My toddler is 2. She still has a dummy. I think she has it quite a lot by my family don't think she does. I now only give it to her when she asks (i.e when tired/sleeping or wanting two minutes quiet time)

She isn't talking but says lots of one off words (about 20 different words)...can communicate very effectively in other ways...

My health visitor says that the dummy is preventing her from developing her speech...Any experience of this? Any suggestions?

Its true! My daughters speech improved dramatically within days of taking her dummy away form her!

Its true! My daughters speech improved dramatically within days of taking her dummy away form her!

Yep i agree with Jabber! My niece is 2 and she would hardly say anything, just the usual Mum & Dad etc but when we took the dummy off her she completely changed and now we cant shut her up :hihi: xx

all 3 of my children have had a dummy from birth to there 2nd birthday (dummy fairy) and there is no problem with there speech. number three is just in the process of getting rid on his now but hes even better at talking than the other two were when they were his age. If you talk to your child clearly he will copy you. if you read then that is also good for developing sreech. but a 2+ year old shoudnt need a dummy really. get rid after their 2nd birthday.

I'm glad this has being brought up, after having numerous discussions on other parent forums i go on where there were mixed reviews.
I personally see nothing wrong with a child of 2 having a dummy when they want some 'me' time as to them its comfort, my sister had her dummy for sleeping way after starting school and her speech is fine, always has been as are her teeth.
My mum always says that children develop at their own rate, for example my brother could talk really well by the time he was 1 but he didn't walk until he was 19 months old where as i could walk by the time i was 1 but didn't really talk until i was 2 (and i didn't have a dummy at all.)
People today are too quick to judge others when they hear about a child who can't do this and that by whatever age, my son is almost 18 months old, can walk, run etc but he doesn't really want to talk which is fine by me, i'm not going to push him into being a 'brainy' child, he will talk when he wants to, he communicates with me in different ways. He only has his dummy when he sleeps or when he's feeling poorly and needs some comfort to have a nap.
Health visitors discouraged dummies from birth which explains why yours has said its affecting her speech, people are simply for dummies or not!
Liose - take her dummy away from her when you feel ready to, perhaps do the dummy fairy at Christmas time, get her to leave her dummy for Santa in a special place and perhaps leave her an extra gift in its place.
I don't agree in taking their dummies off them if they still need it and scream for it.
Sorry this is a long reply, just my views.

Well my daughter had a lot of problems with her speech right up to the age of three, her Ss were terrible, so we had her hearing checked on advice from the doc and she was ok, but her speech degenerated so badly that the specialist said it sounded as if she had a cleft lip or palate, and suggested we threw away the dummy.

In days there were improvements.

Ok - so even though she doesn't have it a lot, I am aware of the fact that she is 2 and start to question if she should have it...the problem is we are moving house and have a new baby coming and I feel at the moment the last thing I need to do is take away her comforter as she will need all the familiarity she can get. I too was of the opinion she will talk when she wants but as time goes on and I look and listen to other 2 year olds (which I KNOW you shouldn't) - I just wonder why she isn't talking...I talk to her all the time, we read a lot, I think she is highly active and stimulated with lots of role play...It's just difficult...But the cold turkey and taking it off her I do feel would be too much.

We said to our little girl that she would be grown up if she didnt have a dummy.
She put it into the bin herself.

We said to our little girl that she would be grown up if she didnt have a dummy.
She put it into the bin herself.

Aww bless her xx

Aww bless her xx
Bless her? Shes a damn psycho!

Just like her daddy:D

I'm glad someone brought this up, my girls have dummies and my intention is to have a visit from the dummy fairy to get rid of them sometime in the next year.

I agree its true but would not like to be in your shoes if you try to take it away at 2 we gave my sons to afther christmas when he wa 3 1/2 i wouldn't have dreamed getting rid any earlier than that

Perhaps it's worth limiting your child's time with a dummy first, rather than removing it all in one go.

Cosycub has a dummy, but we have only ever used it for bedtimes, nap times, and in direst teething moments when he's threatening to chew off some important part of me/his daddy/the dog. That gives him all the time he needs to practise his language skills - which he does loudly and constantly - but doesn't remove a source of comfort from his life should he need it, especially as he's not so clever at keeping hold of a teething ring (so many other important things to get your little paws on at that age, lol).

Obviously at some point it will have to go, and I'm hoping it won't be a trauma...but because it's never been used as a constant companion for him, I'm hoping it won't be too hard.

I do dislike seeing children with a dummy stuck in their mouth constantly, and as much as I hate to join the finger-wagging brigade, I think there's a lot to be said for limiting their use...but as with all things, moderation and common sense should rule, as should dealing with children as individuals, with individual needs and coming to things in their own time.

There is nothing wrong with a dummy, and at times I they were a blessing. But as long as they are for sleeping and nap times thats fine. Plenty of children without dummies have speech problems too. There is no reason for a toddler to walk around with one in its mouth all day though.

I was worried about my son (20 months), health visitor told me off for letting him use the dummy! Babies should only use them untill the age of 1.

So i stopped letting him have the dummy all the time and he's talking!! Seriously it works, he still has it at night or during the day for a nap or if he's upset but thats it.

He now says dady, mumy, great, juice, happy this is under a week!! I wish i'd taken it out before :hihi:

Its good to hear that most of you feel dummy`s don`t have a long term effect on baby`s speech. Before having our 3 month old we were determined he wouldn`t have one, however now he is here its a different story. Its great to have something to give him to soothe away his horrid little gripey fits. After reading up too, apparently its better for them to have a dummy than to suck their thumbs (which he did, although he attempted to insert his entire little fist into his mouth) as of course a dummy can be taken away when its time to ween them off it.

