hey just another quick question, im only 11 weeks pregnant and already my mother in law is talking about taking my baby every weekend which i dont want, she is really 'involved' lets say and is really pushing me to go back to work after 4 mnths, i really dont want to as i want to be around my baby to see its first steps and words. she also gets very angry and very defensive when i try to tell her nicely to back off a little. is there any way to tell her without hurting her feelings, she wants to be at the birth and i really dont want that

I suspect this is the first grandchild? Maybe not but I had the same problem. After a few months of the incredibly helpful In-law turning up at all hours and taking baby out to show 'her friends' I had to put my foot down and remind her who gave birth :hihi:

Mine also turned up at the birth without an invite (even my own mother wasn't there!) If you want it to be just you and your partner write it in your birth plan and tell EVERYONE!

You need to be honest and straight. best advice I can give is tell her that you are really excited about becoming a parent and want to spend as much time as possible with your baby so you can learn how to become a little family.

Limit the visits, or give her an afternoon slot once or twice a week to take the little one out for a while to give you a break, it can be quite nice also to have that support and respite - so long as you set ground rules and establish exactly who is the mummy here.

M-in Laws often see the birth of a new generation as the final signal that their 'little boy' has finally grown up, and tend to foist their attentions onto the next generation.

Lets not forget without 'her' baby wouldn't be here ;) (joke but you get where I'm coming from)

thanks, i no it may sound really silly but she has totally different morals and parenting skills to what i have and will have, im just very worried not only about her having the baby when its little but when its slightly older to as she keeps very inappropriate toys that are on display in the bathroom and i really dont want to have to explain to a toddler what it is, it scares me!!! theres a lot of subjects i would like to broach with her but dont want to upset her. i have already been told that if i dont have an epidural i will die!!! ( a little dramatic but still) and hat i shouldnt breast feed because it will make my breast saggy. im very aware thats her opinion but i would much rather have my babies health come before my looks. yes it is my first baby and i think the fact that im 19 may be a factor for the drama.
it sounds really funny but its very difficult as u probably can imagine

I totally empathise.

I was frowned upon for Breastfeeding as it restricted the amount of time my child was away from me (yes I could have expressed but it worked fine for my purpose)

I was constantly criticised for my parenting skills and to some extent still am :roll: as I am quite a liberal parent and have always been in the school of a bit of muck won't kill 'em and let them climb the flippin tree (they can only fall out once) :hihi:

Where as my M-in-L cossets my children, hates the idea of them having any independence and freedom and puts the fear of god in them with tales of child snatchers and drug users.

But she is going to be grandma, she will be excited and she has rights too and you need to sit down and have a grown up chat with her before baby comes. If she pitches a fit and goes ballistic, she will calm down. You and your partner are the parents and you are in control at the end of the day.

Tell her your concerns and worries (embarrassing as it could be) and with regard to 'toys' *snigger snigger I'm sure if you asked her nicely she would remove them to a more private place when the time came.

i really hope so because at the moment shes acting a bit like a teenager, calling me in the middle of the night drunk lol
she just worries me sometimes as i am totally against drugs and when i met my fiance he was smoking a lot of cannabis he has been stopped 2 years now but when he gets a bit stressed from work she offers to buy him some which really annoys me or she will buy him alcohol and its hard to trust her not to be so easy on my child. from the age of 13 when she found out he was smoking she would let him do it in his room, obviously it led into other things but he has eventually grown out of but it must be very hard for him when his own mother offers to buy him it, it sounds a really silly worry but ive been brought up to stay away from all drugs and i didnt always get what i wanted when i wanted it so this is hard for me to accept and the more i ask her to stop the more she seems to do it, you will probably understand my worries far better than a lot do as you are a parent yourself, i just think when im tryin to talk to people about it they think im being totally irrational but please tell me if you think so

Haylic, your last post put a totally different slant on things.

Drugs and alcohol have no place in the family home in the manner to which you describe, you do have every right to be worried. You need to be firm and sensible when you speak with her, tell her how you intend your family to run, the rules and the boundaries and also tell her you hope she respects you for this.

If she's such a free spirit she may go barmy but should come around to your way of thinking if she wants to be part of this growing family.

You can still involve her in baby but in a controlled way on your terms such as visits to your home or trips out together as a family, I do feel for you and you are not being irrational. I had/have acquaintances who smoked weed but they respected the fact that they didn't do it before or during visits to my house and still do.

