OK - I did watch corrie tonight... between martin and whats her name.

So, what is an acceptable age gap between 2 adults who are a couple?

5 year? 10? 20?

I suppose a 10 year gap sounds worst between a 16 year old and 26 year old - but 30 and 40 doesn't sound too bad.

It depends how 'enlightened' you are. 30 years ago such an age difference, especially with one only 16, would have been shocking. But, I don't think most care anymore.

Depends on how old the younger party is.

If I'd have been Tommy, Martin would have been needing hospital treatment for his injuries. Resulting in him needing a spinal board out of the back garden.

Maybe it's hypocritical, but I would be less protective over my son.
Unless my son was gay and his partner turned out to be martins age... then the same rules would apply!

Mixed up... me?:o

.

Originally posted by John
OK - I did watch corrie tonight... between martin and whats her name.

So, what is an acceptable age gap between 2 adults who are a couple?

5 year? 10? 20?

I suppose a 10 year gap sounds worst between a 16 year old and 26 year old - but 30 and 40 doesn't sound too bad.

Why is a bloke called a perv when hes older in this case and she is known as having a toy boy which doesn't sound as bad?


Its not important any more, no one cares anyway,just do as you like,no one will judge you.

I'm curious to know how many people on here, male and around Martin's age, would do what he did - given half the chance?

I've just watched that episode of Corrie too!

It would be a bit sick to have a real life situation where there's a man Martin's age and a girl Katy's age seeing eachother. But on second thoughts, if its love, if its the real thing then there's nothing that can be done.

I can see sense in going for older men, but by "older" I mean 2 or 3 years, 4 years max (at my age anyway!) Personally (as most of you know) I have been seeing someone 3 years older than myself for almost a year and the age gap is not even an issue. We are equals, we're in love ~ my "kiddyness" doesn't bother him and his extra rights and responsibilities don't bring out the green monster in me!

It's not so much of an issue when you're 30 or 40, its just a bit fishy when the youngest partner is hovering around the age of consent.

What about Chris Evans? Nobody seems to bat an eye lid when he married a teenager.

Or Bill Wyman and Mandy Smith.

Or Peter Stringfellow.....

I think it depends on how you feel about the person.
When i was 21 i lived with a guy that was 20 years older than me, i didn't have a problem with this, he found it difficult.
My parents were the worst , never met him, but he was older than them so they were not pleased.
Now i wud do it again if it meant i was happy, wud be even happier if other way around but thats unlikely and i wud be looked on badly and i'd most prob loose my job.
No i didn't see corrie.

Perhaps it's all down to sexism and double standards. Most blokes would probably do the same as Martin, but if it was their daughter, they would act completely differently.

In my opinion, a 16 year old is still a kid. Whilst the age of consent is 16, I believe that it should be adjusted so that the older partner cannot be over 21 if the younger partner is under 18. So, for example, a 16 year old or 17 year old would not legally be able to have sex with anyone older than 21. This way, old perverts that chase 16 year old girls, or indeed older women who chase 16 year old boys, will not just be perverts but we would actually be able to do something about them through the law.

I heard Tommy make the comment to her: 'You're not old enough to buy half a lager'......thus not old enough to make this sort of decision.

Good old licensing laws.......

Martin is suffering from "Little Head Telling Big head What to Do Syndrome". Sometimes it can be mighty hard to ignore but when it's your mates daughter you shouldn't listen! Therefore, Martin deserves a slap. However, if it had been someone else’s daughter then it would be fair play.

I know... I'm full of double standards and contradictions but it is something I have learnt to live with.:)

I dont watch Coronation Street so dont know the facts....

I dont think you can generalise about age gaps really.

For some people who are very mature and grown up and even seen as boring to their peers, they might need someone older.

For some who are young and giggly and naive, younger even than their years, they perhaps need a partner of a similar or younger age too.

Some women prefer father figures, some prefer toy boys.

For some their desire changes over the years.

Speaking personally, over the years I have had boyfriends who have ranged from 2 years younger than me to 30 years older than me.

The one I cared the most for was my age, because we had a lot of shared memories in common, remembering the same pop songs and films etc.

Of course I would not encourage any relationship based on exploitation where one partner is manipulating the other. But often the younger partner can be the manipulator, it doesnt always have to be the older one in charge.

Well my hubby is 16 years older than me :D

Also, at one time in our history it was common place for young women to be married off to older men. Girls as young as 12 were becoming mothers and wives to wealthy estate owners.

