This is the start of a set of stories aimed at children.
Brookley Parva - a Children's story. (http://sheffieldwriters.ath.cx/SFStoryArchive/1160046585.rtf)
This thread and its contents were posted some time ago, in a less easily read format. I have deleted a couple of posts which brought the difficult format to the notice of Hopman, who was kind enough to re-format it on the Server. In the meantime it slipped "way down" the pages.
Unfortunately because of the difficulty in reading it's original presentation, it has never been reviewed on the Writing Group.
I have read it......and for young children it is a wonderfully written piece of work and is exactly the sort of thing very young children love to have read to them, and read themselves when a little older.
Hopman, my apologies for not bringing this to the fore earlier. It's terrific, and well worthy of being a basis for future stories around this setting and the village. :thumbsup:
I invite all "Writing" Members to read and comment on this piece, albeit somewhat delayed.
The next instalment of this story aimed at Children can be found at:
More from Brookley Parva. (http://sheffieldwriters.ath.cx/SFStoryArchive/1163500066.doc)
A lovely Part 2 to expand on the Part 1 tale.
The writing style, with its straightforward "Nursery" Storybook technique blends in perfectly with Part 1, Hopman. :)
You know Hopman, I can actually see a child reading this from a book.Their little finger underneath each word, like my son used to read,as a child.What a wonderful childrens printed book it would make, with beautiful coloured pictures of Joe, and his wife. Well done. :thumbsup:
I had not read Part one yet, but have now.Wouldnt these stories make lovely childrens books.So readable by the young.
Very good Hopman.
As Pattricia says, you can visualize the children being read this story, their little eyes as wide as saucers, awe-struck , perfect for nursery schools.
I think the only negative comment I must make is…..Quote, “It’s all free coal, Alison.” said Joe. “Very clever, Joe.” Said his wife. Unquote.
I know it may seem petty in our eyes, but all you need is one pedantic teacher to say it can be deemed as petty theft and so get your writings refused.
(I just heard someone say, he’s some need to talk coming for where he comes from)
Keep up the good work Hopman and I suspect we may see your books next to the likes of Candlewick Green and Wind in the willows
Thank you for your kind words. Episode Three will follow in due course. In all it runs to eight episodes. (I've not thought of a Christmas special yet.
Really enjoyed part one and two Hopman and looking forward to the third. I can imagine the pictures to go with the story and like Pattrica said a little person reading it while following his finger. It would make a great bedtime story for the little ones.:thumbsup:
Brookley Parva part 3 (http://sheffieldwriters.ath.cx/SFStoryArchive/1164209753.doc)
Some years ago i did a creative writer's course .The group was told if your writing for young children keep it simple as though your drawing a picture for a child you did an excellent job of it .
Yippee...got in this time and let me read it.
Brilliant, really can imagine it as a kiddies story book with bright colourful pictures!:banana: :banana: