im the nicest girl you will ever meet and will never cheat on anyone....
but lately i have the biggest problem ever...me and my boyfriend havent been seeing eye to eye lately been arguing close to splitting its knocked me for 7...and last week i bumped into his best mate and another of his friend on the town we all ended up stayin out drinking together and i got on with the other mate really well n we really clicked we r both in the same boat with our partners and seem to chat well about this problem we both have we laughed all night had fun was just a really enjoyable evening...we exchanged numbers as mates as i always see him about n we've been textin and chatting on the phone and over the last few days my head has gone in the clouds...i have this butterfly in my stomach i havent had for a long time...i feel happy wen i think of this friend and he feels the same, he said ive got to him and he cant get me out of his head but we feel so bad as we both hav gf/bf and dont want to cheat but cant help the way we r thinking of one another...i know this is wrong and i feel sick to the brim...whats the right thing to do??? whats the right way to feel? am i feel like this as my bf doesnt give me the attention n feeling his friend does...he says his gf doesnt show much affection as wat i do towards him either....please help me what am i to do? :(

Why cheat? Be honest with yourself and your boyfriend. Maybe you wern't meant for each other, so just end it with your boyfriend and see what happens with the new guy.

knowing from previous experience ive done that n the other bloke doesnt want to know.....mmmm think u need to think bout this one chick

without wishing to sound patronising, are you all young. If you're all in your teens then it's part of growing up :D Firstly, get shut of your bf and let things cool for a while.

However, the best friend who his hitting on you could be seen as a bit of a git/traitor in the eyes of your bf. (and maybe rightly so)

Edit.. Guess you're 26 seeing your user name. Same advice still applies.

See how you feel in a month or two so you are sure it is not just an emotional reaction to a slump.

Oh sweetie,You are in a sticky situation by what you are saying.If you dont have feelings for your boyfriend anymore and you really dont want to be with him then get shut,life is too short to be unhappy,and pass the advice on to your male friend too!!!!!
I really hope all goes well for you hun.
Good Luck.:thumbsup:

Unless I've misunderstood the dilemma, if it's one of your boyfriends mates it'll never work. It might seem like a bed of roses now but dependent on how long they've been mates, there friendship will ultimately be the winner.

It's just thw way it goes.

obviously i don't know anything other than what you've just posted about yourself, but the one thing i always say to people having trouble like this is to remember that no-one can look after you as well as you can - you have to think of yourself first, even if that sounds selfish. you only have one life. And, there's no such thing as making the wrong decision in a situation like this - take your time making your mind up, but whatever you decide, you've chosen the right thing to do at the time (even if you look back on it and it was wrong in retrospect), so don't regret whatever you decide. don't over-analyse things, just go with your intuition.

anyway, personally i think the chasing and the flirting are the fun part - after that bit is over you're left with what a relationship really can be. can you imagine having a relationship with your bf's mate? also, you wouldn't be seriously considering it as an option if your own relationship was entirely OK.

my ten penneth.

as my friend says in with a penny out with a tenner lol

no my bf has been a prat latley hes away in spain at the moment never even asked me to go...boo...
well they aint close friends let put it that way my bf b4 i met him cheated on his friend with a girl he was seeing so i dont think there the closest of friends even though they put up with eah other....its a head cracker we r both puzzled as we only wanna do wats right

Unless I've misunderstood the dilemma, if it's one of your boyfriends mates it'll never work. It might seem like a bed of roses now but dependent on how long they've been mates, there friendship will ultimately be the winner.

It's just thw way it goes.

I dont agree with you !!!! sorry.
I was with my boyfriend 5 years when i met one of his friends,We hit it off straight away and we are still together now after 14 years.:thumbsup:

whats right is if you're unhappy with your bf then finish with him. then don't see or contact the other guy for a month, if you still feel the same way after a month and so does he then you can progress from there

I dont agree with you !!!! sorry.
I was with my boyfriend 5 years when i met one of his friends,We hit it off straight away and we are still together now after 14 years.:thumbsup:

Well obviously there are exceptions.

