My husbands ex wife has just sent him a text (believing he was on nights) saying I bet your having fun on nights with a cheeky little picture of a man sticking his tongue out.

unfortunately for her he was not on nights and I got the text. and replied "it's not so bad" to which she replied "it's better in bed"

I gave her a very sharp phone call to which she made cacky excuses for making the text.

she has been a complete cow/ psycho since I met him 7 years ago, and I've had enough now.

what should I do.

they have children together, and no i did not split them up.

anyone in a similar situation or anyone who can offer advice please help!

What should you do? You should ask him how long his ex has found it appropriate to send cheeky texts to him! :| Can you be sure this isn't a regular occurrance?

Originally posted by Kristian
What should you do? You should ask him how long his ex has found it appropriate to send cheeky texts to him! :| Can you be sure this isn't a regular occurrance?

don't worry mate, already asked all the questions but to be quite honest there isn't any chance of anything having happened before as he often leaves his phone at home, surely he would guard it with his life!!

she is mad, she sends me pizzas, taxis etc, etc

she is a freak

Originally posted by littleboo
don't worry mate, already asked all the questions but to be quite honest there isn't any chance of anything having happened before as he often leaves his phone at home, surely he would guard it with his life!!

she is mad, she sends me pizzas, taxis etc, etc

she is a freak

Well it's good to hear the news about the phone; I agree he would be more guarded if he was worried.

What have you tried so far with this woman? Have you tried reasoning with her or is it time to get the authorities involved?

On the face of it it sounds like she thinks they're still mates & she's boasting to him that whilst he has to work she's tucked up in bed. I'd not necessarily read any more into the bed reference than that. At this point anyway.

I would ask your husband about it though like Kristian says - from what you say the woman's not really 'let go'. You replying to her texts & then calling may mean an end to the texts but maybe she needs to hear it directly from your husband (ie that he asks her not to contact him unless it's about the kids & to call not text). Maybe you need to hear your husband telling her this too.

He needs to be the one setting the boundaries & making it clear to her what they are & the reason for them (his respect for you & your relationship). That way whatever her motives are she'll soon find she doesn't get anywhere if you & your husband are united in how you deal with this.

The pizzas & taxis stuff sounds like you might have cause to look into the laws about harrassment :|

Personally, If it was me, I'd ask my Husband how long he'd been sleeping with his ex-wife for :nono:

Unless of course I knew that the 'ex-wife' did this kind of thing on a regular basis, just to wind me/us up, then i'd just delete it and thank god I'm not her :)

If this is something thats not happened before, which i'd assume, as it's upset you enough to post about it, then i'd definately be asking more questions....but just call me Miss Marple :heyhey:

Originally posted by littleboo
don't worry mate, already asked all the questions but to be quite honest there isn't any chance of anything having happened before as he often leaves his phone at home, surely he would guard it with his life!!

I'd go as far as to say that if he were up to no good he'd have two phones & you'd not be seeing any texts from anyone he was doing the dirty with cos they'd only have the number of the phone he kept with him at all times :|

Originally posted by Siân
I'd go as far as to say that if he were up to no good he'd have two phones & you'd not be seeing any texts from anyone he was doing the dirty with cos they'd only have the number of the phone he kept with him at all times :|

We are a suspicious lot aren't we? I think Sian has a point though. I didn't think of that

Originally posted by Kristian
We are a suspicious lot aren't we? I think Sian has a point though. I didn't think of that

I could go a lot further than that! If your other half suddenly starts paying a lot more attention to his personal hygiene & starts buying new clothes (particularly new underwear) that's the time to start getting suspicious ;)

Your landline repeatedly ringing maybe once or twice & stopping before you can answer isn't good either. Maybe someone's trying to wind you up but alternatively one ring means "I'm free you can come over" & two rings mean "don't come over".

Now I sound suspicious :P

These are just a couple of pointers that various male members of my family have taught me over the years :|

Originally posted by Siân
I could go a lot further than that! If your other half suddenly starts paying a lot more attention to his personal hygiene & starts buying new clothes (particularly new underwear) that's the time to start getting suspicious ;)

Your landline repeatedly ringing maybe once or twice & stopping before you can answer isn't good either. Maybe someone's trying to wind you up but alternatively one ring means "I'm free you can come over" & two rings mean "don't come over".

Now I sound suspicious :P

These are just a couple of pointers that various male members of my family have taught me over the years :| been through all of this with my ex,clever bitch put his name down as trish,only suggestion i have is change his sim card or phone if she does it again she has been given the new number

Originally posted by Siân
On the face of it it sounds like she thinks they're still mates & she's boasting to him that whilst he has to work she's tucked up in bed. I'd not necessarily read any more into the bed reference than that. At this point anyway.

