Is your wife or husband jealous of your friends?

Absolutely not.

Absolutely not. Why do you ask, have you had this problem?

In the spectrum of thing your spouse comes above friends and aquaintances.

What you percieve as jealousy, may be just a reaction at yourself wanting to carry on as if you are single may it not?

You cannot have your cake and eat it.

In the spectrum of thing your spouse comes above friends and aquaintances.

What you percieve as jealousy, may be just a reaction at yourself wanting to carry on as if you are single may it not?

You cannot have your cake and eat it.

And if you can actually make head or tail of this post, is there a prize?

And if you can actually make head or tail of this post, is there a prize?

Makes sense to me.

In the spectrum of thing your spouse comes above friends and aquaintances.

What you percieve as jealousy, may be just a reaction at yourself wanting to carry on as if you are single may it not?

You cannot have your cake and eat it.

Would agree with that. Have had recent experience of it as well unfortunately. :(

I would actually go further than spouse and would include serious boyfriend/girlfriend/fiance/fiancee.

And if you can actually make head or tail of this post, is there a prize?

Hope I understood it properly then. :)

No he never has been. He would get the boot if he was.:mad: Mind you if he saw what I wrote on the forum sometimes he might be. ;)

Makes sense to me.

So what do you think it's about then?

So what do you think it's about then?

I think if you are in a happy marrige then your spouse comes before your friends. But i also think it is very important to stay close with your friends.

I think if you are in a happy marrige then your spouse comes before your friends. But i also think it is very important to stay close with your friends.

Well, I kind of think you're right, waxonwaxoff. My partner would never put me in a position where I had to choose between her or friends though fortunately, which is rather brilliant.

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Well, I kind of think you're right, waxonwaxoff. My partner would never put me in a position where I had to choose between her or friends though fortunately, which is rather brilliant.


Well then that is great that you have that good relationship. On the other hand it is all down to circumstance. If your other half had a friend that was devious and did there best to cause trouble would you tell them that you couldnt take anymore and would leave if it didnt stop?

Well then that is great that you have that good relationship. On the other hand it is all down to circumstance. If your other half had a friend that was devious and did there best to cause trouble would you tell them that you couldnt take anymore and would leave if it didnt stop?

Leave the friend or my partner? Can't really imagine her or me having a friend like that. We're not perfect - there's a friend of mine (actually an ex-girlfriend) that my partner isn't mad keen on but it doesn't get in the way of anything between us.

Leave the friend or my partner? Can't really imagine her or me having a friend like that. We're not perfect - there's a friend of mine (actually an ex-girlfriend) that my partner isn't mad keen on but it doesn't get in the way of anything between us.

Well its good that your girfriend is so easy going but some of us arent. If my other half did have a friend like that i would certainly bail out if i had to put up with somthing like that. Then again im single and thats probably why. :hihi:

Used to date a guy who was demanding that I put him before my friends and family.
I wasn't allowed to go out with my mates if he wasn't around.
He was particularly jealous of my two best male friends- one of whom is gay- but he still didn't want me to go out with my girlfriends without him.

Needless to say, I finished with him, it was 8 years ago and thankfully I'm still mates with my two male friends.

I would never, ever allow this to happen again and wouldn't stay with someone who puts me in this situation.

Thankfully my partner does understand how important friendship and wouldn't dream of asking me to choose.
He knows I would leave him then.

I know my partner aint jealouse of my friends,male or female.He gets on with my mates.Which is great.charlie x

Thankfully my partner does understand how important friendship and wouldn't dream of asking me to choose.
He knows I would leave him then.

He is not your spouse then, just a ff?
If you can throw some one over so easily you are not in love, and never have been.

He is not your spouse then, just a ff?
If you can throw some one over so easily you are not in love, and never have been.

What an outrageously judgemental attitude - how the hell can you dare to be so presumptious about someone else's relationship?

What an outrageously judgemental attitude - how the hell can you dare to be so presumptious about someone else's relationship?

Because of the wisdom of decades, I know you better than you know yourselves. ;)

Yes. Because my friend is of the opposite sex.

Yes. Because my friend is of the opposite sex.

So why does that make your other half jealous? Are they insecure and worried you'll have anaffair with your friend?

He is not your spouse then, just a ff?
If you can throw some one over so easily you are not in love, and never have been.

If you ask your partner to choose between you and their friends, people who have been there to support him/ her years before he/ she even met you, then you don't know how to love someone.

Maybe you've never had friends as good as mine?

If you ask your partner to choose between you and their friends, people who have been there to support him/ her years before he/ she even met you, then you don't know how to love someone.

Maybe you've never had friends as good as mine?

A partner IMO is someone you enter into an arrangement with.

My wife is my wife.
'partner' is a horrible word to use in the context of someone you love and have decided to spend the rest of your life with.
It is only used as a PC term to lump all people together, in order to make other, more dubious, relationships seem to have some degree of respectability to them.

