Ok, serious topic so lets have some serious replies please.

It seems that in this age of Political Correectness it is not generally acceptable to make fun of various different groups be they black, gay whatever. Ok fair enough, but it seems there is still one group whom it is still perfectly acceptable to poke fun at; the so called 'sad' men.

It seems taht any man who has trouble finding a girlfriend is somehow fair game for any ridicule and abuse that people wish to hurl his way. Is it not about time we extended political correctness to cover this group who (I believe) so often get a pretty raw deal from society.

How can we assist you slimsid........by that I mean, what do you suggest in the way of "political correctness" terms for these people.............?

what do you suggest in the way of "political correctness" terms for these people.............?Surely virgin is acceptable?

Unfortunately, I think the word sadism has already been taken....

It's a general thing. It seems that men who can't find a girlfriend are seen as a legitimate target while other groups (black, gay etc) are not. Why?

Personally, it's perhaps my age coming in on this one, I don't think anyone I know has ever referred to any bloke as a "sad" man, or offered up remarks about any single bloke..............

I must have led a sheltered life:|

It's a general thing. It seems that men who can't find a girlfriend are seen as a legitimate target while other groups (black, gay etc) are not. Why?

nothing constructive to add, just wanted to say that i read this as "men who can't afford a girlfriend".

actually, second thoughts, I do have something to add - there are many groups of society that it's deemed acceptable to rip the **** out of - posh people, unmarried old women who keep cats, chavs, students...why pick out single white men as any particular cause to get riled up about? it seems to me that there are many more causes out there (lack of funding for malaria/hiv/tb research, poverty, drought, mistreatment of women and children, torture, land disputes, civil war, animal extinction, global warming/dimming, terrorism blah blah blah) to care about than offending middle aged white men who have no girlfriend.

It's a general thing. It seems that men who can't find a girlfriend are seen as a legitimate target while other groups (black, gay etc) are not. Why?

I take it your having problems finding a g/f and your mates are picking on you ?, or am I reading this wrong.

I don`t have a g/f and no picks on me, but then I don`t want one, or are you saying cause I don`t have a b/f they should pick on me.

It's a general thing. It seems that men who can't find a girlfriend are seen as a legitimate target while other groups (black, gay etc) are not. Why?

So black and gay is legitimate :loopy:

Yep i always say Virgins get wound up, fact of life which everyone has had at some time or another unless you lost it at 12 :D

But some bring it on themsleves like you do Sid :D

nothing constructive to add, just wanted to say that i read this as "men who can't afford a girlfriend".

actually, second thoughts, I do have something to add - there are many groups of society that it's deemed acceptable to rip the **** out of - posh people, unmarried old women who keep cats, chavs, students...why pick out single white men as any particular cause to get riled up about? it seems to me that there are many more causes out there (lack of funding for malaria/hiv/tb research, poverty, drought, mistreatment of women and children, torture, land disputes, civil war, animal extinction, global warming/dimming, terrorism blah blah blah) to care about than offending middle aged white men who have no girlfriend.
i agree-in fact i think that most 'types' of people are fair game to ridicule,and that only a few are seen as too sensitive,ie are privvy to the pc brigade?

I've never ridiculed anyone for not having a girlfriend nor has anyone I've known... are you sure this actually happens? On the other hand if it's something someone's really trying to do and they can't manage it, they might be ridiculed for failing by the less sympathetic among us, but then this could apply to anything and isn't necessarily limited to girlfriend acquisition (which is overrated anyway).

I know what you mean Slim Sid and at the risk of being controversial can I say I don’t think it is you fault.

Let me give you an example.

It’s a few years ago now but I was listening to a radio program and a very well known pop star was talking very candidly about her life. She said that as far as she was concerned there were two types of men. There were the macho types who would drive up in their impressive cars, they would tell her to jump in and then they would take her to a night club or a posh restaurant, and she loved it.

Then there was the other type of man, who would also call for her and and they would say to her, “what would you like to do tonight?”

She thought they were wimps.

She married a macho man and her life was hell because he was only interested in himself and what he wanted to do and as far as he was concerned she was an accessory. They divorced and she married another man who was a similar type of person.

