Whether it's the film being utter tripe, or rude service, what's been your worst film-going experiences?

1) The floors near the tills at UGC being so sticky with Coke that (honestly) one of my shoes came off

2) A woman getting....friendly with a certain part of her other half...

3) Being told to stop dancing by a grumpy old man while watching 'S Club Seeing DOuble (we were on the back row!)

4) People smoking/shouting/using mobiles/throwing popcorn in general

Watching the first Lord of the Rings film. 3 hours plus of complete crap.

This brings back memories. About 20 years ago I took a girl to the pictures on a first date to see a film and in those days there used to be a short feature before the main film. The short turned out to be a film starring Leonard Rossiter about the French chap at the turn of the century who could fart on demand and became a star of the stage. I can laugh about it now but at the time we were both young, shy and embarrassed etc.
Still - we were together for 4 years and then she broke my heart, but that's another story.

I fell asleep the first time I went to see the original Return of the Jedi way back in 1983, but that was more due to tiredness than boredom or anything like that.

Watching a film called 'Down Periscope' a few years ago. Utter balls it was!

oh my god!!!! haha i saw down periscope too. lol. what a load of ****e.

"Queen of the Damned"

There is not one aspect of this film that was not the purest of garbage.

Originally posted by noseyrosie

3) Being told to stop dancing by a grumpy old man while watching 'S Club Seeing DOuble (we were on the back row!)



Having to tell people to stop dancing while I was watching the nubile SClub 7

MMMMMM SClub

Watching the first Lord of the Rings film at the Odeon in Doncaster (man, what a dump) and having the back of my seat kicked constantly for the three hours it was on. The little s#@t in question was sat in between his ignorant parents, who didnt tell him to stop once. I could have swung for him (and them) that day. Grrrrrrr!!!!

Originally posted by LittleWitch
Watching the first Lord of the Rings film at the Odeon in Doncaster (man, what a dump) and having the back of my seat kicked constantly for the three hours it was on. The little s#@t in question was sat in between his ignorant parents, who didnt tell him to stop once. I could have swung for him (and them) that day. Grrrrrrr!!!!

Every time that happens I stand up, turn round, and make a scene so the little $#&£ in question looks all embarrassed. If he's with a group of larger, scarier mates, however, this is not always a good thing!

Jurassic Park 3

"I believe i can call to the raptoras and get them to treat us as friends" *Man produces whistle that reminded me of the episode in 'The Fast Show' where the rambler gets chased by the country guy*

I was laughing to hide the tears, let me tell you.

Halfway through my maye got so annoyed he stood up and said "**** this, anybody fancy a pint?"

It is the only film i've ever walked out on.

Wilf

Originally posted by BrainThrust
Jurassic Park 3

"I believe i can call to the raptoras and get them to treat us as friends" *Man produces whistle that reminded me of the episode in 'The Fast Show' where the rambler gets chased by the country guy*

I was laughing to hide the tears, let me tell you.

Halfway through my maye got so annoyed he stood up and said "**** this, anybody fancy a pint?"

It is the only film i've ever walked out on.

Wilf


Question is, how many people came with you?

Well, all of our entire grouop (all 9 of us) but everyone else was just as disinterested, but most of them had their attention on who they had gone with really ;)

It ended up being a great night, we won the quiz, forgot we'd won a fair amount of money and decided to walk home taking 3 hours. It was brilliant.

Every cloud, as they say!

Wilf

Two experiences spring to mind.

The first was at the Odeon in town, the film (which I can't remember) was out of focus for half the film and we were not offerd any discount etc.

The second was at UGC but for the film I saw. A walk to remember. Oh yeah I remember it alright as a big pile of ****!! I was forced to see it with my friend when we could have seen something I wanted to (can't remmber also):loopy:

:P LOL @ Nosey Rosie! Your shoe came off! LOL.
Reminds me of a night out at the Leadmill.

No matter when i go to the cinema, i think the seat behind mine attracts the most annoying gits ever. I just turn around and look at them and it soon stops although i can feel the burning eyes in my neck afterwards.

If it starts again i get up and talk out loud embarrassing them, F*** em! I paid to watch the film not listen to them.

You should all start going to the Showroom. You don't get spotty irks in there.

You dont get good movies either.

Originally posted by Lestat
You dont get good movies either.

Maybe your cranium was jutting too low over your eyes the last time you passed the place and you didn't see the posters?

I saw the posters, most of the films are arty farty foreign films or 9 hour long epics which just dont suit my backside in the claustrophobic surroundings of the showroom.

Shame, in the past few months the place has had some of the best cinematic offerings going, such as:

A Mighty Wind: the latest comedy from the team behind "This is Spinal Tap"

Zaitoichi: cutting edge samurai flick by Beat Takeshi (imagine Kill Bill meets Crouching Tiger...)

