View Full Version : Human Body Stuff...
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 19:28 - It takes food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.
-It takes totty several weeks to work out the simplest problem.
- The attachment of human muscles to skin is what causes dimples.
-Totty think they are equal to men, its a scientific fact that theyre
bred to be pretty flowers who follow orders to the letter and totty who do are happier than totty who dont.
- The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb.
- A Tottys's heart beats faster than a man's.
- If the average male never shaved, his beard would be 13 feet long when he died.
- Men with hairless chests are more likely to get cirrhosis of the liver than men with hair.
-Tottys jaws are perpetual motion machines, they never stop.
- There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
- Side by side, 2000 cells from the human body could cover about one square inch.
- Women blink twice as much as men.
- The average person's skin weighs twice as much as their brain.
-Women never know when to stop bloody talking.
- When you are looking at someone you love, your pupils dilate...they do the same when you are looking at someone you hate!
- Your ears secrete more earwax when you are afraid than when you aren't.
- Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
Know any more...?
How many of those did you make up Jabbers? for instance 'Women never know when to stop bloody talking :rant::D
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 19:51 How many of those did you make up Jabbers? for instance 'Women never know when to stop bloody talking :rant::D
As if Id make anything up!!!!! As if Id put in detrimental things about tott... I mean women!
Now, would I do a thing like that...?
thursday 05-07-2008, 19:59 Women tend to remember things - long after men have forgotten what they said/did, didn't say/didn't do..... :) :)
Start worrying NOW, Jabbers dear! :)
Women tend to remember things - long after men have forgotten what they said/did, didn't say/didn't do..... :) :)
Start worrying NOW, Jabbers dear! :)
Dead right thursday :thumbsup:
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:03 Women tend to remember things - long after men have forgotten what they said/did, didn't say/didn't do..... :) :)
Start worrying NOW, Jabbers dear! :)
Im still being picked on by my OH for things I did BEFORE I MET HER!
I mean,,, what???? Only totty can do that! :D
thursday 05-07-2008, 20:04 Im still being picked on by my OH for things I did BEFORE I MET HER!
I mean,,, what???? Only totty can do that! :D
"Only Totty" ever needs to! :hihi:
Im still being picked on by my OH for things I did BEFORE I MET HER!
I mean,,, what???? Only totty can do that! :D
You love it when she picks on you admit it :D
It would take less than a second to snip off three thumbs worth!
It would take less than a second to snip off three thumbs worth!
:hihi: I hear he's only got little thumbs :nod:
:hihi: I hear he's only got little thumbs :nod:
I wasn't aware he'd evolved them at all:hihi:
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:12 The statements ARE accurate though, I copied them to the forum from "The bumper book of human body facts and how daft totty can be".
Trust me, would I lie...?
I wasn't aware he'd evolved them at all:hihi:
He must have somewhat, he's got offspring:D
He must have somewhat, he's got offspring:D
So have my rats but they don't have thumbs:hihi:
The statements ARE accurate though, I copied them to the forum from "The bumper book of human body facts and how daft totty can be".
Trust me, would I lie...?
Yes!Yes! Yes!
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:17 LOOK!
You dont need thumbs to sha-- procreate!
I hired a donkey! :D
The statements ARE accurate though, I copied them to the forum from "The bumper book of human body facts and how daft totty can be".
Trust me, would I lie...?
I need verification! Provide links or it will be duelling time:D
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:19 My word is my bond! I dont need links!
Ok, just for you, heres a totty related link:
LINKY (http://www.pattycarroll.com/sausages.jpg)
I need verification! Provide links or it will be duelling time:D
You scared me then mojo, I thought you wanted proof of the donkey:hihi:
My word is my bond! I dont need links!
Ok, just for you, heres a totty related link:
LINKY (http://www.pattycarroll.com/sausages.jpg)
I bet you've got her on your bedroom wall :hihi:
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:23 I bet you've got her on your bedroom wall :hihi:
Among other places in my bedroom... what a night THAT was!
You scared me then mojo, I thought you wanted proof of the donkey:hihi:
That too:hihi:
Among other places in my bedroom... what a night THAT was!
No details please :gag: I'm about to eat :hihi:
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:25 That too:hihi:
Youve seen pics of her on my Facebook!
god if she reads this... Ill be dead before I hit the ground :D
My word is my bond! I dont need links!
Ok, just for you, heres a totty related link:
LINKY (http://www.pattycarroll.com/sausages.jpg)
More like a link related totty:hihi:
Youve seen pics of her on my Facebook!
god if she reads this... Ill be dead before I hit the ground :D
Oh Julie.........
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:37 Oh Julie.........
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
God she may be a typical dense female but if she sees what I put about her, she`ll drop the kitten she was eating, raise her mighty knuckles from scraping the floor and beat me into a cream!
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
God she may be a typical dense female but if she sees what I put about her, she`ll drop the kitten she was eating, raise her mighty knuckles from scraping the floor and beat me into a cream!
Jabbers you'd better be running :hihi:
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:41 Jabbers you'd better be running :hihi:
Shes cleaning out the bathroom, theres nothing on telly so shes doing housework.. actually its the first time the lazy harridan has cleaned out that bathroom for years, its usually my job!
she`ll come down the stairs soon, demand a cup of tea and tell me how knackered she is.
women these days, you have it too easy!
heh heh
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
God she may be a typical dense female but if she sees what I put about her, she`ll drop the kitten she was eating, raise her mighty knuckles from scraping the floor and beat me into a cream!
I'm gonna tell! Via the use of sky writing over Coalville!
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:44 I'm gonna tell! Via the use of sky writing over Coalville!
A/ Its raining.
B/ Its too dark.
C/ Shes too busy bowing her head before her master (me) to look up :D
A/ Its raining.
B/ Its too dark.
C/ Shes too busy bowing her head before her master (me) to look up :D
Tomorrow you numpty!
:rolleyes:
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:46 Tomorrow you numpty!
:rolleyes:
Its Sunday tomorrow! she`ll be busy all day on the church roof giving the other gargoyles ugly lessons!
Shes cleaning out the bathroom, theres nothing on telly so shes doing housework.. actually its the first time the lazy harridan has cleaned out that bathroom for years, its usually my job!
she`ll come down the stairs soon, demand a cup of tea and tell me how knackered she is.
women these days, you have it too easy!
heh heh
You'll not be laughing when I tell you she's cleaned it with your peach dress:thumbsup:
Its Sunday tomorrow! she`ll be busy all day on the church roof giving the other gargoyles ugly lessons!
Good she'll be higher up so I can use smaller writing:D
Jabberwocky 05-07-2008, 20:49 See? The idle trollop just asked me to make her a cup of tea. I told her to get her huge arris into the kitchen and make her own damn tea and make me a coffee too while shes at it.
shes doing it too.
Im.. going to go away for a few minutes... not because Im making the drinks but... because..
Because...
Because I need to.. to...
To.. watch her to make sure shes doing it right.
Yeah.. yeah thats right, to watch her to make sure shes doing it right.
See? The idle trollop just asked me to make her a cup of tea. I told her to get her huge arris into the kitchen and make her own damn tea and make me a coffee too while shes at it.
shes doing it too.
Im.. going to go away for a few minutes... not because Im making the drinks but... because..
Because...
Because I need to.. to...
To.. watch her to make sure shes doing it right.
Yeah.. yeah thats right, to watch her to make sure shes doing it right.
Awwwww! Jabbers is a Stepford wife:D
I like my coffee weak and one sugar while your making it jabbers :hihi:
upinwath 06-07-2008, 03:00 How many men does it take to make a cup of tea?
None - It's women's work. :D
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