Hm... I've read a few melancholy posts. I just wanted to ask the long-term couples these questions.

Do you actually believe your partner will make you happy forever after ?
Or do you have to work at it to be happy ? Or does life changes, and you go with it ?

(Dare I ask this next Q...)
Was there at any one point in time that you would stray from your relationship with your partner ?
For the couples that were married a long time, were there tough moments in your marriage ? What did you do, or how did you handle it ?


From a curious young pleb. :)

Hm... I've read a few melancholy posts. I just wanted to ask the long-term couples these questions.

Do you actually believe your partner will make you happy forever after ?
Or do you have to work at it to be happy ? Or does life changes, and you go with it ?

(Dare I ask this next Q...)
Was there at any one point in time that you would stray from your relationship with your partner ?
For the couples that were married a long time, were there tough moments in your marriage ? What did you do, or how did you handle it ?


From a curious young pleb. :)Tough moments ??You bet !!! :o

My present partner and I are a perfect couple. We`ve been together now since 2002. I met her online in early 2001. When my son died in December of 2001, my then partner and I decided to go our seperate ways after 20 years of giving each other hell, so I got a little flat, hired a van and drove to Leicester to meet and collect this women Id fallen for in a chatroom and meet her for the first time..
I finally found her home, met her sister, brother and parents and got on with them all immediately.
We then drove back to Sheffield and lived there for the next 6 months or so.

What Im trying to say is, when you meet the right person, you know it IMMEDIATELY!
Life does change but a solid couple changes to adapt to it.

As for straying... Shes 15 years younger than I am, and she makes sure that Im usually too tired to even think about straying. As for her straying, she promises that she never will and I trust her as much as she trusts me.
Tough moments...
We had tough moments from the very start because I was a mess after the death of my son and in lots of ways Im still messed up, we have never had a row, never raised our vioces to each other or at our three year old daughter.
The tough times merely make the good times seem better.

My, that was a long one.
As the actress said to the bishop.

Right now I believe my partner will make me happy forever. Yes we have to work at it but it's worth it many times over. I've strayed once and so has he - but never again. It's a beautiful thing we have.

You know that you guys say that you don't argue...and it's somethign I've come across other say before too. I didn't think it's possible. Surely, there's things you dislike, or don't like a certain action your partner did etc.

Wouldn't such holding back means you will build up a great big balls of resentments ?

My present partner and I are a perfect couple. We`ve been together now since 2002. I met her online in early 2001. When my son died in December of 2001, my then partner and I decided to go our seperate ways after 20 years of giving each other hell, so I got a little flat, hired a van and drove to Leicester to meet and collect this women Id fallen for in a chatroom and meet her for the first time..
I finally found her home, met her sister, brother and parents and got on with them all immediately.
We then drove back to Sheffield and lived there for the next 6 months or so.

What Im trying to say is, when you meet the right person, you know it IMMEDIATELY!
Life does change but a solid couple changes to adapt to it.

As for straying... Shes 15 years younger than I am, and she makes sure that Im usually too tired to even think about straying. As for her straying, she promises that she never will and I trust her as much as she trusts me.
Tough moments...
We had tough moments from the very start because I was a mess after the death of my son and in lots of ways Im still messed up, we have never had a row, never raised our vioces to each other or at our three year old daughter.
The tough times merely make the good times seem better.

My, that was a long one.
As the actress said to the bishop.Jabberwocky,I never believed anyone could meet"on line" but youve proved they can.Congratulations.Your posts are very intelligent,and make me laugh. :thumbsup:

My present partner and I are a perfect couple. We`ve been together now since 2002. I met her online in early 2001. When my son died in December of 2001, my then partner and I decided to go our seperate ways after 20 years of giving each other hell, so I got a little flat, hired a van and drove to Leicester to meet and collect this women Id fallen for in a chatroom and meet her for the first time..
I finally found her home, met her sister, brother and parents and got on with them all immediately.
We then drove back to Sheffield and lived there for the next 6 months or so.

What Im trying to say is, when you meet the right person, you know it IMMEDIATELY!
Life does change but a solid couple changes to adapt to it.

