hi my name is kendal im from manchester bury and i have just feel pregnant which i didnt plan for i was just woundering if any body anywhere had any baby things they were giving away anything would help
im off sick at the momment and have been for 8 weeks due to a cyst in my head i was booked in for an opp but found ou i was pregnant so i cudnt have it now owrk wont let me work
my mum isnt talking ot me which is so hard as i have looked to her for support im trying so hard to get buy but im struggling and in panic i have never been pregnant and im so scared
so please any body that has anything please please let me no
thankyou so much for readin this
kendal

Hi kendal...

I can't help you with the baby clothes, but I am a bit worried about YOU.

I'm assuming you're fairly young ~ forgive me if I'm wrong. Sorry for the following questions, but it will help to know. Is the baby's father still around? How far into your pregnancy are you, and how long is it since you told your mum?

You will get plenty of support on SF, but I think you need something nearer home. When you go for your next ante natal, ask if there are any support groups for young, single, expectant mothers in your area. Talking to people who are in a similar situation can help, and you can swap stories, and possibly help and support someone else who needs it.

Judging by the fact that you have posted more of less the same message in three separate sections of SF (that would usually be classed as spamming, but IMO this is an exception), it sounds like you're panicking. If you're in the very early stages of your pregnancy, it may be better to put off trying to get baby clothes for the time being.

I was a single mother, and when I first found out for sure that I was pregnant, I panicked, but I always knew I would love my son.

Please try to talk to your mum again ~ hopefully, she has calmed down somewhat, and may be more prepared to listen and support you.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

Ann

i live with the babies dady hes great for support, im 8 weeks and so scared and my mum dosnt want to talk to me i try every day she dosnt want to no me Hi kendal...

I can't help you with the baby clothes, but I am a bit worried about YOU.

I'm assuming you're fairly young ~ forgive me if I'm wrong. Sorry for the following questions, but it will help to know. Is the baby's father still around? How far into your pregnancy are you, and how long is it since you told your mum?

You will get plenty of support on SF, but I think you need something nearer home. When you go for your next ante natal, ask if there are any support groups for young, single, expectant mothers in your area. Talking to people who are in a similar situation can help, and you can swap stories, and possibly help and support someone else who needs it.

Judging by the fact that you have posted more of less the same message in three separate sections of SF (that would usually be classed as spamming, but IMO this is an exception), it sounds like you're panicking. If you're in the very early stages of your pregnancy, it may be better to put off trying to get baby clothes for the time being.

I was a single mother, and when I first found out for sure that I was pregnant, I panicked, but I always knew I would love my son.

Please try to talk to your mum again ~ hopefully, she has calmed down somewhat, and may be more prepared to listen and support you.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

Ann

i live with the babies dady hes great for support, im 8 weeks and so scared and my mum dosnt want to talk to me i try every day she dosnt want to no me
Hi Kendal :wave: .

I'm really sorry to hear that you're not getting on with your mum. She's probably just in shock at your news and hopefully she'll come round soon and start to get excited at the idea of being a Grandma.

I second everything that Ann said in her post above. You'll find lots of moral support on this forum. I know there are a few forumers who have recently had babies, or who are pregnant, so there will always be someone on here who will be able to answer questions.

But, you really do need to get some face-to-face advice closer to home. If you don't want to speak to your GP, could you talk to one of the practice nurses? I've never been pregnant, so I'm not sure how the system works, but I'm sure the people at your GP's surgery will have the names and phone numbers of various groups who you can talk to.

Sending you lots of good wishes :) .

Oh Kendal, I really feel for you. I'm happy though to hear that you have the support of your baby's daddy.

I know you want your mum's support right now, but I think it may take her a little while to get used to idea. Leave it for a few days, or even a week, and then try again. She may have calmed down by then.

As you are only 8 weeks into your pregnancy, even though I know this is easier said than done, try to put the pregnancy to the back of your mind for a couple of weeks, and start thinking about your health. Go and see your doctor, and find out what treatment you need for the cyst in your head. While you're at it, ask about the support groups.