Again the same, and they divorced.

Finally she married the considerate type who she had always thought of as being wimps. They respect each other, they consider each others needs and they are very happy.

She was going through a learning curve. She is now happily married, but she ruined two men’s lives while she was finding herself. And they say women are more mature than men, don’t believe it. Most of them are little girls at heart and if they reject you then it is their loss. And you are better off financially without them.

She ruined two mens lives? By the sounds of it they'd just be disappointed that their accessory had split.

Going back to the OP.
Who told you that it's not acceptable to make fun of gay people or colour people sid?
The level of acceptableness (is that a word) is in my experience the same for making fun of any group.
It's not acceptable if you are being singled out and ridiculed, that's bullying, it is acceptable if a comedian makes a joke about a particular group.

You probably just notice anything about single men more because you're obsessed with finding a girlfriend and not obsessed with being gay or black.

It seems that men who can't find a girlfriend are seen as a legitimate target Why?

If you set yourself up as a target, ye olde law of the jungle suggests that you're going to get shot at. Walk around with 'Victim' written across your forehead and the chances are, someone will come along and give you a good kicking. Simple really. If you can't take the flack, stop banging on about it.

She ruined two mens lives? By the sounds of it they'd just be disappointed that their accessory had split.



Have you never been divorced Cyclone?

There is maintenance to consider, the loss of your home, and the children to think about for starters. Believe me divorce isn’t to be dismissed as easily as that, it can ruin your life, although some may be lucky.

it is acceptable if a comedian makes a joke about a particular group.



No it is not.

it is to me.

Have you never been divorced Cyclone?

There is maintenance to consider, the loss of your home, and the children to consider for starters. Believe me divorce isn’t to be dismissed as easily as that, it can ruin your life although some are lucky.

maybe the men should have thought of that before marrying her then?

And no, i haven't been married, so i also haven't been divorced.

it is to me.

Try making a joke about Muslims and see what happens.

nothing happened. what were you expecting?

Slimsid, it seems that you are constantly referring to having a lack of a girlfriend and most if not 99% of your threads are somehow related to this subject. If you haven't noticed, people on here get ridiculed for the smallest things and so therefore you are putting yourself in it.

To be honest you need other tatics for gaining a gf but I was impressed to see you went speed dating. I think you should avoid using the internet for this matter as it sounds like you can be easily led.

Slimsid, it seems that you are constantly referring to having a lack of a girlfriend and most if not 99% of your threads are somehow related to this subject. If you haven't noticed, people on here get ridiculed for the smallest things and so therefore you are putting yourself in it.

To be honest you need other tatics for gaining a gf but I was impressed to see you went speed dating. I think you should avoid using the internet for this matter as it sounds like you can be easily led.

slimsid.....I was going to resist this, and I have to the depth of my being. I can stand it no longer, it has to be said.........Why not pick a lady who can run slower than you...........:o What have I said :)

it is acceptable if a comedian makes a joke about a particular group.

People or groups of people can become upset if you make jokes about them and I notice on the forum a very strong element of taking people down, making derogatory remarks, sometimes insulting people, sometimes a joke can be taken the wrong way, often people ignore what they perceive to be an insult, while others, perhaps rightly retaliate in some way.

I don't like this attitude of bringing people down and making them look small or stupid and that is what many of these jokes do. Think about those jokes about the Irish, Scots, English and I could go on, but they make the object of the joke look small.

Instead of this, why can't we show proper respect for people?

it is to me.

I agree with Grahame,
I once found myself working at a venue where Jimmy Carol from radio sheffield was employed to be the entertainer. I had never heard of him before but was assured that he was an excellent and funny man.

Well after five minutes It was clear to me that all of his material was based around taking the pee out of anyone and everyone he could. He even took the pee out of the people in front of him. That kind of thing might have made my grandad laugh, but take away the insults, and the entertainment was very sparse.

I am not going to go into the kind of things which were said as I feel it would be a step too far. But I wonder why a man like that would want to ever get up in the morning. I was totally and utterly embarrased to be there.

