Can anyone recommend a good solicitor, or ones to avoid?

My situation

I am fed up with my wife’s drinking. Because of the work I do I only drink in moderation and only let my hair down at weekends. My wife goes to pubs and bars during the day and most days, while I am out earning a living. When she arrives home she more often than not makes it to the bedroom then falls to sleep in a stupor. I pay all the bills and I mean all the bills. I’ve always more than provided for her, and she has a good life. I have told her that I want a divorce and that we would sell the house and spilt it 50-50. The money from the house alone would more than keep her in her life style. But her own words were she would take me to the cleaners.

I pay into two pensions and I regularly put further money away to provide for us both when I retire. I am also due to a modest inheritance. I am worried that she can have a share of all this. Is there a way that I could put this beyond her as I don’t feel she deserve any of it.

My wife has had drink problems for many years now and has refused help. I have been assaulted by her more times than I can remember. We have lost friends because of the way she is when in drink. Our friends have told me to get out of the relationship.

Well, this started off asking for advice but ended up me getting a lot of things of my chest.

god i really wish i could help you out as from the sounds of it she should be paying you the money back she's taken.. i wish you all the best and can only suggest that if no help comes you start a new thread titled "how to get revenge on partner with childish pranks" :(

have u tried searching around on? Jeeves (http://www.ask.co.uk/) he can some times be very useful if you spend enough time on there

Welcome to the forum crookesmoor. I hope you will get some help and advice.

Your wife has been drinking for a long time, and you have lost friends because of it, and been assaulted. She is drinking during the day and most days. These are some of the classic signs of an alcoholic. Can you persuade her to seek help from Alcoholics Anonymous (although another classic sign of an alcoholic is to deny that they have a drink problem)?

Have you thought of getting help from AA? They provide support groups for spouses/family members, as well as advice and information.

If your wife won't accept help from anyone else, her drinking will continue, and possibly worsen. You may then have a difficult choice to make, although I sense your mind may already be made up. Do you separate/divorce, and if so, who lives where and how? A divorce settlement between a married couple (you do not mention if you have children) would usually see assets split 50-50. Notwithstanding your wife's drink problems, she is still entitled to somewhere to live, and to some form of maintainence. I am assuming she does not work, due to her drink problems. Pension provisions would also probably be split. You could not hide your assets from her, as you would be obliged to make a legal declaration of these in a divorce court.

You appear to have grounds for a divorce. If that is the step you wish to follow, you should obtain legal advice. I am unable to recommend a solicitor myself. Maybe other forum members can assist.

if u have children under 16 you cannot sell the house anyway.You must keep it until they are 16 (and pay for it) however it is usually valued when u divorce & your spouse would get half of the preceding price when you eventually sell up.
be prepared for solicitors costs,& loosing half of everything usually including future pension rights(if she knows about them) but this can be negotiable.
you should try to resolve it (as i have fortunately justdone) however be prepared to bite the bullet, the hard shock when you commence proceedings may wake her up.

all the best.

I am the chairperson of an alcohol recovery project and if I can help in anyway with your wife's addiction please pm me. I suggest with the financial and matromonial problems you seek the advice of a professional. The project has come across similar situations in the past and each is taken on it's own merits, no two being alike. Visit one of the citywide free counselling/advice centres held in the evenings.

Well if you really want to bite the bullet I'm going to suggest something that you probably wouldnt have even thought of.

The Priory in Nottingham (http://www.prioryhealthcare.co.uk/Find-a-centre/Facilities/Priory-Clinic-Nottingham) will I believe cost you £12k for a months stay. They do have a tremendously good sucess rate, and it could turn out to be a bargain, both financially and emotionally.

Well if you really want to bite the bullet I'm going to suggest something that you probably wouldnt have even thought of... They do have a tremendously good sucess rate, and it could turn out to be a bargain, both financially and emotionally.

Sadly, whatever the success rate, unless crookesmoor's wife changes her mind - it won't.

My wife has had drink problems for many years now and has refused help.

Have sent you a couple of PMs Crookesmoore.

Really sorry to hear about your troubles, it can't be easy for you.
It might be worth you having a look in Yellow Pages - a lot of solicitors offer a free initial interview. At least that way you'll know exactly where you stand regarding your finances, be able to ask them questions and decide what approach you want to take.
Good luck!

Originally posted by 999tigger
Have sent you a couple of PMs Crookesmoore.

Thank you all for your replies you have all been most helpful.

I have read your pm's 999tigger Thank you for the good advice. I can't reply to the pm's as there is a rule that says I have to make 5 posts before I use that function. There must be a reason for that.

Thank you to you all. you have been most kind.