Its all about respect for individual feelings. You can't change your MIL but you can manipulate circumstances so that everyone gets the best deal and most of all so you can be a confident and happy new mum.

Its a big change in anyone's life and you don't need the added stress of keeping a balance between family members. You're partner should be more active in telling his mum what you both find unacceptable rather than you having to anyway.

and why am I the only one giving any advice :huh::hihi:

obviously because your very good at it thank you i really appreciate it x

you are most welcome Haylic and if you ever need a chat send me a PM :)

and why am I the only one giving any advice :huh::hihi:

because yr good at it.

it sounds like she wants to give birth for you, maybe some where she feels like she can rectify her mistakes as a parent,
as fox says write a birth plan and point it out to midwife thats how you want it, they will do what they can to follow it, its you giveing birth. i may be wrong but thought family except birthing partner wasn't allowed in labour suite during the birth:huh: i know my parents had to wait outside till i'd given birth and they asked me first if i wanted them in so soon after but that was 10 yrs ago.
its your baby and do what you feel comfortable doing.

because yr good at it.

it sounds like she wants to give birth for you, maybe some where she feels like she can rectify her mistakes as a parent,
as fox says write a birth plan and point it out to midwife thats how you want it, they will do what they can to follow it, its you giveing birth. i may be wrong but thought family except birthing partner wasn't allowed in labour suite during the birth:huh: i know my parents had to wait outside till i'd given birth and they asked me first if i wanted them in so soon after but that was 10 yrs ago.
its your baby and do what you feel comfortable doing.

lol - tell that to me who was laid there legs akimbo in blinking agony when in walked MIL to sit in the corner with a birdseye view of the business end. Daddy said after the event "well you never asked her to leave" :roll: Like, I was busy at the time!

:hihi::hihi: all water under the bridge though but seeing as she hadn't even seen me in my underwear this was a bridge too far :P

(ps: that was nearly 13 yrs ago)

and why am I the only one giving any advice :huh::hihi:

Cause it's all good advice so far :hihi:

Agree fot20 you have given some good advice but I think what needs to be done now is use a firm hand.

Don’t pussy foot around tell the women your having as long as possible off after giving birth because

your going to be breast feeding (if you can don’t beet yourself up if you cant)
Your entitled to it
You might need 9 months to get used to the sleepless nights (joke)
You don’t want to go back to work
She aint looking after the baby whilst at work so you need as long off

You may need to be cruel to be kind and say you don’t want her in the labour room you can always make something up that you can only have your partner in, You haven’t mentioned your mom you might want her in instead. I decided I wouldn’t cope with my mother being there so said I didn’t want anyone in other the my husband - I did have one of my sister as support however in case they needed to do emergency stuff thought she had been through it and would be more supportive than dh who would panic.

I think you need to address the situation now with regards to drugs and alcohol if you don’t want your baby around it don’t leave the baby with her make her come to you and stop in now in your home. You can do this and your within your rights to do it if she doesn’t like it tough she won’t come round. If your relying on the women looking after your baby you may want to look at alternatives (work patterns, childcare etc) not easy I know but it is worrying you and it will only get worse.

If all else fails what has your other half said can’t he have a quit word?

Cause it's all good advice so far :hihi:

I'd give plenty of advice too, but most of mine would involve ACME-branded rockets, express trains and falling anvils.

All I would say is that you can set the ground rules for your mother in law whenever you like, and you're going to have to sooner or later, but never make threats that you aren't prepared to carry through, and stick to EVERYTHING that you say unless there's a very good and rational reason supplied as to why you shouldn't. Be warned though - regardless of how well prepared you are for having your baby, nothing prepares you for it completely - your life will change a lot. With that in mind, I would say that you should only set minor ground rules now (make it clear if you don't want her at the birth, and that you'll get her kicked out if you don't want her there) and that you won't be returning to work until you're ready and that she won't have the baby every weekend. When you have the baby the rules will certainly change as your life will have done - so don't make all the rules now, until you know what your life is like after the birth.

Oh, and breastfeeding doesn't necessarily make your boobs saggier...some people end up with perter boobs, weirdly. Everyone's boobs will fill with milk after birth (well, almost everyone), so everyone's boobs get stretched. Make sure you wear a well-fitting maternity (ie during pregnancy from when your boobs swell) and breastfeeding bra though - that's apparently where a lot of women go wrong. Also, everyone's boobs start getting saggier after the age of 25 (collagen, if you're itnerested, isn't produced after that age...that's why people go wrinkly, too) and as that's the sort of age that lots of ladies have babies, it's often blamed on the wrong thing.

