It just terrifies me. hospitals freak me out. I am 29 weeks today. has anyone tried hypnotherapy??
I have always been a size 8, am 5ft2". and I think. how on earth am I gonna get through it. I thought about epidural, anything for pain relief. my midwife said the head is where it should be at the moment, low down. I cant help thinking Im going to go in labour, much early on.

...that makes you perfectly normal!

sending you a pm.

bcx

Hi beth,

I am pregnant too, got quite a while to wait for the labour though. I am too scared of the labour! I have always been put off getting pregnant because of it, I thought I would never have children. I also have a very bad phobia of being sick and sick! Luckily I have not been sick yet (Touch wood!)

I think when it happens you won't be thinking about it like you are now, your mind will be on other things :| You will be fine! just think how many people do it, more than once! My sister is a bit of a wuss, she has done it 4 times :hihi: It can't be that bad if she keeps doing it.

I am also thinking of having the epidural, I havn't looked it up much yet. I have heard a few bad stories about it but you do about almost everything!

Try not to worry yourself too much, you will just make things worse! Just keep thinking about all the people what do it over and over again!

Good luck!! :)

water births are fantastic, btw - incredibly supportive, so much so that i didnt' even feel some of my contractions, and it keeps you a nice temperature when the weather outside is too hot/cold for your liking!

Hi I felt extremely anxious about my first labour in that Iwas convinced (more than normal) something terrible would happen to my baby. I tried a 3 hour hypnotherapy session I heard about through Jessops to try and have more positivethoughts about it. Other women there were worried about the pain.I found it really helpful- learned lots of strategies tocombat negativethoughts.We were taught lots of ways of getting through pain etc and we watched some births on a tv. I was given a cd to listen to everyday up to the birth. I think that was important even though somedays you don't feel like it! Anyway,I did feel calm about the birth ( I was induced) despite it beinga bit hairy at the end and had faith in myself. I felt I could cope withany eventualityso I would recommend it. Also I think there's pressure on women to go into labour without drugs but they are there for a reason- to relieve pain! Remember the important thing is the beautiful baby you're going to get. I can'tremember the clinic I went to but will find out foryou if you would like. It was Kenwood area in NEther Edge

I have no personal experience to add, I had a c-section but I can only relay the things which made a difference to me when I was fearful. Plus a couple of things which might help more.

1, women have been doing this for thousands of years and what's more they KEEP doing it, even after some of the more difficult births so it can't be so bad.
2, Your body is especially designed to do this and has all the facilities to do so and with maximum assistance from the brain.
3, There are two ladies who come to Jellytots who are so slender I can't imagine it was ever possible for them to give birth. Both of them have fab little boys and relatively easy birth stories to tell.
4, A good friend of mine has always been extremely petite and had her first child 4 years ago, a simple 4 hour labour and natural birth. She's now carrying her second and due any day.
5, another sickening slim friend had a little boy 3 weeks ago, she's always been an 8 - 10 and had a 9 hour labour and simple birth, no stitches, no tears nothing! He was her third too!

You can opt for a home birth to clear yourself of the hospital issue but then your pain relief is reduced, however, homebirths are meant to be shorter and less traumatic overall.

You can do it, yes it will hurt but you will forget most of the pain very quickly and what's more when it's over the pain stops straight away, the issues relating to shildbirth are mostly in the immediate so you only have one goal to achieve and by then your baby will be there and nothing else will matter! Even when the placenta arrives.

I hope you don't feel partronised, these were the things I kept telling myself. Later on I was just scared cos I knew I would have a c-section anyway so all the other fears were irrelevent.

It just terrifies me. hospitals freak me out. I am 29 weeks today. has anyone tried hypnotherapy??
I have always been a size 8, am 5ft2". and I think. how on earth am I gonna get through it. I thought about epidural, anything for pain relief. my midwife said the head is where it should be at the moment, low down. I cant help thinking Im going to go in labour, much early on.

hi there, as someone who has experienced a lot of fear in their life i can really relate to how you may be feeling. i have found ways to work creatively with high levels of fear and now have very little fear in my life (apart from what i percieve to be normal levels about normal stuff). With something like labour it is easy to see it as a big nasty thing, and for our brains to not get much further than that but when you try and break it down, imagining the different stages and all the different things that may happen it may see more bearable, seeing it more as a flow of events. and the most important part of it all is that you have control, not only because it is you giving birth and your body is designed to be capable of such an amazing feat, but also that wherever it is possible our health service tries to put you in control.