When he finished, he got his money and was off like a streak of greased lightning. I'm not surprised!
I would have had more respect for him if he would have stayed for 20 minutes and allowed people to come and say hello to him, then he would have had to look all these people in the eye on their own terms.

snip
I don't like this attitude of bringing people down and making them look small or stupid
Instead of this, why can't we show propper respect for people?

showing respect for people like this you mean Grahame?

And they say women are more mature than men, don’t believe it. Most of them are little girls at heart

do you see what you did there?

Although I do agree with your point about trying to make people look small ... for instance, people who can't spell having goes at other people who can't spell - oh! the irony.

As for Slimsid, when has anyone ever called him sad on SF? A little teasing sometimes at one of the endless threads about getting a girlfriend. Maybe you should go to one of the many different types of meets set up by people on the Forum, other people have paired up due to meets, it could happen to you too :)

showing respect for people like this you mean Grahame?

Sorry rubydazzler. It was very naughty of me to say that. I have often heard women say that men are immature and I think the lady I was talking about was a little immature at the time she got married, I think she was quite young first time round. So there we are, I'm sorry.

Sorry rubydazzler. It was very naughty of me to say that. I have often heard women say that men are immature and I think the lady I was talking about was a little immature at the time she got married, I think she was quite young when she married. So there we are, will forgive me please?
Naughty, naughty Grahame................you got carried away for a moment and got fingered......:hihi:

My wife was 20 when we got married........she's still 20 to me, but she gets very annoyed if I say that.......I wonder why after 41 years. :confused:

Could it be she has always been the one with the sense in our relationship.:hihi:

Naughty, naughty Grahame................you got carried away for a moment and got fingered......:hihi:

My wife was 20 when we got married........she's still 20 to me, but she gets very annoyed if I say that.......I wonder why after 41 years. :confused:

Could it be she has always been the one with the sense in our relationship.:hihi:

And I bet she is lovely. Mind you, with you around someone needs to have the sense in the family. :D

And I bet she is lovely.

Wouldn't swap her for a million quid. The reverse of that is she'd swap me for a tenner, a fiver at a push...........:hihi: :hihi: :hihi:

Now, now boys ... keep on the topic ... :D

You dont have to apologise to me anyway Grahame, lol I was just pointing out a little inconsistency in your train of thought :P

I bet you all wish I'd never started posting again now - I have six months worth of pent up postings to get rid off though, sowwy .... :hihi:

Let me see if i've got this right - you are saying that any man who has trouble getting a girlfriend is labelled a 'sad man' and is then ridiculed as such?

What about the women who have trouble getting a boyfriend? Loads of groups and individuals in society get ridiculed so I think i've missed the point somewhere.

Graeme, you talk about a woman who has had two failed marriages behind her as if she forced the two men to marry her and then divorced them on a whim, are you really saying these two blokes were totally unable to make the decision themselves whether to marry or not? Or that they were divorced for no reason? It takes two in every relationship, if the woman was very young was she not the one to be taken advantage of?

It really is about time people took responsibility for their own actions and stopped looking to blame someone/everyone else.

It really is about time people took responsibility for their own actions and stopped looking to blame someone/everyone else.

TOTALLY agreed with you Hels! :thumbsup:

I agree I wouldnt label people sad just because they dont have a partner, although there may be some reasons why they dont have one.. maybe they are too afraid to make the moves to attract the opposite sex?

Ok, serious topic so lets have some serious replies please.

It seems that in this age of Political Correectness it is not generally acceptable to make fun of various different groups be they black, gay whatever. Ok fair enough, but it seems there is still one group whom it is still perfectly acceptable to poke fun at; the so called 'sad' men.

It seems taht any man who has trouble finding a girlfriend is somehow fair game for any ridicule and abuse that people wish to hurl his way. Is it not about time we extended political correctness to cover this group who (I believe) so often get a pretty raw deal from society.

Slimsid the only time anyone has a poke at you is when you ask them to do it.

If you grew up a bit and started acting like a man then people might take you more seriously.... you are in your 30's and I swear I could be reading the post of a frustrated teenager.