Good luck to you...I'm staying out of this now though, as I don't have anything positive to say about mothers in law.

bcx

I rather like the idea of moving house, I'd go mad if that was happening to me.
My approach would be as above - sit down, have a chat and lay the ground rules, otherwise you are likely to spend a whole lot of time being miserable because someone else is controlling what you do and how you do it.
Do it now and prevent misery later, or suffer lots of misery and then still have to do it eventually (and they'll then be confused about why it was ok until then).
So, cos I can be a wimp at times I'd just move :D Easy way out.
The big chat is the more mature way!

I'd give plenty of advice too, but most of mine would involve ACME-branded rockets, express trains and falling anvils.

All I would say is that you can set the ground rules for your mother in law whenever you like, and you're going to have to sooner or later, but never make threats that you aren't prepared to carry through, and stick to EVERYTHING that you say unless there's a very good and rational reason supplied as to why you shouldn't. Be warned though - regardless of how well prepared you are for having your baby, nothing prepares you for it completely - your life will change a lot. With that in mind, I would say that you should only set minor ground rules now (make it clear if you don't want her at the birth, and that you'll get her kicked out if you don't want her there) and that you won't be returning to work until you're ready and that she won't have the baby every weekend. When you have the baby the rules will certainly change as your life will have done - so don't make all the rules now, until you know what your life is like after the birth.

Oh, and breastfeeding doesn't necessarily make your boobs saggier...some people end up with perter boobs, weirdly. Since everyone's boobs will fill with milk after birth (well, almost everyone), so everyone's boobs get stretched. Make sure you wear a well-fitting maternity (ie during pregnancy from when your boobs swell) and breastfeeding bra though - that's apparently where a lot of women go wrong. Also, everyone's boobs start getting saggier after the age of 25 (collagen, if you're itnerested, isn't produced after that age...that's why people go wrinkly, too) and as that's the sort of age that lots of ladies have babies, it's often blamed on the wrong thing.

Good luck to you...I'm staying out of this now though, as I don't have anything positive to say about mothers in law.

bcx

Agree with all of this my boobs haven't gone south since having a baby ) I did only breast feed for a couple of weeks then stopped due to infection and re established a couple of week later for about a month until health visitor made me feel like a bad mother.

Something in the pp about mil having baby every weekend me and dh went out nearly every night befor Emma cam along + 6 years trying - now we go out about 1/2 a fortnight and have practiced for number 2 about 7 times in 12 months (kids are the best form of birth controll):hihi:

Good luck to you...I'm staying out of this now though, as I don't have anything positive to say about mothers in law.

bcx

lol - and I was trying to be so constructive .. but you are right BC :P

you guys are great! as for the moving away tried and tested method!!! she moved with us and even asked to move in with us! that is where i put my foot down.
my mum will not be in the delivery room with me. this is something just my partner and i should share on our own, hes so excited i think he thinks his mothers ways are normal and he seems to think im exaggerating. im definitely not, its very hard to try and say something to her because she always pulls the i have done so much for you card and then goes into a full on personality attack.
she said something to me the other day that made me laugh, she said i really want you to have a girl cos ill love it more!!! now its put me in a position where i wuld rather have a boy, on my partners side the last girl they had is now nearly 33 so you can imagine the house full i would have untill the novelty had wore off and believe me it will with them!
i think my greatest fear in all of this is not being able to bond with our baby bgecause shes has been waiting outside the delivery room and will come in and take the baby off me. i no it sounds stupid but afterwards it will be a very special time for me and dan and i want us to have time with the baby without anyone rushing in to take it away within minutes!
i think somethings going to have to be said and soon so she can get the kicking off out of the way

At least at the hospital you should have some control over the situation. Get on side with the nursing staff, etc and explain to them why you don't want visitors for however long. They should be able to refuse admittance to your in laws, and do it so that they think it is hospital rules, or because the baby has to be checked over, or you have to have a rest, etc.

I agree with others that you need to start laying the ground rules now. Calmly, and without being drawn into a row - if a row starts, take control and leave, calmly saying you don't need to argue while pregnant.
Find excuses to wedge people you don't want hanging around too much out now so they get used to spending less time with you before the baby is born...you need a nap, you feel sick, you have an appointment, you want a bit of time alone with your OH while you can - it doesn't have to be confrontational, learn to be sly about it.

