Ive been to the shop this morning, for the paper, and there were two lads about 16-18 years old, hanging around across the road from the shops, one of them shouted something towards me, but i didnt hear all of what they said, and thought they were shouting at someone, behind me or further down the street, when i came out of the shop they were sat on the bench by the bus stop, one asked me for a quid for the bus fair, i asked where you going? he replyed, none of you f'in business, so i just walked away... this lad then started to name call etc: while i was walking away, but then he walked up to me and after a few more f words spat at me, what this kid was on i dont know, planet lala, i think, anyway, i replyed to him that he was a dirty((B)) and turned round to walk away, i then hear this bloke, who turned out to be this kids dad, shouting at me.. for swearing at his son..... i replyed with telling him why, what they asked/said etc but all he was hell bent on doing was having a go at me... calling me a liar.... i just said fine and walked away........ i got about 100 yards down the road, and kids dad pushed me on the back, i turned round and he asked me to say sorry to his son, i said no way, he then (i think) went to lift his arm/hand to hit me, but i smacked him b4 he could, told him to f'off and leave me alone, the pobs his sons not mine... i then walked away again and left him there.... with his fat lip. I feel like ive done nothing wrong.
But now i feel guilty for hitting him because i cant be sure he was gonna hit me in the first place. was i right to react the way i did? or should i have just walked away like i tried to in the first place?:suspect: i do feel that because im quite tall im a bit of a target sometimes........
and b4 anyone asks i havent called the police because i feel no harm was done, he was just yet another lippy kid like his lippy parent!! WAS i in the right?
:::::::SEE UP DATE::::::::::

I certainly don't think you are in the wrong but if he reports it to the police it's a certainty you will be charged. I have spoke to the police several times about this kind of issue and their attitude is don't hit back not even in defence - which is pathetic. You basically supposed to take what ever beating is doled out then - if your still alive - report it. Then probably nothing will happen because there was no witnesses!

You tried to walk away several times. You tried to explain. And you acted on instincts, which I have no doubt were correct, I think he probably would have hit you. He has seen your retreat as weakness maybe and thought he could smack you about a bit in front of his lad and his mate.

I hope nothing comes of this madowl and it just dies away. I think it showed great restraint to walk away after the lad spat at you. I maybe would stay away from those shops though in the meantime in case the father decided on some retaliatory action.

:clap: Well done mate.
Good on yer. :thumbsup: 100% in the right.
If you still have the sputum sample, it can be DNA tested (like they do with bus drivers who are assaulted by being spat at)

youd get done BUT

id do the same...........lippy abusive parent breeds lippy abusive kid.......just proves both ar the same and both need a good slapping.

if the parent CANT hear what his sons just done before flying off the handle, well.....

morally you werent in the right. but realistically this guy was asking for it - is the fact that he was 'asking for it' make it acceptable to hit him? i dunno. turn the other cheek, an eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind,etc etc would have been the 'right' thing to do but again, realistically the guy is an asshole

my mate got accosted at a bus stop by a youth with a golf club. After persuading the lad of the error of his ways his ftaher then came along and proceeded to have a go at him for attacking his innocent little son (the one wielding the golf club)

scum breeds scum.

I'd have just ignored them but if they spat on me I'd have done something to the kid. Probably a little bit of scare tactics but I'll not let someone spit on me.

You did right really and showed more restraint than most

Yes - well done!

Sometimes its the only thing these tossers understand - I wouldnt even give it a second thought, you gave him plenty of chances to back off and only smaked him when you thought he was about to do the same.

I think I'd have already smaked the son and the dad long before you! I cant stand spitting.

Spot on for me, you seemd to hold back well considering he spat on you.

Fortunately, you came out of it well although probably slightly shocked, many others though may have found themselves on the receiving end. Hopefully your actiosn will stup these two dead-beats from starting on someone else

Originally posted by cobaltblue
I certainly don't think you are in the wrong but if he reports it to the police it's a certainty you will be charged. ... if your still alive - report it. Then probably nothing will happen because there was no witnesses!

