I've just been to Morrisons, who are selling "Jazz Apples" (they're apples). What a fantastic euphemism; "a swift kick in the jazz apples, and he was on the floor in agony". I think it's a beauty and intend to use it as much as possible - let's get it into the English language!!

Another one for you: Tuesday night is gay night in Barnsley's pubs and bars, so someone can be described as "he goes out Tuesdays". Still not as good as Julian Clary's washing machine advert, though - "I've never been much good with front loaders" :hihi: :hihi:

Woolpacker - a gentleman who is happiest when in the company of sheep.

"T'old John? Aye, I saw 'im t'other day 'erdin' 'is sheep. 'E's a reyt woolpacker that one"

I work with students and one was very annoyed with another student because she thought she was getting better treatment because the male lecturers found her attractive. The student I saw couldn't get her words out because she was so annoyed:
' Just because she's got blonde hair and big - you know - and legs all the way up to... all the way up to (I am waiting with a straight face for her to finish)... LA LA LAND!!!'

Marvellous. I like Jazz Apples too. (So to speak.)

I work with students and one was very annoyed with another student because she thought she was getting better treatment because the male lecturers found her attractive. The student I saw couldn't get her words out because she was so annoyed:
' Just because she's got blonde hair and big - you know - and legs all the way up to... all the way up to (I am waiting with a straight face for her to finish)... LA LA LAND!!!'

Marvellous. I like Jazz Apples too. (So to speak.)

Classic! I'm laughing out loud right now :hihi:

Did you manage to keep a straight face or not?

I personally am quite fond of 'wefty' as coined by a friend of mine who became confused between weighty and hefty. Used as in 'cooo that linford christie don't half have a wefty package'. :hihi:

An absolute coup! Shaun Keaveny (one of radio's finest broadcasters) this morning on BBC 6 Music declared that jazz apples is "one of the best euphemisms I've ever heard" :banana::banana::banana:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/mainframe.shtml?http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/6music_aod.shtml?6music/6m_shaun_thu

it's about 21 minutes in, so you can skip forward 20 mins. if you want.