Personally, I hate to hear a child trying to speak round a dummy - I dont think it will hinder their learning to speak, it is just so much easier when they haven't got a gob full of dummy!
However - as was mentioned above - all children are different!

I have a 6 month old daughter who has been a dummy-sucker since the age of 5 or 6 weeks. I think dummies certainly have their place but I now feel that I have a window of opportunity to remove this habit as she has just started weaning, attending Nursery and very shortly will be in her own room overnight.

I am quite strongly of the belief that if you don't remove dummies at around 6 months or sooner then you've really got to wait until the child is 2 or 3 years old and can be persuaded/coerced into giving it up. I don't think either is a right or wrong time, I just feel it will be 'more-right' for my daughter and our family to do it now. I also feel that a 6 month habit will be easier to break than a 2 year habit.

I have done plenty of research and as I suspected the best advice seems to be the 'cold turkey' approach. I am fine with this and am rolling my sleeves up in anticipation of probably a couple of weeks of much crying and sleepless nights until baby adjusts but I'd really, REALLY appreciate any words of advice or true-life stories of their own dummy-eradication missions. Books are all good and well but it'd be far more useful to hear accounts of people who have actually been through this trauma - and come successfully out the other end!

I took my daughters dummy away around one year old on cold turkey. I kept them but hid them away and in times of need gave in! eventually threw them away around 18 months for good and never looked back- its not easy tho!

My little monster was two when we decided to ditch the dummy (No not me!) so we had a little word with the dentist who told her that it would make her teeth all crooked. She got home, took her dummy and binned it and hasnt needed it since. Not bad for a kid who had the thing on her almost constantly.

Yeah, I have read previous posts which have said 2 years is a good age and the tooth fairy is incentive enough but I just have this idea that I want baby off it now and feel it's the right thing for us.

So on the cold turkey front, how long do you think we're looking at before she forgets about her dummy and learns to pacify herself?

Also, have already thought I'd have to chuck all the dummies away - we tried a nearly-successful cold turkey attempt at around 4 months but her Daddy gave i while I was out one day. Can't blame him - I would have given in if he hadn't I am sure!

Have you considered a compromise? Just leave it in the cot. Let her have it at sleep time?

I personally dont think dummies are anything to worry about, but I know some people do. But I dont let my kids go round with them in their mouths all day. Funnily enough, none of them have wanted to: they all had too much to say!

my eldest is only 1 who had a dummy, we only gave it her at sleep time n when she was 2 we took it in night and left a noddy phone on pillow when she woke to ask for it we said she'd have to ring noddy but he would want his phone back, she never mentioned it again

we were incredibly lucky we just took his away when he was about 2 and we never had an issue with it.

A friend of mine made her child of around 18 months hang it on the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve - for Santa to give it to a new baby. I'm not sure how much he understood but he did it and they never looked back. Such a cute idea and one I hope to steal next Christmas if they still have them by then.
I've been working on less dummy time over recent weeks and they're doing fine so I think eventual abolishment should be easy enough eventually.
I realise you're hoping little Tee will be off it by then but worst case scenario you've always got next Christmas as back up.
My parents told me to put mine in the bin when I was about 18 months ish, which I did, and whenever I asked for it they told me I had put it in the bin and it had gone. So apparently I understood that a bit better.
Another friend of mine encouraged her little girl to suck her thumb - at least you haven't got that issue to contend with, since they can't remove her thumb (something to do with child protection or summat ;D) she has it all the time, I think they regret it now, after looking at me with such superiority about letting my girls have dummies!

Not very environmentally friendly but mine sent his to the baby fishes.. :rolleyes:
he flushed all 6 of them down the loo and waved each one goodbye. The youngest never had one. Refused it in the hospital and never bothered.

UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE!

Thanks so much for all your replies. It may be a bit 'previous' as it's only day two but I thought I'd let you know how we're getting on:

Over the weekend we dramatically decreased dummy usage, barring the mid-day nap on Saturday and a long car journey with Daddy on Sunday. By sheer chance she was so exhausted on Friday and Saturday nights that she fell asleep without the dummy anyhow.

Sunday evening was a bit of a struggle, however it only took an extra ten minutes to get her to sleep and I think partially that was down to teething/sore gums. No dummy at all yesterday and Monday was the first night she spent the whole night in her own room. No problems, woke slightly earlier than normal, at 6.10am but went back to sleep after a quick feed!

Today has gone absolutely swimmingly and though I'm sure it's my imagination she seems to have started babbling a lot more.

So, just to say, the advice of removing the dummy amidst a lot of other change is good (Baby Tee has started Nursery, cut a tooth and moved to her own room all over the past two weeks) as is totally getting rid of all dummies from the house! So far it has all been surprisingly easy so I am expecting a few setbacks still but now I have the confidence that she can manage without it... and I have the resolve to make her!!

Glad to hear its all going well. My little boy was a total dummy addict and couldn't sleep or go anywhere without it. We decided to get rid of it at about 5 months because he started to wake in the night and cry until we put it back in his mouth. We expected a really bad time but he totally suprised us and cried a bit at night for the first couple of nights, but only on and off for the first half an hour or so.
We noticed that he instantly seemed more relaxed during the day and started to sleep a lot better at night. His nursery commented that he seemed generally happier too. We haven't looked back. It has actually made out life easier.
Stick with it. It will be worth it in the long run. We threw all the dummies out so we couldn't give in, which was a good thing because my partner nearly gave in on the first night!!!

i know one little girl who has 3 at all times and shes 3-nightmare! hate the things but had to use as my baby was tube fed at birth and needed to learn the sucking motion. hes 16m now and has it for sleep time but spits it out after few minutes-so im not worried
was told be a midwife its safer for baby to be sucking on something during sleep as keeps airways open (cotdeath etc..)
i also know a boy of 5 who has a dummy when not at school-personally think thats ridiculous.
id rather my boy has a dummy over his thumb(gross gross) but generally hes taken to chewing on his bernie(toy bat) as hes teething!
all i would say about dummies, is keep them clean-some people let them go all brown and it makes me want to hurl!

