*If Geoff or any of the mods deem this thread to be going into the realms of depravity, then feel free to remove.

I've just received my new copy of the complete revised edition of Roger's Profanisaurus (VIZ) and it's creasing me up with laughter.
I'll keep them as clean as possible, but I wanted to give you an example of some of the stuff thats in it.

Mumrar
The act of sneaking up behind your mother and shouting RAR!

Gash Card
A female only method of payment for goods and services. Accepted by taxi drivers, milkmen and pizza delivery boys.

G-Rope
G-String for the fuller figured female

*The above are for humour purposes only and do NOT reflect the opinions of the site owners or any of it's staff. They are not intended to offend.

<smirk> :lol:

Not seen a Viz for ages.

Fat Slags and Buster Gonad used to be the tops, are they still in it?

Originally posted by "mikey"

Not seen a Viz for ages.

Fat Slags and Buster Gonad used to be the tops, are they still in it?
Fat ***** are but haven'tseen Buster for a while. Still got Biffa Bacon tho! :lol:
Want some more of the Profanisaurus?

Roger Mellie (the Man on the Telly)'s my favourite :lol:

Originally posted by "Tony Ruscoe"

Roger Mellie (the Man on the Telly)'s my favourite :lol:
Then you may have some more. *The same disclaimers still count as the original post.[/siz]

Mr. Bond
A particularly buoyant poo that returns to the surface of the water even after flushing. 'Ah, so we meet again Mr. Bond'

I think you're getting close to the "censor-line" now :wink:

Originally posted by "Tony Ruscoe"

I think you're getting close to the "censor-line" now :wink:
I will make sure that I don't cross it in that case.

Hi Geoff how are you :wink:

Don't be so rude you nasty man, you should be ashamed of yourself, how dare you speak about the Ladies in such a way, go and stand in a corner or get behind the blackboard where we can not see you. DISGRACEFULL!!!

Originally posted by "halevan"

Don't be so rude you nasty man, you should be ashamed of yourself, how dare you speak about the Ladies in such a way, go and stand in a corner or get behind the blackboard where we can not see you. DISGRACEFULL!!!
OK OK, they're gone. A simple request works better than an outright slagging off!
I don't mind removing what people deem to be unwanted on the boards.

:lol: HAHAHHAHA

DaBouncer....... more please. Shame some people r so touchy, better stick to the less offensive ones, but still funny :lol:

Originally posted by "t020"

:lol: HAHAHHAHA

DaBouncer....... more please. Shame some people r so touchy, better stick to the less offensive ones, but still funny :lol:
I shall find some more for you today!
I'll make sure they stay this side of the line! :wink:

My favourite was a 'Barnes Wallace' - when you go for a poo & the resultant plume of ice cold water kisses your anus :hihi:

My favourite was a 'Barnes Wallace' - when you go for a poo & the resultant plume of ice cold water kisses your anus :hihi:

Hit this through the 'other thread' but had seen it before and ya gave me a laughing fit, still can't type so well, keys look blurred and fingers hitting three or four of them as whole body bounces up and down.

................and its only funny because we've all been there done that:D

The funniest one I saw in the Viz Profanesaurus was "Barny Rubble - The bricks and paving slabs thrown during street battles"

My favourite ever was:

CLOWN CAR: Placing 'Johnson and the boys' into a woman's mouth causing steam to come out of her nose and her ears to fall off.

babber v.
A term popular in the delightful South Yorkshire hamlet of Barnsley and its environs, meaning to defecate oneself involuntarily.
To papper.

'Ayup, why's Dickie in his football shorts, Brian?' 'He babbered hissen, Geoffrey.'

faux parp n.
The passing of gas in a sophisticated social setting.
'I'll never forget the first time I had to serve Her Majesty with a cup of tea in her Balmoral quarters. I was so nervous that I committed an horrendous faux parp while I was bending over her bed to get the bag out the cup and she nearly spewed.'
(from She Told Me I Could Have Them Dresses, Honest - The Memoirs of a Royal Butler by Paul Burrell).

http://www.viz.co.uk/profanisaurus/profan_front_index.php

The online version

This is one of my favourite reads. I remember discovering it many many years ago. The hours of laughter.

I remember the thieving gypsey ********, it was so un pc it got pulled after a fortnight or so!!:hihi:

I like the Mr Bond one, i can foresee much future usage of it (the expression)

I remember the thieving gypsey ********, it was so un pc it got pulled after a fortnight or so!!:hihi:

I still have this issue! It also has a strip called " The Good Honest gypsies"

The next issue has an apology, with the words Thieving Gypsy ******** repeated over and over again. Pretty funny - I don't think the Viz would do this today, although they are the only media outlet to ever make jokes about 9/11.

This is a corker!:

Kate Nash n. rhym. slang.
Gash, named after the Happy Shopper Lily Allen singer-songwriter. 'Get your Y-fronts off, Germaine, and I'll get a shot of your Kate Nash.'

my favourite is black bag the faith full border bin liner;)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Bag

Off the top of my head;
Gassius Clay - a plop that stings like a bee on the way out, then floats like a butterfly once int bowl.

Classy.

http://www.viz.co.uk/profanisaurus/profan_front_index.php

The online version

"glaze a knuckle"

LOL