When you are young, friends seem very important.
As you grow older and become your own man, with your individual ideas and thoughts, they are less important than they used to be, still there, but not as vital as used to be. :thumbsup:

A partner IMO is someone you enter into an arrangement with.

My wife is my wife.
'partner' is a horrible word to use in the context of someone you love and have decided to spend the rest of your life with.
It is only used as a PC term to lump all people together, in order to make other, more dubious, relationships seem to have some degree of respectability to them.

What is marriage if not an arrangement? Sanctioned by the church and the state, but an arrangement nevertheless.
Why do you feel long term relationships other than marriage are 'dubious'?

If you are Genuinely IN LOVE with a person, and not just LOVE them, then there should be trust as well. I insist that my partner goes out with her friends, and to her works parties, as she has encouraged that I do the same as well. Time away from your loved one now and again is a good thing, and gives you something different to talk about. Without TRUST There can be NO LOVE :)

If you are Genuinely IN LOVE with a person, and not just LOVE them, then there should be trust as well. I insist that my partner goes out with her friends, and to her works parties, as she has encouraged that I do the same as well. Time away from your loved one now and again is a good thing, and gives you something different to talk about. Without TRUST There can be NO LOVE :)

Quite correct, you are wise beyond your years.

Mind you in the first flush of being in love you have eyes for no one else.
True love and trust is built on that foundation, but watch out, for once that has gone, it is gone forever, and can never be found again.

If you are Genuinely IN LOVE with a person, and not just LOVE them, then there should be trust as well. I insist that my partner goes out with her friends, and to her works parties, as she has encouraged that I do the same as well. Time away from your loved one now and again is a good thing, and gives you something different to talk about. Without TRUST There can be NO LOVE :)

Not off topic, but streaching it very slightly....did anyone see hidden lived on five last night? It was a bit of an eye opener about relationships and the way some develope...

Quite correct, you are wise beyond your years.

Mind you in the first flush of being in love you have eyes for no one else.
True love and trust is built on that foundation, but watch out, for once that has gone, it is gone forever, and can never be found again.

This of course is very true, but even in the early stages, there should be trust, if not, then the relationship is doomed to fail.

Mine loves my mates and we often go out in odd threesomes or whatever (they're all single or having relationship issues at present). As his are mainly down south I don't have much to do with his mates but they're ok with me when I see them.

This of course is very true, but even in the early stages, there should be trust, if not, then the relationship is doomed to fail.

Yes absolutely, when I was young I could be trusted implicitely with any woman you would care to mention. :cool:
After all young men only want young women as friends dont we? :thumbsup:
I think the majority of you young fellows are trying to convince yourselves more than anyone else.
Or they are putting something in the water in Sheffield.

I have been round the block too many times to fall for the 'Just good friends' malarky :hihi:

Not off topic, but streaching it very slightly....did anyone see hidden lived on five last night? It was a bit of an eye opener about relationships and the way some develope...


enlighten us then

Yes absolutely, when I was young I could be trusted implicitely with any woman you would care to mention. :cool:
After all young men only want young women as friends dont we? :thumbsup:
I think the majority of you young fellows are trying to convince yourselves more than anyone else.
Or they are putting something in the water in Sheffield.

I have been round the block too many times to fall for the 'Just good friends' malarky :hihi:

:hihi: :hihi: :hihi: I was implying couples settling into a long term serious relationship, getting engaged, married. I too have been round the block and back several times too. :hihi: :hihi: :hihi: AAAHHHH The good old days.

:hihi: :hihi: :hihi: I was implying couples settling into a long term serious relationship, getting engaged, married. I too have been round the block and back several times too. :hihi: :hihi: :hihi: AAAHHHH The good old days.

The trouble is these days, I am trusted implicitly, with women of any age. :hihi:
I am old enough to be the father of most of them. :(

Come to think of it, hmm... :hihi:

The trouble is these days, I am trusted implicitly, with women of any age. :hihi:
I am old enough to be the father of most of them. :(

Come to think of it, hmm... :hihi:


:nono: Now Now:nono: :hihi: :hihi: , Be good.:hihi:

A partner IMO is someone you enter into an arrangement with.

My wife is my wife.
'partner' is a horrible word to use in the context of someone you love and have decided to spend the rest of your life with.


Well, partner is the word I am choosing because I am not just talking to you specifically, what I was saying applies to everyone: some people have boyfriends, girlfriends, fiances, spouses...it's not a PC term it's a generic term for long term relationships.

I do agree that trust is essential in a relationship Pooch 1, and yes Halibut you're right just because a coupe are not married doesn't make their relationship any less valid that a married couple's.

Well, partner is the word I am choosing because I am not just talking to you specifically, what I was saying applies to everyone: some people have boyfriends, girlfriends, fiances, spouses...it's not a PC term it's a generic term for long term relationships.