My son has always loved his dummy, he had colic as a baby so was a real soother at times. since about 2 1/2 he has just had it a night time (or it was banisted to the bedroom/upstairs) we talked about it lots when he was 3 and he agreed when he was 4 he wouldn't have his dummy anymore as he would be 'a big boy' the night after his 4th birthday went fine he didn't have it and slept through. After that things have gradually gone down hill, to start he couldn't sleep and started coming down ( he never does this he is a 7pm - 7am sleeper) then also he started getting up in the night (which again he never does) 3am, 4am and 5am. He has been knackered, grumpy at nursery and short tempered and they have spoken to me about he decline in mood and him 'not listening' . I was so fed up and tired myself, I gave in and gave him it so get him off to sleep, 5 past 7 he was asleep, I then took it away, he got up in the night again, this went on, now I have totally given up he has his dummy, is happy and neather of us are tired anymore. This has been going on for the past 6 weeks I gave up last week and have my happy little boy back with dummy!!! What shall I do? Have I given in too early, is it such a big deal? I mean hes not going to want it when hes older??? I don't know what to do, any help advise?? anyone?

at 4 yrs old,at night i dont think its a problem,not in the daytime though,his teeth/mouth development etc,
id do as you are remove the dummy during the night or try taking it out an hour or so before he wakes,dont wear yourself out though its really not worth it.good luck x

My S-I-L & niece posted hers to the dummy fairy(aka Grandma). She then got a letter & Small gift back in the post. She was just over 4 at the time.

sounds just like my son,hes was 5 before i could get his off of him..:(
i took it off him at around 2 and a half but then i had my daughter so he just started to pinch hers so i gave in and gave him his dummy back.

but i would say not to push too hard and let him give in on his own it will make him feel like he has achieved something,thats what i did...oh and a few treats along the way...lol....:hihi:

My daughters dummy went to the Tooth Fairy just before her 3rd birthday. We told her that if she kept using it her teeth would get wonky but if she gave it to the tooth fairy then she would get a present from her! We made a big fuss and bought a little shiny box to put the dummy in and put it on the bedside table - it took her a little while to settle down but we kept reminding her that if she didn't sleep the tooth fairy wouldn't b able to come and dive her a present. Amazingly, after the present was delivered she very rarely asked for it, and when she did she was happy with the thought that the tooth fairy had it! We also threw the dummys away so we wouldn't be tempted to give in!

My son exchanged his for a go on a slide on holiday when he was about 2.He came off the slide looking for it on the floor where he threw it,I told him the binman had taken it(it was in my bag)He asked for it for the next 2 nights then never again.Up to us going away he only had it at night but the friends we were away with kept asking him where it was so he had it in all day until the slide.When we got home he found another 1 but never put it in his mouth he always asked for it when ill but would just hold it.

pull the teat off in front of her and say its broken, oh dear, your a big girl now, lets put it in the bin and you dont need it anymore etc etc.

were realy wanting to get our son of his dummy he's nearly 1 very forward for his age and now were thinking of taking his dummy of him is there anything we could replace it with with he's also got a full set of teeth to could the dummy damage them?

when my daughters teeth started to come through i decided no more dummy too.

personally i just got rid of it completely. didnt have a back up one as i know some parents do and didnt try and wean her off them either.

we had a few tantrums for a couple of days but so long as you're persistant and dont give in at all, they soon pass.

good luck!

lisa x

at 1 year old the dummy wont damage his teeth,i think its around 3/4 years old it can damage the roof of the mouth.
try weaning him during the day,if you can but i definatly wouldnt cause any upset over him not having it,tbh.

some nurseries have a dummy box which the child puts the dummy in whilst they are there, maybe you could try something like that putting it in first thing and letting him have it back for a bit at night, then wean him off maybe after a few days of going all day without it he won't want it back

Our girls have dummies for bed, emergencies and injuries and we try to keep it out of sight the rest of the time.
Maybe you could do the same as us, a slow wean off it and eventually no need at all?

my boy never really bothered with a dummy until recently hes nearly 2 and now he grabs for it in the daytime. i have to admit weve given in far too much lately with the stress of my pregnancy and doing the house up. think ive made my bed if you know what i mean. i have just started calling it dirty dummy now in the day time and trying ot give it him only at sleep time. also tried talking to hime about giving it to baby when he arrives-although io was frowned upon for saying this by someone-who said it was cruel.

Could you try gradually replacing it with another transitional object he may take to like a teddy or blanket? He may need some sort of comfort for now.....

He only has it in bed to sleep, I am biting the bullet off to Cyprus and not taking it!!! New environment ect, we will see....

Before I had my son, I had no particular views on dummies. But since then, I've noticed that a lot of my friends seem to have strong negative opinions about them. But all they say is that it's a pain to wean your baby off them.

Is this the only downside to dummies, or is there anything else? My 7-week-old baby has just started using them, and I'm amazed at the difference it makes: just stick it in, and he falls asleep. Before, he would cry for ages so that I held him and he could fall asleep in my arms, which meant I couldn't get on with things for quite a while.

What do you think?

