I saw this really nice girl working in a shop in town and was going to ask her out but I didn't know if you could do that sorta thing sucessfully, unless your really hot looking. Plus, i didnt want to embarass her infront of her work mates, and there was the fear of rejection. So it all became a issue so I left regrettfully.

Has anyone asked someone out in a department store, and what respose did you get?

I think it would stand you in good stead. At the very least she'd be flattered and look good in front of her collegues.

its probably nicer than being chatted up by some drunk sweaty man on a night out :)

Predicatable but when I worked behind a bar I would get asked out and was flattered x

Oooohhhh Ask her !

You'll make her day even if she's not slightly attracted to you or is attached. And her colleagues will drop dead with envy...

OK it's embarrassing but act like you are confident and happy. Most of us girlies love that and you won't come across as desparate but like you know what you like and will go and get it...

And you never know...... Even if she says no she'll wonder for ages if she should have said yes...

Personally I'd be mortified if I got asked out in front of my colleges while I was trying to do my job.

How about a bit of good old-fashioned note writing...

Next time you go in, buy something, and as you pay her hand her a humourous little note and give her a cheeky smile.

I suggest something like...

"Didn't want to embarrass you by asking you out in front of you're workmates, but I think you seem lovely. Perhaps we could meet for a drink - then I can prove to you that I'm not a shop assistant-stalking wierdo.
Here's my number...

(obviously don't forget to include your number!!!)

Good luck x

Originally posted by thestruggle
I saw this really nice girl working in a shop in town and was going to ask her out but I didn't know if you could do that sorta thing sucessfully, unless your really hot looking. Plus, i didnt want to embarass her infront of her work mates, and there was the fear of rejection. So it all became a issue so I left regrettfully.

Has anyone asked someone out in a department store, and what respose did you get?

Yes, the first girl I asked out worked in a shop. I was very nervous and no doubt made a botch of it.
She said she already had a boyfriend. I supose I should have asked her that first before asking her out.:(

I really like JBee's suggestion!

It has an air of mystery and also doens't put the lady 'on the spot' demanding her to say yes or no, there and then. She can have time to think and dwell ...

Originally posted by slimsid2000
Yes, the first girl I asked out worked in a shop. I was very nervous and no doubt made a botch of it.
She said she already had a boyfriend. I supose I should have asked her that first before asking her out.:(

N0 - I think you did the right thing Slimsid. If you'd have asked if she a boyfriend, she'd have known the follow up question if she'd have said no she hasn't...

So you did it with confidence and hope. I think alot of us girlies like a guy who has confidence ( not to be mistaken for a cocky twerp). You never know - next time.... it might be a thumbs up. And good on you for having the courage to do it. Braver than me I would not have had the guts to ask someone out like that.

Originally posted by JBee
Personally I'd be mortified if I got asked out in front of my colleges while I was trying to do my job.

How about a bit of good old-fashioned note writing...

Next time you go in, buy something, and as you pay her hand her a humourous little note and give her a cheeky smile.

I suggest something like...

"Didn't want to embarrass you by asking you out in front of you're workmates, but I think you seem lovely. Perhaps we could meet for a drink - then I can prove to you that I'm not a shop assistant-stalking wierdo.
Here's my number...

(obviously don't forget to include your number!!!)

Good luck x

Bloody good advice JBee, I may have to take note of that one! Or maybe carry a spare filled in napkin on my pocket ready. Better not forget and blow my nose on it first though!

Ahhh... All those years of watching blind date have finally payed off. I am the queen of dating advice.A dating guru, if you will!

Just don't ask me when was the last time I had a boyfriend...

Originally posted by slimsid2000
Yes, the first girl I asked out worked in a shop. I was very nervous and no doubt made a botch of it.
She said she already had a boyfriend. I supose I should have asked her that first before asking her out.:(

no, never ask them if they have a boyfriend first. Reason why being that saying they have a boyfriend can be a mutually satisfying way of turning down a proposal. It doesn't put her under pressure and doesn't make you look pushy.