Sorry to hear about your ordeal. I'm not going to judge one way or the other the 'rightness' of this situtation. I don't know what I would have done. I hope that I could have kept my cool, but from the sounds of it the guy was, in fact, asking for it. Quite literally. You tried to drop it two or three times, and he just kept coming back.

It seems that this kind of problem is often perceived: if somebody beats you up and you report it, nothing happens, but if they _try_ to beat you up and you retaliate and hit them, you _will_ get done.

In this case, how would the guy get you done? Does he know you? If not, then he can't really just point at you and go "that's him officer". You just say "wasn't me mate" and take the same tactic as the real antogonist; if there's no evidence and no confession, they can't/won't do anything.

It's just sad that decent people are having to take on the tactics of the scum of this city just because the police force are (or are perceived to be) so ineffectual.

I hate to break up this little love in, but the question was - "was I RIGHT to hit someone".

The answer to that question, in isolation from anything else, is no.

Two wrongs don't make a right.
I know you probably think I am totally naive and ignorant, but I don't believe hitting people is "Right".

It may be understandable, I may have done the same myself, but rightness is a different, higher concept than that.

Originally posted by Yodameister
I hate to break up this little love in, but the question was - "was I RIGHT to hit someone".

The answer to that question, in isolation from anything else, is no.

Two wrongs don't make a right.
I know you probably think I am totally naive and ignorant, but I don't believe hitting people is "Right".

It may be understandable, I may have done the same myself, but rightness is a different, higher concept than that.

as has been stated above.......some people only learn through violence, sad but true, sometimes you have to weigh up the situation and would talking my way out of something be better? or give the little toerag a slap.
and maybe, just maybe if you back away from it, maybe he thinks he can get away with it even more and more and even do something worse in the future?
maybe a slap would calm the little **** down? :)

I think your reaction was perfectly understandable but could get you into trouble in more ways than one. The dad is obviously a bully and needs taking down a peg or two but he could have got some of his violent cronies to back him up. Also, this happened to a friend of mine. A group of drunken trouble causers were insulting his girlfriend, he told them to get lost but one of them took a swing at my friend. He managed to dodge the attack and punched the guy who fell on the pavement and split open his head. My friend ended up being arrested and charged withe grevious bodily harm. The case was thrown out of court because the yobs couldn't get their stories straight. My friend went through months of stress as well as worrying about the person he hit - he could have died.

You shouldn't feel guilty though. Just be careful!

if the dad was there to see you call the kid a dirty ******* surely he saw the kid spit on you? therefore shouldn't he have given his kid a good clout round the back of the head not come giving you abuse?

most likely the dad was after some dosh and got his kid to go scrounge for him and then decided to have a pelt at you when you didnt cough up for his son...

personally I would've acted the same... infact I'd have probably had a bigger go at the kid only being 20 myself...

but then again I know from past experiance that its never a good idea to do that... like when I got jumped by a bunch of 14/15 year olds when I was 17 and got told that I was lucky that I hadn't actually hurt any of them when I got mobbed or I'd be in more trouble than them... who incidently got off totally scot free even though I ended up having to pay a visit to Rotherham General for a big gash on my head and ear and possible broken ribs :?

go figure... the laws really need changing with regards to kids! if they're old enough to smash your face in they're old enough to feel the full arm of the law in my oppinion!

You deserve a bloody medal quite frankly! It's about time someone stood up to the scum that own the streets of Sheffield.

Doubtless you'd be an easy target for the police (no doubt you'd tell the truth under questionning and end up being punished for it, which is something the police can't achieve with real troublecausers - how can they hit their targets against people who exploit the law better than they can?).

Good for you! :clap:

How much more were you expected to take? You tried to keep walking away but were verbally abused, physically pushed, spat on and threatened so in my opinion you had every right to do what you did.

We've all being doing the right thing for so long that people like this carry on regardless and the problem continues getting worse.
We complain about (some of) the youth of today but with parents like this they've no bl**dy chance.

Hopefully he and his kid will think twice before behaving like this again. Unfortunately I doubt it.

Don't beat yourself up ( sorry for the pun) Madowl.