I think - whatever makes your happy baby.
I haven't seen many kids going to school with a dummy in their mouths so I wouldn't worry about the weaning stage. There's lots of tricks that you can try for removing that later e.g bury it the garden etc...

My baby was and still is a thumbsucker and I have had some horrible remarks from family about that but from day 1 his thumb was in his mouth. I have decided life is too short to stress about it.

I think we can beat ourselves up about subjects like this - so I would relax about it and let your baby be happy ( then you will be!)

Hi there,

I have used dummies with both mine. I think they are great as a soother & for helping them get to sleep. DD1 just stopped using hers herself when she was about 2 as she realised that if she didn't have it she could stay awake longer.

I don't to see older kids with them & also when they are playing. I don't see the point.

I say go with whatever works for you. I hate people giving negative opinions on decisions you make. One small downside is that when they are a bit older it can wake them up if they can't find their dummy or throw it out of the cot (Libby's favourite pastime).

My four year old had to throw away her dummy when she was two because it was distorting her teeth, the dentist told her to throw it away and she lobbed it into the bin without a murmur, we thought there would have been tantrums because she was very attached to it.
My 9 month old doesnt have one and doesnt seem to need one, dummys are great if theyre needed- Id say it was a matter of personal choice. Some have them, some dont.

Dummies used to be frowned upon as they didnt look tasteful, particularly as children get older & when they do get older they can cause probs for their teeth.

However, most people in the know are changing their opinions since evidence was published which demonstrated that being settled at night with a dummy reduced the risk of cot death.

Also who gives a monkeys what they look like if they comfort your baby? Happy baby is most important as is your sanity. If a baby is able to soothe themselves they feel secure, sleep better & feel better & you have more energy to play & put positive input into parenting. If a baby can learn to soothe themselves to sleep at night with the help of a dummy this can develop really healthy sleep associations. I know people who think dummies are ugly so didnt allow their babies to have them, but have toddlers with terrible sleep problems.

Also whilst it may or may not be easy you can take the dummy off them (most people I know havent had any trouble but I know it can take some negotiating with some children) but you cannot remove their thumb. i know someone who was recommended to use a dummy by her dentist with her baby as her other children thumb sucked so much it distorted their teeth.

Only time i dont agree with dummies is when used instead of meeting a baby's basic needs ie rather than feeding them or playing with them

Of course its personal choice but if it works for you and baby is happy stuff what others think. There are far more important things to worry about :)

ps my baby doesnt use a dummy, but only because she's not interested but I would give her one if it soothed her. its a big scary world for a tiny wee baby

We use a dummy with DD. She has great comfort from it and it does help her a lot. Although I do try to limit the time she has it now that she is over 1. I think it stops her from talking as much, so try to limit it to bedtime, but this doesn't always work out. She managed for 3 days and 2 nights without it recently, but then wouldn't settle so out it came again.

The only thing is that I don't like older children with dummies and really want her to stop before she is 2. I also think that it's better to use a dummy than them sucking their thumbs, as you can get rid of a dummy, but not a thumb!

Our twins are 2. One took to dummies the second my mother brought some int he hospital and would spend hours desperately inhalling to suck the dummy back toward herself when it fell out ( I captured that on camera for hilaritys sake). The other was much less bothered.
The same passionate twin is still passionate for dummies and won't even contemplate sleeping without one but is perfectly happy to be dummy free all day.
The other twin couldn't give two hoots and would happily spend her life dummy free if not for being persuaded that it's higly desireable by the stronger personality sibling!
We are slowly phasing them out and part of my plan was to get them to hang them on the Christmas tree this year but we will probably have moved house just a week previously so I don't know yet. I'll see how it goes once we move.
However, I agree with those who posted about sanity. For those babies who want them and those mummies who need them, dummies keep families operating as humans instead of raving loonies :D
I hate to see children speaking around dummies so I'm careful to get them to spit them out if they speak but since it's pretty much only bedtime it isn't an issue.
Fingers crossed for the Christmas tree trick :)

I'm so glad to see such reason and sanity, lol!

I strongly feel dummies are fine if a baby needs/wants them. Sanity providers? YES!

I also feel that as they get older they should be limited to sleeping times only, which pretty much negates the main problems - speech issues, teeth issues, anti-dummy frowning by others. Problem solved.

And, don't look now, but....
:o I couldn't find one earlier for my son, and as he had literally just been given a new toy, I heard myself saying, 'well now you have that, you don't need a dummy anymore, do you?' and :o he agreed! and :o he went to bed without one for the first time ever!

:shocked: Could this be it?

Tune in tomorrow night to find out...

Dummines are definatley sanity savers!

Babycamrat is 5 months old and they are fantastic for getting him off to sleep, or hlping calm him down when he gets really upset. Not too worried about when he gets a little older, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it!

Must admit though, before he was born I was one of those people who said he'd never have one.... amazing what life is like in the real world!

DS1 had them and was a horror to get off them. DS2 decided he didn't want one from day 1 and has never had one. I think its down to the child really :)

My view on most things related to bringing up my daughter is sod what other people think. Whatever we feel comfortable with is what we do.

I had no issue at all with a dummy and when she used to scream for no reason and I was ready for sticking my head in the gas oven I tried for hours with a dummy and she wouldn’t entertain it. We bought some cheap cherry ones which she used for about 2 minutes then gave up.

She still doesn’t have one but her cousin Lubybell junior has one and it is her favourite game pinching it of Libby and making her cry I always have one with me as well because they have helped with her teething as she bites them more than anything.

After that rant I will say I don’t like to see children playing with them in or older children with them in

However, most people in the know are changing their opinions since evidence was published which demonstrated that being settled at night with a dummy reduced the risk of cot death.


