Hi
I am not sure what to do about my two kittens. I got a female kitten about 6 weeks ago, she's about 4 and a half months old and a 5 month old neutered male a few weeks ago. We introduced them gradually and only for a few minutes at a time and at first they just chased a lot but neither seemed to be particularly in charge.
They are still kept apart but lately they are absolutely obsessed by getting to each other but then they just fight! It seems to be her that's making all the horrible noises and hisses. I'm just not sure what to do with them - it's really hard shutting one of them out as they both love company. We really want this to work as they are both gorgeous kittens- I know it's still early days but it's horrible seeing them both so distressed. I was wondering if anyone could advise me on what to try next?

Don't seperate them and let them sort out who's boss. While you keep them apart they will see each other as a threat. If you want them to be friends you need to let them slug it out.

After a few stand off's they'll start to figure it out. It's horrible to see two beloved pets going at it like bare knuckle fighters, but they shouldn't do each other any serious damage and the sooner they start it the sooner they'll get it over with.

Your girl is telling him she's in charge and warning him off.

Thank you for your quick reply! That makes sense! I am a bit concerned about leaving them together as after they have been fighting/chasing for a few minutes he starts panting. I took him to the vets who think he is fine but have given him some antibiotics.
I do worry about them!

When you say that she's hissing and making horrible noises, what exactly do you mean? Hissing is a perfectly natural part of cat conversation and kittens can sound like they're killing each other whilst they're playing, but the chances are that they aren't. It's quite possible that they aren't fighting at all, but you've got 2 kittens who are about the same age so it's natural that they're going to vie for social standing to a certain extent.

If they aren't drawing blood on each other and you aren't finding ears on the carpet in the morning then really you have to leave them to get on with sorting out who's the boss.

Thanks - I'll leave them to get on with it and let you know how they get on.