Ho hum

Moon

well being i'm 16 (not for much longer!) and i had a relationship with someone who was 30 so thats 14 years older but to us the age difference didnt mean anything!

if you truely do love someone why should age come into the equation? after all age is nothing but a number

Originally posted by damo4real
well being i'm 16 (not for much longer!) and i had a relationship with someone who was 30 so thats 14 years older but to us the age difference didnt mean anything!

if you truely do love someone why should age come into the equation? after all age is nothing but a number

You say age doesn't matter as long as two people are in love. Would it matter if all they wanted was a sh*g?!? It is because the young (esp girls) can sometimes have over-romanticised views of the world that they are susceptible to older people taking advantage.

Frankly (and factually) age is not "just a number". For example the difference between being 30 and 16 is HUGE! Compare yourself with a 2 y.o. and think how much you have learnt/changed in those 14 years - well you don't stop learning/changing at 16! It is because us "oldies" (I'm 34 by the way) know how different we are now to when we were 16 that we find it hard to understand what someone older wants with a young person other than their young body (no offence!!!).

The bottom line is that as a man I would have no qualms about sh*gging a 16 y.o. but can't imagine having enough in common with one to "fall in love". That said, I would also have no qualms in telling her that I was in love if it got me the shag... herein lies the warning!!!!!

if is was martin, tommy would never see me, id be on his daughter 24/7 :P and sendin him the polaroids hahaha

Originally posted by Moon Maiden
Well my hubby is 16 years older than me :D Moon

:o he doesnt look it! (and you can tell him that if you like :lol: )

Originally posted by RPG
:o he doesnt look it! (and you can tell him that if you like :lol: )
Steady on Rob.... you'll need to clarify.

Does that mean Moon looks older or Nosferatu looks younger? :o

at the end of the day surely all thet matters is that the 2 people are equal in the relationship and that they love each other. As long as it is leagl and it does not affect anyone elses life substantially then all that matters is that the 2 people are in love.

sammie
xxx

Originally posted by DaBouncer
Steady on Rob.... you'll need to clarify.

Does that mean Moon looks older or Nosferatu looks younger? :o

i thought they both looked around 25 really, moon being on the lesser side of 25 naturally ;)

My Maternal Grandfather had his 18th birthday about 4 months or so before my Maternal Grandmother was born - She was 22 when they married, and from what I can gather no-one ever batted an eyelid

I suppose it goes with the times. These days perhaps its looked upon as being unusual for there to be an age gap in its teens.

When my mother and father married, there were 14 years between their ages, my father being the senior, ( this was back in 1968 ) but equally on the other hand my mother was happy with the marriage which she said was very stable as my dad was a family oriented man and was secure. He passed away in 1995, and as any marriage does, it has its ups and down, but at no time did he back out of his commitments (or even hint as such) to his wife and kids and I have fond memories of everything we used to do together as a family.

I sometimes think it was this age and experience that he had that kept everything together, and for me I know he was always there if I needed his help or guidance. Even now I still feel he is here to help me such was our father-son bond. It gives me alot of encouragement to know that me going through college/uni would have made him proud. :)

1Man&HisBMW

Originally posted by RPG
i thought they both looked around 25 really, moon being on the lesser side of 25 naturally ;)

Are we talking about the same fella here??? My hubby is greying tall and skinny - not the short stubby blonde one (barf).
People have said he looks younger than 42 but not THAT young!

Wow. Nicely dug out there RPG!

Moon Maiden

as long as the two people are happy then who should judge!

Originally posted by f_g
as long as the two people are happy then who should judge!

Yessir!

If I were in Tommys shoes the age thing wouldn't be the problem it would be the fact my daughter was in love with Martin Pratt, I can't stand him.

just out of curiosity , whats the highest acceptable age difference do people reckon between couples? obviously over the age of 16....

Don't think there's any hard and fast rule - people mature at different rates and the main thing is what the feel for each other, not what other people find acceptable imho.

Agreed. Once went out with an older woman (by eighteen years) who was entirely unsuitable; then went out with an eighteen year old who suited me perfectly.

I do have my suspicions where one f the parties isn't exactly into adulthood and the other is of advancing years - relationships have to be based on a level-playing field.

My Uncle was 20 years older than my Auntie...

10 years between my parents
Chloé

Nothing wrong with the actuall morality of a large age difference but most in time do not work out.
A 20 year age gap can seem good at the beggining of a relationship with a feeling of security by the younger party and an ego thing with the older one.
As soon as the relationship gets on, cracks usually appear with one (usually the older one) getting posessive and the younger one realising that an older partner can be embarrassing especially when meeting friends of there own age.
It would be interesting if anyone on here has a relationship of that stature and have made it a success.
Personally my wife is 2 years younger than me so I am not in a position to tell you how it feels but i do know someone my age who is in relations with an older gent and i get vibrations that not allis well on the western front.

Robert is 15 years younger than me and this is not an issue between us or people who know us (including our parents). Its people who don't know us that make it an issue and have this vision of a mature woman taking advantage!
Lucky Robert!:D

It should be a matter between the two persons involved - it's no one else's business.