Might have to take that back as apparently the research was misquoted and not quite that simple. will try to find the original literature and see what the deal is

You shouldn't deliberately give a dummy to a very young baby, because it simulates the nipple. If a baby is hungry and you give it a dummy to shut it up, it will shut up, but will stay hungry, and will stay shut up until it gets reeeeallly hungry (the dummy stimulates the baby to produce all the saliva and secrete enzymes into its stomach that stops it feeling hungry as it is anticipating the arrival of food in its stomach). Hence, until your baby is old enough to know the difference between dummy and nipple (3 weeks is the normal arbitrary time point for not getting confused between bottles/nipples, so is probably the same for a dummy, as long as the baby is breastfed - longer if it's bottle fed) you shouldn't use one, you may be leaving your baby hungry (and by inference slowing its growth, preventing it from getting into a routine, and making it grumpy).

The tooth argument, as most very newly qualified dentists could probably tell you, isn't quite what it used to be. Tehre's been a fair amount of research into what thumb/dummy sucking does to your teeth, and it seems that the answer is very very little in the long run - until the kid is about 4 and forming adult teeth, and most kids have stopped thumb sucking by then of their own accord. There's some minor effects on the muscles around the face, especially in dummy suckers (who don't take the dummy out while they do anything, unlike thumb suckers), but it seems to gradually wear off as the child gets older anyway.

Well, a little update.

Cosycub stayed asleep last night!:clap:...
and not another word has been said about it by any of us, including him (part of me thinks I should praise him for giving it up, another part says 'don't mention it, he'll remember it exists'...anyone got an idea on this?).

He didn't nap, which I put down to lack of dummy, tho he never mentioned it (he doesn't ever have one for naps at nursery, but always, always at home)...so we were both shattered by 4pm, but it's a small price to pay if we've cracked it.

But more importantly, he went down tonight quite happily with never a word about it!!! :banana::banana::banana:

Maybe I'm celebrating a little early, but it's been so easy...and even if he does suddenly remember and want it, I think we will draw the line here. Mind, if he starts sucking his thumb I may rethink...:P

My four year old had to throw away her dummy when she was two because it was distorting her teeth, the dentist told her to throw it away


mine too jabberwocky.
my little boy went to the dentist and as soon as she saw my 3yr old daughters teeth she said she needed to get rid of it as her teeth have arched upwards.
she binned it there and then and i was expecting her to be a right terror but shes not too bad at all.

My son had a dummy but only till 9 months old through his own choice. He only liked the ones that had been sucked so much they went fat and sticky and picked up every piece of fluff :gag:once he lost the last fat sticky one we owned he never bothered with another, he was restless and upset for a few days but soon got over it. A child will give up their dummy on their own accord when they feel ready some sooner than others sometimes it takes them till they go to school and realise the other children don't have them.

9 days and still going strong...

I'm finding it hard to get him to go down for a nap without, however - so he's driving me a little crazy...:gag:

take heart, dummie users, it's better than thumb sucking. We have a real problem with my 6 year old and sucking her thumb is spoiling her teeth.

take heart, dummie users, it's better than thumb sucking. We have a real problem with my 6 year old and sucking her thumb is spoiling her teeth.

not so easy to enforce the absence of a thumb, I guess...

I was a thumb sucker until I was about 10, revolting as that is in retrospect. Given how much I used to enjoy sucking my thumb and how much comfort it gave me when I was unhappy I'm glad I did though, and consequently I get very argumentative with my family when they comment about babybaby sucking hers. I think that particularly for a young baby for which life is very confusing any form of comfort/passtime is good.

not so easy to enforce the absence of a thumb, I guess...

I was a thumb sucker until I was about 10, revolting as that is in retrospect. Given how much I used to enjoy sucking my thumb and how much comfort it gave me when I was unhappy I'm glad I did though, and consequently I get very argumentative with my family when they comment about babybaby sucking hers. I think that particularly for a young baby for which life is very confusing any form of comfort/passtime is good.

No, it's not. We tried to replace it with a dummy but it failed. Our dentist (who is a homeopathic dentist as well as a cranial osteopath, and I have much respect for) has remarked how my daughters face shape is changing and her mouth is begining to protrude as well as her palette being pushed forward.
Luckily she is now of an age where she has noted his advice and will remind herself during the day.
We have allowed her to do this at bedtime though. Funnily enough my daughter was thumb sucking in the womb and straight from birth. She also refused to be breast fed and a battle to continue with it until she was 5 1/2 months made her wieght become a concern?!

How much of her waking life does she spend with her thumb in her mouth?

I ask because our youngest also sucked her thumb in the womb and from then on. I was wondering how much thumbsucking you needed to do before it became a concern.

How much of her waking life does she spend with her thumb in her mouth?

I ask because our youngest also sucked her thumb in the womb and from then on. I was wondering how much thumbsucking you needed to do before it became a concern.

She's 6 now and has usually done it when her hands have not been active, but even then she would stop something to do it. She just zones out. It does come out to talk though.

So would you say it was more than an hour a day in total?

I was determined that my son wouldnt have a dummy (this had been instilled by my mother, who hated them with a passion). However a dummy appeared when the little darling suffered terrible colic at a few weeks old.:hihi:

He is two and a half now and we have been dummy free for 6days. We told him it had gone in the bin truck (which comes on a Friday). He has accepted this better than we thought and can easily get to sleep without it. He is still asking for it when he is tired, but we just remind him its in the bin truck and he just accepts it.

I cannot believe how lightly we have got off so far.:suspect:

So would you say it was more than an hour a day in total?

