The wife suggested we go out for lunch for a change today as she only had to work this morning and I'm off all week.

Oh no I thought, a bloody restaurant. No farting between courses, no elbows on tables, no flicking peas at the geeky kid in the "I found Jesus. He was down the back of the sofa all the time" tee-shirt. Plenty of; "How is your meal sir? Would you like another coffee sir?"

"Where we going then?" I asked expecting "The Hilton", "Grosvenor House" or "That posh new McDonald's with the Michelin 5 stars award in Gutterthwaite"

Okay, so there's no such place as Gutterthwaite!

But nay. "How about Taybarn up near Tankersley? It's one of those 'All-you-can-eat' places. Costs £5.99 each and we can immitate that fat bloke in Monty Python's Meaning of Life."

With trepidation we went. Well, I had the trepidation. The wife had the purse. And two of my sons tagged along because it was free for them and there was food involved. I pictured a barn filled with screaming truants, leaking pensioners, illegals trying to sell Gucci jackets for exactly £5.99 and staff trained in the use of stoking shovels by British Rail at their catering school.

But no. It was clean, spacious, cheerful and the food - all 13 kilo of it that I had - was absolutely gorgeous. The choice was endless. The plates and cutlery were spotless - unlike the family a few tables away who were from Barnsley and whose kid had Norfolk's, and most of Berkshire's, share of acne. Even the staff appeared happy to be there.

I ate and ate and ate and sneaked a little fart in here and there and even made a point of putting all of my elbows on the table - many times - because I could. And you know what? Unlike McDonalds they didn't get second hand ketchup or 'French Fries' stuck to them. a) Because the table was clean before we started, and b) Because there wasn't a 'French Fry' in sight. Tons of chips and the sort of potato wedges that are placed under wheels to stop F16s from rolling off flight decks in mid Atlantic storms, but not a 'French Fry' to spoil the view.

I now know what 8 months of pregnancy feels like. I even sneaked in a crafty fart as we left. No one minded. No one heard it. Everyone had their head buried deep in a mountain of food fit for a king, or an acne strewn Barnsley teenager.

Me, the wife and two starving teenaged sons. Full to the brim and promising to return for a repeat performance very soon and all for £23.96 in total

My youngest son was so impressed he's planning his next romantic date for there. Apparently he's looking to pick up a fat lass so that he gets even more for his money next time.

Highly recommended folks.

Taybarn, Tankersley. Value and excellent grub.

Or you could just go to a posh restaurant and end up with half a plate of 'ready meal' and have an audience of waiters hovering around .... well .... waiting apparently. And after paying eighteen thousand quid for the privelege, don't blame me if you feel the need to call in at the chippy on the way home to top up. Oh, and they'll give you funny looks if you are caught with your elbows on the table whilst farting.

ooo might have to pop that way one day, sounds pretty decent

Goodness thanks for that Saxon you made me larrfffff , now I know where to take all my gang, including grandkids.

Glad you enjoyed it. lol

glad you enjoyed it but be warned! its not like that when all the kids arnt at skool believe me it can get very noisy, standards sometimes slip, its not always £5.99 each & the food sometimes gets stodgy & standards slip yet again at busy periods, its worth a visit now & again

Do you work there or sumat? My experience (http://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/showpost.php?p=4732467&postcount=63)was the exact opposite! :rolleyes:

I'm a hard bugger to please. I don't go in for 'eating out' or socialising, but believe me, it must have been good for me to even consider praising the place on here.

It's opposite the McDonalds/Shell garage just off the first roundabout - the one that takes you to junction 35a (M1) or Stocksbridge by-pass.

Can't miss it. You can hear the happy flatulance a mile off.:)

glad you enjoyed it but be warned! its not like that when all the kids arnt at skool believe me it can get very noisy, standards sometimes slip, its not always £5.99 each & the food sometimes gets stodgy & standards slip yet again at busy periods, its worth a visit now & again£7.99 after 5pm. Don't know about other occasions, but it was brilliant on this one.:)

Do you work there or sumat? My experience was the exact opposite!
No, don't work there and the experience I had was opposite to yours.;) And from what I just read from the other thread, just as many people enjoyed the experience as those who didn't.