I was going to go up to her and say: "Oh my god, you're gorgeous!", rather boldly then take it from there. But I think that would be rather extreme and scare her.

I like the note idea

You could just ask her which are her favourite haunts on a Saturday night. If she tells you then she's interested in you knowing. Then you can ask her if she'll be there this Saturday.

Tell her you might see her there. Look to see if she smiles in response. You have to read this right, coz she may be sending you elsewhere ;)

Assuming you got the above right, if you don't see her there, go back to the shop and ask her if you can take her out.

I still like the note idea. Maybe it would be a good idea to follow the note up with flowers. Arrange to have some delivered to her later the same day.

What do you think? Would that be going too far?

If I was the girl in question I would be smiling for days! :)

Originally posted by samc
N0 - I think you did the right thing Slimsid. If you'd have asked if she a boyfriend, she'd have known the follow up question if she'd have said no she hasn't...

So you did it with confidence and hope. I think alot of us girlies like a guy who has confidence ( not to be mistaken for a cocky twerp). You never know - next time.... it might be a thumbs up. And good on you for having the courage to do it. Braver than me I would not have had the guts to ask someone out like that.

Thanks Sam.

Have you ever asked anyone out or do you prefer to leave it to the men to ask you?

Originally posted by sugarnspice
If I was the girl in question I would be smiling for days! :)

Would that be from the note, or the flowers too? (and will someone just tell me if the flowers are a daft idea, and I'll shut up about them already, personally I think they'd be fine though).

I reackon flowers is a bit much Jamie. It'll make you think you're desperate or have made a huge effort, when really you want to be seen as a 'cool guy' who has spotted her a few times and liked the look of her.

She won't be interested if she knows your a sure thing. And flowers definitely give the game away!

Originally posted by Jamie
I still like the note idea. Maybe it would be a good idea to follow the note up with flowers. Arrange to have some delivered to her later the same day.

What do you think? Would that be going too far?

Or.....send the flowers first, signed "From an admirer", and then drop her a note to say that you hoped she liked them, and would she like to meet for a drink sometime? If she's got a boyfriend, or doesn't fancy you, she's more likely to deliver the news in a friendly manner, and nothing is lost. I suspect her workmates will be as jealous as hell.

Originally posted by JBee
She won't be interested if she knows your a sure thing. And flowers definitely give the game away!

Yeah, that's true. Don't want to try too hard.

Send the flowers (or flower) first then!! ... as redrobbo suggests.

You could sign it 'an admirer' and then turn up later with the note.

It doesn't have to be a desperation thing, and it shouldn't come across as such.

I don't know, women eh! they always wanna take the fun out of romance!

Originally posted by Jamie
Would that be from the note, or the flowers too? (and will someone just tell me if the flowers are a daft idea, and I'll shut up about them already, personally I think they'd be fine though).
Several people at John Lewis were sent flowers at work. They were usually really embarrased. They're a pig to get on the bus home too ;)
A small bunch would be nice though. A huge bouquet smacks of control freak - like she's supposed to be grateful. It can be scary getting flowers from strangers

You could try something more modern than flowers.

The card shops are full of teddies with messages and those tiny cakes. Bang on the door stuff can usually lighten the message well :thumbsup:

And don't do roses. They're a statement of obsession ;)

Originally posted by Strix
Several people at John Lewis were sent flowers at work. They were usually really embarrased. They're a pig to get on the bus home too ;)
A small bunch would be nice though. A huge bouquet smacks of control freak - like she's supposed to be grateful. It can be scary getting flowers from strangers

Worse still, what happens if the florist deliver the flowers to the wrong girl!?, you could end up looking like a right nicompoop!!

Some seriously gorgeous ladies in John Lewis though, do you work there Strix?

Or you could just ask out right for her digits :blush: :blush:

Im never gonna live that one down and Im never drinking Grolsch again, it does funny things to me!

