View Full Version : Zamo for PM


Zamo
26-09-2003, 10:35
Quick poll to see if I should stand for Prime Minister in the next election.

My manifesto:

- Public beatings for "little ****s and yobs"
- Longer sentences for criminals
- Resurficing of all roads (just the two foot bit from the kurb out where I ride my bike)
- Boob tubes (with no bra) and mini skirts for all fit birds to be made compulsary all year round
- Cheaper beer
- "Beer goggle minders" to be employed in all establishments selling Stella
- Longer weekends
- 12 "hangover recovery" days per annum for every working man and women
- "Old people curfew" to be imposed during core hours of public activity to stop them getting in the way
- Tracksuits only to be worn by those taking part in some form of exercise
- All fit birds must "do" whatever the PM wants

From the people, for the people - vote Zamo!

DaBouncer
26-09-2003, 10:40
You got my vote Zamo.

Can we have cheaper fuel and council tax too... just add some real elements to the manifesto?

max
26-09-2003, 11:18
It was touch and go until I read that Zamo cleans his teeth with the gritty bits left at the bottom of the bath. And we all know where that comes from.

Oh, and his speeling.

Zamo
26-09-2003, 11:24
wats wrong with me speeling?

Carlwarker
26-09-2003, 11:32
'Old people curfew' - up yours sonny!

Lickszz
26-09-2003, 11:36
Originally posted by Zamo
Quick poll to see if I should stand for Prime Minister in the next election.

My manifesto:

-- "Old people curfew" to be imposed during core hours of public From the people, for the people - vote Zamo!

Not very nice Zamo, discriminating against old people before you even get in. FWIW they are significant numbers in this country who could protest vote and damage you. Perhaps you should have more respect for your elders. :)

Zamo
26-09-2003, 11:38
Originally posted by Carlwarker
'Old people curfew' - up yours sonny!

Oh dear, I've offended and isolated the silver vote!

Quick rethink... how about if we introduce speed tests and issue exemption cards to the more nimble footed OAP's?

Funke88
26-09-2003, 11:38
Originally posted by Zamo
- "Old people curfew" to be imposed during core hours of public activity to stop them getting in the way
- [/B]

Define old!

Maybe I fit into that category. But maybe I also a fit into the "fit bird" category.
Boob tubes????? Are they even in fashion?

Zamo
26-09-2003, 11:49
Originally posted by Funke88
Define old!

Maybe I fit into that category. But maybe I also a fit into the "fit bird" category.
Boob tubes????? Are they even in fashion?

Boob tubes are always "in".

For administrative purposes we will define "old" as 65 or over. However, we have just amended our manifesto so those over 65 can undergo a speed test. If they meet the minimum requirements they will be issued with an Exemption Card (EC). The EC will permit them to venture into public areas during periods of core activity. All EC's will be reviewed annually.

Funke88, if that's you in the picture then you fit nicely into the fit bird category and will of course be expect to comply with the boob tube standing order.

From the people, for the people: Vote Zamo!

Carlwarker
26-09-2003, 11:49
Boob-tubes, how unflattering for the female form.

Give me the 'Madonna'-type bras of the fifties anytime.

Zamo
26-09-2003, 11:54
Originally posted by Carlwarker
Boob-tubes, how unflattering for the female form.

Give me the 'Madonna'-type bras of the fifties anytime.
Sorry Carlwarker, there are health & safety issues to consider... you could take someone's eye out with one of those.

From the people, for the people: Vote Zamo!

Belle
26-09-2003, 11:56
Having met Zamo in the flesh so to speak, at our last bash, I can confirm that he will win the old lady vote, speeding restrictions aside, just on looks.......

I can see it now

"I am voting for that nice young man with the lovely hair and the nice smile"

Isnt that what they used to say about TB before he aged overnight?

upholder
26-09-2003, 12:00
You will need a deputy PM, I propose Hal to avoid alienating the silver vote, and his equally tolerant policies.

Cheap beer, not radical enough. Should be free :D

Zamo
26-09-2003, 12:04
Originally posted by LouiseB
I can see it now

"I am voting for that nice young man with the lovely hair and the nice smile"

Isnt that what they used to say about TB before he aged overnight?
Thanks Louise. I'd like to thank my sponsers Anusol for helping me keep those wrinkles at bay!

Anusol says: Got a pain in the a*se... vote Zamo!

Carlwarker
26-09-2003, 12:12
Originally posted by Zamo
[B]Sorry Carlwarker, there are health & safety issues to consider... you could take someone's eye out with one of those.



That's why shades were invented!

Funke88
27-09-2003, 16:53
Originally posted by Zamo
Funke88, if that's you in the picture then you fit nicely into the fit bird category and will of course be expect to comply with the boob tube standing order.



Yeh, yeh, Zammo, you're right - that really IS me in the picture!!
I wear tight n' sexy shiny black leather suits too with thigh high boots!
:wow:

nomme
28-09-2003, 21:11
Originally posted by Funke88
Yeh, yeh, Zammo, you're right - that really IS me in the picture!!


Really!? You look just like that woman out of 'The Matrix'.

Nomme

JTH
28-09-2003, 21:41
You know Nomme, I thought that, but I didn't want to comment!

Zamo
29-09-2003, 08:59
Originally posted by Funke88
Yeh, yeh, Zammo, you're right - that really IS me in the picture!!
I wear tight n' sexy shiny black leather suits too with thigh high boots!
:wow:

I don't believe it... so do I! Perhaps we could swap photos?:blush: ;)

Funke88
03-10-2003, 01:38
Originally posted by nommedenet
Really!? You look just like that woman out of 'The Matrix'.

Nomme
Yes, correct. But don't tell Zammo, let him think that really IS me. I fancy myself as the chick off the Matrix anyway.
Carrie Ann Moss:- She kicks ass!
She'd have Zammo for breakfast!

Zamo
03-10-2003, 13:46
Originally posted by Funke88
Yes, correct. But don't tell Zammo, let him think that really IS me. I fancy myself as the chick off the Matrix anyway.
Carrie Ann Moss:- She kicks ass!
She'd have Zammo for breakfast!
Oooh missus! A splash of milk and a sprinkle of sugar and she can indeed have me for breakfast!

Classic Rock
03-10-2003, 14:57
You've got my vote, first run on the ladder would be standing as Councillor....pick a ward......perhaps Ecclesall?

Zamo
03-10-2003, 15:20
Originally posted by Classic Rock
You've got my vote, first run on the ladder would be standing as Councillor....pick a ward......perhaps Ecclesall?
Maybe. Still getting to know the areas. Now where is Ecclesall again? Oh yeah, silly me, it must be along Ecclesall Road.

Bucketta
03-10-2003, 15:39
Originally posted by Funke88
Yeh, yeh, Zammo, you're right - that really IS me in the picture!!
I wear tight n' sexy shiny black leather suits too with thigh high boots!
:wow:

Really??? Kewl!!! Can you give me a ride on the back of your bike then???:wave:

Funke88
04-10-2003, 23:16
Originally posted by Bucketta
Really??? Kewl!!! Can you give me a ride on the back of your bike then???:wave:
Right now I have a push bike? Don't think 2 will fit very well. Plus the only thing rubber that I own is a pair of old wellies.