As for straying... Shes 15 years younger than I am, and she makes sure that Im usually too tired to even think about straying. As for her straying, she promises that she never will and I trust her as much as she trusts me.
Tough moments...
We had tough moments from the very start because I was a mess after the death of my son and in lots of ways Im still messed up, we have never had a row, never raised our vioces to each other or at our three year old daughter.
The tough times merely make the good times seem better.

My, that was a long one.
As the actress said to the bishop.
Awww thats a lovely story Jabber :)

You know that you guys say that you don't argue...and it's somethign I've come across other say before too. I didn't think it's possible. Surely, there's things you dislike, or don't like a certain action your partner did etc.

Wouldn't such holding back means you will build up a great big balls of resentments ?
We simply never have anything to argue about. Its sickening I know, and sometimes I think that maybe theres something building up thats one day going to explode in a murderous fury.
We both have ways that irritate each other, but we realise that there are worse things in life to worry about. We just shrug each others irritating points off, the few that there are. They arent important.
I know im lucky, after the 20 years I had before, I KNOW Im damn lucky.

We simply never have anything to argue about. Its sickening I know, and sometimes I think that maybe theres something building up thats one day going to explode in a murderous fury.
We both have ways that irritate each other, but we realise that there are worse things in life to worry about. We just shrug each others irritating points off, the few that there are. They arent important.
I know im lucky, after the 20 years I had before, I KNOW Im damn lucky.
Having said that, Ill probably be on the noisy end of a chainsaw one of these days.:D

Having said that, Ill probably be on the noisy end of a chainsaw one of these days.:D
LOL... you do like living dangerously, eh ?

LOL... you do like living dangerously, eh ?
Well. Lets just say that I have a nasty habit of tormenting females.
Julie has an almost supernatural patience but,,, one of these days...

Taking the camera into the bathroom when she was in there a few weeks ago was almost the last straw.:hihi:

Having said that, Ill probably be on the noisy end of a chainsaw one of these days.:D

Yeah......and it's not gonna belong to his girlfriend either :hihi:

Yeah......and it's not gonna belong to his girlfriend either :hihi:
SEE???
They hate me! Women hate me!!!!!

SEE???
They hate me! Women hate me!!!!!

We love you really Jabber :love: :rolleyes:

We love you really Jabber :love: :rolleyes:
Yeah. Like a big game hunter loves a lion..."My what a magnificent animal"

BANG!

Yeah. Like a big game hunter loves a lion..."My what a magnificent animal"

BANG!

I'm being serious for once :D

OMG I know where you are coming from!
Could've strayed so many times but remember the love we have had for each other when things were bad between us.
So you work through it, give a little & take a little & then fall in love all over again.
You've gotta ride through the bad times to enjoy the good times.
My 11 year relationship is proof of this.

Me and the missus, 32 years of marriage, still argue as much as we did when we were "courting". After all the years together we know all our faults, and in my case that amounts to a hell of a lot, but we accept who we are and I love her faults, it is what makes her who she is and why I love her. Most of the time we miss each other when we are apart, yet sometimes get on each other`s nerves when we are constantly together. We are lucky enough to want to support each other, to work as a team, which is unusual for me because being part of a team I find abhorrent, probably from my working days. I dont know what the secret is to a perfect marriage, does it exist? I certainly hope it will remain happy ever after, but if Amanda Holden decides to kidnap me and make me her "love thing", who knows.:hihi:

Me and Mr Strix used to be like chalk and cheese. We met because we lived in the same house, and found we both liked to go about things such as housework the same way :loopy:

Having figured out that we could live together easily, the rest was a bit harder. Our music tastes both had to change a bit if we were ever going to enjoy a night out, but live music sorted that out, we had to work at finding things to do together, so rollerblading and Tae Kwon Do became our hobbies.

I despair of the couples who post on here moaning about whether or not they are going to go to weddings together, visit family, blah, blah....

How exactly do you have a relationship under those conditions? :huh:

Hm... I've read a few melancholy posts. I just wanted to ask the long-term couples these questions.

Do you actually believe your partner will make you happy forever after ?
Or do you have to work at it to be happy ? Or does life changes, and you go with it ?