Women will find you a big turn off in your present form.... re-invent yourself into a mature adult and stop blaming others for your own inadequicies. :)

nothing constructive to add, just wanted to say that i read this as "men who can't afford a girlfriend".

actually, second thoughts, I do have something to add - there are many groups of society that it's deemed acceptable to rip the **** out of - posh people, unmarried old women who keep cats, chavs, students...why pick out single white men as any particular cause to get riled up about? it seems to me that there are many more causes out there (lack of funding for malaria/hiv/tb research, poverty, drought, mistreatment of women and children, torture, land disputes, civil war, animal extinction, global warming/dimming, terrorism blah blah blah) to care about than offending middle aged white men who have no girlfriend.

:thumbsup: :thumbsup:

So black and gay is legitimate :loopy:

Yep i always say Virgins get wound up, fact of life which everyone has had at some time or another unless you lost it at 12 :D

But some bring it on themsleves like you do Sid :D

I don't think that was what he was saying. At least I hope not or he would be sad!

Now, now boys ... keep on the topic ... :D

You dont have to apologise to me anyway Grahame, lol I was just pointing out a little inconsistency in your train of thought :P

I bet you all wish I'd never started posting again now - I have six months worth of pent up postings to get rid off though, sowwy .... :hihi:

Hows about getting it of your chest rubydazzler :) I like a good debate. :D

Sorry rubydazzler. It was very naughty of me to say that. I have often heard women say that men are immature and I think the lady I was talking about was a little immature at the time she got married, I think she was quite young first time round. So there we are, I'm sorry.

Don't you think the two men she married first off were more immature though? Only interested in themselves and seeing a woman as an 'accessory'?!? I don't think that's half as forgivable as a young woman making a mistake by marrying this kind of man.

I think we've completely left the original topic.
Sid's point was that sad men are the only acceptable target for making fun off.
Acceptable depends on the context, but 'sad' men are no more or less acceptable than most other groups. Whether each of us thinks that jokes are or aren't acceptable is a personal thing, and not really relevant.

So there's no reason for the mystical PC Brigade to rush to the defence of sad men, anymore than they rush to the defence of any other group.
Maybe the PC Brigade are like team america?

I think the probem here is that Slim thinks because he cant get a girlfriend he is considered a sad man by his peers (or us) - where really he cant get a girlfriend because he is a sad man.

How many thousand posts have you made slim where you have been given genuine advice to help, which any sane person would agree to - that you just ignore. You are a sad man, and you bring it upon yourself - but not because you cant get a woman.

Try making a joke about Muslims and see what happens.

i think most comedy nights i have been to include jokes about muslims, americans, jews, british, french or whatever. And these may have been by muslim or americam comedians for example.

so i dont find this a problem as its comedy, so what do you mean? what will happen?

It really is about time people took responsibility for their own actions and stopped looking to blame someone/everyone else.

Very well said, Hels. You're spot-on.

StarSparkle

I think the probem here is that Slim thinks because he cant get a girlfriend he is considered a sad man by his peers (or us) - where really he cant get a girlfriend because he is a sad man.

How many thousand posts have you made slim where you have been given genuine advice to help, which any sane person would agree to - that you just ignore. You are a sad man, and you bring it upon yourself - but not because you cant get a woman.

You have to be cruel to be kind. :hihi: :hihi: :hihi:

Look, if a bloke can't get a girlfriend, then there's a reason they can't. I think people take the **** out of the reason more than the fact they don't have a girlfriend.

Besides, political correctness is getting out of hand. We don't need to be restricted in what we say and how we think.

If you can't laugh at yourself once in a while, then that's a problem in itself I think.

^
I can't say **** on here? Come on, it's not even swearing!

It seems that in this age of Political Correectness it is not generally acceptable to make fun of various different groups

Not in my book, everyone is fair game.

actually, second thoughts, I do have something to add - there are many groups of society that it's deemed acceptable to rip the **** out of - posh people, unmarried old women who keep cats, chavs, students...why pick out single white men as any particular cause to get riled up about? it seems to me that there are many more causes out there (lack of funding for malaria/hiv/tb research, poverty, drought, mistreatment of women and children, torture, land disputes, civil war, animal extinction, global warming/dimming, terrorism blah blah blah) to care about than offending middle aged white men who have no girlfriend.