It is still too early to think about getting baby clothes ~ it's best to leave thinking about that until after the first three or four months.

I wish I could be more help but, as you can see, I'm too far away, and I really think you want and need a hug. All I can offer is a cyber-hug....(((((((((kendal)))))))))

Oh Kendal, I really feel for you. I'm happy though to hear that you have the support of your baby's daddy.

I know you want your mum's support right now, but I think it may take her a little while to get used to idea. Leave it for a few days, or even a week, and then try again. She may have calmed down by then.

As you are only 8 weeks into your pregnancy, even though I know this is easier said than done, try to put the pregnancy to the back of your mind for a couple of weeks, and start thinking about your health. Go and see your doctor, and find out what treatment you need for the cyst in your head. While you're at it, ask about the support groups.

It is still too early to think about getting baby clothes ~ it's best to leave thinking about that until after the first three or four months.

I wish I could be more help but, as you can see, I'm too far away, and I really think you want and need a hug. All I can offer is a cyber-hug....(((((((((kendal)))))))))
just wanting to second everything said above really and to also give youa big hug ((((((((((((((((((((((kendal)))))))))))))))))))))) ))

see i need u ere lol
i get upport from baby dady but i need a female to talk to sometimes
my mum wont pull through i no she wont she didnt for my sister who feel pregnant young they havnt spoke for 3 yrs so i dont htink she will be up to the idea
the cyst in my head is nt a major thing it just gives me headaches and theres not much they can do while im pregnant
really hoping for a lil girl and martin my baby daddy wants a boy
to be honest i havnt got much support from family or friends but i have the support from baby daddy which is so importnat
and the thing with clothes i just wanna be prepared im so scared i wont be ready when it arrives just panicing
thanks for your support its needed
kendal xxOh Kendal, I really feel for you. I'm happy though to hear that you have the support of your baby's daddy.

I know you want your mum's support right now, but I think it may take her a little while to get used to idea. Leave it for a few days, or even a week, and then try again. She may have calmed down by then.

As you are only 8 weeks into your pregnancy, even though I know this is easier said than done, try to put the pregnancy to the back of your mind for a couple of weeks, and start thinking about your health. Go and see your doctor, and find out what treatment you need for the cyst in your head. While you're at it, ask about the support groups.

It is still too early to think about getting baby clothes ~ it's best to leave thinking about that until after the first three or four months.

I wish I could be more help but, as you can see, I'm too far away, and I really think you want and need a hug. All I can offer is a cyber-hug....(((((((((kendal)))))))))

just wanting to second everything said above really and to also give youa big hug ((((((((((((((((((((((kendal)))))))))))))))))))))) ))
thankyou i appreciate it

Im sorry that things seem so bleak but being pregnant is lovely. Nineteen is not that young to have a baby.

Are you able to cope financially?

My husband's parents live in Bury so if you would like to meet up and have a chat anytime just give me a shout.

Having a baby is an incredibly life changing thing but I'm sure these things will sort themselves out.

Pm me if you want to meet up or have a chat.
lots of love
OllieK

Hi K,

Please don't fret about such things as baby clothes this early. The only thing that you need to worry about right now is your health and that of your baby's. Don't worry about being freaked out either. I was 31 when I found out and it freaked me out too!!! Pregnancy does pass slowly (well it did for me) and so you have plenty of time to prepare for the arrival. I didn't buy a thing until a couple of weeks before mine was due. You really do not need as much as you think. Just get some basics a little nearer the time of the birth and then you can buy the rest as you decide you need it. It really does not have to be such a stressful thing. I wanted a girl too. At 20 weeks I found out I was having a boy. I was disappointed. Got used to the idea. When Luke was born it was love at first sight and now I can not imagine having anyone else as my child. Ensure your life is serene for the next 7 months. Look after yourself, particularly in the early weeks. Eat well. Rest well. If I may ask a personal question....was your Mother young when she had her children? Perhaps she struggled and this is bringing it all back to her. Maybe that is why she says she does not want to know. There is much support out there.