Tell me, did your boyfriend and ex remain best mates straight away or did they fall out over it?

If it was that simple a switch, you must have a very understanding and liberal circle of friends.

It would drive me mad seeing my ex of 5 years with one of my best mates.

I think only you can decide what is right for you..just have a good hard think about what is going on etc..

When I was a bit younger (21ish) I was with this man an I thought he was awful and I needed more attention and more fun so I went and got it..after I went and got it and did what I did..I regreted it!! :confused: I'm not with him now but I did regret what I did at the time...

Really you have to think hard yourself!!

Do you love this person you are with now?

Well obviously there are exceptions.

Tell me, did your boyfriend and ex remain best mates straight away or did they fall out over it?

If it was that simple a switch, you must have a very understanding and liberal circle of friends.

It would drive me mad seeing my ex of 5 years with one of my best mates.

No my ex and my hubby dont speak at all now.
My ex blames my hubby for us splitting up but the split was inevitable before i met my hubby anyway for various reasons.
I dont even speak to my ex either and neither does his daughter.

No my ex and my hubby dont speak at all now.
My ex blames my hubby for us splitting up but the split was inevitable before i met my hubby anyway for various reasons.
I dont even speak to my ex either and neither does his daughter.

Kinda proves my point does it not? OK, I said that mates normally prevail but one way or the other, someone gets hurt and puts blame in one direction. And excuse me for sticking my nose in but, what happens when your daughter does want to speak to her dad (and I realise by timescales she is older enough to already have thought about it, and that she is not a young child)

i think im just gonna break with the boyfriend has we talked last night and hes unsure of what he wants with me as well, and i think im gonna not be in touch with the friend either think its best all round

I dont agree with you !!!! sorry.
I was with my boyfriend 5 years when i met one of his friends,We hit it off straight away and we are still together now after 14 years.:thumbsup:

I agree too. Was my my ex for 4 years when I discoverd I was mad about his best mate and his best mate felt the same about me. We shared the same interests and really enjoyed each others company.I stayed with my ex for six month of feeling strongly about his mate as I did not want anyone to get hurt but at the same time me and his mate were hurting as we could not be together. It was hard to leave as he was really upset but Im happily married to his mate now and have a a great feeling inside me all the time.:blush:
He has moved on also.

only time will tell i guess just guess ive got to be a brave soilder lol

Just dump him. If he's not making you happy then don't stay with him!

only time will tell i guess just guess ive got to be a brave soilder lol
oh hun i know what you mean and it is hard talk it threw with your boyfriend yes the attention is brill. but just remember the grass is not always greener on the other side. good luck hun:) :)

oh hun i know what you mean and it is hard talk it threw with your boyfriend yes the attention is brill. but just remember the grass is not always greener on the other side. good luck hun:) :)

Unless they use evergreen:hihi:

I was in the same situation as you chick when i was 16. In the end i realised that if i really had feelings for someone else whether it was his mate or not that it just wasnt meant to be with my ex. It was actually his mate that made all the moves and kinda "stole" me. Im now 20 nd we have been together for 4 years and got married in Feb. Of course it doesnt all end like this but what have you got to loose? All i would say is will your mates bloke risk loosing his mate? My ex and husband no longer see eye to eye. As you can imagine!!!!

hope it all works out for the best

H xxxxx

update of this situation folks.....i decided to tell his friend i wasnt intrested in that way and i only wanted to be mates cause i had a bf who was his mate and he had a gf, and he went all funny on me n quiet nasty stopped talkin to me blew everyone off, and my bf came bk from hols and hes been so nice and i couldnt ask for a better boyfriend........and i hope to keep him that way lol xx

be honest,ask your bloke if he thinks there is any point in continuing the relationship,if he says no then your away with the new guy,if he says yes ask for some comitment toprove its still worth while,then again,ask yourself if its still worth while