Firstly I never said anything about being middle aged or white that was your assumption and this is exactly the sort of thing I meant. You seem to me (I could be wrong) like a typical PC person who has loads of sympathy for a wide variety of groups yet anyone who is male, white and (maybe) middleaged is not really worthy of such understanding.

If i may be permitted just a very quick point about my own situation to clear up any misunderstanding. There is nothing intrinsically wrong with me. My limited social and conversational skills are due purley to lack of ample opportunities to put them into practice and thus a vicious circle exists. If only a girl (who i fancy - that is important-) would be prepared to give me a chance (only the same chance as they would other men mind - I'm not asking for special privilages) then I would (over time) become just as socailly accumplished as the rest of you.

Slim, you are one of the mosts well known posters on the Forum. But you send out such mixed messgaes. You say you have limited social and conversational skills but refuse to attend a meet etc.

Why does it have to be a girlto bring you out of a shell. Any good mate (non gay way BTW :D) will be as good for your social skills as anyone.

Slim, you are one of the mosts well known posters on the Forum. But you send out such mixed messgaes. You say you have limited social and conversational skills but refuse to attend a meet etc.

Why does it have to be a girlto bring you out of a shell. Any good mate (non gay way BTW :D) will be as good for your social skills as anyone.

Sure point taken but I would really like to have a girlfriend which doesn't seem unreasonable. Anyway, there are certain social skills which are only really appropriate for a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship.

you add the rider (who I fancy), but from previous discussions it would appear that you have set very high standards.

And you don't seem to accept that you are a part of the problem and thus can be part of the solution. It doesn't need a stunning looking girl to take pity on you, it needs you to take some responibility for your own development and be realistic about who is likely to be attracted to you.

Get yourself to one of the meets and enjoy the social interaction. Don't hide behind the patently false idea (in this case) that it's dangerous to meet people who you've only met on the internet. It's no more dangerous than meeting any other stranger.

Sure point taken but I would really like to have a girlfriend which doesn't seem unreasonable. Anyway, there are certain social skills which are only really appropriate for a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship.

I would worry that if you was to date a girl i knew that you would smother the life out of her. (i'm not being funny here BTW)

And apart from the sex, and the other obvious stuff social skills apply to others as well. I dont know how many good friends you have Sid but you shoudl focus on that. Getting out and about is essential.

[QUOTE=Cyclone]you add the rider (who I fancy), but from previous discussions it would appear that you have set very high standards.

QUOTE]

Actually my standards are no higher than those of the vast majority of men. I don't expect a supermodel or anyone like that but would be quite happy with any reasonably good looking girl. No i don't want someone who I find really unattractive but then who would. I'm not asking for any more than the vast majority of men.

[QUOTE=Cyclone]you add the rider (who I fancy), but from previous discussions it would appear that you have set very high standards.

QUOTE]

Actually my standards are no higher than those of the vast majority of men. I don't expect a supermodel or anyone like that but would be quite happy with any reasonably good looking girl. No i don't want someone who I find really unattractive but then who would. I'm not asking for any more than the vast majority of men.

No prolems with having standards Slimsid but you are basing experience on the very little you have (which you admit to). This will change when you begin to meet women mate :thumbsup:

Slim, do you go to sauna's?

i think u need to take stock of ur situation and really think long and hard about the sort of women u could possibly go for. you are in ur early thirties- therefore go for women aged between 23 approx and 35 lets say. Slim- i know who ur and after reading ur post i do feel like u need some practical advice not just ppl slatin u. instead of saying how u want a 'reasonable looking woman'' try going to lots of different bars/ pubs and alos joing the gym etc or clubs pr niteschool etc.
u meet ppl in all situations/ places!!! i met my ex on holiday in newquay in a bar- at first i didnt fancy him - but he had a WICKED personality and i soon fell in love with that!! give it time. u arent in THAT bad a situation for freaks sake!!! GOOD LUCK

Slim, do you go to sauna's?