Hi K, so sorry to hear about your predicament. I live in Bury but I’m old and a widower. However, if you really need to talk to a female I have a family friend who I feel sure you could talk to in confidence. Obviously I’d have to ask her first, but PM me any time you feel the need and I’ll ask her.

Don’t worry about the baby’s clothes. There are organisations in Bury that can help. Ask your G.P. In any event, if things haven’t gone right within the next few months, and you’re struggling for cash, PM me, tell me your circumstances and I’ll more than likely help you out — depending on those circumstances. You won’t need to come to see me, I’ll come to see you.

Best wishes to you both, and to the new arrival you’re bringing into the world. peterw

i really thankyou all so much for ur support i have a few numbers from just to ring you up and chat which i think is so kind
also many people have offered to send me things in the post as i live quiet far away
i really appreciate all your help thankyou so much k

some one has offered me a new born start kit so that the baby has an out fit for when its born how sweet
your all so nice i also have a baby bath and other things coming from a lady in kent who is posting it to me
i really thankyou all so much everything is putting my mind at rest if any1 has anything else that can post it to me plez plez let me no i thankyou all so much for your offers

hi, really sorry to hear that! my heart really does go out to ya..

it is early days though and ya never know.. ya mum may come round when she gets used to the idea a bit.. i was in a similar situation with my parents (and most of my family tbh) when i got pregnant at 16.. and although my gran in particular didnt speak to me for a very long time.. as soon as my little girl was born.. she was so happy and now cant go more than a couple of days without seeing her!

i have loads of clothes, a buggy, sterilising stuff, blankets, baby bath... and loads of other stuff.. most of which other people gave me (and most of which i never used) so dont want anything for them if you need stuff further down the line....

if ya need anyone to talk to (although i am away for the next week) i am usually around and have all summer free now until uni starts so just give me a shout and will do what i can..

however.... i also dont think that worrying about baby stuff is your biggest concern at the moment.. there will be chance to sort all that out much later on. at the moment you need to take time to sort yourself out and relax a little. worrying wont do you or the baby any good in the long run. perhaps try finding out about councelling sorta things in your area.. although it didnt help me at all when i was referred to one, it does help a lot of people.

anyways, let me know if you wanna chat or need ought..

take care of ya'self XXX

thankyou so much
i no baby stuff isnt the best thing at the momment but the more im prepeared the beta i can calm down then and relax but i cant as im worried for the childs up bringing
if u have any baby things that you dont mind sending me please please pm me i would really appreciate anything you can send and i will deffintly be talk to you so much more i always need advice
thnakyou k hi, really sorry to hear that! my heart really does go out to ya..

it is early days though and ya never know.. ya mum may come round when she gets used to the idea a bit.. i was in a similar situation with my parents (and most of my family tbh) when i got pregnant at 16.. and although my gran in particular didnt speak to me for a very long time.. as soon as my little girl was born.. she was so happy and now cant go more than a couple of days without seeing her!

i have loads of clothes, a buggy, sterilising stuff, blankets, baby bath... and loads of other stuff.. most of which other people gave me (and most of which i never used) so dont want anything for them if you need stuff further down the line....

if ya need anyone to talk to (although i am away for the next week) i am usually around and have all summer free now until uni starts so just give me a shout and will do what i can..

however.... i also dont think that worrying about baby stuff is your biggest concern at the moment.. there will be chance to sort all that out much later on. at the moment you need to take time to sort yourself out and relax a little. worrying wont do you or the baby any good in the long run. perhaps try finding out about councelling sorta things in your area.. although it didnt help me at all when i was referred to one, it does help a lot of people.

anyways, let me know if you wanna chat or need ought..

take care of ya'self XXX

sending ya a pm X

thanks hun appreciate it so much its amazing to see how many people care

You could try here http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Sheffield-FreeCycle/messages people are always giving things away.
My only advice is 'ask politely', many people, including myself when I give things away, are easily offended when you get a rude e-mail demanding something you have offered.
If you explain a little of your situation in your replies for items, people will often suddenly find extra things to give you if you're lucky.
Good luck!
PS, My mother and I hadn't been talking for over a year when i got pregnant. Once I told her she started chilling out a little and now we get on. Your Mum might or might not but look forward to the good stuff and don't focus on the bad.