Sorry Mods, couldn't see the other thread.

Goodness thanks for that Saxon you made me larrfffff , now I know where to take all my gang, including grandkids.

Glad you enjoyed it. lol


Not another Gang ?

Taybarns is the biggest pile of do do i've ever seen in my life! The food is absolutely terrible, I definitly won't go again!

£7.99 after 5pm. Don't know about other occasions, but it was brilliant on this one.:)


No, don't work there and the experience I had was opposite to yours.;)


Didn't you have any drinks ? You tight git!

I thought taybarns was good....

plenty of choice...home made pizzas,rotisserie chicken,chinese,kebabs,fish,burgers,
salad bar,carvery,pasta

and loads of desserts and ice cream machine......

free refills on the pop too..

cant go wrong for £5.99+ the price of a coke

Didn't you have any drinks ? You tight git!

A free Pepsi. I'm saving up for a Subway 12":)

I thought taybarns was good....

plenty of choice...home made pizzas,rotisserie chicken,chinese,kebabs,fish,burgers,
salad bar,carvery,pasta

and loads of desserts and ice cream machine......

free refills on the pop too..

cant go wrong for £5.99+ the price of a coke

A damn sight better than the revolting Haut Quisine crap the posh joints are passing off as meals and charging a fortune for these days.
Forgot about the 'paying for the drink' bit. The wife handed over the cash.:blush:

Just to add: not an obvious chav or 'fat git' in sight unlike your average pub at lunchtime.

Why is it these 'all you can eat' type places are sometimes full of rediculously obese people with their heads buried in huge plates of food like pigs troughing their way through breakfast!
Looked in the window of JUMBO's the other night, rammed with fat unhealthy looking families where Dad and Mum were about 20 stone each, and the siblings were also a tad on the fat side with their faces buried in plates of food and non stop bowls of ice cream...

Not all I am sure, but I wish I had taken a snap through the window of JUMBOS the other night, whichever night it was not sure, because it was just very fat people stuffing their faces with huge forkfuls ofjunk food, several of which could not get the food in their mouths fast enough!!!!!! I could live for a year on the amount I saw one family gobbling up, it looked like they had refilled their plates at least 10 times!!

It was like a comedy sletch from Little Britain, I was just waiting for a certain character to appear.........

Why is it these 'all you can eat' type places are sometimes full of rediculously obese people with their heads buried in huge plates of food like pigs troughing their way through breakfast!
Looked in the window of JUMBO's the other night, rammed with fat unhealthy looking families where Dad and Mum were about 20 stone each, and the siblings were also a tad on the fat side with their faces buried in plates of food and non stop bowls of ice cream...

Not all I am sure, but I wish I had taken a snap through the window of JUMBOS the other night, whichever night it was not sure, because it was just very fat people stuffing their faces with huge forkfuls ofjunk food, several of which could not get the food in their mouths fast enough!!!!!! I could live for a year on the amount I saw one family gobbling up, it looked like they had refilled their plates at least 10 times!!

It was like a comedy sletch from Little Britain, I was just waiting for a certain character to appear.........


Bit like all the students at the pizza hut buffet.....
a massive pile of about 100 pizza crusts left over when they left...
i think there were only about 7 of them too

greedy wastful gits....suppose it beats working!!!!

I went to the Barnsley one last week, and have also been to the one in Coventry when I was staying at the nearby Hilton for work last year.

Noticed some cost-cutting differences between them. Don't know if this is due to location, or if they have been penny-pinching over time:

- The very large turkeys on the carvery (similar to the ones you get at a Toby Carvery) have gone and have been replaced by those turkey roll things that Kerry Katona probably buys from Iceland. Needless to say I avoided it.
- The Ice Cream Factory extras have gone: no sweets or sauce. Even the raspberry coulis sauce from the fridge had vanished.
- The beer prices, very reasonable at first, have now increased to just average. However this is to be expected given the duty increase.