He uses his blue peter badge to get in for free?:hihi:

There was a thousand page thread giving out useful practical advice, all of which was carefully ignored.

i think u need to take stock of ur situation and really think long and hard about the sort of women u could possibly go for. you are in ur early thirties- therefore go for women aged between 23 approx and 35 lets say. Slim- i know who ur and after reading ur post i do feel like u need some practical advice not just ppl slatin u. instead of saying how u want a 'reasonable looking woman'' try going to lots of different bars/ pubs and alos joing the gym etc or clubs pr niteschool etc.
u meet ppl in all situations/ places!!! i met my ex on holiday in newquay in a bar- at first i didnt fancy him - but he had a WICKED personality and i soon fell in love with that!! give it time. u arent in THAT bad a situation for freaks sake!!! GOOD LUCK

Thanks. I'm glad you think I am not in that bad a situation. True looks aren't everything and maybe you are right I will have to rely on my personality rather than stunning good looks. The problem is I don't have a great personality either.

The one thing I know I definately have in my favour is that I never get disheartened (well almost never) and don't give up easily. I know you know what i look like - would you say i was really bad looking?

Slim, do you go to sauna's?

Well actually ....... NO!

Neither do i go trainspotting, make model airplains or spend my time as a Jahovas Winess going fro door to door. Or a thousand other things people might imagian.

napoleon dynamite.

u are not ugly at all! believe me there are sooo many ppl in ur situation- and it just goes to show how difficult it can be meeting sum1 but isnt it better to not be with any one than to be with sum1 who is either a cheat/ boring/ sponger etc...... the ppl that CANT be single and that go with any old body are the one who will suffer later on when they cant rely on themselfs. i believe there is sum1 out there for us all. u cud meet them tday on theway home or the day b4 u peg it!!! CHIN UP :)

u are not ugly at all! believe me there are sooo many ppl in ur situation- and it just goes to show how difficult it can be meeting sum1 but isnt it better to not be with any one than to be with sum1 who is either a cheat/ boring/ sponger etc...... the ppl that CANT be single and that go with any old body are the one who will suffer later on when they cant rely on themselfs. i believe there is sum1 out there for us all. u cud meet them tday on theway home or the day b4 u peg it!!! CHIN UP :)

Thanks.:thumbsup:

True looks aren't everything and maybe you are right I will have to rely on my personality rather than stunning good looks. The problem is I don't have a great personality either.

Perhaps if you decide to join an on line dating site you should let someone else do your profile!

Slim - Is you internet personality totally different to real life or is it the same.
on the internet you do come accross quite scary and very wierd.

Slim - Is you internet personality totally different to real life or is it the same.
on the internet you do come accross quite scary and very wierd.

A good question. I would say that my internet personality is my real personality in extremis as it were. I do have a rather querky sense of humour but I go somewhat overboard here. I am in a creative writing group and post things here that are a little too way out to do in that group.

I do have a healthy interest in pretty girls (what man doesn't) BUT AM BY NO MEANS OBSESSED WITH THEM. Despite what people think I would never dream of stalking a girl or trying to force myself on to them. Any girl who met me in real life would more than likely find me a rather shy and unsure person.

Thanks. I'm glad you think I am not in that bad a situation. True looks aren't everything and maybe you are right I will have to rely on my personality rather than stunning good looks. The problem is I don't have a great personality either.

The one thing I know I definately have in my favour is that I never get disheartened (well almost never) and don't give up easily. I know you know what i look like - would you say i was really bad looking?

Who says your personality aint great? You?????

Get yourself out and about making friends and meeting a woman will come Sid (and so will you :D)

slimsid- ur who ur and dont change that 4 no one ''theres nowt as queer as folk'' and at least u have the guts (unlike sum chamelions on here) to admit what ur really like!! i think u must eb pretty confident and sure of urself to do that!!! :) im on ur side :)

Firstly I never said anything about being middle aged or white that was your assumption and this is exactly the sort of thing I meant. You seem to me (I could be wrong) like a typical PC person who has loads of sympathy for a wide variety of groups yet anyone who is male, white and (maybe) middleaged is not really worthy of such understanding.