Yes, probably, as she was having to be reminded at school too.

Oh, and then the amount of time she spends doing it while asleep; It hardly ever falls out when she is sleeping, you can hear her doing it like maggie in the simpsons.

hi, just wondering everyones thoughts, my 4 1/2 week old has started to put his hand to his mouth and start sucking his little thumb, I really dont want him doing this so debating giving a dummy, I dont know whether to do this or just let him carry on as he is......any advice would be much appreciated.

We decided to use dummies, well no, my mum brought dummies and one of the girls took to them instantly, even though we weren't keen, kinda glad we did though, it's been a useful tool.
My view is that you can take a dummy away when you feel enough is enough but you can't take the thumb!
A friend of mine has the view that the thumb is most portablet and you can't lose it.
Fair enough but I'm not keen on thumbsuckers at age 5 and I recall someone I went to school with who sucked her thumb (at school and out of mums sight until aged 9 at least) and stroked her nose at the same time, she now has a really peculiar shaped nose.
I'd go for orthodontic dummies personally.

I'd go for dummies everytime. Like Zebra said, you can take away the dummy but not the thumb. I know someone who STILL sucks her thumb at the age of 39 and boy, does she look stupid!

my daughter always spat out her dummy so i took it away she sucked her thumb instead but only when shes tired now and shes nearly seven

i'd say go with the dummy. i sucked & still do suck my fingers even at 24. ok so i only really suck them now when extreamly tired or really upset & need to confort myself but growing up it caused lots of battles with my dad who hated it.

at least you can chuck the dummys or get the little one to chuck the dummy when older. my fingers & thumb are always there & i really wouldnt want to have them amputated just to stop the sucking.

I'd go with thumb - at least it has to come out of the mouth if both hands are to be used at once, so it's not in the mouth as often as a dummy. Also, personally I find dummies pretty nauseating - the amount of associated saliva really bothers me :gag: which doesn't seem to happen so much with thumbs. Much more portable as previously mentioned, too.

My daughter was born sucking her thumb, she is 11 nah, and still sucks it, she will not stop, no matter wat i try, My friend who is 51 she still sucks her thumb. LOL.

Thumbs are great in the night when they wake up they so find it, saves u getting in and out of bed looking for the dummy,

Personally i do not like to see a dummy in a child over the age of 2. Its so easy to remove the dummy, but thumb i dont think they ever stop.

Another i really dislike tea/coffee in a baby's bottle, it looks awful and i could, be sick to see it.

I too went the dummy route with my little boy. I found it invaluable, as he happily sucked it instead of crying when not hungry but just wanting something in his mouth, it helped him settle to sleep (hallelujah!), and he has never felt the need to suck his thumb.

I just have a few rules that I think help to make it more acceptable - dummies are for specific times, not round the clock. You will get the hang of when your child needs one and when it should be removed...you should not let them get used to having it in their mouth every minute.
Especially when they start to make noises and practice speech, I believe the dummy should only be used when they are preparing to sleep or are upset. And as soon as you can, I'd dump it.
Cosycub traded his dummy for a coveted toy one night, totally unplanned, and never looked back - hoorah! He was 2.5 years. The only ill effect was that he would no longer settle for a daytime nap; but hey, he's really tired at bedtime, lol.

So all in all, I'm for dummies - but I really hate to see them plugged into babies and children non-stop.

It's got to be a dummy every time. A dummy can be removed at any time, both my kids went off theirs quite early (around when they started to get teeth) so I don't think they have any lasting effects on their mouths.
I really hate to see a child with their thumb in their mouth, stroking their nose:gag: especially as the child gets older, I think it's gross. I have known teenagers to do it and it's just horrid especially when their parents still think it's "cute" :gag:

thanks everyone for your responses, cosy thanks for the advice I agree with what u said, tried the dummy last night when little one was getting restless (but just been fed) he wouldn't open his mouth for me to put it in, I will try again tonight because he will quite happily put his hand in!! I am also breastfeeding and wondering if he wont take dummy because of this, getting worried he wont take bottle when i try expressing, think I will try this fairly soon.

I breastfed for the first 6 months, and mine took a dummy - but he also took a bottle from Day 1 (I still put this down to an early experience with bottles in hospital, and disagree with the idea that bottles and dummies put them off breastfeeding, but that's just my experience).

It's worth trying again, but also worth considering that some babies just won't take a dummy - breastfed, thumbsucking, or not.
And sucking on their hands or thumb doesn't have to mean they become a thumbsucker, either. So not to worry, either way.
I don't think there's anything particularly straightforward about baby behaviour, lol. Each one wants to do it differently...

I have always been against dummies, and we have never used them for our kids. The arguement that seeing kids sucking thumbs as they grow older is horrible also swings the other way - nothing is worse than seeing a 5 year old with a dummy still taged round their next (except, perhaps, seeing some parents use the dummy to simply shut their child up rather than actually trying to find out what they are upset about). Neither our eldest (aged 5) or his sister (aged 2) still suck thumbs as they stopped doing it themselves without any problems.

Nope, as my own mother said, if we were meant to have dummies then our thumbs (or fists in my big sisters case) wouldn't fit so snug into the gob :)

I think dummies. My daughter was never interested in them untill my son was born, but with my son they were essential for my sanity. He was a comfort sucker and wanted me to feed him constantly. If it wasnt for having a dummy then i would have constanly had to breastfeed him. Not really possible with a two year old trying to be patient in getting some attention from mummy.

