Some of you will have seen that we recently said goodbye to our Pip the papillon, still very raw.

pip belonged to our 17 year old daughter and they have always been inseparable, she has obviously been very upset.

we have two other dogs, my Rosie lurcher, my husbands molly the collie, a cuddly torty mog who thinks the sun shines out of my youngest daughter and two snooty, elusive rescue cats who live mostly outdoors and tolerate us because we feed them. Animals do seem to often bond themselves to particular people.

I need advice as to when/whether to bring a new furry into our family, i think this may help distract my 17year old and she may make a new special bond. We couldn't manage another dog but i think a funny, kooky kitten may be a good idea.
What do other animal people think, be gentle

I would consider the fact that she is 17, will soon be either fleeing the nest for uni, college or work. A furry is a long commitment that she may not be able to take with her and you will be lumbered. Would you be happy with that?

Hi Fox, good point, we had thought about that, all the animals that we have taken on we know we have ultimate responsibility for and are happy to commit to this. I wouldn't take on an animal unless OH an I were both committed they are a big responsibility.

However as feelings are running high i'm wondering if i am just being the protective mum and trying to make things alright for my daughter, hence looking for advice

Well I have had a cat that had a run in with a car and left us, my boys are still young so had to deal with death head on. We discussed it together and decided that a replacement wasn't the answer - they were fine with that. Its two years on and due to a change in circs we have now got a rescue dog but it wasn't to fill a gap, they had to get used to not having her around.

you're probably right Fox, maybe we are moving too quick. We have room/time/money for a new cat but i know we can't fill the gap, each animal is irreplaceable.

I'd (from personal experience) give it a while and see how things roll.

I think that everyone is different and very much individual in what helps when they loose a pet, personally I wait until I don't feel quite so raw but not too long, perhaps only a couple of weeks or so, I find concentrating on helping and loving a new pet really helps.

No living thing can take the place of another living thing ever, but for me love is not exclusive and I can soon find it in me to love another creature for its own self and on its own merits.

I don't think that it is disloyal to the lost pet, to the contrary I feel that it means that you had loved the pet so much that you would like to do it all again, and if you can do that plus help a little one that needs that love then that is just perfect :)

Hi Moonbird, i think you and Fox are both right, we are all still a bit shocked etc and i don't want to be irresponsible because we are feeling so sad, hence wanted to see what others have thought/experienced.

Hi Moonbird, i think you and Fox are both right, we are all still a bit shocked etc and i don't want to be irresponsible because we are feeling so sad, hence wanted to see what others have thought/experienced.

Yes I don't believe that there is any right or wrong answer to something like this, you just have to follow your own heart...I am sure that you will do just the right thing for yourself and your family :)

Thanks for that Moonbird, so sad at the moment

i lost my cat on fri 20yr old i went and got another its up to you as you know whats right for your family i feel charlie is making that heartbreak easier and will be loved just as much , i have a daugther aged 20 and believe me she isnt going anywhere got it to easy at home haha

Thanks sheff, yeah i reckon my three girls will be with me a while yet, too comfy here, and too expensive out there, don't want them to leave any time soon.

Going to give this some more thought, might be the right thing we are all soooo glum.

Thanks for that Moonbird, so sad at the moment

Yes I know only too well how it feels, I still cry many times when I think about my little dog that went to sleep in march...and others from years back, animals give so much love, and make you laugh and happy, but oh boy is it sad when they inevitably leave us.

i payed 96 pound for my cats ashes some will say i am mad but i needed to yes maybe for my own needs but then he can always be part of us as leaving him was so hard , but there is always a little furry friend waiting to come to a loving family and thats why i had to bring charlie home he is warming up the bed as i type and after been found wandering covered in sores and fleas in the cold he loves been in bed with his new mum and will never want for anything again i have never rescued a animal before as i show and breed dogs but reading on this forum about rescues thats where i headed for the oldest scruffiest mog which otherwise probably would have been overlooked and i am so glad i did he is perfectand is easing my heartbreak while we never forget the pets we have lost , new ones bring so much joy aswell

I'm really sorry to hear about yourdog amanda:(

I think I'd echo what moonbird said-although a new animal can't take the place of the one you have lost, they will find their own niche very very quickly, and I have never regretted getting any one of my animals, not ever. It's a personal thing though to be honest. I tend to be able to love someone new straight away, but for some it's too painful a reminder. I hope you come to a decision you and your daughter are both happy with:)

Good luck!

Thanks for all your replies, middle daughter has come round a bit in the last day or so...........will wait a while i think, we already have three cats and two dogs as well as three teenagers, i like a busy house .........maybe after christmas..........