If i may be permitted just a very quick point about my own situation to clear up any misunderstanding. There is nothing intrinsically wrong with me. My limited social and conversational skills are due purley to lack of ample opportunities to put them into practice and thus a vicious circle exists. If only a girl (who i fancy - that is important-) would be prepared to give me a chance (only the same chance as they would other men mind - I'm not asking for special privilages) then I would (over time) become just as socailly accumplished as the rest of you.

are you not male, middle-aged and white, then? because that's what your original post screamed to me. that doesn't mean i have a problem with middle-aged white men, or that i feel any sympathy for them as a group; i have very few feelings on the matter.

what understanding is it that you as an individual want, or do you want understanding for the whole group? is having no girlfriend all that makes someone join this category of 'sad' men? I have plenty of sympathy for people who are lonely, if that's what you individually want, or are there other things that constitute this 'sad' category that i should also have sympathy for? My point is that girlfriendless middle aged white men is a huge group of people, for whom, as a group, no - i have no sympathy. They are not usually the people that have no access to hospital care, they often have decent incomes, they are not usually going hungry. To reiterate my original point - there are so many groups of people in the world to worry about than to automatically feel sympathy for a group that as a whole (nb not on an individual basis) don't deserve or need sympathy. Yes, i sympathise that you would like a girlfriend and don't have one, but if lack of girlfriend is all that is bothering you then i don't think you've got much to worry about - you have your health, your home, your friends. do you honestly think 'sad' white men deserve sympathy? do i deserve PC protection for being someone's wife? no, and i'm sure there's plenty of offensive jokes, cliches and stereotypes out there about married women. yes, some of them are offensive and wrong, but again - there's so much more out there to worry about than protecting the sensibilites of 'wives' as a group.

slimsid- ur who ur and dont change that 4 no one ''theres nowt as queer as folk'' and at least u have the guts (unlike sum chamelions on here) to admit what ur really like!! i think u must eb pretty confident and sure of urself to do that!!! :) im on ur side :)

But dont you think he shoudl get out and baout and stop concentrating on looking for a girl, which he would more likely drive away through suffication?

Sid does get some stick, some warranted by his posts and other not. But he need to help himself. Cyclone is crrect he's had many pages of support and help. Ppl will only sympathise so much

[QUOTE=Cyclone]you add the rider (who I fancy), but from previous discussions it would appear that you have set very high standards.

QUOTE]

Actually my standards are no higher than those of the vast majority of men. I don't expect a supermodel or anyone like that but would be quite happy with any reasonably good looking girl. No i don't want someone who I find really unattractive but then who would. I'm not asking for any more than the vast majority of men.

you'd be quite happy with any reasonably looking girl?

how very decent of you.

you think that 'sad' men deserve respect and sympathy? what about girls that aren't reasonably good looking? you don't seem to have much respect for them. you asked for serious responses to your thread, but this seems to have turned away from being a reasonable serious thread to one directed to bolstering your ego. yes, i'm all for a thread evolving, and you obviously didn't direct it to turn out how it currently is, but honestly, this is getting a bit away from the point.

I reckon if the fella that started this thread spent as much time looking for a bird as he does posting useless threads about himself on here, such as the one where forum members had to guess which photo was him, he might get one!

[QUOTE=slimsid2000]

you'd be quite happy with any reasonably looking girl?

how very decent of you.

you think that 'sad' men deserve respect and sympathy? what about girls that aren't reasonably good looking? .

Sorry but you misunderstand. I mean any girl that I find resonably good looking. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and a girl who i find attractive may not be attractive to another man (and vise versa). Anyway I am only talking about me choosing to go out with her i never said anyone should be disrespected because of her looks.

Look at it another way; what do you expect me to do, go out with a girl i find unattractive? Is that really what you are advocating?

Sorry but you misunderstand. I mean any girl that I find resonably good looking. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and a girl who i find attractive may not be attractive to another man (and vise versa). Anyway I am only talking about me choosing to go out with her i never said anyone should be disrespected because of her looks.

Look at it another way; what do you expect me to do, go out with a girl i find unattractive? Is that really what you are advocating?

no, i wouldn't expect anyone to go out with anyone they don't fancy, it's a fair cop. i'm just irritated at the course this thread, which was moderately interesting but has rather lost track, and have resorted to picking holes where they only exist if one chooses to be oversensitive. but that in itself adds something that i failed to mention before - if one goes looking for things to be offended by, one can usually find something. do you not think this might be the case about your 'sad man' issue? perhaps a little oversensitive, and find things offensive that other people wouldn't even notice?