I have always been against dummies, and we have never used them for our kids. The arguement that seeing kids sucking thumbs as they grow older is horrible also swings the other way - nothing is worse than seeing a 5 year old with a dummy still taged round their next (except, perhaps, seeing some parents use the dummy to simply shut their child up rather than actually trying to find out what they are upset about). Neither our eldest (aged 5) or his sister (aged 2) still suck thumbs as they stopped doing it themselves without any problems.

Nope, as my own mother said, if we were meant to have dummies then our thumbs (or fists in my big sisters case) wouldn't fit so snug into the gob :)

However, as I said in my post, that is clearly not a proper way to use a dummy, and I'm guessing there's a huge number of parents using a dummy out there properly - but you don't know about it because they use them when needed rather than constantly.

I agree, use it poorly, and it is a handicap for a child; but use it properly, and sparingly, and it's a fantastic tool.

On the other hand, as I also said - some babies just won't take one, and some don't need one - they're all different. :)

I used to suck my thumb and when i was 11 i had to have dental treatment because of it, when they took an impression my thumb fitted into the roof of my mouth!!! so i think i would go for the dummy option so as not to damage the teeth !!!

I hate dummies with a vegeance..
they are harbourers of all kinds of illness, it really grates on my nerves when i see mums who pick up a dropped dummy and pop it in their own mouth to 'clean' it before puttin it straight back in babies mouth.. the illness that killed my oldest daughter can be passed on this way from carriers (who wont know they are carriers til its too late)

We have to spell dummy in our house so as not to alert Twingle 2 to her favourite soother being missing.
We took twingles for measuring for car seats today and whilst in Mothercare we had a look at toys to see what I could buy in exchange for throwing the dummy away for both twingles.
I was already weaning them off them when we moved house and suddenly they had become much more important to them as some sort of continuity and safety. I've managed to get them down to just 5 minutes at night whilst they fall asleep and we've been doing that a few months but it's already overdue.
So, after offering no end of expensive toys in exchange for throwing them away, Twingle 2 was adamant that no toy would suffice but Twingle 1 was won over by a talking Pablo (from Backyardigans).
We even stood in front of the dummy display rack which must have been torture as she did her 'inhale the dummy' routine in front of such glory!
I was on the verge of giving up when she spotted the bubbles and agreed, briefly, to give up the dummy for the bubbles. Twingle 1 then decided Pablo was no patch on Little Mermaid bubbles and dispoed of the poor penguin accordingly.
We bought the bubbles in a pretend dummy throwing away ceremony in the shop with the assistant playing along and both girls left happily and clutched the bubble bottles tightly all the way home.
At bed time we had a few minutes of fuss, pretend desperation for the loo and bed trampolining and repetative ' but you threw it away for the bubbles' before they both gave up and at the moment..... silence is golden, golden!

woo hoo that sounds good! My 7 year old was very attached to his (and the grubby piece of silk he always had tied round it) I think he was just 3 when we had a "ceremony" of throwing them all into the garden when we were on holiday, "for the birds to take for their little babies, as they could not go shopping for dummies, and you could hear the baby birds crying" How wonderful those seagull noises were at the time :hihi:

Oooh well done! My friend has had a nightmare trying to get hers off her 3 year old, in fact she's given up trying for now! I had a similar problem but with breastfeeding- unfortunately I couldn't throw my boobs away and my little one would try and get some all the time, for comfort. In the end I had to put up with a few hard days of her screaming and clawing at me as I consistently refused it during the day, but it was worth it. She'll ask occasionally if very tired or upset but only hlaf heartedly and I can cuddle her to sleep without being mauled now which is lovely. Still have to drop the night and morning one though!

ooh thanks saff, i'm going through this at the moment and its good to hear its possible lol. THEN we'll wean off the dummy....I might just leave home now :roll:

Wel asked the dentist to have a quiet word with my oldest when she was two and after he`d finished with her, she lobbed her dummy into the bin without us asking her.

well Santa took mini savs Dummys on her 3rd birthday (20th November) and used them to make her bike he brought her at xmas :hihi::hihi:

She was fine without until a month ago she was really ill and asked us to ask santa to bring her one to borrow for the night:P

well Santa took mini savs Dummys on her 3rd birthday (20th November) and used them to make her bike he brought her at xmas :hihi::hihi:

She was fine without until a month ago she was really ill and asked us to ask santa to bring her one to borrow for the night:P

Brilliant! :D

I just read that to the oh and shes laughing and crying at the same time now!

Cosycub traded his for an action man at the grand old age of 2(ish). And never, ever looked back. However, I also had to make a sacrifice - daytime naps. He absolutely refused them from that moment on, having always used the dummy to go to sleep.

It's the right decision to do it nice and early - I witnessed a couple of children aged approximatly 7 and 9 the other day run out of their house with dummies firmly installed in their mouths. I'm sorry, but I think that's well and truly beyond the realms of the acceptable.:gag:

well Santa took mini savs Dummys on her 3rd birthday (20th November) and used them to make her bike he brought her at xmas :hihi::hihi:

She was fine without until a month ago she was really ill and asked us to ask santa to bring her one to borrow for the night:P
Awwww, that's sweet!
It was my plan to hang them on the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve to be exchanged for presents but we moved on 20th December and they obviously felt somewhat unsettled so we had no chance :(
Still, they are fast asleep for now. Fingers crossed for no emergencies over night and and easy night tomorrow :)

7 and 9 OMG! That's awful. I heard of another child today aged 7 who had one and I was gobsmacked!

I've seen kids going to school with them in, so i guess around age 4, 5 or 6ish. It just looks so WRONG! Must admit, mine were all only allowed to have them for daytime naps or at bedtime, from around 2 years old, or just under. Never when we were out n about. I'm planning on the same kind of thing this time around with the 2 youngest.