I would ask your husband about it though like Kristian says - from what you say the woman's not really 'let go'. You replying to her texts & then calling may mean an end to the texts but maybe she needs to hear it directly from your husband (ie that he asks her not to contact him unless it's about the kids & to call not text). Maybe you need to hear your husband telling her this too.

He needs to be the one setting the boundaries & making it clear to her what they are & the reason for them (his respect for you & your relationship). That way whatever her motives are she'll soon find she doesn't get anywhere if you & your husband are united in how you deal with this.

Hi guys and thanks for all your advice,T

he last time that this happened I had borrowed my husbands phone, mine was on the blink and I was out with a friend and to be honest I did wind her up, but I didn't suggest anything...I let her do all the talking and just answered yes or no (which was wrong but full of alcohol it seemed like a good thing to do) And it got quite explicit to the point where I phoned her and yet again she said that the texts were meant for someone else!! thats why I am reading more into the bit about the bed Siân

I don't think my husband is guilty of anything apart from trying to be friendly to the stupid cow for the sake of the kids! and her certainly doesn't get time to have an affair as he is at work or home, there are no telephone calls, new underwear or anything else to suggest an affair.

I think that she is just trying to make my life hell so that his life is hell so that we split.

Last night I sent her a text saying " to be quite honest , I think that you are full of sh*t, after all this has happened before. don't text Husband any more, perhaps if you got your own life then you wouldn't have to pretend to live mine"

and so far I have heard nothing. I have banned him from talking to her and going into the house, the kids are older now so there really is no need.

I have tried reasoning with her but everytime I think that I am getting somewhere she pulls another stunt!

But I think that at this point I will take your advice and get him to ring her (in front of me)

Perhaps he's secretly enjoying the fact that he's got 2 women in his life vying for his attentions, or perhaps it could be that he's just a laid back sort of bloke who doesn't like any "aggro".

From what you've said about his behaviour, it does sound as though his ex is just trying to wind you up, but he should have been the one who stood firm on stopping this situation without you having to tell him how to do it.

I think your husband should have sorted this out a long time ago, after all if you've already told her yourself to keep out of your lives and she's still interfering, sending texts etc; then she's obviously not taking any notice of you.

She definitely needs to hear it from him.

I think that you are right Lellybee

I'm just sick of the whole thing now, it needs sorting out once and for all.

boo, be carefull though, the way she is actin now could be one of the reasons YOUR husband split with her in the first place as well as other things.
dont let your head tick over time, as your husband may not have done anything wrong. may be he is playing this down because he feels bad that the problems your havin is down to his past. you need to stick together on this and dont let it make you two argue or she has got what she wanted.
change the mobile number and tell the kids been old enough that if they want to speak to there dad then do it on land line and for them to phone.
by the sounds of it nothing really needs to be going through her any more so cut her off.
dont rise to her because she cant have your husband anymore, you can. dont let her take up any more of your time.

Originally posted by littleboo
I think that you are right Lellybee

I'm just sick of the whole thing now, it needs sorting out once and for all.


With a bit of luck once your husband takes a firm line with his ex, it should all be sorted out for you.

Good Luck, let us know how you get on :thumbsup:

Originally posted by beautynbeast
boo, be carefull though, the way she is actin now could be one of the reasons YOUR husband split with her in the first place as well as other things.
dont let your head tick over time, as your husband may not have done anything wrong. may be he is playing this down because he feels bad that the problems your havin is down to his past. you need to stick together on this and dont let it make you two argue or she has got what she wanted.
change the mobile number and tell the kids been old enough that if they want to speak to there dad then do it on land line and for them to phone.
by the sounds of it nothing really needs to be going through her any more so cut her off.
dont rise to her because she cant have your husband anymore, you can. dont let her take up any more of your time.

Great advice thanks, she has taken up way too much of my time already.

Husband called her earlier and told her not to text him anymore, or contact him unless it's to do with the kids.

The thing is she has never text me back or anything, which to be honest if she was doing nothing wrong I would have thought that she would have been on the phone to correct me, especially when I accused her of Pretending to live my life!!


I will keep you posted all is quiet at the moment, but you can never tell with her!!

There's the door, it's probably a few dozen pizza's !!! lol

il go round if you for you and kneecapped her for you she sounds a rite jealous bitch tell her to wake up and spell the coffee as your husband will never be going back to her as you can do it all better and maybe she will back off good luck. let me know on the offer!!!!

Hey louise I might take you up on that,lol ( even thought I think you mean smell the coffee) lol

that was what i meant littleboo just got a bit wound up 4 u as ive been in a similar situation

I knew what you meant...... you cheered me up and made me chuckle.

im glad i cheer u up liitleboo and made you chuckle a problem shared is a problem halved hope everything works out for you and your husband good luck louise