sung

''Let's pretend we've scored a goal, let's pretend we've scored a goal'' and then went mad and celebrated as if they had.

erm coz we got sommat to sing about - singing about gettin beat by your bitter rivals 4-0 isnt something id be singing about lol

bounce is great - am i right in thinkin it started at MK Dons when fans were told not to jump about too much as the stadium wasnt the sturdiest?! or is it one of those great footballing tales that get passed around ... like the one about tevez being solely responsible for you lot gettin relegated from the premiership

the songs sang to paddy kenny by liverpool fans were funny as.....all related to his wifes extra marital affairs with his best mate :hihi::hihi::hihi::hihi::hihi:

*soz paddy but they had me in stitches* :D:D

Sometimes it’s the spur of the moment songs that stand out like” Katie Harris is our friend”, it was short lived but quite witty at the time.

Wheres my song gone lmao???????????

Shame on Arsenal allways cheating, was started by Blades, now a few teams sing it.

All so like...

there here
there there
there evey (removed)where empty seats.

My all time favourite is...

Who's your father, who's your father
Who's your father referee?
You haven't got one, you're a (removed)
you're a (removed) referee.

Always makes me laugh.

A bow legged chicken and a knocked kneed hen,
I aint had a .................................................. ...................................and so on.

Thats the one my dad always starts singing on the coaches to away matches- anyone under 40 just looks at him like he is crazy.

please remember this is a family friendly forum guys and gals- if its rude then please don't post it

Thats the one my dad always starts singing on the coaches to away matches- anyone under 40 just looks at him like he is crazy.

Yep scott, they look at you gone out, especially when I follow it up with,

Mrs Halls toffee rolls are the best.
Mrs Halls toffee rolls ae the greatest.
Etc, etc.

It was actually this that they sang on the Shoreham back around 1970/71

With a knock kneed chicken and bow legged hen
Ain't scored a goal since I don't know when
Walk with a wiggle and I talk with a squawk
doing the Shoreham boot walk

you can change the bold for something cruder !

Oh and the song was crap :hihi: :hihi:

There was one posted on SF by a Blade not long back about Leon Clarke looking like Jordans son.. I know it ain't right but it made me laugh! :hihi::hihi:

We aint got a barrel of money.
But we,ve got Woodward and Currie.

We aint got a barrel of money.
But we,ve got Woodward and Currie.

Personally I find that tedious along with Jack Charlton is dead, they always make me cringe.

There was one posted on SF by a Blade not long back about Leon Clarke looking like Jordans son.. I know it ain't right but it made me laugh! :hihi::hihi:

He looks like Jordan's baby
He loves his chips and gravy
lleeeoonnn cclaaarrrkkkeee

Brighton fans (in response to the usual "opposition" chants enquiring about their partner's whereabouts),
"You're too ugly, you're too ugly.... , to be gay!"

Paul Alcock being serenaded at next Wednesday game he officiated with :-
"Unstable (7 letter word beginning with "b" meaning illigitimate) , You're just anstable ..... "!

Needless to say we didn't get a decent decision the next time either!

West ham fans v liverpool, Weve got Di canio youve nicked our car stereo.....

Fc United fan's again......

Where having a party when Glazier dies, where having a party when Glazier dies,
Jelly and ice cream when Glazier dies, jelly and ice cream when Glazier dies,
Pass the parcel when Glazier dies, pass the parcel when Glazier dies,
Strippers and whores when Glazier dies, strippers and whores when Glazier dies.

Yep scott, they look at you gone out, especially when I follow it up with,

Mrs Halls toffee rolls are the best.
Mrs Halls toffee rolls ae the greatest.
Etc, etc.she makes strawberry jelly from her ------.?

One of the funniest is:
When your sat in row Z and the ball hits your head thats Zamora

Sung to the tune of That's Amore, by Dean Martin. Her is the tune if you don't know it
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aS6-b7CONDI

I loved this 1 from the 70s

Berti mee said to bill shankley have you ever heard of highbury he said no i dont think so but ive heard of the SUFC.....

can remember united fans singing at anfield
Ian Rush
He's got a (removed) big nose
He's got a (removed)big nose
He's got a (removed)big nose


and also the liverpool fans singing about Phil Thompson to the tune of let it snow

Oh the shadow is very frightening
stops the sun from shining light in
you can see it every where that he goes
Thompsons nose, Thompsons nose, Thompsons nose

Littlejohn, Littlejohn running down the wing
Littlejohn, Littejohn fastest (removed) thing
he's black as coal
he'll score a goal
Littlejohn, Littlejohn

I always loved;

DEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO
DEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO
We want a goal and we want one now,
not one, not two, not three, but four,
we want a goal and we want one now.