Have you read all about labour, or seen it on film? that may help although it seems like the opposite of what you may want. therapies like NLP and hypnotherapy can help and will reaffirm that you are powerful and in control, certainly recieving training in hypnobirthing could make a real difference to your birth experience http://www.hypnobirthing.co.uk/ . I guess you are doing Antenatal classes too, which will help. What's really important is that you are able to voice your fears at this stage in your pregnancy which will give you enough time to find/learn strategies to be able to engage with your labour in a way that will be rewarding, rather than seeing it as a frightening experience. My sister says that she never realised she would feel so powerful as the moment she gave birth, she felt invincible.

It will hurt, but pain is pain, it will be very horrible but it will pass and fade over hours and days and you will have a beautiful baby to show for it.

incidentally my friend is tiny, a natural size 6 and i mistakenly imagined she would struggle with labour. she gave birth 2 weeks ago and was only in labour for four hours and needed no intervention.

good luck with it, you are capable of far more than you can ever imagine :)

good luck with it, you are capable of far more than you can ever imagine :)

I have to second that...
i was 19 when i had my little boy and was absolutely terrified,he was 2 weeks late and i had to be induced and i honestly thought that i wouldnt get through it,he was 8lb 4 and it was bad but it was worth it as soon as i saw him.
My little girl was 8lb 7 and she was much easier,nearly had her in the car..lmao, just got to the hospital with 5 mins to spare.
Youll get through it tho try not to worry yourself too much.
Keep us all informed how it goes..:thumbsup:

sarah xx

water births are fantastic, btw - incredibly supportive, so much so that i didnt' even feel some of my contractions, and it keeps you a nice temperature when the weather outside is too hot/cold for your liking!

BC, did you waterbirth at home or in hospital? The more I read on it, the more I am inclined to go for waterbirth, but I also want to be at home, away from nasty hospitals.

Hi beth, I feel the same! Scared! VERY SCARED! I'm almost 33 weeks and its all starting to seem very real now. I've opted for a homebirth, purely because I think I'll be more relaxed at home and I dont want to have loads of pain relief - I believe the pain must be there for a reason and if you can't feel when to push, you're more likely to need forceps and an epeasiotomy (sp?) which I REALLY dont want!
I've started on my raspberry leaf tea and next week I'm going to get hubby to start the perinial (sp?) massage.

All I can say is there's no going back, the baby's going to come out - it will be very hard, very painful, but more than likely the happiest day of your life. If you want to pm me for a chat if there's anything I can do to help, also I'll happily post a birth story after the event so you'll have an idea what its like 'on the other side'.

Good look, but remember - stress is the worst thing to have during pregnancy. Giving birth is one of the most natural things the human body does and women have been doing it for centuries. So just try and think of it like that..... x x x

Wait until you're overdue and you'll be so sick of being pregnant you'll look forward to the birth!

Get informed about pain relief - epidurals do totally stop the pain so worth considering. There are down sides being imobile is the biggest but then if you're pain free is that such a hardship?

It's thought that the pain we feel during labour is so that female animals go and find a nice safe place to give birth. I know lots of people will try and convince you it's a positive pain which I suppose it is in the sense that you get a baby at the end, but that doesn't mean having loads of pain relief is a bad thing. I do think some women seem to see it as an achievement giving birth with little pain relief but just because that's fine by them doesn't make you a lesser person if you opt for everything going! Keep an open mind.

Finally you never know you might be like my friends mum who never even realised she was in labour!

I too was absolutely petrified of giving birth, I had only heard horror stories from friends and family. I was 5ft 8" and a size 6/8 and couldn't figure out how on earth I was going to get this baby out, but I can honestly say it wasn't that bad. Have you read the link on birth stories?
I had a 4 hour labour and gave birth to an 8lb 13oz baby only using gas and air. By the time labour comes round you are so focused on getting to meet your baby finally, you do everything the m/w's say and before you know it they are laying your little angel on your chest and nothing else matters.
Good luck and pm me if I can help, you want a chat or if you have any questions you want honestly answering. I think that was one thing that I found helpful having someone I could ask anything too even if it sounds stupid and getting an honest and sometimes very graphic answer.

Never fear Beth29, its completely natural to be frightened of the unknown - but trust that your body is going to do exactly what it is designed to do and what millions of women do worldwide every day :) You might not know what to do, but your body will.