I think as long as both parties are over 18 it doesn't really matter, though it will always raise a few brows. Despite the age of consent being 16, however, the fact is that 16 year olds are still kids and anyone older than about 21 is definitely an adult. The thought of a 16 year old going out with a 40 year old, for example, is quite disturbing.

Originally posted by t020
I...The thought of a 16 year old going out with a 40 year old, for example, is quite disturbing.

Why - it's their business - not yours or anyone elses.

Merged this new thread with an indentical old one to avoid duplication.

Search is our friend... ;)

Originally posted by Carlwarker
Why - it's their business - not yours or anyone elses.

Well, its also the 16 year olds parents business as they are still their legal guardians until 18. Also, it does seem wrong. A 16 year old can look 18 yes, but can also look 13 too. You have to question the older mans motives (used man because most paedophiles are men as far as I'm aware).

Originally posted by t020
Well, its also the 16 year olds parents business as they are still their legal guardians until 18. Also, it does seem wrong. A 16 year old can look 18 yes, but can also look 13 too. You have to question the older mans motives (used man because most paedophiles are men as far as I'm aware).

Definetly. You have to ask what the 40 year old is getting out of it (besides the obvious!)

Originally posted by t020
Well, its also the 16 year olds parents business as they are still their legal guardians until 18. Also, it does seem wrong. A 16 year old can look 18 yes, but can also look 13 too. You have to question the older mans motives (used man because most paedophiles are men as far as I'm aware).

What a sad suspicious mind you seem to have. I doubt that a man is a pervert if he is willing to MARRY a younger woman - albeit she may be sixteen. Haven't you ever heard of love? Or does it pass your understanding.

ps. in many parts of the world a sixteen year-old is not considered a child - neither is one in the UK.

Originally posted by Carlwarker
What a sad suspicious mind you seem to have. I doubt that a man is a pervert if he is willing to MARRY a younger woman - albeit she may be sixteen. Haven't you ever heard of love? Or does it pass your understanding.

ps. in many parts of the world a sixteen year-old is not considered a child - neither is one in the UK.

Yes, love could come into it. But if an older man is going out with a 16 year old girl, or boy for that matter, that looks about 12, then surely one has to be suspicious?

What dreadful cynics some of us are! I think it's impossible to generalise, and that we can only comment on individual circumstances. I know plenty of very mature 16/17 year olds, and some that are practically still children. So long as the younger one is above the age of consent and fully understands what he or she is getting him/herself into, then surely no age gap should be considered a barrier. At a time when most marriages and long term relationships fail, what would be wrong with letting two people who genuinely love each other just get on with it?

Age is not important, it is whether two people can get on together that matters. Men and Women the same age cannot agree on anything sometimes, so being the same age doesn't guarrantee harmony in a relationship.

I feel age is generally unimportant so long as both parties are comfortable with it.

Originally posted by Lickszz
I feel age is generally unimportant so long as both parties are comfortable with it.


Is an impressionable, confused 16 year old really old enough to decide whether or not they are 'comfortable' with their 40 odd year old, school lingering, compensatory father-figure of a boyfriend?

I'd class it as individual cirumstance. That would depend on the 16 year old in question.

I'd say just under one generation - a maximum of about 15 years.

BUT... 16 and 31 sounds a bit off. So I'll refine it to the older one being max. 50% older. In other words, if the younger's 16, the older can be up to 24. If the younger's 40, the older can be up to 60.


Also, I don't really see what problem people have with relationships where one of the people is under 16. As long as the relationship isn't in the bedroom, there's nothing wrong with it. If two 15-year-olds are together, does that mean that the relationship has to end when one of them turns 16, yet can start again when they both are 16?

When I was courting in 1959 my girlfriend was 12 and I was 17 and her father turned into a sort of monster, he forbid her to have any contact with me but we did for 5 yrs, the police were involved,and it goes on.

27 yrs later we are happily married so there.

Originally posted by John
OK - I did watch corrie tonight... between martin and whats her name.

So, what is an acceptable age gap between 2 adults who are a couple?

5 year? 10? 20?

I suppose a 10 year gap sounds worst between a 16 year old and 26 year old - but 30 and 40 doesn't sound too bad.

Why is a bloke called a perv when hes older in this case and she is known as having a toy boy which doesn't sound as bad?

I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 20. 12 years gap but we're totally happy with each other and our age never even comes into it. I think it's all down to maturity at the end of the day.

Originally posted by snoutie
I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 20. 12 years gap but we're totally happy with each other and our age never even comes into it. I think it's all down to maturity at the end of the day.

Well, and legality of course.

Hehe...Of course!