I see that beard everywhere i go,
i see it in the street and at the picture show,
have you seen him,
Corky have you seen him.

during a non league game, cant remember the teams or any details.

but the chant went

the home fand go

'Your crap and you know you are'

and the away team fans replied...

'we're crap, and we know we are'

Bradford fans during their first season in the PL;

The Premier League is upside down,
The Premier League is upside down,
We're in Europe with the Derby,
and Man Uniteds going down.

Coventry City away in the FA Cup 1997.
Player goes down injured and the blokes run on with the stretcher in the most horrendous coloured lime green jackets.
Blades fans start singing "what the (Removed) what the *** what the (removed) hell is that"
Even the lads carrying the stretcher burst out laughing

anyone watch russell howards good news? he mentioned both the fc united of manchester 'waste of council tax' song and the andy goram 'there's only 2' song ... i think someone's been watching us!!

he's big
he's red
his feet stick out the bed
peter crouch peter crouch

when he was at anfield

another oldie
he,s fat
he,s round
he bounces on the ground
sammy lee

there was one for sun ji hai at bramll lane

" He shoots
He scores
He eats your labradores
sun ji hai
sun ji hai "

few spelling mistakes like i think but u know lol

theres also one for monty at the lane

" His name is nick
montgomery
hisname is nick montgomery
hes got a touch like a rapist
his name is nick montgomery "

and if its to quiet on the kop we shout "sing up shoreham, sing up shoreham"

i herd one form chelsea i think to west ham about
" u can stick ur ******* bubbles up ur ***
u can stick ur ******* bubbles up ur ***
u can stick ur ******* bubbles
stick ur ******* bubbes
stick ur ******* bubbles up ur *** " :rant:

Blackbun fans to their neighbours in Burnley, an old ottowan song

Hands up baby Hands up, let me see your 6 fingers.

Another 1 sang by Arsenal fans to Kanu,"he's big he's black, he's had an heart attack.


UTO

I was watching the Football Show earlier and I had to laugh at the Tranmere fans song "Who needs Mourinho, we've got our Physio"

One of my favourites at Hillsborough has been "You can stick your ******* dragon up your ****" at Cardiff fans.

Anyone think of any that have made them smile!

Agree mate. Lol!

Remember being at Newcastle a few years ago and some Wednesday fans singing to the tune of Ebaneezer Goode

He's a runt, he's a runt.
The referees a runt

Except it wasn't runt, I'm sure you can guess.

Also another one was to the tune of Einstein a-go-go

Junior Agogo

But that never caught on.

And talking of Newcastle they had a funny one a couple of years back to the tune of Happy Days

Sunday, Monday, Habib Beye
Tuesday, Wednesday, Habib Beye
Thursday, Friday Habib Beye
Saturday, Habib Beye, rocking all week with you.

Oh the shadow is very frightening
stops the sun from shining light in
you can see it every where that he goes
Thompsons nose, Thompsons nose, Thompsons nose

Now that one is a cracker!

Georgie Best, Superstar,
Carries an 'andbag and wears a bra ..........

...... then he'd pop a couple in and shut the lot of us up!!!!

We aint got a barrel of money.
But we,ve got Woodward and Currie.

Hate Hate Hate HATE HATE this one!

The idiotic people who sing it (everyone in the ground except for me) have been clever enough to change the original words to:

We aint got a barrel of money
We aint got Woodward and Currie

But then they can't think of anything to change the next line to, so sing:

But with Eddie Call (can't spell his name)
Promotion is soon...... Uuuuuuuuuuuuunited!

It's a joke!

was even more of a joke when they sang it in Premier League - where was we going to get promoted to?

Hate Hate Hate HATE HATE this one!

The idiotic people who sing it (everyone in the ground except for me) have been clever enough to change the original words to:

We aint got a barrel of money
We aint got Woodward and Currie

But then they can't think of anything to change the next line to, so sing:

But with Eddie Call (can't spell his name)
Promotion is soon...... Uuuuuuuuuuuuunited!

It's a joke!

was even more of a joke when they sang it in Premier League - where was we going to get promoted to?

:loopy::loopy::loopy::loopy::loopy::loopy:

I know it isnt a chant, but I remember a Blades vs L'pool match in the mid 90's when Grobellar was going through the bribary charges. I was only a young'un but I remember the lads on the kop giving him some grief about it all, asking how much it would cost for him to let a goal in, and all he did was take his cap off and passed it to someone in the crowd for the "whip round".It got the biggest laugh and always brings a smile to my face.

swansea fans to cardiff fans..

swim away a swim away a swim away.

if you watched the game on tv yesterday you might have seen swansea fans wearing swimming goggles and arm bands. and imitating the breast stroke.