Good luck with it all.:)

thank you, i think i will definitely do that. i really dont want to fall out with her or upset her for my fiance sake, but im gonna have to try

She said i really want you to have a girl cos ill love it more!!!

Ooo that brought memories flooding back.

I always recall the disappointment in my MIL when on the way home from the hospital she commented that her step daughter was due soon maybe she can produce a girl! :o

Foxy xx

Pround mum to two strapping young boys :hihi:

haha arent MIL lovely! Im not fussy what i have it would be very loved by mummy and daddy either way! my parents are great! my stepdad is only 28 and hes going to be a grandad and hes very proud of it!!!!

haha arent MIL lovely! Im not fussy what i have it would be very loved by mummy and daddy either way! my parents are great! my stepdad is only 28 and hes going to be a grandad and hes very proud of it!!!!

christ, i became a mum at 28, can't imagine having become a grandparent already! eeek!

Its hilarious i thought he would be horrified but hes really happy, hes 16 year younger than my mum and hes great more like a dad to me than my biological father! my little sister is only 5 and is already offering to babysit so who needs MILs!!! my wedding was booked for cyprus next year and i have had to postpone this will be much better!!!

All I would say is be VERY careful when it comes to who looks after the little one, for how long, and why. As an ex single Dad it would have been very easy to buy into the whole let parents or whoever play a big part in looking after the little one (who is now 6 and as gorgeous as ever by the way) but I made the decision that I didn't want anyone involed who didn't share the same ideals as me. No problem with others spending time with him, oe having him for an afternoon or whatever - but the 'care' component was mine and mine alone. And, believe me, I am so thankful that I went it alone, because now my parents are finally accepting of the fact that they do not know better than me, and if they want to look after him they do so in a way that I have my say in, not just in any old way they fancy - which they still do with my sibling's children. It's not a control thing (I don't think) but life can get very difficult if parents and in laws get to a stage where it is almost as if they are the parents - this can be very stressful for all and can't be good for the little ones. Think ahead is all I am saying - and all the above aside, you won't want to let the little one out of sight for more than, say, five seconds at a time anyway if you're anything like me! Good luck, put your foot down, and never compromise!

thank you its great to have that perspective from a single dad, you guys dont get enough credit!

Haylic - please try to resolve this issue prior to the baby beign born.

I had issues with my in-laws regarding baby when I was pregnant and I didn't sort it out.

The problems ampified after my little one was born and my relationship with my in-laws became very painful in following few years and it drove a wedge between my partner and myself. Took some painful straight talking from me and the in-laws to try to resolve things. Still problems but I no longer want to kill them! :o;)

yeah definitely, it came to a bit of a breaking point last night where i toild her if she didnt stop trying to tell my fiance to take drugs then i didnt want her to be around our baby, she blew off as predicted and i just left her to carry on the dramatics but it was no argument, i was being polite, i wasnt nasty or bad tempered she just blows up, she veen called my mum to tell her what i had said, which is slightly immature, so now im just going to leave her to it she knows how i feel. im not sure theres much else i can do but both my partner and i agree to leave her to it as she was so out of order yesterday

i sent you a pm hun, as your not the only one with mother in law troubles. i didnt read the whole post prior to pming, and as the others have said drugs and alchohol put a whole different slant on things. but i think the earlier you can put your foot down the better it will be for you!!! good luck again!

the MIL is driving me insane!!!! prior to her little dramatics the other day she has not said im going to be a bad mum and i wont be able to cope! the cheek! if i wasnt so worried bout other stuff i would tell her a few home truths about her parenting skills, she even offered my boyfriend money to buy drugs yesterday as he will apparently need it living with me! oooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh im getting soooo angry now, im just trying to keep it under control for my partners sake none of this is fair on him or baby

Oh dear. Sounds like your OH needs to step in and take the flak for a while. Is he controlled by his mum or is he strong enough to stand up to her and tell her a few home truths?

it just occured - your MIL is basically a drug pusher, trying to get your partner to succumb to a habit. Personally i'd be inclined to not allow any access to your baby whatsoever unless she can keep her lifestyle choices to herself. Is she into other things aswell? Her behaviour sounds distinctly at odds to any dope fiends i've ever known well. How is her mental health? There's extremely strong evidence linking weed and schizophrenia...

i dnt no dan seems to be very reluctant to say anything to his mum as he thinks her behaviour is normal, she doesnt do drugs but she thinks it helps my partner as opposed to hinders but thats ok but she doesnt have to live with it anymore, my partner found it incredibly difficult to stop drugs and has now finally beaten it, its got to be so difficult tho wen people are offering it to you. i think the hardest thing for him was that when he met me i was sooo against drugs and he has never been told that it was bad.

