kirky
24-09-2004, 15:49
> An Appeal for your Help
>
> A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter scale hit in the early
> hours of Tuesday morning, epicentre - Barnsley, England.
>
> News of the disaster was swiftly carried abroad by the towns 3500
> racing pigeons, as victims were seen wandering around aimlessly
> muttering 'fookinell' and 'choofinnorah'.
>
> The earthquake decimated the town causing £30 worth of damage.
> Several priceless collections of mementoes from the Balearic Isles and
> the Spanish Costas were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of
> historical burnt out cars were disturbed.
>
> Many locals were woken well before their Giro arrived. Radio Barnsley
> reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered,
> still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting
> had happened in Barnsley. One resident, 15 year old mother of 3 Tracy
> Sharon Braithwaite said, 'it was such a shock, my little
> Chardonnay-Madonna came running into my bedroom crying. The twins
> Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still
> shaking when I was watching Kilroy the next morning'. Locals were
> determined not to be bowed as looting, muggings and car crime carried on
> as normal.
>
> So far whilst the Brithsh Red Cross has managed to ship 4000 crates of
> Sunny Delight to the area to relieve the suffering ot stricken locals,
> rescue workers searching through the rubble found large quantities of
> personal belongings including benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth
> Duke at Argos and bone china from Poundstrecher.
>
> Can You Help?
>
> Please respond generously to our appeal for food and clothing for the
> victims of this disaster.
>
> Clothing is needed most of all especially
> Fila or Burberry baseball caps
> Kappa tracksuit tops (his or hers)
> Shell suits (female)
> White sports socks
> Rockfort boots or any other product sold in Primark.
>
> Microwave meals, tinned baked beans, ice cream and cans of Colt 45 or
> Special Brew are ideal. Please do not give anything that requires
> peeling.
>
> Remember
> 22p buys a biro for filling in compensation claims
> £2 buys chips, crisps and a blue fizzy drink for a family of 9
> £5 will pay for a packet of B and H and a lighter to calm a child's
> nerves.
>
> Urgently reguired: Tinned Whippet food. Bones for Jack Russells.
>
> Please do not send tents for shelter. The sight of such posh housing
> will cause discontent in the surrounding South Yorkshire communities.
>
> A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter scale hit in the early
> hours of Tuesday morning, epicentre - Barnsley, England.
>
> News of the disaster was swiftly carried abroad by the towns 3500
> racing pigeons, as victims were seen wandering around aimlessly
> muttering 'fookinell' and 'choofinnorah'.
>
> The earthquake decimated the town causing £30 worth of damage.
> Several priceless collections of mementoes from the Balearic Isles and
> the Spanish Costas were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of
> historical burnt out cars were disturbed.
>
> Many locals were woken well before their Giro arrived. Radio Barnsley
> reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered,
> still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting
> had happened in Barnsley. One resident, 15 year old mother of 3 Tracy
> Sharon Braithwaite said, 'it was such a shock, my little
> Chardonnay-Madonna came running into my bedroom crying. The twins
> Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still
> shaking when I was watching Kilroy the next morning'. Locals were
> determined not to be bowed as looting, muggings and car crime carried on
> as normal.
>
> So far whilst the Brithsh Red Cross has managed to ship 4000 crates of
> Sunny Delight to the area to relieve the suffering ot stricken locals,
> rescue workers searching through the rubble found large quantities of
> personal belongings including benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth
> Duke at Argos and bone china from Poundstrecher.
>
> Can You Help?
>
> Please respond generously to our appeal for food and clothing for the
> victims of this disaster.
>
> Clothing is needed most of all especially
> Fila or Burberry baseball caps
> Kappa tracksuit tops (his or hers)
> Shell suits (female)
> White sports socks
> Rockfort boots or any other product sold in Primark.
>
> Microwave meals, tinned baked beans, ice cream and cans of Colt 45 or
> Special Brew are ideal. Please do not give anything that requires
> peeling.
>
> Remember
> 22p buys a biro for filling in compensation claims
> £2 buys chips, crisps and a blue fizzy drink for a family of 9
> £5 will pay for a packet of B and H and a lighter to calm a child's
> nerves.
>
> Urgently reguired: Tinned Whippet food. Bones for Jack Russells.
>
> Please do not send tents for shelter. The sight of such posh housing
> will cause discontent in the surrounding South Yorkshire communities.