Unless you are petite due to malnourishment as a child, or your partner is 6'6", baby will no doubt be in proportion to your size - so yep, its coming down and out through your pelvis! :P :)

Great attitude Jen13kd! :) You'll all be fine and you will cope with whatever birth comes your way :)

.

BC, did you waterbirth at home or in hospital? The more I read on it, the more I am inclined to go for waterbirth, but I also want to be at home, away from nasty hospitals.

at the jessop. i know it's stupid, but i was worried about how much mess a waterbirth at home would make - carpets aren't designed to soak loads of water up, and they had cost us a fortune! that wasn't teh only reason we didn't have the baby at home, but it was one of them. i reckon i might be up for a home water birth next time, though, as it turns out that it's not that messy, and i've been assured that the midwife does all the cleaning up.

it was actually fantastic - midwife came to the house, said it was time for me to go to the jessop, and the waterbath was waiting for me; all i had to do was strip and roll in! you can have gas and air with a waterbirth, or paracodol, but obviously no epidural. i don't think you can have pethidine/morphine if you want to stay in the bath, eitehr.

rather disturbingly, i read something recently which claimed that almost every woman was capable of giving birth to a 12lb+ baby without notable damage to themselves or the baby. eek, quite frankly. larger women were claimed to be ok up to as much as 16lb gulp

don't worry, i'm sure you won't be having a 16lb baby.

rather disturbingly, i read something recently which claimed that almost every woman was capable of giving birth to a 12lb+ baby without notable damage to themselves or the baby. eek, quite frankly. larger women were claimed to be ok up to as much as 16lb gulp

don't worry, i'm sure you won't be having a 16lb baby.

that had to be written by a man babychickens :loopy: :hihi:

Good god, a baby weighing OVER A STONE! That is horrific!

Hi beth,

I am pregnant too, got quite a while to wait for the labour though. I am too scared of the labour! I have always been put off getting pregnant because of it, I thought I would never have children. I also have a very bad phobia of being sick and sick! Luckily I have not been sick yet (Touch wood!)

I think when it happens you won't be thinking about it like you are now, your mind will be on other things :| You will be fine! just think how many people do it, more than once! My sister is a bit of a wuss, she has done it 4 times :hihi: It can't be that bad if she keeps doing it.

I am also thinking of having the epidural, I havn't looked it up much yet. I have heard a few bad stories about it but you do about almost everything!

Try not to worry yourself too much, you will just make things worse! Just keep thinking about all the people what do it over and over again!

Good luck!! :)

Hi, the only think I hate at the moment is I have a bit of Braxton hicks and terrible heartburn. awful.
I have not heard abything about epidural. what horror stories have you heard about it. to be honest I dont really know anyone that I have heard of that has hada nice birth. I know you only hear of the bad ones!!

Hi, the only think I hate at the moment is I have a bit of Braxton hicks and terrible heartburn. awful.
I have not heard abything about epidural. what horror stories have you heard about it. to be honest I dont really know anyone that I have heard of that has hada nice birth. I know you only hear of the bad ones!!

I've heard that epidurals are great if they work. However, there is a chance of losing all sensation long term, especially around your genitals.

Thanks, but no! Not unless it is REALLY needed and I mean REALLY!

I have had the 'pleasure' if thats the right word of bearing two children naturally. The way I dealt with it was 'Its going to happen if I like it or not' and I found that relaxing into the idea helped enormously.

I was lucky that the first part of labour (the long boring bit) was easily managed by distractions. Baths, decorating! (lol), and the second part is hard, nobody who has had natural childbirth will tell you otherwise, but.. its true once that baby pops out nine times out of ten, you forget all that went before because you are too engrossed in your lovely baby.

Good luck, and if it really hurts... ask for drugs :hihi:

beth29.i to was a size 8 and 5.2ft,my first was 9.10lbs
i had a normal delivery,my advise is to relax and listern to what your being told,at the end of the day baby is coming.
if childbirth was so bad then none would have kids.
good luck,and dont worry:)

Hi, the only think I hate at the moment is I have a bit of Braxton hicks and terrible heartburn. awful.
I have not heard abything about epidural. what horror stories have you heard about it. to be honest I dont really know anyone that I have heard of that has hada nice birth. I know you only hear of the bad ones!!

my birth was fine - it was practically pain free, and all i had taken was some paracodol and a birthing pool. my pregnancy, however, was carp. here's an old wife's tale for you - if you have a difficult pregnancy, you'll have an easy birth. believe me, really bad heartburn goes a long way towards making pregnancy difficult, if mine was anything to go by.