:::::::UP DATE::::::
THIS GUY I HIT IVE JUST HAD HIM FOR TEA....HONEST!!!
About 4.30 my neigbour came to my house asking me if i was ok?? it turns out that her grandson went to the shops for her this morning, Hes 15, and 2 big lads had ago at him, asking him for money etc: hed gone back to his grandmothers house where his father was, and told them the story.... his dad was very upset and saw red, jumped into the car and went looking for someone who looked like what his son had told him... he spotted them having ago at me and thought i was with them...
and because im big i was in for it... he did ask why i told him, his son asked for bus fair he thought i was takin the peeee, It was only when his son, later told him it was 2 teenage lads, that he had got it wrong having a go at me.... and telling his son/mother who had hit him, that his mother said that it sounds like ME!!!!
so ive just met this bloke and his son and had a cuppa tea with them and a good laugh.... ive promised not to hit anyone, and he promised not to jump out of cars and try to hit anyone...:hihi: i still belive i was in the right in the first place though!!!! :heyhey: talk about wrong place at the wrong time!!
but it could have been much worse !!!!!!!!!!!

i did'nt even ask him how his chin was:heyhey:

I think you were very magnanimous to give him tea and make friends with him, really. He is still in the wrong, he ought to have got his facts straight before he waded in and started having a go at you.

I wish I could support the police these days but I have to agree with the poster who said that although the police never seem able to deal with aggressors they always seem able to deal with the "innocent" parties and bring the full rigour of the law down on them. It doesn't make sense to most of us.

It's a pity that the Chief Constable isn't a member of this Forum. I would really like a senior officer to explain their thinking to us on these sorts of issues.

the problem with the police is they have to stick by the law..

unfortunatly if you got jumped by 6 guys in a dark alley there would be 1 person (you) saying they attacked you, and 6 people saying you jumped one of them...

same with when it comes to kids jumping an adult... they cant really get much of a punishment for jumping you, whereas you touch them and your in for one hell of a lashing from the law... we need changes in the laws... ASBO's arent very much good until some group of kids has already put some older teen or early 20's guy/girl in hospital!

ASBO's arent very much good until some group of kids has already put some older teen or early 20's guy/girl in hospital!

...or raped someone

Originally posted by madowl
Ive been to the shop this morning, for the paper, and there were two lads about 16-18 years old, hanging around across the road from the shops, one of them shouted something towards me, but i didnt hear all of what they said, and thought they were shouting at someone, behind me or further down the street, when i came out of the shop they were sat on the bench by the bus stop, one asked me for a quid for the bus fair, i asked where you going? he replyed, none of you f'in business, so i just walked away... this lad then started to name call etc: while i was walking away, but then he walked up to me and after a few more f words spat at me, what this kid was on i dont know, planet lala, i think, anyway, i replyed to him that he was a dirty((B)) and turned round to walk away, i then hear this bloke, who turned out to be this kids dad, shouting at me.. for swearing at his son..... i replyed with telling him why, what they asked/said etc but all he was hell bent on doing was having a go at me... calling me a liar.... i just said fine and walked away........ i got about 100 yards down the road, and kids dad pushed me on the back, i turned round and he asked me to say sorry to his son, i said no way, he then (i think) went to lift his arm/hand to hit me, but i smacked him b4 he could, told him to f'off and leave me alone, the pobs his sons not mine... i then walked away again and left him there.... with his fat lip. I feel like ive done nothing wrong.
But now i feel guilty for hitting him because i cant be sure he was gonna hit me in the first place. was i right to react the way i did? or should i have just walked away like i tried to in the first place?:suspect: i do feel that because im quite tall im a bit of a target sometimes........
and b4 anyone asks i havent called the police because i feel no harm was done, he was just yet another lippy kid like his lippy parent!! WAS i in the right?
:::::::SEE UP DATE::::::::::

Good on you mate!
The world needs more like you at the minute.

You were still justified in your actions despite the twist.
Your perception was danger to yourself. You gave ample explanation & opportunity for the potential assailant to back off; it wasn't your fault he'd misjudged the whole scenario.

Self defence - you used minimal reasonable force - you stopped a perceived assault by clouting him once - then moved away.

I bet it was a grand show for the chavs who'd originally spat at you?

You should both team up now & go looking for them :heyhey: :thumbsup: