To me, Christmas is all about family and friends, and the trappings are just 'there'.

It wouldn't matter if the hamper company had gone bust, the dog had eaten the turkey, or any number of other 'disasters' that people could tell you tales of, so long as I get to spend Christmas with family and friends :)

This year I was left feeling as though I'd like to batten down the hatches, and spend Christmas alone snuggled in front of the fire with Mr Strix and our Beagle - and forget all the family politicking :(

The upshot is, we won't be seeing my family until after the dust settles on Christmas this year :suspect:

The reason? I'm not spending Christmas watching my dad texting his floozy and hiding in the garage to make phonecalls when the rest of us are decorating trees, cooking food, doing jobs he'd promised to do weeks ago :rant:

Sorry mum, I just can't do it :(


When did you last decide enough is enough? ;)

PS - my sister has made the same decision :(

In my opinion Strix, the best part of chrismas is the get together, all the family at the pub having a laugh and a joke. None of the comercial mumbo jumbo, and rediculous presents that end up in a cupboard somewhere after boxing day.
The main thing that does my head in at christmas, is all the decorations, I cant bring myself to like them, IMO there a waste of money, if you havent got kids.

Im sorry to hear about your situation though, and I hope you patch things up.

Merry Christmas :)

Christmas is the only time of year when I have enough spare time to text my flloozy, who I normally keep in my garage.

Remember - a turkey is for life, not just for christmas.

I think in your situation I'd decide the same thing Strix- I'm lucky to have a family who all get on and who actually want to spend time together.

There are lots of people who don't have family (or at least family they get on with) with whom to spend Christmas- and just because they aren't comforming to the hyped 'must have' idyllic family get together that simply does not exist for most people.

To not have that sort of Christmas is not a failure- everyone's allowed to spend the day how they choose.

To not have that sort of Christmas is not a failure- everyone's allowed to spend the day how they choose.:suspect: :mad: If everybody is going to be that selfish and inconsiderate, nobody gets to spend Christmas as they choose :mad: :suspect:

My mum is very unhappy she won't be spending Christmas with her family round her, and that is as a direct result of my dad's behaviour. The really stupid thing is, that my dad is also disappointed that I will not be there, and although he's still upset at my sister losing her rag with him in the summer, I think he is disappointed she isn't coming, as he wanted to tell her she couldn't :mad:

Where in all that mess can you see anybody who is 'spending the day as they choose'? :confused:

Why not invite your Mum over for christmas on her own? Thats what I would be tempted to do anyway.

I would - if she wasn't in Cambridge and without transport :(

I would - if she wasn't in Cambridge and without transport :(


Right, that idea is out of the window then. I think I would feel exactly the same as you, and I would be scared to death of causing a scene if it was my Dad.

unfortunately i'm far too confrontational for my own good - i'd go along and in all liklihood ruin christmas for many people by telling m'dad what i thought of him (if it was my family). sometimes it works out for the best, and i really don't believe in 'honesty is the best policy' but sometimes i just can't keep my mouth shut. i think you've made the right decision not to go, and just because you won't actually be seeing your rellies doesn't mean you can't have a darned good christmas. why not spend the day making the king-saga up to brude by going for a lovely walk somewhere different to normal? and then have a lovely long bath with a glass of bucks fizz? and stuff teh turkey (not literally) - have something different (waste of an animal's life if it's just the two/three of you anyway...all that wasted meat) for christmas dinner?

At Teafan Towers, we have a strict rotation policy: family one year, please ourselves the next. This year is a please ourselves year :)

As of now, I am going to get down to doing some serious bugger-all for the next two days, after which I shall rest, and get slowly wasted.

So Merry Xmas, and I await Kofi Annan's text on New Year's day to tell me what 2007 will be the International Year of.

Remember - a turkey is for life, not just for christmas.

Korean version.

Remember a dog's not just for christmas. It's ok with chips on boxing day. :hihi:

I'm not doing christmas except the collecting pressies part.

Where in all that mess can you see anybody who is 'spending the day as they choose'? :confused:

I didn't mean that you can all do exactly what you want to do- what I meant was that in this situation you do still have a choice, and you're exercising that choice by not attending.

So Merry Xmas, and I await Kofi Annan's text on New Year's day to tell me what 2007 will be the International Year of.


Please keep up (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ban_Ki-moon)!! :hihi:

Korean version.

Please keep up (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ban_Ki-moon)!! :hihi:

Doh! I must tell my mate to change our other mate's entry in his phone from "Kofi Annan" to "Ban Ki-moon"!

2006, by the way, was the International Year of Pink Chocolate.

I think it's a fight with your conscience really, isn't it ? This year would be the first year that I don't celebrate it with my immediate family. I felt very sad in knowing this. It used to be great when everyone makes a big effort and things, and everyone chips in. You will just forget all the ills and things. Maybe it was easier as children, cos we're ignorant, and the adults usually sort themselves out. Now that everyone is an adult, it's pretty hard... Maybe it will be different in the future ? Our family is too big for everyone not to get on with 'someone'. This year I'm avoiding bro, and let SIL celebrate it with her family instead. So I'm escaping to my auntie's, where I feel more wanted. :cry:

I find that, the older I get, the sadder Christmas gets... bah, humbug !

last yr was 1st yr we didn't pop round to my parents, glad as mum get's stressed trying to cook n entertain. then we usualy end up arguing. last yr thay called on us on way to pick up there guests, to see kids. then it was just us to do as we pleased till evening when we visited hubbys family. less stressfull. though i am lucky that family live close by. must be hard for you in your situation but try and enjoy it:thumbsup: . would your mum not have come and stayed for a few days or would that have made it awkward with your dad?

We were 2 nanoseconds late for Christmas dinner last year - it's not as if dad was making turkey soufflé FFS - so this year we are DISinvited on Christmas day. He grumped at me the whole time last year so he is in fact doing me a favour, as we can have our very first Christmas without having to race to somebody's house and we can drink without having to worry how much, won't have to watch what we say, and I can text my floozy without anyone asking questions.

Did I just say that out loud? :help:

I've recently been 'enlightened' and informed that members of my family, whom I thought got along, - don't get along. If closer members of my clan had felt able to be frank, then I might not have put myself through the stress of the past 3 or 4 Christmas's. Next year I plan to go away (or at least pretend that I'm going away).!

I would - if she wasn't in Cambridge and without transport :(
Trains/coaches not an option? :)

I didn't mean that you can all do exactly what you want to do- what I meant was that in this situation you do still have a choice, and you're exercising that choice by not attending.Sorry Meds :sad: I wasn't having a go at you - that comment was just a bit too close to my dad's stupid theory that 'what I do is my business' :suspect:

He has no idea how wrong he is :roll:

There is more to this story - so suffice to say, we've decided what we are doing, and my mum has made her own decision too ;)

We get to chill out with Mr Strix's family, walks on the beach with our boogle, visit the rest of the extended clan - all without the usual expedition from Cambridge to Liverpool :)