Just after Newcastle's shirt sponsors Northern Rock nearly went bust, West Ham fans were visiting St James Park and taunted the home fans with

"Banked with the Woolwich, you should have banked with the Woolwich...."

Bit sick this one from the Barnsley fans allegedly at Mondays game!

"We're having a party when Morgan Dies"

What has he done to upset them?

Bit sick this one from the Barnsley fans allegedly at Mondays game!

"We're having a party when Morgan Dies"

What has he done to upset them?

he left them.

he left them.

Did you hear them I didn't but then there wasn't many of us but we were louder than them only heard them when they scored

The best ive heard for a long time is the one about Leon Clarke for wednesday.......
''We've got jordans baby he like's chip's and gravy na na na''..... Quality

he left them.

And, you have to admit he made a completely clean break of it!

swansea fans to cardiff fans..

swim away a swim away a swim away.

if you watched the game on tv yesterday you might have seen swansea fans wearing swimming goggles and arm bands. and imitating the breast stroke.
Busy last week weren't you, making sure another episode of "Being shafted in Watford", didn't reach peoples' screens ?

One I heard back in the 80's

"Never felt more like kicking a Scouse"
from Wadsley Bridge, back to our house".....

No I don't advocate such sentiments, but it was funny.

They Couldn't Afford The Transfer Fee, Tevez, Tevez
They Couldn't Afford The Transfer Fee, Tevez, Tevez
We're Sorry For All The Hurtful Words
We're Sure You've ******* Lots Of Birds
Carlos Tevez, Fitter Than Cheryl Cole

Heard at the FA cup final sang by Arsenal fans after el tels departure from Spurs.

"Just a spoonfull of sugar helps the Venables go down, the Venablesgo down, the venables go downnnnnn" (you get the rest)



Made me laugh:hihi:

"he'll shoot . he'll score , he'll eat you labridore , its sungi hi "

"he'll shoot . he'll score , he'll eat you labridore , its sungi hi "

Lol thats a good un that :hihi::hihi:

Council tax is a good one.

We all hate leeds scum, pretty much sang by everyone, even outside football..got a chant of that started in the leadmill bar around some Leeds met students! Only banter though, harmless.

the song about steve morrow falling of a donkey

Last night at Charlton after Deon Burton had gone flying in very late and taken out a Brighton defender, some of the visiting fans started chanting :-
"You dirty Northern B*st*rd " !!!

Last night at Charlton after Deon Burton had gone flying in very late and taken out a Brighton defender, some of the visiting fans started chanting :-
"You dirty Northern B*st*rd " !!!

They must sing that to everyone. :hihi:

Last night at Charlton after Deon Burton had gone flying in very late and taken out a Brighton defender, some of the visiting fans started chanting :-
"You dirty Northern B*st*rd " !!!

Lmao another good one :hihi::hihi::hihi:

Ipswich fans sing to Norwich fans (and, with a minor change, vice versa)...

Your sister is your mother
Your father is your brother
You're all *ahem* each other
The Norwich Family!

Ipswich fans sing to Norwich fans (and, with a minor change, vice versa)...

Your sister is your mother
Your father is your brother
You're all *ahem* each other
The Norwich Family!



Marvelleous!!!

Ipswich fans sing to Norwich fans (and, with a minor change, vice versa)...

Your sister is your mother
Your father is your brother
You're all *ahem* each other
The Norwich Family!

always thought that one ended with "the barnsley family"

This is a classic this, im going to watch Fc United a week on Saturday against Buxton, should be a right giggle....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqQkJQrx0e8

This is a classic this, im going to watch Fc United a week on Saturday against Buxton, should be a right giggle....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqQkJQrx0e8

i love this one

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aL4n5E1VEM8&feature=related

i love this one

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aL4n5E1VEM8&feature=related

Yeah that is pure class that, i think thats the video whats made go and watch em to be honest m8.

always thought that one ended with "the barnsley family"

I'd guess it does around here. I used to watch Ipswich when I were a lad.

Another good un from that time, Ipswich were bottom of the league, but beating Liverpool (IIRC) 1-0:

We're sh*t, but we're beating you
We're sh*t, but we're beating you
We're sh*t, but we're beating you

I watched a match the other day, im sure it was one of the play-off hopefulls from the Championship.
They were singing, "Premiership were avin a laugh" to themselves, can't remember who it was now though lol.

I watched a match the other day, im sure it was one of the play-off hopefulls from the Championship.
They were singing, "Premiership were avin a laugh" to themselves, can't remember who it was now though lol.

I think it was the Bristol City v west brom game, where west brom looked a mid table side at best

Hopefully Inter Milan fans will be singing "Champions league were avin a laugh" at 9.50 tonight lol.
Getting a bit excited now lol.

i love this one

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aL4n5E1VEM8&feature=related

Have you seen the one where they taunt a visiting keeper, about his resemblence to Fabian Barthez (i.e folically challenged look)?