I do agree that trust is essential in a relationship Pooch 1, and yes Halibut you're right just because a coupe are not married doesn't make their relationship any less valid that a married couple's.

You can choose whatever you want.
My Wife is my Wife.

You call your mate whatever you want my friend. :thumbsup:

A partner IMO is someone you enter into an arrangement with.

My wife is my wife.
'partner' is a horrible word to use in the context of someone you love and have decided to spend the rest of your life with.
It is only used as a PC term to lump all people together, in order to make other, more dubious, relationships seem to have some degree of respectability to them.

When you are young, friends seem very important.
As you grow older and become your own man, with your individual ideas and thoughts, they are less important than they used to be, still there, but not as vital as used to be. :thumbsup:


You really are a complete Richard Edward, aren't you?

Dozy

You really are a complete Richard Edward, aren't you?

Dozy

Yes, how did realise that so easy, son?
Baw Gawd You Come from The Ole Back Easy Junction, boy. :hihi: :loopy:

If you are Genuinely IN LOVE with a person, and not just LOVE them, then there should be trust as well. I insist that my partner goes out with her friends, and to her works parties, as she has encouraged that I do the same as well. Time away from your loved one now and again is a good thing, and gives you something different to talk about. Without TRUST There can be NO LOVE :)

Wonderfully said and I agree, its total trust to allow your partner space to do their own thing and you also within the trust of your relationship, why should I prevent my wife from socialising with her friends, or she mine?
I know her friends and she knows mine and we sometimes meet at functions or whatever.

Well, it depends. Sometimes he is. Especialy about my 'walking' friends. I love walking with our dog and as it is Alaskan Malamute I have to for long walks. I have a bunch of friends that go with me. And unfortuately most of them are men. My husband doesn't like walking with our dog so I have some other people amd dogs to accompany us. And my husband doesn't understand how a woman can be friends with a man. He thinks that men usually want some sexual reletionship with most women they meet on their way. Weird. Unfortunately a lot of my male friends think similarily. Maybe that's this Polish way of thinking.

Well, it depends. Sometimes he is. Especialy about my 'walking' friends. I love walking with our dog and as it is Alaskan Malamute I have to for long walks. I have a bunch of friends that go with me. And unfortuately most of them are men. My husband doesn't like walking with our dog so I have some other people amd dogs to accompany us. And my husband doesn't understand how a woman can be friends with a man. He thinks that men usually want some sexual reletionship with most women they meet on their way. Weird. Unfortunately a lot of my male friends think similarily. Maybe that's this Polish way of thinking.

what is "this polish way of thinking"? are you both Polish?

My bf used to be jealous of my friends when we started to go out but has realised since that he has nothing to be jealous of. He had real problems as I am bi sexual and so he was worried about the men and women in my life. I'm also a very tactile person and I'm always touching people (not inapropriately) so he had to get used to that aswell.
One of his friends asked me if I was the jealous type and I told him I thought jealousy was just showing a lack of trust and was an insult to the person it was directed towards.

One of his friends asked me if I was the jealous type and I told him I thought jealousy was just showing a lack of trust and was an insult to the person it was directed towards.

Although I am uncomfortable with jealousy and find it unacceptable that some people ask their partner to choose between them and their friends, I think it's a bit harsh to call their behaviour insulting.

Of course in some extreme cases it is a complete lack of trust like you said, but in many cases jealous people are just insecure.

I've noticed in can be down to age sometimes: 10 years ago I felt insecure about girls who were prettier than me and would wonder if my boyfriend was looking at them, etc.It sounds stupid now but I wanted to be the prettiest girl in his eyes!

Now that I'm older I've accepted that I'm not the prettiest and never have been, but that's fine!
I even look at attractive women and point them out to him, not feeling jealous at all!

what is "this polish way of thinking"? are you both Polish?

Yes, we are. The problem is that he thinks I am both physically and intelectually attractive. So men find me attractive and they may be tempted to have an affair with me (whatever it means).
Well, I would risk to say that most Polish men are jelous about "their women". It may come from traditions and western countries are more liberated when it comes to relationship (correct me if I am wrong). When I was in England I noticed that when some men got interested in a women they didn't mind much if she was in a relationship or not. But maybe (with my luck) I met only those "bad" ones;)
Frankly speaking, I don't think he is jelous about sexual matters but he is afraid of loosing his position (in the herd lol). I spend a few hours a day with other people ( apart from work), and spend this time walkinh, talking and having fun. Maybe this is the thing he is afraid of. :confused:

Isn't he attractive enough to counterbalance his feelings of jealousy or do you imagine he has these feelings, has he expressed them verbally?

I can't believe the way that women judge men basic on their own ethics/principles.
It's not a polish thing, it's a biological thing.