However was still quite nice, and the OH enjoyed it too. For £8 on a weekday evening you cant expect silver service.

Would NEVER go at weekends though, can imagine it being like hell on Earth!

sounds great , your review has really sold me on the place,

cant wait to stuff myself with crap until I am ready to puke

sounds great , your review has really sold me on the place,

cant wait to stuff myself with crap until I am ready to puke

as if sheffield does not have enough massively fat people who eat until their stomachs drag across the floor........YUK!!!!!!!

some of us dont actually go and eat until we explode as people presume.....

I usually go for the big salad bar or the carvery....

nice food!!

as if sheffield does not have enough massively fat people who eat until their stomachs drag across the floor........YUK!!!!!!!

So what you're saying, then, is that anyone who occasionally attends a buffet where the food doesn't run out and they can eat as much as they want - even birthday parties, wakes, christenings etc are all going to end up as "...massively fat people who eat until their stomachs drag across the floor........"

Never ever seen any massive fat gits at the local pub getting stuck into a meal? or in restaurants?

Funny really as I didn't see a single 'fatty' yesterday. Perhaps they just got stuck into the oodles of food they had at home instead.

Maybe there are more people with self control than you realise, eh? Maybe they just relaxed and took an hour to eat the same amount of food as someone who went to a posh restaurant put away in half that time. And just maybe some of the folks there only ate the veggie portions or the chicken.

Thanks for the warning about my impending obesity though.

Just to add: not an obvious chav or 'fat git' in sight unlike your average pub at lunchtime.

I thought you said you rarely went out?:hihi:

I thought you said you rarely went out?:hihi:Sorry. What I meant was I rarely go home.:hihi:

Sorry. What I meant was I rarely go home.:hihi:

I obviously looked in the window of Jumbos on the wrong day, or perhaps it was a special very fat people only event?? Anyway the combined weight of all the people in there would have equalled the Titanic........

I obviously looked in the window of Jumbos on the wrong day, or perhaps it was a special very fat people only event?? Anyway the combined weight of all the people in there would have equalled the Titanic........Maybe you did.

But then this thread is about Tay Barn's, not Jumbo's and as your comment about the fat people you saw in there has nothing to do with the place I'm refering to it has no bearing on what I am putting across in this thread.

Once again, there were no fat people in Tay Barn's when I was there yesterday.

There might have been in the Hilton, Wilkinson's, Meadowhall and even the Botanical Gardens, but once again, this thread isn't about the clientele of these places is it.

A pub car park full of drunken gits in S5 doesn't mean that the pub car parks in S11 are full of them as well does it.

there are plenty of fat people in goldenfleeces pubs too.

not sure what relevance that has either.

there are plenty of fat people in goldenfleeces pubs too.

not sure what relevance that has either.

Exactly, and with that in mind and ignoring all other places and their clientele problems, Tay Barn, the food and the experience was exactly as I described it to be yesterday when I visited there.

I've been a few times, sometimes it was fantastic other times not so good, even down to really poor once when there were no clean plates or cutlery at all. Sundays are the busiest and that's when standards seem to slip, we've waited anything up to an hour for a table.

If I go out with my partner we would go to Dam House, Number 23, Canteen sort of places but if I have the kids and my parents with me and I don;t want to spend a fortune I know that everyone will find something they like to eat at Taybarns so I would go back without hesitation (except on a Sunday)

Not all I am sure, but I wish I had taken a snap through the window of JUMBOS the other night, whichever night it was not sure, because it was just very fat people stuffing their faces with huge forkfuls ofjunk food, several of which could not get the food in their mouths fast enough!!!!!! I could live for a year on the amount I saw one family gobbling up, it looked like they had refilled their plates at least 10 times!!

You must have spent an awfully long time staring through the window to observe all of this. How can it "look" like one family had refilled their plate 10 times? How can you tell?

Disappointed in you Goldenfleece, your posts are normally way above this standard.