thankyou all so much for helping and giving me the advice i need

i just wanna thank evey 1 for there support i have recieved some lovely baby clothes today from a lady called tami so thanks for that
if any1 else has anything they can give away please please pm me

Hi Kendal,

I'm in Manchester. I'll see if we have some things that our little 'un doesn't need and get back to you.

that would be great do u have msn Hi Kendal,

I'm in Manchester. I'll see if we have some things that our little 'un doesn't need and get back to you.

errrrrmmmmmm

im from manchester bury and i have just feel pregnant which i didnt plan for i was just woundering if any body anywhere had any baby things they were giving away anything would help
im off sick at the momment and have been for 8 weeks due to a cyst in my head i was booked in for an opp but found ou i was pregnant so i cudnt have it now owrk wont let me work
my mum isnt talking ot me which is so hard as i have looked to her for support im trying so hard to get buy but im struggling and in panic i have never been pregnant and im so scared
so please any body that has anything please please let me no
thankyou so much for readin this
kendal

Hi, I am so sorry that you are feeling this way just now,

It looks like you have found some support - i really do think that you will be fine and though its easy for me to say not to worry, i know that pregnancy and the hormones that it stirs up can give us all sorts of insecurities.

Your mum - you are 19 years old and an adult, this is your life and whatever it is that you mum might not like - well what can she do? You are going to have this baby and even with your health matters you will cope and you will be alright - in 7 months you will have a new baby, you have a caring partner to help you along - your mum is more than likely just very concerned for you but might not be able to show it in a way that feel supportive - i know that if i had a child your age in your situation i would worry too - maybe i time your mum will be able to offer you some support - she is going to be a granny, nothing like a new baby to soften mothers up.

Yoy need to look on www.freecycle.org - if this link fails just google Freecycle, they have a huge group in Manchester although when i tried to join that group recently i was refused - there is an Oldham group and Rochdale Group also. You can pick up allsorts of stuff on Freecycle all free of charge - if you join you need to apply and basically all you need to say in the application is that you are keen to save unwanted items from going to landfill - this should get you approved. There is always baby clothes and stuff being offered, all you might have to do is go and collect stuff but you have lots of time to be prepared.

When you have the baby you don't need to have anything fancy - i didn't for any of mine, and you don't need half as much stuff as you think you do, one thing that i know you can save money on is baby wipes - these things cost a fortune - if you have any old towels - you could ask for them on freecycle - simply chop them into neat squares, have one lot for babies body and one lot for nappy changes - simply wash them after use and reuse - you can store so many in a plastic ice cream tub with a little water, this way you can reduce the amounht you spend on cotto wool which, you would only need to use on babies face whilst he/she is tiny.

I have so many tips for you to help you economise but now is too early and you have enough to think about just now but babies really do not need to be as expensive as most people make them.

I actually have a pushchair which, is suitable from birth - it's a Mammas and Pappas, needs a good wash but is essentially in good repair - now i can't afford to post it to Bury but i am not a million miles away from you so if you have someone who could drive you i could maybe meet you somewhere off the M60 - PM me if you are interested.

Take care.

babs

hi ive got loads of baby stuff for sale on one of my threads, from pushchairs to clothes to baby bath etc pm me and ill price stuff up for you.

if you need to talk send me a pm because i know how it feels to have family that dont talk to you because you have had or in your case having a baby. ive been there.

i think this baby will be about 2 now!!

ha ha i dint read the date of it ha ha sorry

i think this baby will be about 2 now!!

If it ever actually existed...

thats a bit harsh lol

ha ha i dint read the date of it ha ha sorry

no, but the thought was there, and it was kind of you to think of this young lass who was apparently "in trouble" and had no support from her family.

i know what its like, jsut because your young and no family, where you live no one helps you because they think bad stuff about you i know how she feels everyone has done it to me.

Mod: Nice thought rotherhamgir, but I've closed the thread now as its so old.