Time to ban umbrellas on the street?

There's all this talk in the media about banning people from carrying knives and guns and yet it appears perfectly legal to carry one of the most dangerous weapons imaginable. I refer of course to the umbrella.

Over the course of a 5 minute walk from the station to work today (in Leeds) I narrowly escaped having my eyes poked out on no fewer than 8 occasions; each time it was some clueless woman (and it always seems to be women) with a complete lack of awareness of anyone walking near her. You also run the risk of whiplash from ducking out of the way to avoid them, and you daren't say anything to anyone cause they could potentially take their umbrella down and stab you with it.

What on earth is so bad about getting wet anyway? It wakes you up, makes you feel more alive and, if you work or shop down the markets it's the nearest thing you'll get to a wash all year!

So let's ban umbrellas and create a safer and fresher society for all!

I missed your posts to cheer up my day at work basil. :hihi:

Here here! This menace must be brought under control. I blame that Um-bu-rella (ella) woman myself...let's start an online petition and a march on Downing Street. Down with the umbrellas!

Cleaner lower class people and reduced risk of umbrella induced eye injuries..

Sir, I back your ban.

The amount of times I had my eye nearly removed by shorter people with erect umbrellas is unbelievable. Guns, knives, gang violence has nothing on the surge of manacing umbrellas. Ban em, I say!!!

So how about an umbrella amnesty?

All those handed in could be sent to Africa for use as sunshades.

I've noticed it is always women who nearly blind you, men seem to be more capable of using an umbrella safely.

But what will Mary Poppins do then?

So how about an umbrella amnesty?

All those handed in could be sent to Africa for use as sunshades.

Because then they would get all their eyes poked out by the brollies and they wouldnt need to use them as sunshades:hihi:

But what will Mary Poppins do then?

Get a bus like the rest of us.

Trust me, when you're sat at Donington Park all day in the puring rain, you'll consider the umbrella to be the greateset invention ever!

That aside though, I do agree that woman are incapable of using an umbrella safely.

I don't think so....the umbrella police have already got their claws in......look at a typical woman's umbrella, small foldable with a nice blunt end so it fits nicely (if somewhat wet) into a handbag....now look at a blokes umbrella.....tall, sturdy with a great big SPIKE on it.....now what I say is do the umbrella police not trust us women with big sturdy umbrellas with SPIKES.....are they worried in case in a fit of PMT rage we skewer some unsuspecting irritating person on the end of our brollies.....too damn right....and if I find that horrible little person who IS the umbrella police I am going to set about him with my brolly....and yes I have a nice big bloke's one......with a great big spike on it....so beware!!!!!