(Dare I ask this next Q...)
Was there at any one point in time that you would stray from your relationship with your partner ?
For the couples that were married a long time, were there tough moments in your marriage ? What did you do, or how did you handle it ?


From a curious young pleb. :)

Having been married 50 years doesn't make me an expert but...
Actually I don't think another person CAN make you happy but you can share happiness. Of course you have to work at marriage especially if you're opposites as Himself and me are. Most people have tough times - you just have to learn to battle them together- be on each others side as it were. Sometimes (often) we've had the most horrendous arguments- but managed to get over them the next day. No sulking!
Last but not least I expect most couples have 'fancied' someone else on occasion, the secret is make sure it is just a 'fancy'.
PS I once 'left' him but my Dad made me go back home to cook 'the lads' tea;)

I love my husband dearly (despite his faults) and do plan to spend the rest of my life with him.
It's really hard work to keep a marriage alive, sometimes you forget what it was that brought you together initially but you have to refresh your memories by re-inacting them again. Many times we have visited places we went to when we first got together just to get those feelings back and to remind ourselves of the type of people we were prior to marriage, mortgages and kids. I would never consider cheating as I believe that 9 times out of 10 people who stray do so because their marriage has lost it's spark and they think they can find it in somebody else.
Sad truth is ( and I say this from experience) if you can't take the time to work through the rough patches with your partner then the likely hood is that you will find yourself in exactly the same situation - just with someone new.

that is true taylor but sometimes you cant work threw rough times.I have been with my hubby for 18 years but to be truthful cant say if we will stay together for years to cum:)

Hm... I've read a few melancholy posts. I just wanted to ask the long-term couples these questions.

Do you actually believe your partner will make you happy forever after ?
Or do you have to work at it to be happy ? Or does life changes, and you go with it ?

(Dare I ask this next Q...)
Was there at any one point in time that you would stray from your relationship with your partner ?
For the couples that were married a long time, were there tough moments in your marriage ? What did you do, or how did you handle it ?

From a curious young pleb. :)

Its an interesting one this, and a topic I have discussed with someone on here at great length with as well.

In relationships you have to work you ass off to keep them going, but they cant be on sided though ie: one partner gets lazy and dosent want to please the other one- which I'm sorry to say - if a good excuse for the ignored partner to cheat if necessary to make themselves happier.

I know that sounds harsh- and I would only agree to someone cheating ONLY IF they had tried everything to sort the relationship beforehand.

If people have to be told time and time again about something in a relationship and wont change, sorry, if the other partner feels neglected- that gives them strong grounds to cheat I'd say.

There's so many things that can happen in life, so whether we will be together the rest of our lives- we'll have to see.

now dont you be given anyone ideas:hihi: :hihi:

I reckon it needs to be said though :hihi:

If someone is being lazy and not treating their partner in a relationship- more fool them, then only have themselves to blame for letting the other person slip away possibly to someone else!

Not that I condone cheating mind- BUT, if someone has tried really hard to change something in a relationship ie: sex life and the other person cant be bothered to work on it, then sorry, the person who feels neglected has the right to be happy- and if it needs an experience with someone else, then I would agree with it :)

very true i agree with you totally:thumbsup:

I'd still be working hard on my marriage, if it wasn't for the abuse, violence and adultery (all on his part).

I made my vows for life, and I meant them for life too. It's a pity that he didn't mean them as much as I did really.

I'd still be working hard on my marriage, if it wasn't for the abuse, violence and adultery (all on his part).

I made my vows for life, and I meant them for life too. It's a pity that he didn't mean them as much as I did really.

If he's done that to you hun- he's a **** - sorry to be so rude.. but its very true, hope you dont mind of course :)

I'd think you were well within your rights to do a spot of cheating if it made you feel happier :thumbsup:

I'd think you were well within your rights to do a spot of cheating if it made you feel happier :thumbsup:

Nope- true to myself and my morals, so I couldn't do that. Didn't start dating again until I was sure he was gone and I was emotionally fit to do it, and met my DH through the forum.

I'm happy again now, and my morals are pretty strict, so I won't be shopping around for any more men.

I don't know what the future holds, and our relationship is still young, but it's shaping up very nicely to be a trusting and loving partnership thank you (I love you so much, if you read this hon).