Hi

My name is Michelle and I run the Sheffield Homebirth Group. Whether you’ve had/are planning a home birth, or are simply curious, come along and meet women who have had home births, hear their stories and ask questions. It’s very informal and everybody including partners are welcome.

I never thought I would be able to have anymore children after my first traumatic experience in hospital. I started to read about homebirths and realised that this was something I should consider because planning a home birth means less chance of a caesarean section or assisted birth; baby is more likely to be in better condition at birth, and less likely to need help breathing; you are less likely to haemorrhage or need stitches and more likely to use less pain relief.

Who are we?
We are a group of mums who have all given birth at home. We want to pass on the shared knowledge of home birth, so that women can reclaim this knowledge and have more control over their own experience.

We are an independent group although we do have representation from the National Childbirth Trust (NCT), Association for Improvements in the Maternity Services (AIMS), Association of Radical Midwives (ARM) and the National Health Service (NHS).

Who is the group for?
The group is open to anyone with an interest in homebirth and anybody else who is interested in helping women have an easier, comfortable, happy pregnancy and birth experience. For example at a meeting in February a fully qualified, local fitness instructor came to talk to us about her gentle pre natal exercise classes. Somebody has also approached us to talk to the group about hypnobirthing.

How often does the group meet?
Our meetings are held monthly and we have dates scheduled until August. We hold the meetings at members homes located in Intake, Sandygate and Hillsborough.

What do you talk about?
The meetings are very informal where we discuss different issues surrounding home births and everyone shares their inspiring birth stories.

All members of the group have a story to tell and can offer reassurance and information to expectant mums planning home births in similar circumstances e.g. I had a home water birth after caesarean, another lady who attends the group regularly gave birth to twins at home.

We offer support to those who have had previous traumatic experiences and might be looking to home birth so they have more control.

For further information contact:
Michelle - Tel: 0114 2010369, Email mmmbarnes@blueyonder.co.uk
Lynne - Tel: 0114 2306825, Email: lfbunn@yahoo.com
Stella - Tel: 0114 229 4748, Email: stella.elliott@btopenworld.com

i have just started reading "Hypnobirthing; the breakthrough approach to safer, easier, conmfortable birthing" by Marie Mongan. although the techniques may not appeal to some and may seem a bit "way out" to others there is one principle that seems to come up again and again and is borme out by a lot of medical research. Namely the experience of pain in labour is brought about by fear. it makes interesting reading will be influencing how i prepare myself for this major event.
xxx

It just terrifies me. hospitals freak me out. I am 29 weeks today. has anyone tried hypnotherapy??
I have always been a size 8, am 5ft2". and I think. how on earth am I gonna get through it. I thought about epidural, anything for pain relief. my midwife said the head is where it should be at the moment, low down. I cant help thinking Im going to go in labour, much early on.hi beth, im same as you small and short(althou not so small at the min!), i just didnt think about labour at all as its far too scary and when it actually happens you wont care anyway. this time around im def having epi as peth didnt work and gas/air was poo. but everyones different youll know whats right for you when it happens. try going for a massage from 30weeks as it will help loosen bits and bobs. ive just been to Helios clinic at Ponds Forge-hes fab, i felt very comfortable with him and he talked to me about bones, muscles and what exercises to do with hips and back etc..

It just terrifies me. hospitals freak me out. I am 29 weeks today. has anyone tried hypnotherapy??
I have always been a size 8, am 5ft2". and I think. how on earth am I gonna get through it. I thought about epidural, anything for pain relief. my midwife said the head is where it should be at the moment, low down. I cant help thinking Im going to go in labour, much early on.

Don't fret - just remember that childbirth is a natural thing, and your body knows how the baby comes out and won't let it grow so that it can't fit through the opening.
Pain relief is something you need to discuss with your midwife as well as your plans for the birth and after care, but i agree with babychickens - a water birth is more relaxing (though none will be totally pain free!) if you want to do it a more natural way. I had mine like that with just gas and air and believe me if i can do it anyone can!:hihi:

Hi beth29, try not to worry too much, just keep telling yourself that you will get a lovely baby at the end of it all and after all it is only one day out of your life.
I have 2 children and I am 5ft2 as well. With my first child I opted for an epidural which I have to admit was not a pleasent experience, they let a student doctor try to insert it, and when he couldnt the other doctor took over, the relief from the epidural was fantastic, the only down side is obviosly that you are numb and cant feel to push, my son ended up being born by vontouse (not sure how to spell it), which I know sounds scary but I didnt feel a thing because of epidural, the moment they put my son on my chest everything was forgotten and an hour later I was sitting up in bed with cuppa cuddling my newborn son.
When my daughter was born 3 years ago I was a bit nervous about having epidural again but didnt want any injections (scared of being sick ), this time the epidural was much better and I could still feel my legs, unfortunately again I couldnt push this baby out and due to her being distressed was rushed to theatre for c-section which I can honestly say wasnt that bad. At the end of the day I dont think you can plan the birth too much as nature has a funny way of deciding it for you. Good luck and I hope you enjoy your ne w baby when it arrives.