to help you understand why im reluctant to have her around me while im pregnant and the baby is because dan started smoking weed at 13, she found out a year later and let him smoke it in the house she never once told him it was bad, she carried on giving him money and it progressed to ectasy and cocaine, all funded by her. she knew all this and never once put her foot down with him. when i met dan he was hardly doing anything, just the odd smoke, but i dont like it and he was ready to stop so he stopped it was really hard for him but he did it.
i have really questioned her morals and how she could let her son get into something like that, if my children ever come home stoned they wont be going out for weeks and all access to money would be stopped, surely that would have been a better option.
it worries me that when our baby arrives and gets a bit older she will be so nonchalent about the whole thing tht they wont see it as bad.
this is why im so annoyed by the fact that she has the cheek to call me a bad parent and say i wont cope.
it would be so hard to cut her out altogether i dont want to make this any harder on dan but at the moment its hard to cope with this kind of thing, it must be killing him to say no to what was an addiction so im more worried bout him than me and baby as i no ill be fine if she stays away and for the moment it looks like she will

I f I am understanding this correctly - your issues with your mother-in-law will not go until your partner is no longer dependent on her for the drugs.
I think he needs to try to sort himself out as he can not supporting you and your baby 100%until this is resolved. Onc ehe is strong enough to be able to talk to his mother as an equal then things can be addressed and resolved.

I am sorry cos' this sounds very harsh but whilst you mother-in-law is his drug provider, he is going to allow her to say whatever she wants cos' he needs his drugs.

I f I am understanding this correctly

mother-in-law is his drug provider, he is going to allow her to say whatever she wants cos' he needs his drugs.

You misunderstood Sam, her partner is an ex user, but she is trying to encourage him to lapse.

yeah he is an ex user his mother seems to want him to use because as long as hes not bothering her she doesnt care what he does but thinks its ok to control me

i dnt no dan seems to be very reluctant to say anything to his mum as he thinks her behaviour is normal, she doesnt do drugs but she thinks it helps my partner as opposed to hinders but thats ok but she doesnt have to live with it anymore, my partner found it incredibly difficult to stop drugs and has now finally beaten it, its got to be so difficult tho wen people are offering it to you. i think the hardest thing for him was that when he met me i was sooo against drugs and he has never been told that it was bad.

to help you understand why im reluctant to have her around me while im pregnant and the baby is because dan started smoking weed at 13, she found out a year later and let him smoke it in the house she never once told him it was bad, she carried on giving him money and it progressed to ectasy and cocaine, all funded by her. she knew all this and never once put her foot down with him. when i met dan he was hardly doing anything, just the odd smoke, but i dont like it and he was ready to stop so he stopped it was really hard for him but he did it.
i have really questioned her morals and how she could let her son get into something like that, if my children ever come home stoned they wont be going out for weeks and all access to money would be stopped, surely that would have been a better option.
it worries me that when our baby arrives and gets a bit older she will be so nonchalent about the whole thing tht they wont see it as bad.
this is why im so annoyed by the fact that she has the cheek to call me a bad parent and say i wont cope.
it would be so hard to cut her out altogether i dont want to make this any harder on dan but at the moment its hard to cope with this kind of thing, it must be killing him to say no to what was an addiction so im more worried bout him than me and baby as i no ill be fine if she stays away and for the moment it looks like she will

People do have different views on the use of drugs. That doesn't mean that either of you are right or wrong, but since it's your child it's your decision.
Grandma's attitude towards drug use isn't one that most children would pick up on I don't think, it's not like she's going to actively try and push drugs to them.... I hope.

Hi; Im 24 weeks pregnant, and MIL..Don't even go there. She wanted to buy us our pram. but we had one given to us for VERY cheap. She got the face on. She offered to buy moses basket & stand. We've had a brand new stand given to us. She got the face on. She complains about everything. And has already decorated the smallest bedroom in her house pink, put a cot in there etc. (Im having a boy) She's already made comments to my bro-in-laws OH as to "Hopefully you can give me a girl" [Bro in law partner is 15.] Im only 16 myself but ive had no ends of "chats" with his partner as too "Do not get pregnant" MIL's i think will always interfere, as much as she can, to see your bursting point. She's found where mine is. :D Be very firm with her. Tell her, that YOU are the one with the morning sickness, with the huge bump on the way, with the stretch marks etc. Don't pussy-foot around her. I don't with mine anymore. Before I used to say Ok. But now ive found my voice and using it! She wanted to be at the birth, so I made some story as to "Only allowed two people in the room" Which'll be partner and MY mum. [I don't know how many can be in the room] She's already speaking about when im recovering if hosp would let her take baby home with her????? Ive spoken to my MW about this and she's told me that when ive had bub to leave a note at reception desk as to "MIL stay away" LOL. Ive already gotten a list as to "Who can see me, when ive had bubs" And I can tell you now it's going to be left at reception desk!!!!