My kids were like this with bottles. They would use proper cups all through the day but liked a bottle for comfort at night. They barely even used to drink any of the milk in it though lol. My mum said they were short at the hospital and would they give them theirs for the tiny babies. That was it never asked for again. Nobody made a fuss though which helped. I think one night my little boy asked for his but I just said they went to the hospital remember. All he said was oh yeah and went to bed.

ooh thanks saff, i'm going through this at the moment and its good to hear its possible lol. THEN we'll wean off the dummy....I might just leave home now :roll:

Have to admit I had several failed attempts- it just stopped the crying! In the end I just did one day at a time. Good luck x

Well done! I am dreading this with Babybell. She is much more attached to her dummy than me eldest ever was. She sort of naturally ditched hers when she was about two. She only ever had it when she was going to sleep anyway. She realised that it made her go to sleep & she could stay awake longer if she spat it out. I know it isn't going to be that easy this time round.

I was 10 before I got rid of my dummy. I thought it was perfectly normal to have one as late as that and looking back, I often wonder if thats a reason I have such a hard time jacking in smoking.
They say a cig is an adults version of a dummy dont they...?

my youngest girls (age 1yr &2yrs) were nightmares with their dummys never had them out of their mouths so we got them to hang them on the xmas tree on xmas eve and told them santa would bring them new toys and presents. they got up xmas morn and their eyes lit up but once the prezzis were open they wanted dummys back but we explaind santa had took them and they finally forgot about the dummys and started on the chocolate.

I've got the dreaded weaning off the dummy to come soon. I've put it off what with us moving and she has been out of sorts. She rarely has it in the day (if I remember to hide it) and only has it at night to go to sleep. I'm not sure on how we are going to approach it yet or when.

some great ideas, i'm definetely going to try the christmas one as she will have just turned 2 then, and I think thats around the best age, old enough to understand reasoning but young enough for it not to look silly lol

We're on night two and we had some objections as they went to bed, calling out for 'bugbear' (their name for dummies) but |I firmly reminded them of their choice to put them in the bin and have bubbles and left the room.
After one more visit they settled and went to sleep.
I think this is a dancing banana moment :banana::clap::banana::headbang::banana::clap:

DS 1 only had it to sleep with from about a yr old, and when he got to 18 months the dentist told me it was affecting his teeth. It was hard but we got there in the end, just perseverance.

DS2 never had a dummy, even the smallest ones made him gag so I just left him without one.

We're on night two and we had some objections as they went to bed, calling out for 'bugbear' (their name for dummies) but |I firmly reminded them of their choice to put them in the bin and have bubbles and left the room.
After one more visit they settled and went to sleep.
I think this is a dancing banana moment :banana::clap::banana::headbang::banana::clap:

Whoooohoooo!!!! :D Congratulations!

I've persevered, we had 3 or 4 non dummy nights and all was going well.
This afternoon I went out and the OH was in with the girls who needed a nap after partying late last night.
The buffoon gave them their dummies in order to get them to settle quicker because he wanted some extra kip since he was on nights.
Now I can understand he needs sleep but to undo all the work I've put into it earlier this week and he hasn't even been here to deal with it once, I'm furious.
Here we are at 9.30pm and the girls are bouncing around like Tigger on Red Bull!
So, though previously I had put the dummies out of sight and reach, now I've had to throw them away because Daddy needs them so much! Sad!

Oh how annoying!! Blinking dads! Hopefully it'll only be a little setback rather than back to square 1.

Bad Daddy, I can just imagine your two bouncing around like Tigger this made me laugh, seriously though I bet you were a mite annoyed.

A mite annoyed? He told me in front of a visitor (wuss) so I said sweetly 'It's ok, I'll just kill you later!'
We had words about it later and his defence was that he needed sleep.
They finally went to sleep around 10.15 last night.

I've just put them to bed and not a sound can be heard, fingers crossed we continue this way!

We decided that it was time to get rid of the dummy for dd2. she's 15months. She went to sleep yesterday afternoon with no dummy which made the decision for us really. She went down without one last night and went straight to sleep. I was amazed.

The childminder said she wouldn't sleep today and really missed it so I was dreading putting her down tonight. Imagine my surprise when she only moaned for about 5mins and has gone to sleep!

Could it be that easy? Am I to prepare myself for some nights of hell soon? Arggghhhh

Really, don't panic. Cosycub was 2, and he never looked back as far as night time sleeps went. I wondered why I'd made such a fuss. It was simple.:thumbsup:


But...


He never took a daytime nap again (except in the car).:(



Wolfcub has a dummy now, tho it took some effort to get him to take one, and it's interchangeable with a muslin square. I think dummies are life savers and well worth any minor hassle when it's time to get rid.
Saying that, neither of my children EVER have/had a dummy except to sleep with. If it's never an option to wander about with it, it doesn't happen. So no speech problems, no teeth problems, no disapproving looks.

dd2 likes her dummy and says "dummy" she went for her nap fine this morning without her dummy but she has her MMR this afternoon and daddy wants to take her dummy with him cause "she'll need the comfort" I have insisted that she doesn't have it and that we find other ways to comfort her instead.

I feel so sorry for her though and I feel cruel!

It's for the best in the long run is what i keep telling myself xx

my sonn is now 13 months and he has had a dummy from 1 weeks old which the heat visitor reccomended as he had colic and i am a single parent it was getting soooo ahrd she said it would help, and by god it did, but then i thought id never get him off it, and i dontknow why but a month ago now he just turned it down one day and never touched once since just turns his head, has anybody eses child done this on there own this young i was pleasently suprised lol