You can of course do a lot to help the pain yourself whilst in labour like moving around, changing positions and perhaps using a birth pool along with some gas and air. I found all these things extremely useful when I gave birth to my son and it was more than just a day out of my life. His birth was one of the most empowering experiences. I will always look back and cherish the day I gave birth to my second child at home in water.

Michelle.
xx

Just to also add that I had an epidural with my first child in hospital and it was the start of a cascade of intervention that ended me up in theatre for an emergency caesarean under general anaethetic. I was determined that any emergency second time around would be because of nature and not because some midwife decided to break my waters just because it's a routine prodedure when you choose to have an epidural at the Jessop Wing. Breaking my waters caused my baby's heart rate to drop. There is loads of evidence which proves that breaking the waters can cause distress for example the British Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology 104: 340-346, Early amniotomy increases the frequency of fetal heart abnormalities, Goffnet F, Fraser W, Marcoux S, Breart G, Moutquin J, Daaris M (1997).


Michelle.
x

You can of course do a lot to help the pain yourself whilst in labour like moving around, changing positions and perhaps using a birth pool along with some gas and air. I found all these things extremely useful when I gave birth to my son and it was more than just a day out of my life. His birth was one of the most empowering experiences. I will always look back and cherish the day I gave birth to my second child at home in water.

Michelle.
xx

Michelle, I think you have misunderstood the meaning behind my coment "It is just a day out of your life". I meant it in the sence that no matter how bad your labour pains and suffering are during the birth of a child it will only last one day which is a small price to pay for the beautifull baby that you will get at the end of it all, well worth all the suffering.I did NOT mean it in the sense of " Hey giving birth is just like any other day in my life" which is the way I think you interpreted my words. (feel free to correct me if I am wrong), giving birth to my 2 children was one of the most fullfilling times in my life if not the most, and I would not change them for the world, they mean everything to me. So I will apologise in advance if this is not how you read my words to mean but when I read your reply you made me feel a bit crap like giving birth to my kids wasnt all that its cracked up to be.

Possibly, Rainbow, though I'm not sure, Michelle meant that it can take rather more than a day for many people, and did for her...not that she thought you were downplaying or denigrating the experience.
I think we all know just what a life changing experience it is for everyone.

Possibly, Rainbow, though I'm not sure, Michelle meant that it can take rather more than a day for many people, and did for her...not that she thought you were downplaying or denigrating the experience.
I think we all know just what a life changing experience it is for everyone.

If that is the case then obviously I will apologise to her but "a day" was an approximate indication of time, one of my births was over 24hrs.

Well apologies have already been made and I would say all advice on this thread has been intended in the nicest possible way.
Personally I had a c-section and I kind of envy the real life experience of a vaginal birth. Maybe I should be grateful of the c-section. With any luck I shall find out the contrast for myself one day!

OOhh did you know Sazaboo had her baby? She might add her birth story on the birth story thread - in fact that thread could be very useful to anyone scared, it's very real.

As a mother of 3, all healthy, 2 over 9lb in weight 1 7lbs and only 5ft tall in height I think I'm qualified to give advice. My first was breech overdue and delivered by epidural and caesarian, the 2nd was bang on time but was delivered by Ventouse (Vacumn) and the 3rd was delivered normally but the Epidural didn't take so I used Gas and Air. I'd rather have epidural, pethidine didn't help and Gas and Air made me sick. Best epidural is one that you can move around with. Don't worry. I asked my mother what labour pains and she said it was like constipation. I think it's more like the cramp you get with gastro enteritis, the difference being with a stomach bug it is at the same level all the time whereas with Labour pains there are spaces in between. I used to wonder why mothers never remembered all the details of giving birth but it is because you are concentrating so much on the labour. I had long labours with the non caesarian and it was tiring and not my favourite experience but nothing to be scared about. The majority of labours are non eventful and once you get over the exhaustion you'll realise it was worth it.