my 8 month old daughter doesn't seem to like drinking anything other than her milk and she's really cutting back on that since we started weaning her. i'm worried as my mother thinks she may be dehydrated as "she sleeps too much". she seems to have a day or 2 where she won't nap at all then sleeps heavilly for a day or 2. she has 3 bottles a day, 210ml with breakfast (1 and a half weetabix), 60-120ml with dinner (1/2- full jar HIPP babyfood) and over 100ml at bedtime with 60+ml of juice with her tea (1/2 - full jar of HIPP and a yoghurt or biscuit). she doesn't seem dehydrated to me as she's got more dribble coming out of her than water from the millennium gardens fountains.

the reason i'm concerned is that i had my mother yelling at me and accusing me of being a bad mother because i can't persuade her to drink water or juice and telling me she'll end up in hospital on a drip or DEAD if she doesn't drink more. needless to say this has upset me a lot and i just don't know what i'm doing wrong or what i could do to get her to drink more - the old adage "you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink" springs to mind.

We've had a very similar thing with my little boy who is now 26 months. He still has 3 drinks of milk a day - morning, afternoon and before bed so perhaps has a bit more than your daughter. Up until 2 weeks ago he has been the same since about 7 months old with his drinking. He would sip the odd bit off water/juice with a meal and occasionally throughout the day he would pick up his beaker and have a sip. He never drank a drink just had a sip every now and then. In a whole day he probably had less than half a beaker full of juice or water. We tried to encourage him to drink but he just wasn't having it. We tried water and lots of different cordials. The only drink I have ever known him to sit and drink (apart from milk) is Blackcurrant Fruit Shoot.

In the last 2 weeks I don't know what has come over him! Suddenly he drinks whole beakers of juice and asks for more and he does this several times a day. He must be drinking more than 5x what he was drinking 2 weeks ago!

So I would say don't worry too much about your daughter. It sounds like she drinks similar to what my son did and we've never had any problems. Like you say you can't make her drink. Leave her beaker with juice in out for her and encourage her to have a sip every now and then.

I'm not sure about the sleeping thing. All children are really different with sleeping. I wouldn't have thought it had anything to do with the drinking. You could ask your health visitor about that if you are worried.

Good luck.

Firstly your mother needs to back off. The behaviour you described is completely unnecessary and unhelpful. Not to say a bit nasty.

Secondly, your 8 month old needs approximately a pint, that's 5-600 ml of formula/bmilk a day. I reckon my 9 month old gets less some days, more others. They're individuals, so it isn't an exact science. As for water and juice, offer with every meal and between times, try different cups, etc... But if your baby is alert and active, drools, pees, cries tears and doesn't have a sunken fontanelle, don't worry. And don't be emotionally blackmailed into fretting, either.

Thanks Cosy and Corbyn, thats been really helpful. I guess I knew deepdown that there's nothing wrong with her. I wish I didn't have to rely on my mother so much for advice about my daughter but mum's had 5 of us and Robyn's my first so I really don't know what I'm doing and what's normal for her to do and what I should be worried about.

It may help if you take the milk away from the solid feedings, e.g. Wolfcub has an 8oz bottle of formula either in the middle of the night or if he doesn't wake, then first thing in the morning. At that time he's hungry/thirsty and desperate for it so all 8oz goes.

The second bottle, 6ozs, is quite variable, sometimes I use half in his solid breakfast cereal, half at snacktime. (If he had a bottle in the middle of the night, like last night, he gets that one in the morning then none till evening.) Or the whole thing at snacktime - around 11 am, so 2 hours past breakfast and 2 hours away from lunch. Or at 3.30ish because nursery feed them 'tea' at 3.30 with their milk (which is too early, nursery!). I say the whole thing, but he rarely finishes more than 3-4oz of this one

The third bottle is the bedtime bottle, given at 7pm once he's in his pyjamas, then straight into bed. He generally takes the full 8oz then (having had his solid tea or supper 1-2 hours previously). It's partly a comfort thing, sucking a bottle to sleep, and I'm happy to go with it to get his milk down him.