Spirited Away: anime by Hayao Miyazaki, probably the greatest director to word in the animated medium today...his films are without effort everything that Disney should be but will never achieve

The Showroom has also had a good line in mainstream films as well, they showed the Lord of the Rings triology and usually have at least one of the better mainstream titles showing most weeks.

But perhaps the best selling point is that the place is mercifully free of chavar scum and their odious offspring.

:P LOL ok, ok, if it's it's free from Chavsters you've sold it to me.

I promise to go and check out whats on offer this week. ;)

There are no "chewie lewies" on the ceiling as well, that has to be worth the price of a ticket...and the bar's better, so no matter how bad the films are you just won't care!

I've got to admit though i really like UGC, the surroundings are nice and there is actually leg room in each cinema. The Full Monty screen is fantastic and thats how a film should REALLY be enjoyed.
I know you get Chavinders everywhere and fair point on some nights outside the UGC it can be like Chavsville. But on the whole UGC is a great cinema experience - plus you dont have to pay for parking either.

The UGC experience, if only the good could be seperated from the bad!

I was there two weeks ago to see the latest Harry Potter film and had the pleasure of a chav family in the back row who seemed to think the idea was to scream out a half-backed opinion on every scene or shot that made them jump:

"Ooh, that hippowhatsit made me **** myself."

"Really, I thought you put your elbow in a blob of ice cream."

These people should be beaten to death with their Burberry handbags or stoned with all the mobile phones they get through in a calendar year!

You've just ruined Harry Potter for me now!! I didn't know there was a Hippowhatsit in it!:mad:

It's hardly central to the plot!

Pointing out that Sirrius Black was framed and that the real villain is disguised as Ron's pet rat...now that would have really ruined the whole thing for you!

you evil person carmine, next you'll be revealing that eventually sirius black gets killed

Originally posted by CaptainSleep
you evil person carmine, next you'll be revealing that eventually sirius black gets killed

I'm a bad little boy...but my cheeky grin let's me get away with it!

I have a few experiences.

First one was at the odeon in town. It was quite a warm evening and the air conditioning in the cinema was broken so we sat for 2 hours with sweat pouring off us.

The others have been dreadful film experiences. First one was Mulholland Drive, god that was terrible. Second one was Lost in Translation. It was like one long Calvin Klein perfume advert. I had to walk out of that one I was so bored.

Being dragged to see Spirit - Stallion of the Simeron (fair enough I dragged mate to see Thunderpants... sort of a cultural exchange :P ) for those who dont know its a saccharine, gooey, cartoon about a horse and his oh so moving friendship with an Indian boy... through which my friend cried her eyes out... point out that she was 21 at the time!!!!!!!

Best movie experience was going to see Final Destination at UCI (remember that place?) we were the only two people in the screen, we made friends with the ticket seller dude... who was quite foxy ...and the projectionist guy kept making us jump with silly noises and I swear he did shadow puppets... film was absolute pants however :D

Originally posted by Mosherchik
Being dragged to see Spirit - Stallion of the Simeron (fair enough I dragged mate to see Thunderpants... sort of a cultural exchange :P ) for those who dont know its a saccharine, gooey, cartoon about a horse and his oh so moving friendship with an Indian boy... through which my friend cried her eyes out... point out that she was 21 at the time!!!!!!!

Best movie experience was going to see Final Destination at UCI (remember that place?) we were the only two people in the screen, we made friends with the ticket seller dude... who was quite foxy ...and the projectionist guy kept making us jump with silly noises and I swear he did shadow puppets... film was absolute pants however :D

Spirit: Stallion of the Cimmeron sucked IMHO.

All the way through the film I was wondering WTF is this thing actually ABOUT apart from talking horses?!

I wonder if the western world is still capable of producing decent commercial animation on any scale without the use of CGI...

Stick to the stuff coming out of Japan, it's better drawn, written and acted than anything Disney have done in the past thirty years!

just the Harry Potter films- they are the biggest pile of poop I've ever witnessed

I got to agree, the whole harry potter thing is such a hyped up pile of steaming horse manure.

Get real Harry, forget all those special effects and computer graphics - get a video of Paul Daniels and check out what real magic is!

Now thats magic, you'll like it - but not alot.

Originally posted by noseyrosie
2) A woman getting....friendly with a certain part of her other half...


Are you sure they weren't simply re-enacting "Down Periscope," Rosie?

We had this thread a while ago and I still maintain that the biggest cinematic waste of time ever was Moulin Rouge, closely followed by the Lord Of The Rings trilogy

wouldn't that make it "Up Periscope" :)

Originally posted by Cols
wouldn't that make it "Up Periscope" :)

In an ideal world, yes it would. But I can only work with the material I'm given :)

hehe once went to see terminator 3 wiv my bro n some mates - my bro had had a long day at work and feel asleep during the film. then started to quietly snore - but due to an action sequence i didnt notice. then the sequence ended and errr he carried on to snore louder, so the whole cinema could hear it - it was so funny. he woke up at the end clueless over it with many ppl lafing at him it was great.