[QUOTE=babychickens]

Look at it another way; what do you expect me to do, go out with a girl i find unattractive? Is that really what you are advocating?

Dating's a bit like owning a car really. You start at the bottom and work your way up. Try a rusty old banger first, then, if you're lucky, you may end up with a sleek little Merc. I'm sure I know just the girl for you Slimsid, but I think Jade Goody is spoken for at the moment.:thumbsup:

It's a general thing. It seems that men who can't find a girlfriend are seen as a legitimate target while other groups (black, gay etc) are not. Why?

I've not read the whole thread, but I wondered why this thread was put up to begin with. Anyway... to answer your Q.

This is how I see it.
There's racial discrimination, discrimination, and then there's prejudice.

Racial discrimination and PC go hand in hand. People who are gay, or black, or whatever ethnicities they are from are just that. It's not something they can change. So it's unfair to shout abuse at these people who cannot change the colour of their skin or their family background.

Whereas prejudice are everywhere. From the subject of whether a girl is pretty or not, to whether a man is 'sad' or not. It is the person's own prejudices that are shining through. Whoever said that you're a sad man, well.... it is their problem. Not yours. Don't let their words affect you. Usually, girls who uses such words on guys are kinda insecure in themselves, either that, they are ignorant and are going through a stage of 'self discovery' and respect. (Scientifically put, she won't see u as a potential sexual partner, so just move on...forget about her.) Some girls see how certain guys behave, and they run a mile. Maybe it's a nature thing. Yet as you get older, and you learn more about social ettiquette, then this is toned down a lot more.

Personally, I've not seen such groups are targetted. Though, 'do-gooders' would question why you don't have a partner... at my last workplace, my colleagues were trying subtlely to pair me up with any single guys going ! (I find it a tad insulting, cos it's invading my personal life.) Yet, they would also goss about the guys that are single too, and are older. I see nothing wrong with how people want to conduct their lives. It's down to the individuals. Some people may take their time to recovery from their last relationship, others just go on the rebound. Whereas others don't want the time spent or emotions invested when they want to set their career in motion. Whatever the reasons, it's nobody's business but yours. If ppl are bugging you, then set them straight.

Cloudybay - CLASSIC!

You've given me the best laugh i've had all week!

Slim - sitting in front of a computer saying you have a 'perceived' not great personality isn't going to develop it now is it?

Get out, meet people, practice and develop your social skills. What do people find attractive in other people? A good sense of humour, confidence etc. What do people find unattracive? Moaning whingers!

People are not born with social skills, they develop them. If you think your personality is lacking in some way (though others may not agree with you) do something about it. You can change if you have the will to do so. As for taking the mick out of 'sad' people - there are so many things in life to have a good laugh at without having to single out any individual or group.

Sorry but you misunderstand. I mean any girl that I find resonably good looking. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and a girl who i find attractive may not be attractive to another man (and vise versa). Anyway I am only talking about me choosing to go out with her i never said anyone should be disrespected because of her looks.

Look at it another way; what do you expect me to do, go out with a girl i find unattractive ? Is that really what you are advocating ?

You remind me of a friend. Unless you wanna do a 'mail order' bride thing, then may I suggest that you should just go out and enjoy life ! Don't think about the lack of a partner too much. It will do your head in. I've been adviced that, and equally, I would remind my singleton friends that too. It is when we are at our happiest, do we tend to attract a partner. Just go out, and do things that you enjoy. From doing that, you'll probably find one or two girl that u like the look of, and can ask out.

Let me tell u a story. A group of friends of mine went on a walking trip together. Most of the girls commented on how nice this male friend of mine was. i.e. charming, funny, witty etc. Then he went and did this psycho thing of showing off to this other guy whereby he used a butter knife and stabbing the gaps between his fingers. 'OW!' :rolleyes: Well, the girls were NOT impressed after that, esp when he hurt himself. It was stupid, it was dangerous.

Moral of the story ? First impression counts. There's somebody for everybody. The fact that the girls still remember the impression that the guy made on them was a good starting point. If the guy pursued and asked any one of these girls out, they prob would've said yes !