if your a carer and your really starting to struggle, where can you turn?

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling Preach, but you're not alone.

There are things out there to help depending on your circumstances,

I'd start with a visit to your doctor who will be able to put you in touch with social services who can tell you what help is available.

Take a look at the top sticky for the Sheffield Carers Centre on this Group's main page, Preach.

thanks, i have got an appointment with someone today to discuss options.

Good luck mate, I hope they help you x

Look for a support group as well they are invaluable but it does depend on who you are caring for and their condition. Sometimes just being able to chat to someone outside the situation is helpful .Good luck.

Look for a support group as well they are invaluable but it does depend on who you are caring for and their condition. Sometimes just being able to chat to someone outside the situation is helpful .Good luck.

Very true - and online groups can be very good, too, helpful for letting off a bit of steam and knowing that others will understand and not judge you, because they've been there, too.

if your a carer and your really starting to struggle, where can you turn?

When we were really desperate the district nurse called in social services who were surprisingly helpful and they sorted out a care package including 2 nights per week, that made it possible for us to continue.

she is under a cpn who is useless..

i didnt make the appointment today but i managed to meet up with my closest mete for a bit of a drink and steam let off.

i feel a bit rough today. didnt make the appointment because something came up in work so i rearranged it for next week.

did get some time to myself last night. went out with a good friend, had a chat about it all and got quite drunk. it was a good release and i think i should try and have one night a week for a bit of me time. only problem is i always feel guilty leaving her.

henny, do you mean the care package includes 2 days a week were they go into respite or something else?

im not going to be a carer all the time, just for the periods shes ill. its coping during these times i need to learn how to do. she suggested respite but i would miss her too much and would probably knacker my self out more by visiting after work and not getting home until late..

I am making an assumption now If your wife does not like the CPN chat to GP to arrange for someone else to visit. I also find again assuming that we are talking depression/mental illness cognitive therapy works with some and trying to identify a cause. I can trace the history of my panic attacks and can put them down to one event starting them.

I am making an assumption now If your wife does not like the CPN chat to GP to arrange for someone else to visit. I also find again assuming that we are talking depression/mental illness cognitive therapy works with some and trying to identify a cause. I can trace the history of my panic attacks and can put them down to one event starting them.

shes still just my girlfriend for the time being :D

dont take this the wrong way but i dont really want to go into detail of her problems on an open forum. she has all the care package in place its just a case of riding it out while she gets better. its been quite a while though and its wore me down as i have not had any break at all apart from last night. i feel a lot better for it even i am hungover..

Its bloody hard work, caring isnt it? I hope you find a good support group or something to help a bit, theres not much worse when you have to care for someone and you feel totally on your tod.

Its bloody hard work, caring isnt it? I hope you find a good support group or something to help a bit, theres not much worse when you have to care for someone and you feel totally on your tod.

i have good understanding mates which helps. its all new to me though and im like a toddler taking my first steps. i just need to make sure i dont make myself ill and were both on medication!

sorry if im sounding like woe is me. im only the carer, she has the real problem. i have been finding it tough lately thats all.

sorry if im sounding like woe is me. im only the carer, she has the real problem. i have been finding it tough lately thats all.

Woe is me all you want, thats what the forum is here for and its high time the carers got a little notice.

There arent many things that are tougher than caring for others, even loved ones, its hard, wearing, thankless work that seems never to end.

Woe is me all you want, thats what the forum is here for and its high time the carers got a little notice.

There arent many things that are tougher than caring for others, even loved ones, its hard, wearing, thankless work that seems never to end.

What ^^^^^ he ^^^^^ said.

Shout, scream and bawl as much as you want in here, Preach. It's what this bit's for.

i feel a bit rough today. didnt make the appointment because something came up in work so i rearranged it for next week.

did get some time to myself last night. went out with a good friend, had a chat about it all and got quite drunk. it was a good release and i think i should try and have one night a week for a bit of me time. only problem is i always feel guilty leaving her.

henny, do you mean the care package includes 2 days a week were they go into respite or something else?

im not going to be a carer all the time, just for the periods shes ill. its coping during these times i need to learn how to do. she suggested respite but i would miss her too much and would probably knacker my self out more by visiting after work and not getting home until late..

Hi Preacher

How it worked for us was they gave my mum direct payments to organise her own care, and when they counted up how many hours they would agree to pay for, they counted in two nights of overnight care, 12 hours each night, making it that they paid for 36 hours of care in total each week. With the money mum was able to pay a carer to come in and give dad a break, and also to have someone to go with her to hospital etc, so it wasn't all on my dad.

I do know other people who have care packages, and as far as I know the needs of the carer are supposed to be taken into account when organising them, if your needs are not being addressed then you should speak to your social worker.

I hope your girlfriend improves soon.

What ^^^^^ he ^^^^^ said.

Shout, scream and bawl as much as you want in here, Preach. It's what this bit's for.

I second (or is it third?) that.

When I was caring for my ma-in-law I found it really helped to have a bloody good moan with some of my friends who were (or had been) carers themselves. Because they understood how isolating it can be and realise that you're not a miserable, selfish, whingeing bitch, just because you get fed up and would occasionally like a bit of time for yourself.