The two absolute milk feeds are without food first thing in the morning and last thing at night. Both are 8oz feeds, which is vaguely 480ml, so I know those get him fairly close to the 500ml mark, which makes the middle bottle a fret-free top-up. And if it helps, he's a big, fat 9 month boy, probably a fair bit larger than your 8 month old, and is thriving on that amount...so again don't get too caught up in the numbers.
Experiment, see when your baby is most likely to drink more milk, try the morning and evening thing, and the away from solids thing. Don't worry about 8oz bottles, three 6oz might be enough, or three 7oz, or what ever suits

Taking the bottle away from his solid feeds means he gets more solids down him, too...at least one jar of 7+ savoury and half of a pudding...frequently both full jars. Or equivalent...I'm teaching him about finger foods at the moment.

Having five kids in the past doesn't make you the God of Parenting...you forget things, advice changes, etc etc.
I'm not saying ignore your mum (unless she's being insanely unreasonable) just trust your instincts a little more, and feel free to come here with questions, because there's a load of us doing the same thing/going through the same thing right alongside you :)

You can tell from the colour of the wee. If its light in colour baby is getting enough fluid. You can always add more fluid by making the food more sloppy if you are worried.

Well apart from the smell and the nappy feeling full and heavy you can't tell when she's wee'd, there's no colour to it at all. I guess that means she's not dehydrated at all. She's on the small side for her age (i'm only 5'2" myself so I'm not worried about that) so I'd guess that means its not really essential for her to have a full pint of milk / formula a day just as much as she'll drink.

Also, if you gently pinch the skin and it snaps back to normal immediately it means hydration is fine.
The napping can by cyclical, we had a phase with the twins when they reduced their naps where they would nap a lot for a day or two then not at all or just less, it was a development phase.
And furthering the 'every child is different' argument, my twins have entirely different fluid intake, one drinks gallons, the other very little but both are happy, good weights, excellent growth and development etc.
My advice, harshly, based on experience is to tell your mother to butt out!

hi Nik Nak,

I wouldn't be worried at all (unless your health visitor points it out) I am sure your little girl is just fine.

babywiggle (8 months) has 10oz am bottle, 6oz @ 11am, 6oz @ 3pm and 6oz @ 7pm (ish). He rarly drinks his juice and much prefers throwing it all over the highchair/ carpet. But I don't think it's a huge worry at this age as it's more about getting them used to a cup - he will drink a lot more if it is in his bottle.

As far as sleeping goes it's completly natural - think about yourself if you slept less then normal for 3 or 4 days you would feel more tired on the 5th day.

My friends little boy got really dehydrated a while back and was almost on a drip but this was due to a virus and he was only taking 2oz of milk maybe 4 times a day. He's now feeling much better and drinking and eating anything in sight.

Another vote for not worrying here too :)

My little boy - also 8 months! - rarely has bottles as I still breastfeed but he hardly seems to be taking anything compared to pre - weaning. It did concern me a little but then he is happy healthy and growing well. He loves his solid food and I make sure he gets good nutrition from that. Although he isnt that interested in water I persevere and offer him that at every mealtime. (He probably drinks all of a couple of ounces of that throughout the whole day) All my four have been the same when it comes to water and no amount of persuasion could get them to drink it until they were ready. Just make sure it is always on offer at mealties would be the advice I would give but thats just what worked(ish!) for us.

I have had four children and they have all been different in their fluid intake. Even though your mum has had 5 kids and will no doubt have a lot of helpful hints (although some of the statements you quote above are less than helpful) she will not know your daughter as well as you do - you will spot if she isnt thriving and it sounds to me like you're doing a great job. Keep it up and enjoy your little one as they grow up so fast.

Lewis was the same at that age and I was worried as well. As his weaning progressed he drank more and more (but water) and now at 14 months I forever topping up his beaker with water.

As long as there are no signs that she is dehydrated your baby should be fine. I am sure she will start downing drinks in no time!