I think you should put your foot down! Tell her that she can buy things and coo over tiny shoes but she cannot make you do anything you dont want to do!

:D Good luck hunni xxx

Don't worry Gina, you have to enter the wards at Jessop via an intercom! So she won't be able to wander in! And the baby stays with you at all times, only you can take him or her home. Get her to buy you a large supply of nappies or a nice comfy feeding chair instead - they can't help wanting to butt in a bit :)

Hi Mathom. I know you have to press the ward buzzer thingy. MW Said if you have a list, they'll ask the name of the person before they open the door's. So, if the name is on my unwanted list, they don't open the doors. My MW seems to understand my situation so i'm feeling loads better! she's giving me tips on how to say no without saying no. LOL. That is exactly what we are asking people now lol! If they want to get us anything, get wipe's or nappy sacks or nappies. But now we're overloaded with newborn size 1 nappies..so we've got to tell people to go for bigger sizes! A comfy feeding chair? HAHA She won't do that..that means I am comfortable! She hate's me. She has from day one. My hair colour you see [Im ginger] his side of the family hate me! Even though ive tryed and tryed to get on. They won't have it. Only his nan (His dads mum) likes me.
I know they can't help themselves but I sometimes feel like saying "You have been through two pregnancies, you've got to know that sometimes you want it to be 'your' time" But if I say anything she falls out with my OH for about 3 weeks. Then he feels like I hate his family! Can't win sometimes! We've settled on her buying us cot bedding and moses basket. My family know, even if they see it very cheap, NOT TO BUY IT! lol.

ARGHHH I wish someone could help me...Feels like no-one has been through/going through the same thing as me!

ARGHHH I wish someone could help me...Feels like no-one has been through/going through the same thing as me!

Trust me, you are not alone, us girlies have had it tough!

:D Glad im not the only one!! And im only 24 weeks...feels like ive been to hell and back with my MIL. :( Keeps telling me "I should get a weekend job" when bubs is born..And my OH can look after bubs when I work..I feel like asking her if she was asleep during her labour and childbirth!!!!! Cause everyone says your tierd for months after! :(:( Jeez..I really need my mates to winge on...but ive got non left! HAHA! they all hate me cause im more into spending the day in mothercare than topshop. x

dont worry gina im in the same boat so you got me to talk to!!! as for topshop they dont stock maternity clothes!!!!

:) I know topshop don't do maternity. :S

Did not read the whole thread, but since when does topshop not do maternity clothes anymore?

I know I could not find any in town but in Meadowhall they were in the left back corner last time I looked.

Tell her to sod off and mind her own business. She had the chance when she had her own kids. Follow your own instincts and let obnoxious pratts like her sit in her house thinking its cool to get her son drugs.

loving that post WW its just rite, hopefully she knows to back off since i threw a hissy fit the other day!!

loving that post WW its just rite, hopefully she knows to back off since i threw a hissy fit the other day!!

Ahem yes sorry about that. That was the polite version as i was in a bit of a rage about other stuff at the time. Glad you sorted it out though. Dont let morons like her get you down. :)

oh it definitley wont from now on ive stood my ground and im saying there this is my baby not hers!!!!

Congrats on the pregnancy haylic,
I had a few little problems with my MIL, I can see that plain talking does not always work, but it sounds like your OH has to make a stand for you and his baby. it is his mother and he should have to deal with it

oh its just gone down hill in a big way me and my OH have had a massive argument about it and its at breaking point, why is it never easy?!

I am so sorry to hear that haylic, but find out what he has to argue about, then talk to him about why you feel the way you do. unfortunatly arguing never solves anything unless you can talk in a clam way afterwards and sort things out.

I think im possibly going to commit murder soon!!!!! lol MIL called at 12-30 last night when drunk for no particular reason and then again at 7 this morning. Is there any beeping need!!!! she knows ive been ill all week and still does it. i honestly think shes trying to drive me insane!!!!