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Ouija
28-10-2008, 21:19
Loosely inspired by the A-Z of excuses, I thought this might be a good one. Funny, serious etc, all welcome!

A = Awful stink - it's you. Goodbye!

B = ?
Ouija
28-10-2008, 21:20
B = Bought a thai bride online. Can't afford both of you. Close the door on your way out!
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:28
Cut their head off!
Ouija
28-10-2008, 21:36
Cut their head off!

Drastic but effective........
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:38
Easier dumping you my dear.
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:39
Freak her out!
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:40
Get outta here.!!:rant:
Ally68
28-10-2008, 21:40
jabberwocky you saved me from a ban. :hihi:
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:41
jabberwocky you saved me from a ban. :hihi:

I had to fight to keep that one decent too :D
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:42
Have her sister!
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:42
I had to fight to keep that one decent too :D

Which one ? :huh:
Ally68
28-10-2008, 21:45
It's not you, it's me. :gag:

Pattricia. F.
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:46
Which one ? :huh:

The letter F... theres so much mischief you can do with a letter F on a forum :D
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:47
The letter F... theres so much mischief you can do with a letter F on a forum :D

Oh, I see !!! You werent tempted then ? :cool:
Ouija
28-10-2008, 21:53
I need more space...........
Ally68
28-10-2008, 21:54
Oh, I see !!! You werent tempted then ? :cool:

very........
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:54
Jump up and down on her goldfish!
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:54
Jumped on my mother in law.
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:55
Kick her in shins.
Ouija
28-10-2008, 21:55
Jumped on my mother in law.

Kinky naughtiness turns you on?
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:56
Lick her feet till she faints then RUN!
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:56
Mess his tool box up!:cool:
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:57
Nut her on the snotter!
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:57
Ogle her granny!
pattricia
28-10-2008, 21:58
Press the wrong buttons.!
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 21:59
Query her ancestory!
Ouija
28-10-2008, 22:06
Rip his "£$"£^%$ off
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 22:07
Spit on her knickers!
Ally68
28-10-2008, 22:07
SMS - Cowards way out.
Ouija
28-10-2008, 22:08
Telegram - the old fashioned coward's way out.......:?:
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 22:08
Tangle her hair up!
Ouija
28-10-2008, 22:09
Use her underwear to clean the car wheels.
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 22:11
Vex her vagi.... family forum
Ouija
28-10-2008, 22:12
Vex her vagi.... family forum

That's suitably obscure. So much so, I don't understand at all! :thumbsup:

Wait till he's gone out then change all the locks.
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 22:13
X ray her till she falls to bits!
Ouija
28-10-2008, 22:15
You, me, dumpsville, comprendez?
pattricia
28-10-2008, 22:16
Yellow belly him !!:rant:
Jabberwocky
28-10-2008, 22:16
Zap her with a ray gun that was purloined from area 51.
pattricia
28-10-2008, 22:16
Zip his zits.!!
Ouija
28-10-2008, 22:17
Ask her mum out............:gag:
Salome
29-10-2008, 05:20
Brandish a baseball bat and say "Beat it Buster!!"
Crosser
29-10-2008, 06:17
"Close the door on the way out"
Clare85
29-10-2008, 14:45
Didn't I tell you I am actually gay? It's over....!
RobsNo1Fan
29-10-2008, 14:55
Every thought about swapping partners!!
Anj1364
29-10-2008, 14:58
For some time now I've been thinking about emigrating - alone.
RobsNo1Fan
29-10-2008, 15:06
Great I've caught that disease again!!! Tee hee!!!
Ally68
29-10-2008, 15:10
Have a nice life, without me.
Anj1364
29-10-2008, 15:10
Have you been itching 'down there?'
RobsNo1Fan
29-10-2008, 15:11
I've got u some cream from the docs - think u may need it!!!
Anj1364
29-10-2008, 15:12
Just thought I'd better tell you i've been seeing someone else.
Ally68
29-10-2008, 15:13
Just when I thought it was getting better. I get a second dose!
RobsNo1Fan
29-10-2008, 15:14
Kissing someone else is fine isn't it love!!
Anj1364
29-10-2008, 15:15
Lets go back to being just mates.
RobsNo1Fan
29-10-2008, 15:17
My God is that it!!
Anj1364
29-10-2008, 15:19
Now that we are a couple, we can go shopping together, get married, have babies, spend every possible minute together and won't have to have any other friends or anything.
Ally68
29-10-2008, 15:20
My God is that it!!

:hihi:

Oh to be young, free and single. I'm going for 2 out of 3.
Anj1364
29-10-2008, 15:21
Oh by the way did I tell you when we met 6 months ago - i'm married?
Ally68
29-10-2008, 15:22
piece of pee this going behind your back lark.
RobsNo1Fan
29-10-2008, 15:24
Quick u gotta go my hubbys just got home!!
Ouija
29-10-2008, 20:10
Really have to warn you, once we're married I'll be chaining you to the kitchen sink as per my family tradition. Hope that's okay....?
Vegnagun
29-10-2008, 20:22
Sod this for a bag of cheese!
Ouija
29-10-2008, 20:25
Time to go back to the missus, see you tomorrow?
Vegnagun
29-10-2008, 20:26
Umm, we need to talk... (personal experience - every time a girlfriend's said to me "we need to talk", she's not been my girlfriend for much longer)
Jabberwocky
29-10-2008, 20:26
Underneath the aaaaaarches.....

I dumped my sweety pieeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I told her I was married!


She punched me in the eye!

I asked her to forgive meeeeeeeeeee

cos I knew about her Brosssssss

She said that when they catch meeeeeeeee


Theyll break my bleedin toesssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!
Ouija
29-10-2008, 20:29
Very important announcement: You're dumped :thumbsup:
Vegnagun
29-10-2008, 20:30
... why did I agree to this again?
Vegnagun
29-10-2008, 20:37
Xylophone to the head, followed by immediate retreat
Minesadouble
29-10-2008, 20:47
Zip him up in a body bag and kick him in the Goolies :)

Maybe .....
Vegnagun
29-10-2008, 20:48
Y was missed...

"You're just not what I'm looking for - I hope you understand..."
Minesadouble
29-10-2008, 20:53
Y was missed...

"You're just not what I'm looking for - I hope you understand..."

That'd be my fault
Sorry ....Packin bags now fanks !
Ouija
29-10-2008, 20:56
Zimmers don't do it for me, I'm trading you in for a younger model.........