The song that premiership teams sing to rafa benitez is good-altogether now

fat spanish waiter
your'e just a fat spanish waiter



Then there was one I heard at Bramall lane when phil thompson was assistant manager at liverpool and was stood up on the touchline. The kop sang

sit down pinochio
sit down pinochio

notts county , we had a wheelbarrow and the wheel fell off, whats the meaning of this song

I was on holiday in Torquay in August 1996 and Donny Rovers were playing at Plainmoor. I
was stood with the home fans on a side terrace when the Donny fans started singing "Sammy Chung's red and white army". I counted them and there were 34.

notts county , we had a wheelbarrow and the wheel fell off, whats the meaning of this song

Don't know, and I've wondered what the connection is too.

I like one of their others, and empathised entirely three weeks ago with it:-

To "always look on the bright side of life ...
"Always sh *t on the red side of the Trent!"

ive put this on another thread but Clarke Carlisle is on countdown now so im guessing there'll be some chants about that in the near future!!

ive put this on another thread but Clarke Carlisle is on countdown now so im guessing there'll be some chants about that in the near future!!

Question one:-
Here are Burnley's 12 games left, make the 38 points minimum for survival from these with the 23 they have at the moment!

handsworth vs pitsmoor floodlights go out hansworth boys chant .smile so we can see you

alan cork, alan cork, alan alan cork
he's got no hair but we dont care, alan alan cork

cheer up david pleat
oh, what can it mean
to a kerb crawling *******
and a **** football team

opposing fans to x forest player jason lee regarding his hair stlye
Is got a pine apple on his head is got a pine apple.......

ive put this on another thread but Clarke Carlisle is on countdown now so im guessing there'll be some chants about that in the near future!!

For such an intelligent footballer, he certainly maybe a schoolboy error in conceding the decisive penalty today... maybe he should retire from football and join Jeff Stelling on C4 :)

at the lane few seasons back aimed at away teams goalie (palace maybe??)
due to his very baggy grey jogging bottoms he had on-
"tracksuit from matalan, tracksuit from matalan"
you could see his own side havin a giggle at him as well

greatest come back had to be at anfield in second leg of cup semi-final, we sang at them "your goin to win **** all, your goin to win **** all"
which they replied "you've never won **** all, you've never won **** all"

Ipswich fans sing to Norwich fans (and, with a minor change, vice versa)...

Your sister is your mother
Your father is your brother
You're all *ahem* each other
The Norwich Family!

Both sheffield teams say the same about Barnsley

Your sister is your mother
Your father is your brother
You're all **** one another
The Dingle family

she's here she's there she's every fckin where kenny's wife, kenny's wife!!!

if you shagged kenny's mrs, shagged kenny's mrs clap your hands!!! :hihi:

Mrs Bridge is going down,
going down, going down
Mrs Bridge is going down,
on John Terry.

to london bridge is falling down

Directed at Van Persie after allegations of rape, to the tune of Craig David's 'Rewind':

Van-Per-Sie!
When a girl says, "No!" - molest her.

Wolves away in the early eighties the season we played Birghton in Semi-Finals!

Wednesdays fans were getting stick about getting wet, something like we've got a "Woof you haven't".

Reply- What the ****** hells a "Woof"

Wolves fans "That's a Woof, that's a woof"

Reply- "We'll have a Woof at Wembley"

We can see you holding hands-To Brighton fans on Saturday

the quinn song makes me laugh

We can see you holding hands-To Brighton fans on Saturday A new one, TITanic where are you when your team plays at home......

We can see you holding hands-To Brighton fans on Saturday
I think they are used to that now, and play along with such.
You may well have heard their retort of
"You're too ugly to be gay!"

Always post it (probably have earlier on this thread) but the ' There's Only Two Andy Gorams' after they diagnosed his schizophrenia.

Simple and to the point. Get's me every time. :hihi:

A chant at half time at Kenilworth Road, Luton the away stand is literally on peoples back garden,
The chant went out, Get the kettle on get the kettle on, get the kettle on get the kettle on.

If you'd been in London last night Corks, you could have serenaded Tottenham fans with
"You've only come to watch (play with) the Young Boys.

If you'd been in London last night Corks, you could have serenaded Tottenham, fans with
"You've only come to watch (play with) the Young Boys.

Lol m8 it is a strange old name for a football club.

Lol m8 it is a strange old name for a football club.
I think it could be some time off yet before they are likely to win the European Cup, and meet a Peruvian team Deportivo second name 5 letters starting with a "W", ending in "a" (but when typed in, the forum subtitutes 4 asterisks !) in the World Club championship.