Originally posted by slimsid2000
Thanks Sam.

Have you ever asked anyone out or do you prefer to leave it to the men to ask you?

I can't recall asking anyone out ( I know !!! I give you well meaning advice and I've never dared to ask anyone out, what a hypocrite).

But in my defence I have started a conversation with guys just because I have fancied them. And once more Slimsid I will tell you - it hasn't always been about their looks but the way the act, charisma, confidence, the fact they looked like they were interesting a fun. I never began a conversation with the miserable guy or the one sat leering at the girlies.. And yes it has led onto a relationship once or twice...

;)


Jamie - NO I don't think I would like the flowers until after a few dates. Then I'd think you were wonderful and not a stalker... And at this time of year sunflowers would win my heart.. Shallow but true.

Originally posted by slimsid2000
Yes, the first girl I asked out worked in a shop. I was very nervous and no doubt made a botch of it.
She said she already had a boyfriend. I supose I should have asked her that first before asking her out.:(

This can't be true Slimsid. You actually got round to asking somebody out yourself rather than asking forum members for advice on how to get a girlfriend. I am amazed.:thumbsup:

Originally posted by Jamie
Some seriously gorgeous ladies in John Lewis though, do you work there Strix?

No :D

Worked in the Peterborough branch years ago ;)

I'm not 'seriously gorgeous' either :(

Edit: Okay, maybe not 'seriously gorgeous' but I am 'seriously sexy' :hihi:
See photos in signature ;)

Next time you go in, buy something, and as you pay her hand her a humourous little note and give her a cheeky smile.

I tried this method with a girl who worked in my local supermarket.......from her reaction she was absolutely chuffed.

She didn't ring me like but then i am an ugly git!!

Amazingly enough, I was given a note by an admirer at work only last week. And get this - I am (rather obviously) a man, and she is a (terrifically gorgeous) woman! As it is almost the end of term (I am a primary school teacher), and she is a visiting therapist, she had the 'get out clause' of not seeing me for at least six (count 'em) weeks, at the end of which any potential embarrassment would have evaporated.

I asked out a woman a few months ago - she is a supply Teaching Assistant - and waited until the last day of her contract. As it turned out, she is a lesbian (I had no idea) and was therefore able to give me one of the nicest, and inarguable turning-down's imaginable. (Not that one would have argued, you understand).

Hopefully, I will not be asking anyone out for some considerable time (if at all?). But if I am, I will definately go for the 'mysterious note' technique, unless 'route one', ie a straight question, isn't the best idea.

It seems to me that the trick to male/female interaction in this way is to do a few things:

A. Avoid direct rejection
B. Increase your chance of making a good impression

A few little steps would help you meet each goal with a minimum of effort. When I was a young lad I was mortified of asking women out because I didn't want to get shot down, once I figured out a technique to spare myself direct rejection it became MUCH easier.

Never put a women on the spot. Do not ask questions like:

Will you go out with me?
Do you like me?
Want to hook up some time?

These types of questions put a person in the position of making an instant decision, a decision that probably won't go your way. Normally you'll either get a "No!" or a lie "Here take my number (fake) call me some time".

It's much better to make a statement then give them time to think about it and make a choice. Things like this:

"I think you are cool and I'd love to hang out some time, here is my number, give me a holler if you are down for something like that. If you aren't that's cool too and I hope you have a fantastic day."

Something like this doesn't force a person into an instant decision so the odds of a direct rejection are much lower. You also give the person a chance to consider it when they are home later and relaxed, not stressed and at work. This will also increase your chances of getting a hookup.

Additionally don't ask her out in front of her co-workers or ANYWHERE that might be embarrassing for her. Slip her a note with your number and say a quick phrase in a quiet voice, etc. Always be subtle and cool about it and your reaction will be much better.

Good luck mate and get a good one!

Peace,

Locker

so would i as well, go for it the struggle with the note and a smile , im telling you it would make my day